tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-37660192995627173582024-03-18T19:49:54.739-07:00Is She On To Me?Lucretia McCloudhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07064997700656978645noreply@blogger.comBlogger47125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3766019299562717358.post-34649107908845699622018-05-12T15:18:00.002-07:002018-05-12T15:18:34.175-07:00Love & Marriage <div class="fonted font_custom font_quicksand" style="box-sizing: border-box; font-family: Quicksand; font-size: 1.1em;">
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<span style="background-color: black;"><span style="color: white;"><br /></span></span></h1>
<h1 class="title vcard item" style="box-sizing: border-box; font-size: 23px; font-weight: normal; line-height: 55px; margin: 1.5em 0px;">
<a class="nocolor fn" href="https://allpoetry.com/poem/13887581-Love---Marriage-by-Lucretia-Mccloud" style="background-color: black; box-sizing: border-box; text-decoration-line: none;"><span style="color: white;">Love & Marriage</span></a></h1>
<div class="poem_body" style="box-sizing: border-box;">
<span style="background-color: black;"><span style="color: white;">Greek philia's love is to be generously seeded<br style="box-sizing: border-box;" />to become a binding<br style="box-sizing: border-box;" />climbing<br style="box-sizing: border-box;" />flourishing vine<br style="box-sizing: border-box;" />on a sturdy wall mellowed in time<br style="box-sizing: border-box;" /><br style="box-sizing: border-box;" />surrounding a garden budding various colored blossoms in love entwined<br style="box-sizing: border-box;" /><br style="box-sizing: border-box;" />during springtime showers<br style="box-sizing: border-box;" />or summer's thundering rain<br style="box-sizing: border-box;" />humanly inclined<br style="box-sizing: border-box;" /><br style="box-sizing: border-box;" />though still producing: sunflowers, daisies, tulips, and roses with thorns which prick thin skin.<br style="box-sizing: border-box;" /><br style="box-sizing: border-box;" />Yet a lingering kiss will ease a pain to quickly rescind<br style="box-sizing: border-box;" />as eyes and limbs gently lock before another sun rises to joint days begin<br style="box-sizing: border-box;" /><br style="box-sizing: border-box;" />until a descending sun sets<br style="box-sizing: border-box;" />to difficulties pause or calmly end<br style="box-sizing: border-box;" /><br style="box-sizing: border-box;" />as eʹros love brings delight<br style="box-sizing: border-box;" />under a partial or full moon<br style="box-sizing: border-box;" />even in the dead of night<br style="box-sizing: border-box;" /><br style="box-sizing: border-box;" />or afternoon<br style="box-sizing: border-box;" /><br style="box-sizing: border-box;" />or a morning spin<br style="box-sizing: border-box;" />is not too soon,<br style="box-sizing: border-box;" /><br style="box-sizing: border-box;" />though constant thought of it<br style="box-sizing: border-box;" />should not our life or marriage<br style="box-sizing: border-box;" />totally<br style="box-sizing: border-box;" />consume<br style="box-sizing: border-box;" />as if for this only<br style="box-sizing: border-box;" />in one's heart<br style="box-sizing: border-box;" />makes room<br style="box-sizing: border-box;" /><br style="box-sizing: border-box;" />for stor·geʹ love<br style="box-sizing: border-box;" /><br style="box-sizing: border-box;" />as progeny sprouts<br style="box-sizing: border-box;" /><br style="box-sizing: border-box;" />to not impede their stems' growth<br style="box-sizing: border-box;" /><br style="box-sizing: border-box;" />of your true love<br style="box-sizing: border-box;" />they should not doubt.<br style="box-sizing: border-box;" /><br style="box-sizing: border-box;" />Watering freely<br style="box-sizing: border-box;" />and pruning<br style="box-sizing: border-box;" />as needed<br style="box-sizing: border-box;" /><br style="box-sizing: border-box;" />leaves<br style="box-sizing: border-box;" /><br style="box-sizing: border-box;" />guidelines<br style="box-sizing: border-box;" />swallowed<br style="box-sizing: border-box;" /><br style="box-sizing: border-box;" />after mildly dispensed<br style="box-sizing: border-box;" /><br style="box-sizing: border-box;" />as compost to soil<br style="box-sizing: border-box;" />carefully<br style="box-sizing: border-box;" />attended.<br style="box-sizing: border-box;" /><br style="box-sizing: border-box;" />Yes, as with also<br style="box-sizing: border-box;" />shade and shine<br style="box-sizing: border-box;" /><br style="box-sizing: border-box;" />strengthened spines<br style="box-sizing: border-box;" />will ascend<br style="box-sizing: border-box;" />gracefully<br style="box-sizing: border-box;" /><br style="box-sizing: border-box;" />as mature<br style="box-sizing: border-box;" />visions<br style="box-sizing: border-box;" /><br style="box-sizing: border-box;" />seen<br style="box-sizing: border-box;" />before these<br style="box-sizing: border-box;" /><br style="box-sizing: border-box;" />also, imbibe<br style="box-sizing: border-box;" /><br style="box-sizing: border-box;" />life-sustaining nutrients<br style="box-sizing: border-box;" />thankfully<br style="box-sizing: border-box;" />heeded.<br style="box-sizing: border-box;" /><br style="box-sizing: border-box;" />And let us not neglect<br style="box-sizing: border-box;" />agape love<br style="box-sizing: border-box;" />to ensure sure success<br style="box-sizing: border-box;" />of a bind of souls<br style="box-sizing: border-box;" />holy blessed.<br style="box-sizing: border-box;" /><br style="box-sizing: border-box;" />For the apostle Paul<br style="box-sizing: border-box;" />duly stressed:<br style="box-sizing: border-box;" /><br style="box-sizing: border-box;" />“Each one of you must love his wife<br style="box-sizing: border-box;" />as he does himself;<br style="box-sizing: border-box;" /><br style="box-sizing: border-box;" />on the other hand,<br style="box-sizing: border-box;" /><br style="box-sizing: border-box;" />the wife should have deep respect for her husband.” <i style="box-sizing: border-box;">Eph. 5:33</i>.<br style="box-sizing: border-box;" /><br style="box-sizing: border-box;" />Yes.<br style="box-sizing: border-box;" /><br style="box-sizing: border-box;" />Only after spreading freely<br style="box-sizing: border-box;" />these various loves to abound<br style="box-sizing: border-box;" /><br style="box-sizing: border-box;" />will days into moons<br style="box-sizing: border-box;" />seasons into years<br style="box-sizing: border-box;" />generations to appear<br style="box-sizing: border-box;" />and coexist<br style="box-sizing: border-box;" />eternally<br style="box-sizing: border-box;" /><br style="box-sizing: border-box;" />as couples display a marital bliss<br style="box-sizing: border-box;" /><br style="box-sizing: border-box;" />as baskets of fruitage<br style="box-sizing: border-box;" />luscious<br style="box-sizing: border-box;" />delicious<br style="box-sizing: border-box;" /><br style="box-sizing: border-box;" />sound<br style="box-sizing: border-box;" /><br style="box-sizing: border-box;" />of which diverse plantings<br style="box-sizing: border-box;" />themselves<br style="box-sizing: border-box;" />can eagerly partake<br style="box-sizing: border-box;" /><br style="box-sizing: border-box;" />if on sweet harmony<br style="box-sizing: border-box;" />they too insist<br style="box-sizing: border-box;" /><br style="box-sizing: border-box;" />will a paradisaic garden<br style="box-sizing: border-box;" />exist for imperfect until perfect<br style="box-sizing: border-box;" />humanity's sake<br style="box-sizing: border-box;" /><br style="box-sizing: border-box;" />under divine guidance<br style="box-sizing: border-box;" />based upon<br style="box-sizing: border-box;" /><br style="box-sizing: border-box;" />love<br style="box-sizing: border-box;" /><br style="box-sizing: border-box;" />on which our Creator<br style="box-sizing: border-box;" /><br style="box-sizing: border-box;" />totally<br style="box-sizing: border-box;" />insists.<br style="box-sizing: border-box;" /><br style="box-sizing: border-box;" />May the dew of Jah's words<br style="box-sizing: border-box;" />moisten your fields to plentifully yield<br style="box-sizing: border-box;" /><br style="box-sizing: border-box;" />true love<br style="box-sizing: border-box;" /><br style="box-sizing: border-box;" />never to desist.<br style="box-sizing: border-box;" /><br style="box-sizing: border-box;" />Brotherly love<br style="box-sizing: border-box;" />even to mates<br style="box-sizing: border-box;" /><br style="box-sizing: border-box;" />displayed daily<br style="box-sizing: border-box;" /><br style="box-sizing: border-box;" />not to forsake.</span></span><br />
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<span style="background-color: black;"><span style="color: white;">Continue putting up with one another and forgiving one another freely even if anyone has a cause for complaint against another. Just as Jehovah* freely forgave you, you must also do the same. But besides all these things, clothe yourselves with love, for it is a perfect bond of union." Col. 3:13, 14.<br style="box-sizing: border-box;" /><br style="box-sizing: border-box;" />After the Wedding Day<br style="box-sizing: border-box;" /><a href="https://wol.jw.org/en/wol/d/r1/lp-e/1102017570?q=marriage&p=par" rel="nofollow" style="box-sizing: border-box; text-decoration-line: none;">https://wol.jw.org/en/wol/d/r1/lp-e/1102017570?q=marriage&p=par</a><span class="author_copyright" style="box-sizing: border-box;"> © <abbr class="timeago-automatic-refresh" datetime="2018-05-12T08:50:45Z" style="border: none !important; box-sizing: border-box; text-decoration-line: none; text-decoration-style: initial;" title="on May 12">13 hours ago</abbr><span class="copy_name" style="box-sizing: border-box;">, Lucretia Mccloud </span><i class="sprite leaf-gold" style="background-image: url("/images/sprite.png"); background-position: -708px -57px; box-sizing: border-box; display: inline-block; height: 17px; width: 15px; zoom: 0.85;"></i> <span class="nocolor cats_dot" style="box-sizing: border-box;"><a href="https://allpoetry.com/poems/about/love" style="box-sizing: border-box; text-decoration-line: none;">love </a>• <a href="https://allpoetry.com/poems/about/nature" style="box-sizing: border-box; text-decoration-line: none;">nature </a>• <a href="https://allpoetry.com/poems/about/hope" style="box-sizing: border-box; text-decoration-line: none;">hope </a>• <a href="https://allpoetry.com/poems/about/family" style="box-sizing: border-box; text-decoration-line: none;">family </a>• <a href="https://allpoetry.com/poems/about/teen" style="box-sizing: border-box; text-decoration-line: none;">teen </a></span><span class="nocolor" style="box-sizing: border-box;"><span class="st_shares nocolor" style="box-sizing: border-box;"><a href="https://www.facebook.com/sharer/sharer.php?app_id=113613998666044&display=popup&sdk=joey&u=http%3A%2F%2Fallpoetry.com%2F13887581" style="box-sizing: border-box; padding: 8px 3px; text-decoration-line: none;" target="_blank"><span class="fa fa-facebook-square" style="box-sizing: border-box; display: inline-block; font-family: "fontawesome"; font-size: inherit; font-stretch: normal; line-height: 1; transform: translate(0px , 0px);"></span> </a><a href="https://twitter.com/intent/tweet?related=all_poetry&text=Love+%26+Marriage+by+Lucretia+Mccloud+%40all_poetry&url=http%3A%2F%2Fallpoetry.com%2F13887581" style="box-sizing: border-box; padding: 8px 3px; text-decoration-line: none;" target="_blank"><span class="fa fa-twitter-square" style="box-sizing: border-box; display: inline-block; font-family: "fontawesome"; font-size: inherit; font-stretch: normal; line-height: 1; transform: translate(0px , 0px);"></span> </a><a class="no_pop" href="mailto:?body=I%20wanted%20to%20share%20this%20with%20you%3A%20Love%20%26%20Marriage%20by%20Lucretia%20Mccloud%0A%0Ahttp%3A%2F%2Fallpoetry.com%2F13887581&subject=Love%20%26%20Marriage%20by%20Lucretia%20Mccloud" style="box-sizing: border-box; padding: 8px 3px; text-decoration-line: none;"><span class="fa fa-envelope-o" style="box-sizing: border-box; display: inline-block; font-family: "fontawesome"; font-size: inherit; font-stretch: normal; line-height: 1; transform: translate(0px , 0px);"></span></a></span></span></span></span></span></div>
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Lucretia McCloudhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07064997700656978645noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3766019299562717358.post-70150966892100637732016-03-06T04:50:00.002-08:002016-03-06T12:46:07.649-08:00<a href="https://www.pinterest.com/lucretiamccloud/diamonds-world/">https://www.pinterest.com/lucretiamccloud/diamonds-world/</a><br />
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Lucretia McCloudhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07064997700656978645noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3766019299562717358.post-90549274384914287412016-01-15T03:40:00.003-08:002016-04-27T14:11:30.817-07:00Forever, My Love<h1 itemprop="itemreviewed" style="background-color: white; box-sizing: border-box; color: #141823; font-family: monospace; font-size: 23px; font-weight: normal; line-height: 55px; margin: 20px 0px 10px;">
Forever, My Love</h1>
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by Seah Greenhorn</div>
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(Poem with copyright)</div>
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<span style="background-color: white; color: #141823; font-family: monospace; font-size: 14px; line-height: 25.2px;">Flowers</span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; color: #141823; font-family: monospace; font-size: 14px; line-height: 25.2px;">laid premature</span><br />
<br style="background-color: white; box-sizing: border-box; color: #141823; font-family: monospace; font-size: 14px; line-height: 25.2px;" />
<span style="background-color: white; color: #141823; font-family: monospace; font-size: 14px; line-height: 25.2px;">pain I fight to endure</span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; color: #141823; font-family: monospace; font-size: 14px; line-height: 25.2px;">as I kneel</span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; color: #141823; font-family: monospace; font-size: 14px; line-height: 25.2px;">my knees</span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; color: #141823; font-family: monospace; font-size: 14px; line-height: 25.2px;">pebbles to bleed</span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; color: #141823; font-family: monospace; font-size: 14px; line-height: 25.2px;">for my heart</span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; color: #141823; font-family: monospace; font-size: 14px; line-height: 25.2px;">to be allowed to feel</span><br />
<br style="background-color: white; box-sizing: border-box; color: #141823; font-family: monospace; font-size: 14px; line-height: 25.2px;" />
<span style="background-color: white; color: #141823; font-family: monospace; font-size: 14px; line-height: 25.2px;">whatever it needs</span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; color: #141823; font-family: monospace; font-size: 14px; line-height: 25.2px;">to heal.</span><br />
<br style="background-color: white; box-sizing: border-box; color: #141823; font-family: monospace; font-size: 14px; line-height: 25.2px;" />
<span style="background-color: white; color: #141823; font-family: monospace; font-size: 14px; line-height: 25.2px;">Unable to pray</span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; color: #141823; font-family: monospace; font-size: 14px; line-height: 25.2px;">since anger rips aside</span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; color: #141823; font-family: monospace; font-size: 14px; line-height: 25.2px;">sheer layers</span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; color: #141823; font-family: monospace; font-size: 14px; line-height: 25.2px;">I applied</span><br />
<br style="background-color: white; box-sizing: border-box; color: #141823; font-family: monospace; font-size: 14px; line-height: 25.2px;" />
<span style="background-color: white; color: #141823; font-family: monospace; font-size: 14px; line-height: 25.2px;">to hide loneliness;</span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; color: #141823; font-family: monospace; font-size: 14px; line-height: 25.2px;">pride;</span><br />
<i style="background-color: white; box-sizing: border-box; color: #141823; font-family: monospace; font-size: 14px; line-height: 25.2px;">my right</i><span style="background-color: white; color: #141823; font-family: monospace; font-size: 14px; line-height: 25.2px;"> to decide.</span><br />
<br style="background-color: white; box-sizing: border-box; color: #141823; font-family: monospace; font-size: 14px; line-height: 25.2px;" />
<span style="background-color: white; color: #141823; font-family: monospace; font-size: 14px; line-height: 25.2px;">Did I choose wisely?</span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; color: #141823; font-family: monospace; font-size: 14px; line-height: 25.2px;">This question crazy</span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; color: #141823; font-family: monospace; font-size: 14px; line-height: 25.2px;">wrong. My logic confused;</span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; color: #141823; font-family: monospace; font-size: 14px; line-height: 25.2px;">hazy.</span><br />
<br style="background-color: white; box-sizing: border-box; color: #141823; font-family: monospace; font-size: 14px; line-height: 25.2px;" />
<span style="background-color: white; color: #141823; font-family: monospace; font-size: 14px; line-height: 25.2px;">Desire chose for me</span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; color: #141823; font-family: monospace; font-size: 14px; line-height: 25.2px;">a fireman, an officer of the law,</span><br />
<br style="background-color: white; box-sizing: border-box; color: #141823; font-family: monospace; font-size: 14px; line-height: 25.2px;" />
<span style="background-color: white; color: #141823; font-family: monospace; font-size: 14px; line-height: 25.2px;">a boxer</span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; color: #141823; font-family: monospace; font-size: 14px; line-height: 25.2px;">who could rupture</span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; color: #141823; font-family: monospace; font-size: 14px; line-height: 25.2px;">my jaw?</span><br />
<br style="background-color: white; box-sizing: border-box; color: #141823; font-family: monospace; font-size: 14px; line-height: 25.2px;" />
<span style="background-color: white; color: #141823; font-family: monospace; font-size: 14px; line-height: 25.2px;">No. I chose you. To follow.</span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; color: #141823; font-family: monospace; font-size: 14px; line-height: 25.2px;">To pursue. To love. To hate</span><br />
<br style="background-color: white; box-sizing: border-box; color: #141823; font-family: monospace; font-size: 14px; line-height: 25.2px;" />
<span style="background-color: white; color: #141823; font-family: monospace; font-size: 14px; line-height: 25.2px;">as I now do.</span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; color: #141823; font-family: monospace; font-size: 14px; line-height: 25.2px;">I refused to lose</span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; color: #141823; font-family: monospace; font-size: 14px; line-height: 25.2px;">you.</span><br />
<br style="background-color: white; box-sizing: border-box; color: #141823; font-family: monospace; font-size: 14px; line-height: 25.2px;" />
<span style="background-color: white; color: #141823; font-family: monospace; font-size: 14px; line-height: 25.2px;">But you knew how</span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; color: #141823; font-family: monospace; font-size: 14px; line-height: 25.2px;">much I wished</span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; color: #141823; font-family: monospace; font-size: 14px; line-height: 25.2px;">you'd adhere...</span><br />
<br style="background-color: white; box-sizing: border-box; color: #141823; font-family: monospace; font-size: 14px; line-height: 25.2px;" />
<span style="background-color: white; color: #141823; font-family: monospace; font-size: 14px; line-height: 25.2px;">Why the need</span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; color: #141823; font-family: monospace; font-size: 14px; line-height: 25.2px;">to text</span><br />
<br style="background-color: white; box-sizing: border-box; color: #141823; font-family: monospace; font-size: 14px; line-height: 25.2px;" />
<span style="background-color: white; color: #141823; font-family: monospace; font-size: 14px; line-height: 25.2px;">when I was so near?</span><br />
<br style="background-color: white; box-sizing: border-box; color: #141823; font-family: monospace; font-size: 14px; line-height: 25.2px;" />
<span style="background-color: white; color: #141823; font-family: monospace; font-size: 14px; line-height: 25.2px;">If I had married</span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; color: #141823; font-family: monospace; font-size: 14px; line-height: 25.2px;">any of the above</span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; color: #141823; font-family: monospace; font-size: 14px; line-height: 25.2px;">then my future</span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; color: #141823; font-family: monospace; font-size: 14px; line-height: 25.2px;">would have at least</span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; color: #141823; font-family: monospace; font-size: 14px; line-height: 25.2px;">been clear.</span><br />
<br style="background-color: white; box-sizing: border-box; color: #141823; font-family: monospace; font-size: 14px; line-height: 25.2px;" />
<span style="background-color: white; color: #141823; font-family: monospace; font-size: 14px; line-height: 25.2px;">Though,</span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; color: #141823; font-family: monospace; font-size: 14px; line-height: 25.2px;">know this I wish</span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; color: #141823; font-family: monospace; font-size: 14px; line-height: 25.2px;">you could hear:</span><br />
<br style="background-color: white; box-sizing: border-box; color: #141823; font-family: monospace; font-size: 14px; line-height: 25.2px;" />
<span style="background-color: white; color: #141823; font-family: monospace; font-size: 14px; line-height: 25.2px;">I'll always love</span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; color: #141823; font-family: monospace; font-size: 14px; line-height: 25.2px;">and cherish you,</span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; color: #141823; font-family: monospace; font-size: 14px; line-height: 25.2px;">dear.</span>Lucretia McCloudhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07064997700656978645noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3766019299562717358.post-18673540426902106402015-11-17T10:02:00.000-08:002015-11-17T10:02:32.272-08:00Is She On To Me? ... Chapter Thirteen<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 200%; text-align: center; text-indent: .5in;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 200%; mso-bidi-font-weight: bold;">Chapter Thirteen<o:p></o:p></span><br />
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 200%; mso-bidi-font-weight: bold;"><br /></span>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 200%; text-align: justify; text-indent: .5in;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 200%;"><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS", sans-serif;">“Okay, I'm awake!” I scolded the
buzzing alarm slamming the stop button. <i>I
know its five a.m; I saw it arrive</i><i>!</i>
no thanks to the nightmare. Plus a
suicidal headache pitch-n-rolled me the whole night like seaweed in high
tide. Entangled, yet hiding in sheets
and covers, I tried to ignore the masochist behind my eyes. I scanned the room hoping reality would quash
the lingering night fright. But gothic
candle-holders flanking the iron bed frame resembled emaciated arms. And a headless mannequin near the window wore
something long and dark, casting eerie distortions against the opposite
wall. The dress-form became a macabre-being
in the dim slither of disappearing moonlight—light flitting through a narrow
slit between the heavy silk drapes. Even
my old brown teddy bear looked threatening, seated on a slipcovered chair
outside my closet. One glass eye glared
at me, while the other was concealed in shadow.<o:p></o:p></span></span><br />
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 200%;"><br /><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS", sans-serif;"></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 200%; text-align: justify; text-indent: .5in;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 200%;"><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS", sans-serif;">“Okay!” Goaded, I stretched to click on the brightest
light from the tiffany lamp near me on the side table, ending with a squeal and
my head in my hands. Moaning; my fingers
dug into, then massaged the mast of tangles at my temples. Though, damp sheets and cold penetrated my
cotton nightshirt I fixated on the lamp and its exquisite light, its
kaleidoscope of colors emanating from the multi-color hood. Slightly soothed since the lamp dispersed the
air of terror with exposure of my skirt and blouse folded neatly with Teddy on
top, I clicked on the gas fireplace.
Then I noticed: <i>My trench is on the mannequin. . . . When did
that happen? And who tidied up? </i>stayed a mute issue as I was
suddenly lobbed forward after attempting to climb out of bed. My toe caught a rip in the quilt.<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 200%; text-align: justify; text-indent: .5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS", sans-serif;"></span><br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 200%; text-align: justify; text-indent: .5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS", sans-serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 200%;">Quickly kicking off the blanket with
arms swinging, I caught my balance.
Though stepping forward I began to roll on an empty bottle. <i>Good grief! </i>I thought as<i> </i>my head barely missed the edge of the
wrought iron headboard as I seized the railing.
<i>That’s all I need—</i>to be knocked out sprawled across the
floor. And while clutching the frame, an
image. <i>Honestly! </i> <i>Of all
people,</i> I imaged seeing nice nosy Prudence Nobles. The vision appeared like déjà vu. The apparition scared and embarrassed
me. I actually looked around expecting
to see displeasure shown by her shaking head.
Her eyes an accusing “Had a relapse?”</span><br />
<i style="text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;"><span style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 200%;"><br /></span></i><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS", sans-serif;">
<i style="text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;"><span style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 200%;">It </span><span style="line-height: 32px;">hasn't</span><span style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 200%;"> happened again, has it? </span></i><span style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 200%; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">I wondered. <i>Forget
about it, Diamond.</i> <i>Never mind. Mend the quilt. </i>It was a good enough diversion. And who knew.
I thought,<i> maybe the project along with a strong cup of coffee will
get rid of this annoying bubble in my stomach</i>. Exactly what I was afraid of escaped me. But this hovering ever-present phantom
existed. . . <i>Yes, coffee will help</i>.</span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 200%;"><br /><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS", sans-serif;"></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 200%; text-align: justify; text-indent: .5in;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 200%;"><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS", sans-serif;">I swooped up the quilt from the bed;
flung it forward, close to the rocker placed in front of the brick
fireplace. I found myself smiling at the
misshapen bundle. Yes, my big bozo
stitches were an eyesore. <i>But what
would anyone expect from a child of six?</i>
Back then, even now, Martha I’m not.
Its age, wear, and pattern is why it stayed beneath the down
comforter. Though matching no bed clothing
I possessed, I loved the comforter more than anything else I owned—non-apparel
included.<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 200%; text-align: justify; text-indent: .5in;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 200%;"><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS", sans-serif;">My family: Seneca, Mom, and Madame
donated old shirts and dresses of chambray and cotton for the squares. Also, my worn floral and denim outfits I’d
outgrown, along with trims of lace from old doll clothes we cut up, piecing everything
together to make squares. Madame and I
worked together connecting the swatches on the old heavy sewing machine with
the metal knee control.<o:p></o:p></span></span><br />
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 200%;"><br /><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS", sans-serif;"></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 200%; text-align: justify; text-indent: .5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS", sans-serif;"><i><span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 200%;">Umm</span></i><span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 200%;">. I remember
the aroma of French-roasted coffee traveling from the kitchen permeated the
apartment. Signaled the completion of
the pot of java, courtesy of my trusty coffeemaker with automatic timer. Comfortable.
Ordinary. I adored the smell. I recalled a more pleasant present. All my wistful pining took a pause. A little bit of joy attempted a comeback.<o:p></o:p></span></span><br />
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 200%;"><br /><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS", sans-serif;"></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 200%; text-align: justify; text-indent: .5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS", sans-serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 200%;">Grabbing my plaid terry robe from the
coat tree on the way out of the door, I headed to the kitchen. After pouring my coffee, I set the cup on the
kitchen table before poking around in the antique armoire. Passing bottles of solace, I reached for the
hand-carved mending-box of threads. I
found the colors necessary to match the shabby sections, then with my left hand
balanced the box on my head. My right
hand cradled the cup of liquid gold, as I carefully transported all goods to
the bedroom where I settled in the gliding rocker.</span><br />
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 200%;"><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS", sans-serif;"> <o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 200%; text-align: justify; text-indent: .5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS", sans-serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 200%;">Staring into the fireplace, before
long, I saw tall strong Madame. Then my
mother, Crystal—Madame’s dainty soft-spoken daughter. Two complete opposites. I remembered us sitting around the patched
comforter-top spread between us on the living room floor giggling and
talking. Placing layers of high-loft
polyester batting resembling puffy clouds on the covering, while Madame taught
me the essentials of quilt making.</span><br />
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 200%;"><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS", sans-serif;"> <o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 200%; text-align: justify; text-indent: .5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS", sans-serif;"><i><span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 200%;">Lovely moments like those were
rare. </span></i><span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 200%;">But when wallowing in self-pity this particular memory
provides nostalgic release. Everyone
together. Even Seneca somewhere in the
same house. <i>Then,</i> we enjoyed each other’s company.</span></span><br />
<i style="line-height: 200%; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;"><span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 200%;"><br /></span></i>
<i style="line-height: 200%; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;"><span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 200%;">Funny, though</span></i><span style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 200%; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">.
</span><i style="text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;"><span style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 200%;">I </span><span style="line-height: 32px;">couldn't</span><span style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 200%;">; </span><span style="line-height: 32px;">can't</span><span style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 200%;"> really picture Seneca</span></i><span style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 200%; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">. But surprisingly I heard his voice. </span><i style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 200%; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">Can still hear his voice</i><span style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 200%; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">. Not exactly what he said, only that his voice
comforted me like warm chocolate milk that I loved as a child. Every other blue moon, I’ll still make a cup.</span><br />
<span style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 200%; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 200%; text-align: justify; text-indent: .5in;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 200%;">However, that day the quilt failed to
bring a lasting calm. <i>Actually, it
produced the opposite.</i> It brought up
the unresolved questions about Mom and Madame’s relationship. Those questions rose and exploded in my head
more than the nightmare.<o:p></o:p></span><br />
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 200%;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 200%; text-align: justify; text-indent: .5in;">
<i><span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 200%;">Maybe they were the nightmare</span></i><span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 200%;">.<o:p></o:p></span><br />
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 200%;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 200%; text-align: justify; text-indent: .5in;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 200%;">I remembered gliding rapidly back and
forth. <i>I guess: Chasing words</i>. Words of wisdom. Words—which would convert those questions
into answers. Answers which would
promote family unity. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 200%; text-align: justify; text-indent: .5in;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 200%;">And I remembered the subway
episode. It also shook me up. Turned everything topsy-turvy again. <i>One day flying made grounding out so fast
hard to accept</i>. <o:p></o:p></span><br />
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 200%;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 200%; text-align: justify; text-indent: .5in;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 200%;">Standing, I dropped the quilt in the
rocker. Out of the bedroom, down the
hall, through the apartment’s living room French doors, and onto the patio I
went in search of insight. I stood still
wishing the sunrise could erase the day before.
Would also lift the dense murkiness I felt clogged my mind.<o:p></o:p></span><br />
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 200%;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 200%; text-align: justify; text-indent: .5in;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 200%;">Pulling my robe tighter and holding
the half-empty coffee mug I paced among the plants and potted trees. Stroking their shriveled leaves I promised
them, “Don’t worry. Pretty soon I will
bring you in. I’m sorry I'm such a
procrastinator. But look at me. Sorry.
You can't choose your parents,” I apologized. Because the sad truth was and is: <i>I began
to battle my ability to care for me</i>.<o:p></o:p></span><br />
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 200%;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 200%; text-align: justify; text-indent: .5in;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 200%;">That admission slumped me back
against the short brick wall. I stared
blindly inside my apartment defeated.
Weary. In need of a rebirth. Though, <i>if I go, </i>I thought, <i>how do
I make Madame understand?</i> again my main concern.</span><br />
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 200%;"> <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 200%; text-align: justify; text-indent: .5in;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 200%;">After a few chilly minutes, the
morning breeze trailed the sheers behind me into the living-room. Nature quickly aired out the apartment, but
neglected my brain. Returning to the
bedroom, I made the bed to occupy my hands, when my eye caught sight of Mom’s
stationary lying on the end table. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 200%; text-align: justify; text-indent: .5in;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 200%;">Remembering how the letter,
especially Mom’s invite, uplifted me before, I thought: <i>Hey!
Maybe it’ll work again</i>.</span><br />
<span style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 200%; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 200%; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">Picking up the page, I reread it
slowly, my lips only mouthing the words, meaning to skip over the news about
Steve. But I </span><span style="line-height: 32px; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">couldn't</span><span style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 200%; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">, since Mom’s sadness, her loneliness rose from
the page. </span><i style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 200%; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">Yes, Mom needs me now, </i><span style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 200%; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">I
reasoned. </span><i style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 200%; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">If I build a strong bond
with her, that could satisfy Madame’s desire for me to have family, </i><span style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 200%; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">I
thought—knowing it won’t.</span><br />
<span style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 200%; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 200%; text-align: justify; text-indent: .5in;">
<i><span style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 200%;">Madame </span><span style="line-height: 32px;">won't</span><span style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 200%;"> be happy</span></i><span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 200%;">.
<i>She wanted me mature and independent there in New York, in Seneca’s
world</i>—a desire obviously now dead to me, especially since I felt a need for
a Mom.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 200%; text-align: justify; text-indent: .5in;">
<i><span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 200%;">So why hesitate? </span></i><span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 200%;">I wondered; knowing for sure the
answer.<o:p></o:p></span><br />
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 200%;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 200%; text-align: justify; text-indent: .5in;">
<i><span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 200%;">Madame</span></i><span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 200%;">.
Being my guardian when no one else wanted me makes me want, . . .<i>No</i>.
I <i>need her approval not her
displeasure</i>. Remembering Madame’s
words; “Diamond, Crystal can never be a good mother to you. She does not have the motherly emotional
attachment that a daughter needs;” I'm torn.
I feel that Mom deserves the opportunity to plead her defense. Her letter said as much.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 200%; text-align: justify; text-indent: .5in;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 200%;">Sprawled like flaccid spent spaghetti
across the bed, I stared at the high ceiling.
I agonized and vacillated. Yet
from somewhere came the ability to make a decision. I thought:<o:p></o:p></span><br />
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 200%;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<i><span style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 200%;">The bad feelings between Mom and Madame can’t matter to me. I need them both. Madame will just have to understand. . . .At
least, I hope she will. Maybe she </span><span style="line-height: 32px;">won't</span><span style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 200%;"> boot me</span></i><span style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 200%;"> <i>completely out of her life, like she did Mom</i>.<o:p></o:p></span><br />
<div style="line-height: 200%;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 200%;"><br /></span></div>
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 200%; text-align: justify; text-indent: .5in;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 200%;">Rolling over to the edge of the bed,
I say, “No she won't,” hoping the words spoken aloud will give it power. Though, the question, <i>Madame still loves me, right?</i> betrays me. Shows my lack of conviction.<o:p></o:p></span><br />
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 200%;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 200%; text-align: justify; text-indent: .5in;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 200%;">I try again. “She'll forgive me. She'll understand,” I voice sitting up,
planting my feet firmly. I enumerate the
reasons why, stalled at number one until optimism rears its hopeful head.<o:p></o:p></span><br />
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 200%;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 200%; text-align: justify; text-indent: .5in;">
<i><span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 200%;">Maybe she’ll see the success of Mom’s and my relationship and it’ll
inspire her to bridge their gap</span></i><span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 200%;">. <i>Yes. That’s what’s going to
happen. . . .Right? </i>I asked then hanging over the bed’s edge. Doubled over and sickened by the debating, I
say, “Believe, Diamond! Just believe!”
because the answer lies in success.<o:p></o:p></span><br />
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 200%;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 200%; text-align: justify; text-indent: .5in;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 200%;">“First succeed in mending the
rift.” It’ll speak louder than words.<o:p></o:p></span><br />
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 200%;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 200%; text-align: justify; text-indent: .5in;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 200%;">With that statement spoken, I shout
to Teddy, “I'm going to Chicago!” tossing him in the air. Intimidation now dead in the brightly lit
room.<o:p></o:p></span><br />
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 200%;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 200%; text-align: justify; text-indent: .5in;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 200%;">Then suddenly, I jumped. A double “peal!” had Teddy head first on the
floor at my feet.<o:p></o:p></span><br />
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 200%;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 200%; text-align: justify; text-indent: .5in;">
<i><span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 200%;">The phone this early?<o:p></o:p></span></i><br />
<i><span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 200%;"><br /></span></i></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 200%; text-align: justify; text-indent: .5in;">
<i><span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 200%;">Madame!?<o:p></o:p></span></i><br />
<i><span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 200%;"><br /></span></i></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 200%; text-align: justify; text-indent: .5in;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 200%;">Lifting Teddy, I retrieve the
receiver next to me on the end table.
“Hello?” my voice small.<o:p></o:p></span><br />
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 200%;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 200%; text-align: justify; text-indent: .5in;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 200%;">“Diamond? This is Crystal. . . your . . .your Mother. .
. .How are you?” she asks. She still
sounded faint as I remembered.<o:p></o:p></span><br />
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 200%;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 200%; text-align: justify; text-indent: .5in;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 200%;">“Mom? . . . .Oh, Mom! Mom. . . . .I’m fine. Fine. . . .Wow! This is a surprise. It’s good to hear your voice,” I said
straining to hear.<o:p></o:p></span><br />
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 200%;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 200%; text-align: justify; text-indent: .5in;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 200%;">The clock on the end table read six
a.m. I thought, <i>that’s five a.m. Chicago time</i>.
Now sitting rigid on the bed, Teddy now on my lap, I stroke his wounded
head with one hand, while steeling myself not to sound like a bumbling
idiot.</span><br />
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 200%;"> <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 200%; text-align: justify; text-indent: .5in;">
<i><span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 200%;">What’s the matter with me?. . . Why
am I so nervous?. . . It’s okay; it’s Mom</span></i><span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 200%;">.<o:p></o:p></span><br />
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 200%;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 200%; text-align: justify; text-indent: .5in;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 200%;">“I was just thinking about you. I got your letter,” I continued, swallowing
hard. <i>Me</i>—who sometimes can't shut
up—<i>speechless?<o:p></o:p></i></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 200%; text-align: justify; text-indent: .5in;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 200%;">“I'm glad… that’s why I called. I'm sorry it took so long.”</span><br />
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 200%;"> <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 200%;">After a slight pause she continues,
“Diamond, I’m worried. I </span><span style="line-height: 32px;">hadn't</span><span style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 200%;"> heard
from you. You are coming aren't
you? I saw your friend Octavia. I </span><span style="line-height: 32px;">didn't</span><span style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 200%;"> even recognize her. Anyway, I told her you were coming. You will won't you? Promise me. . . . I'll pay for the ticket.”<o:p></o:p></span><br />
<span style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 200%;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 200%; text-align: justify; text-indent: .5in;">
<i><span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 200%;">How could I not come?</span></i><br />
<i><span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 200%;"> <o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 200%; text-align: justify; text-indent: .5in;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 200%;">“Oh yes, Mom. I'm definitely coming. And Mom,” my eyes leaked and my voice
squeaked, “I'm so sorry about Steve.”</span><br />
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 200%;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 200%; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">“Yes.
Yes, Diamond. It’s sad, but. . .
.but </span><span style="line-height: 32px; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">I've</span><span style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 200%; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;"> got you now, haven't I?” she asks, quickly, her voice low.</span><br />
<span style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 200%; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 200%; text-align: justify; text-indent: .5in;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 200%;">This question with her personal
invite reconfirms my decision. It
snickered at today’s indecisiveness. I
exclaim, “Yes, Mom. You still have me. .
. .And thank-you.”<o:p></o:p></span><br />
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 200%;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 200%; text-align: justify; text-indent: .5in;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 200%;">No reply.<o:p></o:p></span><br />
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 200%;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 200%; text-align: justify; text-indent: .5in;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 200%;">Thinking, this is probably a bit
overwhelming for her too, I continue with, “Mom, when do you want me to come?”<o:p></o:p></span><br />
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 200%;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 200%; text-align: justify; text-indent: .5in;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 200%;">“Soon,” she says without a moment
mores hesitation. “As soon as you can, .
. . .dear.” <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 200%; text-align: justify; text-indent: .5in;">
<i><span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 200%;">Dear?</span></i><br />
<span style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 200%; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 200%; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">“Okay, Mom. </span><span style="line-height: 32px; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">I've</span><span style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 200%; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;"> got a couple of things to wrap up here first—.”</span><br />
<span style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 200%; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 200%; text-align: justify; text-indent: .5in;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 200%;">“Can you book the ticket for
Friday? Is that too soon? That would be perfect for me. Is that okay?” she rushes on.<o:p></o:p></span><br />
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 200%;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 200%; text-align: justify; text-indent: .5in;">
<i><span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 200%;">This Friday? </span></i><span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 200%;">My mind balked, but my lips committed, “Sure, Mom. That’ll be okay.”<o:p></o:p></span><br />
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 200%;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 200%; text-align: justify; text-indent: .5in;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 200%;">“Good. I’m so excited, Diamond. Call me with the flight information,
okay. Here’s my number—.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 200%; text-align: justify; text-indent: .5in;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 200%;">After writing down her number on a
piece of paper I hung up, wondering about the Friday booking—that day being
Tuesday. But I assured myself; <i>it’ll
be okay</i>. Two weeks. I’d visit for two weeks.</span><br />
<span style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 200%;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 200%;">“Maybe, that won’t be overstaying my
welcome,” I thought aloud.</span><br />
<span style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 200%;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 200%; text-align: justify; text-indent: .5in;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 200%;">Happy, with resolve now strengthened,
I started preparations for my return to Chicago. First, I headed to the living
room; bouncing down on the sofa, ready to make a list of everyone I needed to
inform of my vacation.<o:p></o:p></span><br />
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 200%;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 200%; text-align: justify; text-indent: .5in;">
<i><span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 200%;">On second hand, </span></i><span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 200%;">I reconsidered; <i>I’ll just let them
think this is a business outing</i>. “It
is. It’s my personal business,” I
shouted, jumping up to get busy.</span><br />
<span style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 200%; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 200%; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">Gathering cleaning equipment from
underneath the kitchen sink, I strategized my assault on the apartment. Since I </span><span style="line-height: 32px; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">hadn't</span><span style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 200%; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;"> cleaned in weeks, dust, layers
of it covered the furniture. But, it </span><span style="line-height: 32px; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">didn't</span><span style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 200%; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;"> matter. That day was restoration
day. I turned on my stereo. Flung open the kitchen window, and sent jazz
into the world and motivation to my cleaning.</span><br />
<span style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 200%; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 200%; text-align: justify; text-indent: .5in;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 200%;">Hours passed.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 200%; text-align: justify; text-indent: .5in;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 200%;">Pleasantly tired, relaxing on the
sofa with a cold glass of apple juice, I noticed the blinking red light on my
answering machine. I thought: <i>Oh,
it’ll wait</i>.</span><br />
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 200%;"><br /></span>
<br />
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<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 200%;"></span><br /></div>
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 200%;"><o:p></o:p></span><br /></div>
Lucretia McCloudhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07064997700656978645noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3766019299562717358.post-35825790843006328592015-11-17T09:59:00.000-08:002015-11-17T09:59:55.613-08:00Is She On To Me? ... Chapter Twelve<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 200%; text-align: center; text-indent: .5in;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 200%; mso-bidi-font-weight: bold;"><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS", sans-serif;">Chapter Twelve<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 200%; text-align: justify; text-indent: .5in; text-justify: inter-ideograph;">
<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS", sans-serif;"></span><br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 200%; text-align: justify; text-indent: .5in; text-justify: inter-ideograph;">
<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS", sans-serif;"><i><span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 200%;">Central Park? How did I end up here? </span></i><span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 200%;">I questioned<i>.</i><o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 200%; text-align: justify; text-indent: .5in; text-justify: inter-ideograph;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 200%;"><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS", sans-serif;">I felt groggy; attempted to focus on door-manned apartment buildings and
parked limos whizzing by. A fleeting
street sign read: 67th near one of my favorite mosaics: John Lennon’s Imagine .
. . .<i>In Strawberry Field? </i><o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 200%; text-align: justify; text-indent: .5in; text-justify: inter-ideograph;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 200%;"><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS", sans-serif;">I scooted to the other side of the taxi as we approached the vicinity of <i>Heckscher’s
playground? What’s this? </i>I wondered<i>. What happened to Brooklyn? . . . .Where’s
Gracie’s cafe, . . . The used books store?. . . .Why are we near the
playground?<o:p></o:p></i></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 200%; text-align: justify; text-indent: .5in; text-justify: inter-ideograph;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 200%;"><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS", sans-serif;">Okay. I did admit to making that
trip to the park often. It was the
“little people.” The children. I loved it when they swung; they
inspired. Fearless, though squealing,
high they’d fly, frightfully high, I mentally right along with them sailing.<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 200%; text-align: justify; text-indent: .5in; text-justify: inter-ideograph;">
<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS", sans-serif;"><i><span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 200%;">But right then I hated that image</span></i><span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 200%;">. The thought of them
soaring close by made my insides curl. That
reaction was alien but intense. So
intense that I was finally fully awake.
So real I felt the need to spit.<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS", sans-serif;"><i><span style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 200%;">What was wrong with this driver?
Where was he taking me? I </span><span style="line-height: 32px;">didn't</span><span style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 200%;"> mention the playground, did I?</span></i><span style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 200%;"> I questioned.<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS", sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 200%;">Yes, with my mind’s eye </span><i><span style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 200%;">I saw them, the children, </span><span style="line-height: 32px;">naive</span><span style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 200%;"> and happy, </span></i><span style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 200%;">very
naive and so very happy they were—occasionally </span><i style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 200%;">me as a child</i><span style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 200%;">; I was
reminded.<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 200%; text-align: justify; text-indent: .5in; text-justify: inter-ideograph;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 200%;"><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS", sans-serif;">But the driver was clueless about my routine or my thoughts, as he should
be. All he needed to know was the way
back to Brooklyn. How to swing around a
corner into Brooklyn Heights.<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 200%; text-align: justify; text-indent: .5in; text-justify: inter-ideograph;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 200%;"><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS", sans-serif;">I met his black eyes in the mirror; demanding, “Driver, let me out.”<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS", sans-serif;"><i style="line-height: 200%;"><span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 200%;">Scenes; I hate them. </span></i><span style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 200%;">But I </span><span style="line-height: 32px;">wouldn't</span><span style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 200%;"> be taken advantage of.<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 200%; text-align: justify; text-indent: .5in; text-justify: inter-ideograph;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 200%;"><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS", sans-serif;">I remember thinking, S<i>ome people. . . .That’s okay, he can forget about
it. . . . I’m not paying for this ride; I’ll take another taxi.<o:p></o:p></i></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 200%; text-align: justify; text-indent: .5in; text-justify: inter-ideograph;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 200%;"><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS", sans-serif;">“Miss, I take you home,” the driver finally responded.<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 200%; text-align: justify; text-indent: .5in; text-justify: inter-ideograph;">
<i><span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 200%;"><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS", sans-serif;">When? In his own good time?<o:p></o:p></span></span></i></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 200%; text-align: justify; text-indent: .5in; text-justify: inter-ideograph;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 200%;"><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS", sans-serif;">I answered: “Did you say ‘home’?
This is not my home. . . .I said, ‘Brooklyn.’ Brooklyn Heights is where I live. . . .
Stop. I want to get out,” I insisted
looking outside the window for a place for him to pull over. I was fed up.<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 200%; text-align: justify; text-indent: .5in; text-justify: inter-ideograph;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 200%;"><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS", sans-serif;">There seemed to be a control issue going on in my life. Everyone, it seemed, wanted to dictate what I
should do.<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 200%; text-align: justify; text-indent: .5in; text-justify: inter-ideograph;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 200%;"><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS", sans-serif;">“No, Diamond. I said, ‘I’ll take
you home,’” repeats the driver.<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 200%; text-align: justify; text-indent: .5in; text-justify: inter-ideograph;">
<i><span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 200%;"><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS", sans-serif;">Diamond?<o:p></o:p></span></span></i></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS", sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 200%;">Slowly I turned back towards the mirror, shaking, because . . . she said,
“Diamond.” </span><i><span style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 200%;">It </span><span style="line-height: 32px;">couldn't</span><span style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 200%;"> be</span></i><span style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 200%;">. But the look
in the mirror showed eyes no longer black but hazel—my eyes. Madame’s eyes. Silent, I sat frozen. Those eyes dropped a cage of guilt around
me. <o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 200%; text-align: justify; text-indent: .5in; text-justify: inter-ideograph;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 200%;"><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS", sans-serif;">Cornered, I retaliated. <i>What
do I have to feel guilty about? She left
me alone. Now she wants to drive me
again? </i>Warmed by that anger I
wondered, <i>where does she think she’s taking me?</i><o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS", sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 200%;">Madame continued to steer, eyes shifting back and forth between my reflection
in the mirror and the road. The car moved
steadily through the traffic. Then she
became solely on me. The car drove
itself, yet she </span><span style="line-height: 32px;">didn't</span><span style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 200%;"> utter a word. I
tried to blink to break the intensity, but my eyes </span><span style="line-height: 32px;">wouldn't</span><span style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 200%;"> shut as we locked
in a battle of wills.<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 200%; text-align: justify; text-indent: .5in; text-justify: inter-ideograph;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 200%;"><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS", sans-serif;">Finally my anger thawed that guilt into a swimming pool into which I
leaped; twisting; falling in slow motion; then—Voila! I was back in . . . .Central Park? Yes.
Alone. Again. Lonely in all eight hundred and forty-three
acres as the paths swarmed with high energy and vitality. People bicycled; rode roller-blades; jogged,
while I watched wishing they’d just sit.
Their activity depleted what was left of my energy. Though, more-than-likely, it was the then
oppressive weight and heat of my suede coat and my leather vise-like boots
sensitive to every small rock and crevice beneath my soles. I remember thinking that a snail would
snicker as I tipped along that trail. Searched
for a place to rest. <o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 200%; text-align: justify; text-indent: .5in; text-justify: inter-ideograph;">
<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS", sans-serif;"><i><span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 200%;">Yes; rest. </span></i><span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 200%; mso-bidi-font-style: italic;">That was
all I really wanted; all I really needed</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 200%;">. To regroup after
that difficult episode. <i>What was Madame thinking? To just pick up where she left off?</i><o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS", sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 200%;">Looking across the park, I bypassed natural boulders, searching for and
spotting the large weeping willow. With
extra effort I managed to drop to its base grateful for that moment. Dispersed </span><span style="line-height: 32px;">sun-rays</span><span style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 200%;"> highlight roused dust
particles making the spot unearthly; ethereal.
Although the trunk and its shade shrouding me in tranquility and
serenity, I shivered despite the beautiful mounted horses patrolling the park. </span><i style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 200%;">My fear? … </i><span style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 200%;">Enjoying too much. Like a nip from a snake’s fang circumstances
change.<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS", sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 200%;">But again I coached, </span><i style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 200%;">come on, Diamond; enjoy the moment</i><span style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 200%;">. So I blessed the wind sending forth those
sweet innocent </span><span style="line-height: 32px;">whispering</span><span style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 200%;">. Blessed the
fact that they provided a calm distraction despite a world warring for fuel,
democracy or both. And nature wreaking
its own turmoil. I gazed up in
fascination watching the tree’s branches flow over and around me, soft and
gentle. Its limbs deflected the strength
of the sun’s warmth. Tendrils of my hair
floated delicately across my face tickling the way a child draws a piece of
string along your skin.<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 200%; text-align: justify; text-indent: .5in; text-justify: inter-ideograph;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 200%;"><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS", sans-serif;">Smiling, I began to unwind. Thankful; thinking, <i>this feels nice</i>. When small at times I felt this way. Cozy.
Safe beneath a towering shelter.
But as I sat the sun faded as I complained, <i>I just arrived!</i> <i>I knew it was too good to last,</i> for the
shadowed darkness moved in rapidly engulfing the peaceful atmosphere.<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS", sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 200%;">In cold and fear, uncontrollable trembles rattled my body. Guttural sounds, harsh and raspy like the
death rattle of an old man, replaced the pleasant </span><span style="line-height: 32px;">whispering</span><span style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 200%;">. And pain, piercing pain, inflicted by
whipping branches shot across my body. The
once gentle branches now snapping, biting boughs.<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 200%; text-align: justify; text-indent: .5in; text-justify: inter-ideograph;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 200%;"><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS", sans-serif;">I tried to protect myself, but the limbs cracked sharp and repeated
against my hands. I tried unsuccessfully
hiding them, eventually touching something … <i>sticky? … </i>I thought,<i> Blood?<o:p></o:p></i></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 200%; text-align: justify; text-indent: .5in; text-justify: inter-ideograph;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 200%;"><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS", sans-serif;">“Blood!” I screamed, voiceless
repeated screams, my throat scratchy and dry.
But sweat poured from my skin. Plastered
my curls to my face. I shielded my head
and hands attempting to run. But my
legs—weak traitors, buckled. Flung me
forward. Spindly vines like fingers
twisted around my throat squeezing tight, then tighter. I tore at the stems, breathing my first
aim. Finally I managed a mangled,
“Someone help me,” as I grasp for life. “Please
someone,” I begged, staring into the darkness, wondering, … <i>where is
everybody?</i><o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 200%; text-align: justify; text-indent: .5in; text-justify: inter-ideograph;">
<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS", sans-serif;"><i><span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 200%;">Gone</span></i><span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 200%;">, the
obvious answer.<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS", sans-serif;"><i style="line-height: 200%;"><span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 200%;">I’m on my own? </span></i><span style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 200%;">I </span><span style="line-height: 32px;">couldn't</span><span style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 200%;"> believe, still clawing to tear free from the vines. Again I attempted to run. But the snarled branches seized my arms and
legs. Tripped me.<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 200%; text-align: justify; text-indent: .5in; text-justify: inter-ideograph;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 200%;"><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS", sans-serif;">“Madame! Madame!” I called
out. “Help me! Please help me. . . .” my cries cut short as
damp clammy leaves gripped tight my lips.
They stopped my cries and again tried to smother me. And willowy vines camouflaging daylight
continued to thwart my freedom.<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 200%; text-align: justify; text-indent: .5in; text-justify: inter-ideograph;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 200%;"><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS", sans-serif;">Faceless death bound me. But I battled
fiercely; at the same time whimpering, thinking: <i>What a baby I am. </i> I exerted one last desperate burst of strength
and—.<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 200%; text-align: justify; text-indent: .5in; text-justify: inter-ideograph;">
<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS", sans-serif;"><i><span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 200%;">Free? </span></i><span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 200%;">. . .
.I’d escaped! My breathing labored and
eyes not quite focused, I crawled exhausted for the bike path out of the park. Terrified in the darkness—still gasping and
panting—I spotted a small red light among the dark shadows, making out what
look like… <i>Numbers?<o:p></o:p></i></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 200%; text-align: justify; text-indent: .5in; text-justify: inter-ideograph;">
<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS", sans-serif;"><i><span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 200%;">Yes</span></i><span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 200%;">. 3.
0. 0.<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 200%; text-align: justify; text-indent: .5in; text-justify: inter-ideograph;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 200%;"><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS", sans-serif;">I refocused.<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 200%; text-align: justify; text-indent: .5in; text-justify: inter-ideograph;">
<i><span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 200%;"><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS", sans-serif;">3:00 a.m.!<o:p></o:p></span></span></i></div>
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<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 200%; text-align: justify; text-indent: .5in; text-justify: inter-ideograph;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 200%;"><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS", sans-serif;">I fell back against the sheets; stunned and totally spent, yet terribly relieved. I thought, <i>Thank God</i> <i>I am home</i>.<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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Lucretia McCloudhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07064997700656978645noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3766019299562717358.post-59407570792899605602015-08-29T14:50:00.000-07:002015-08-29T14:54:14.856-07:00I Am 'Just Saying'...<br />
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<a href="http://vigortality.blogspot.com/?m=1" style="color: black; text-decoration: none;">Livid But Live</a></h1>
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Livid when it comes to injustices! But grateful to be alive! Especially in these increasingly worsening times. "You're kidding!" you say. No. You've heard: "It was the best of times. It was the worst of times." Well, it is the same today. Follow along as I show you why.</div>
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Friday, February 27, 2015</h2>
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<h3 class="post-title entry-title" itemprop="name" style="font-size: 24px; margin: 20px 0px 0px; position: relative;">
I Am 'Just Saying'...</h3>
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I Am<br />
'Just Saying'<br />
<br />
By Seah Greenhorn<br />
(with copyright)<br />
<br />
<br />
What you do<br />
<i>Does</i><br />
affect us.<br />
<br />
If you dress<br />
totally 'sexy'<br />
<br />
or bare it all;<br />
<br />
but he can't find <i>you</i><br />
<i><br /></i>or give<br />
<i>you</i><br />
a call;<br />
<br />
What exactly do you think<br />
he's gonna do?<br />
<br />
Read a book?<br />
Call his guy friend?<br />
<br />
Jump in his car<br />
just to give it a spin?<br />
<br />
Or will he prowl the streets<br />
With a itch in hand<br />
<br />
Looking for<br />
a willing/unwilling<br />
#victim<br />
<br />
to supply #on-demand?<br />
<br />
Come on girls...<br />
Give us a break.<br />
<br />
If you 'rev' them up<br />
but don't participate<br />
<br />
you're an accomplice<br />
to #malice<br />
against your 'fella' mate.<br />
<br />
Don't take this<br />
as an opportunity<br />
"to #fling<br />
some 'hate.'"<br />
<br />
We just want to curb<br />
this violence<br />
<br />
that 'Too #Sexy'<br />
<br />
perpetuates<br />
<br />
against<br />
<br />
sisters,<br />
<br />
daughters,<br />
<br />
even mothers.<br />
<br />
Think about us<br />
<br />
just trying<br />
to navigate<br />
<br />
these daily streets,<br />
among all this<br />
female hate.<br />
<br />
We too need to<br />
carve out<br />
a living<br />
<br />
for our<br />
families<br />
sake.<br />
<br />
A little<br />
<i>less</i><br />
flesh,<br />
<br />
Please.<br />
<br />
Or for<br />
Us<br />
<br />
it's<br />
<br />
Too Late.<br />
<br />
I Am<br />
'Just Saying.'<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
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<iframe frameborder="0" id="google_top_static_frame" name="google_top_static_frame" src="http://googleads.g.doubleclick.net/pagead/blank.html" style="color: #666666; font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Trebuchet, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; height: 0px; position: absolute; width: 0px;"></iframe><iframe id="oauth2relay372882008" name="oauth2relay372882008" src="https://accounts.google.com/o/oauth2/postmessageRelay?parent=http%3A%2F%2Fvigortality.blogspot.com#rpctoken=368581086&forcesecure=1" style="color: #666666; font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Trebuchet, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; height: 1px; position: absolute; top: -100px; width: 1px;" tabindex="-1"></iframe>Lucretia McCloudhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07064997700656978645noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3766019299562717358.post-25779456404454029682015-08-27T23:20:00.000-07:002015-09-03T10:47:44.227-07:00FebruaryFEBRUARY<br />
<span style="line-height: 1.8;">by </span><a class="u nocolor" data-id="5723545" href="http://allpoetry.com/Seah%20Greenhorn" style="background-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box; color: inherit !important; text-decoration: none;">Seah Greenhorn</a><br />
<span style="line-height: 1.8;">(Poem with copyright)</span><br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjbn0ZbhGoi1ZUSkGn1f5cLpbLs8J3FNosYd87BMIu95D2WYb-x11_lrr3jQ3OLpU7PJCoSiPxlV0bKW6OBk06kATWtdKFRvKgygV-nHkKswuRI-XC553yZhyphenhyphenry0Y61xxKl0DXmY1KyE08s/s1600/d8d1544cadbd15240af3e18171a15ff9.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjbn0ZbhGoi1ZUSkGn1f5cLpbLs8J3FNosYd87BMIu95D2WYb-x11_lrr3jQ3OLpU7PJCoSiPxlV0bKW6OBk06kATWtdKFRvKgygV-nHkKswuRI-XC553yZhyphenhyphenry0Y61xxKl0DXmY1KyE08s/s320/d8d1544cadbd15240af3e18171a15ff9.jpg" width="190" /></a></div>
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<div class="poem_body" style="box-sizing: border-box;">
A pulsating dark<br />
demonic rhythm;<br />
<br style="box-sizing: border-box;" />
yet glorious<br />
as northern lights<br />
<br style="box-sizing: border-box;" />
dancing<br />
hither then dither.<br />
<br style="box-sizing: border-box;" />
These I beautifully suffer<br />
as silent hymns--<br />
<br style="box-sizing: border-box;" />
a dirge. My urgings to<br />
peek<br />
<br style="box-sizing: border-box;" />
the exhilarating<br />
heights<br />
<br style="box-sizing: border-box;" />
of forever love<br />
<br style="box-sizing: border-box;" />
plummeted<br />
into valleys steep.<br />
<br style="box-sizing: border-box;" />
The vivid visuals<br />
of orange<br />
<br style="box-sizing: border-box;" />
and other range<br />
<br style="box-sizing: border-box;" />
of cascading colors<br />
<br style="box-sizing: border-box;" />
Lost<br />
<br style="box-sizing: border-box;" />
in the<br />
swirlings of<br />
my crippling despair.<br />
<br style="box-sizing: border-box;" />
I inhale sharply<br />
the<br />
piercings<br />
<br style="box-sizing: border-box;" />
as the pressure<br />
from deep<br />
<br style="box-sizing: border-box;" />
submergings<br />
<br style="box-sizing: border-box;" />
explode<br />
this regrettably<br />
enlarged<br />
heart.<br />
<br style="box-sizing: border-box;" />
The supreme<br />
red drippings<br />
<br style="box-sizing: border-box;" />
from past dilated pupils<br />
<br style="box-sizing: border-box;" />
mingling the blues<br />
of my spirit<br />
<br style="box-sizing: border-box;" />
sprout royal purple<br />
<br style="box-sizing: border-box;" />
hues as pathetic<br />
<br style="box-sizing: border-box;" />
gurgles<br />
escape my throat.<br />
<br style="box-sizing: border-box;" />
I hope...<br />
yes wish<br />
<br style="box-sizing: border-box;" />
for freeing<br />
release of your<br />
drowning<br />
<br style="box-sizing: border-box;" />
apathy.<br />
<br style="box-sizing: border-box;" />
Once crazed<br />
I lazily sink dazed<br />
<br style="box-sizing: border-box;" />
hasty to end this<br />
lonely month<br />
<br style="box-sizing: border-box;" />
in which lovers<br />
gaze<br />
<br style="box-sizing: border-box;" />
over forgotten lunch<br />
too amorously near<br />
<br style="box-sizing: border-box;" />
for me to enviously peer.<br />
<br style="box-sizing: border-box;" />
February.<br />
<br style="box-sizing: border-box;" />
<br style="box-sizing: border-box;" />
<br style="box-sizing: border-box;" /></div>
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© Lucretia Mccloud, <abbr alt="Added August 27" class="tip timeago-automatic-refresh" style="border-bottom-width: 0px; box-sizing: border-box; color: inherit; cursor: default;" title="on 8 hours ago">8 hours ago</abbr><br />
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Best rhyming poem wins. 'Tis as simple as that.<br />
<br style="box-sizing: border-box;" />
<br style="box-sizing: border-box;" />
<br style="box-sizing: border-box;" />
It may be happy and uplifting, dark and gloomy, or anything in between.<br />
<br style="box-sizing: border-box;" />
<br style="box-sizing: border-box;" />
<br style="box-sizing: border-box;" />
YOUR CHALLENGE:<br />
<br style="box-sizing: border-box;" />
Include the words<br />
<br style="box-sizing: border-box;" />
.Orange<br />
<br style="box-sizing: border-box;" />
.Month<br />
<br style="box-sizing: border-box;" />
.Purple<br />
<br style="box-sizing: border-box;" />
.Rhythm<br />
<br style="box-sizing: border-box;" />
<br style="box-sizing: border-box;" />
<br style="box-sizing: border-box;" />
GOOD LUCK RHYMING WITH THOSE!</div>
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<a href="http://allpoetry.com/poems/about/Love" style="background-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box; color: inherit !important; text-decoration: none;">Love</a> • <a href="http://allpoetry.com/poems/about/Sad" style="background-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box; color: inherit !important; text-decoration: none;">Sad</a> • <a href="http://allpoetry.com/poems/about/Pain" style="background-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box; color: inherit !important; text-decoration: none;">Pain</a></div>
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</a><div class="userInfo" style="-webkit-box-direction: normal; -webkit-box-orient: vertical; -webkit-box-pack: center; display: flex; flex-direction: column; height: 60px; justify-content: center; margin-left: 60px; padding-left: 5px; position: relative;">
<h2 class="userProfileHeaderName" itemprop="name" style="font-size: 18px; margin: 0px 55px 0px 0px;">
<div class="userProfileHeaderNameInner" style="display: inline-block; overflow: hidden; text-overflow: ellipsis; white-space: nowrap;">
Lucretia McCloud</div>
</h2>
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@lucretiamccloud</div>
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<li class="websiteWrapper" style="display: inline; list-style: none; max-width: 200px; overflow: hidden; padding: 0px; text-overflow: ellipsis;"><a class="website" href="http://lividbutlive.blogspot.com/2015/01/photographs.html" itemprop="url" rel="nofollow" style="color: #9a9a9a; max-width: 200px; overflow: hidden; text-decoration: none; text-overflow: ellipsis;" target="_blank">lividbutlive.blogspot.com/2015/01/photographs.html </a></li>
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<button class="Button DropdownButton Module btn rounded userProfileMenu" data-element-type="57" style="background: linear-gradient(rgb(255, 255, 255), rgb(240, 240, 240)) rgb(240, 240, 240); border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; border: 1px solid rgb(204, 204, 204); color: #5f5f5f; cursor: pointer; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Helvetica, 'ヒラギノ角ゴ Pro W3', 'Hiragino Kaku Gothic Pro', メイリオ, Meiryo, 'MS Pゴシック', arial, sans-serif; font-weight: bold; margin: -17px 0px 0px; outline: none; padding: 7px 13px; position: absolute; right: 0px; text-shadow: rgb(255, 255, 255) 0px 1px; top: 30px; vertical-align: middle; white-space: nowrap;" type="button"><em style="background: url(https://s-passets-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/webapp/style/sprites/webapp-common-above_the_fold-2x-6bfc28da.png) -91px -142px / 214px 199px no-repeat; display: inline-block; height: 17px; outline: none; position: relative; vertical-align: middle; width: 28px;"></em><span class="accessibilityText" style="color: transparent; font-family: serif; font-size: 0px; font-weight: normal; line-height: 0; position: absolute; text-shadow: none;">User Menu</span></button></div>
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<div class="Module UserInfoBar centeredWithinWrapper infoBar gridWidth" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.0980392) 0px 2px 2px 0px, rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.0980392) 0px 1px 0px 0px; border-bottom-left-radius: 0px; border-bottom-right-radius: 0px; border-top-left-radius: 0px; border-top-right-radius: 0px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.0980392) 0px 2px 2px 0px, rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.0980392) 0px 1px 0px 0px; font-size: 11px; margin: 0px auto; padding: 0px; width: auto;">
<div class="divider centeredWithinWrapper gridWidth" style="margin: 0px auto; width: 350px;">
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<ul style="display: table; margin: auto; padding: 0px; table-layout: fixed; width: 480px;">
<li style="-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased; background-color: white; display: table-cell; float: none; line-height: 14px; list-style: none; margin-right: -1px; padding: 14px 0px; text-align: center;"><a class="active" href="https://www.pinterest.com/lucretiamccloud/boards/" style="-webkit-box-shadow: none; box-shadow: none; color: #717171; padding: 0px; text-decoration: none; width: auto;"><div class="BoardCount Module">
<span class="value" style="color: #bd081c; display: block; font-size: 16px; font-weight: bold; padding-bottom: 3px;">51</span><span class="label" style="color: #bd081c; display: block;">Boards</span></div>
</a></li>
<li style="-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased; background-color: white; display: table-cell; float: none; line-height: 14px; list-style: none; margin-right: -1px; padding: 14px 0px; text-align: center;"><a class="" href="https://www.pinterest.com/lucretiamccloud/pins/" style="-webkit-box-shadow: none; box-shadow: none; color: #717171; padding: 0px; text-decoration: none; width: auto;"><div class="Module PinCount">
<span class="value" style="color: #aaaaaa; display: block; font-size: 16px; font-weight: bold; padding-bottom: 3px;">24.5k</span><span class="label" style="color: #9a9a9a; display: block;">Pins</span></div>
</a></li>
<li style="-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased; background-color: white; display: table-cell; float: none; line-height: 14px; list-style: none; margin-right: -1px; padding: 14px 0px; text-align: center;"><a class="" href="https://www.pinterest.com/lucretiamccloud/likes/" style="-webkit-box-shadow: none; box-shadow: none; color: #717171; padding: 0px; text-decoration: none; width: auto;"><div class="LikeCount Module">
<span class="value" style="color: #aaaaaa; display: block; font-size: 16px; font-weight: bold; padding-bottom: 3px;">2.2k</span><span class="label" style="color: #9a9a9a; display: block;">Likes</span></div>
</a></li>
<li style="-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased; background-color: white; display: table-cell; float: none; line-height: 14px; list-style: none; margin-right: -1px; padding: 14px 0px; text-align: center;"><a class="" href="https://www.pinterest.com/lucretiamccloud/followers/" style="-webkit-box-shadow: none; box-shadow: none; color: #717171; padding: 0px; text-decoration: none; width: auto;"><div class="FollowerCount Module">
<span class="value" style="color: #aaaaaa; display: block; font-size: 16px; font-weight: bold; padding-bottom: 3px;">1.2k</span><span class="label" style="color: #9a9a9a; display: block;">Followers</span></div>
</a></li>
<li style="-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased; background-color: white; display: table-cell; float: none; line-height: 14px; list-style: none; margin-right: -1px; padding: 14px 0px; text-align: center;"><a class="" href="https://www.pinterest.com/lucretiamccloud/following/" style="-webkit-box-shadow: none; box-shadow: none; color: #717171; padding: 0px; text-decoration: none; width: auto;"><div class="FollowingCount Module">
<span class="value" style="color: #aaaaaa; display: block; font-size: 16px; font-weight: bold; padding-bottom: 3px;">1.1k</span><span class="label" style="color: #9a9a9a; display: block;">Following</span></div>
</a></li>
</ul>
</div>
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<div class="Module UserProfileContent">
<div class="Module UserBoards ownProfile" style="overflow-y: scroll;">
<div class="Grid Module" style="margin: 0px auto 38px; position: relative;">
<div class="GridItems Module centeredWithinWrapper fixedHeightLayout padItems ui-sortable" style="margin: 0px auto 10px; padding-bottom: 2px; position: relative; width: 360px;">
<div aria-disabled="true" class="item activeItem ui-draggable ui-draggable-disabled ui-state-disabled" style="-webkit-transform: translateZ(0px); float: left; margin: 10px 5px 0px; width: 170px;">
<a class="BoardCreateRep ModalTrigger Module" href="https://www.pinterest.com/lucretiamccloud/#" style="background: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.027451); border-bottom-left-radius: 6px; border-bottom-right-radius: 6px; border-top-left-radius: 6px; border-top-right-radius: 6px; border: 2px dashed rgb(187, 187, 187); box-sizing: border-box; color: #888888; cursor: pointer; display: block; font-size: 15px; font-weight: bold; height: 234px; position: relative; text-align: center; text-decoration: none; text-shadow: rgb(255, 255, 255) 0px 1px 1px; width: 170px;"><i style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgb(255, 255, 255) 0px 0px 2px inset; background: rgb(236, 236, 236); border-bottom-left-radius: 50%; border-bottom-right-radius: 50%; border-top-left-radius: 50%; border-top-right-radius: 50%; border: 1px solid rgb(207, 207, 207); bottom: 115px; box-shadow: rgb(255, 255, 255) 0px 0px 2px inset; height: 44px; left: 83px; margin-bottom: -8px; margin-left: -22px; position: absolute; width: 44px;"></i><span style="left: 0px; margin-top: 18px; position: absolute; right: 0px; top: 115px;">Create a board</span></a></div>
<div aria-disabled="true" class="item ui-draggable ui-draggable-disabled ui-state-disabled gridSortable" style="-webkit-transform: translateZ(0px); float: left; margin: 10px 5px 0px; width: 170px;">
<div class="Board Module boardCoverImage draggable noContext" data-component-type="1" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.219608) 0px 1px 2px 0px; background: rgb(255, 255, 255); border-bottom-left-radius: 6px; border-bottom-right-radius: 6px; border-top-left-radius: 6px; border-top-right-radius: 6px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.219608) 0px 1px 2px 0px; float: left; position: relative; width: 170px;">
<a class="boardLinkWrapper" data-element-type="36" href="https://www.pinterest.com/lucretiamccloud/forever-joyful-a-promise/" style="color: #555555; display: block; font-weight: bold; padding: 10px 10px 0px; position: relative; text-decoration: none;"><div class="boardName" style="-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased; font-size: 14px; height: auto; line-height: 18px; margin: 3px 1px 6px; overflow: hidden; position: relative; text-overflow: ellipsis; white-space: nowrap;">
<div class="BoardIcons Module pinCreate" style="display: inline-block; float: right; height: 16px;">
</div>
<div class="name" style="overflow: hidden; text-overflow: ellipsis;">
Forever Joyful--A Promise</div>
</div>
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<span class="hoverMask" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; -webkit-transition: background 0.04s linear; border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; bottom: 0px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; left: 0px; position: absolute; right: 0px; top: 0px; transition: background 0.04s linear; z-index: 100;"></span><img alt="Forever Joyful--A Promise / "A generation is going, and a generation is coming, but the earth remains forever." Eccl. 1:4...“Happy are the mild-tempered, since they will inherit the earth." Matt. 5:5..."But the meek will possess the earth, and they will find exquisite delight in the abundance of peace...The righteous will possess the earth, and they will live forever on it." Ps. 37:11, 29...“All those taking refuge in Jehovah will rejoice; to time indefinite they will cry out joyfully.” Ps. 5:11. / by Lucretia McCloud" class="boardCover" data-load-state="pending" src="https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/custom_covers/216x146/413205403250327489_1427916986.jpg" style="border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; border: 0px; clear: both; height: 101.38889px; max-width: 100%; vertical-align: middle; width: 150px;" /><span class="boardPinCount" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.2) 0px 0px 5px inset, rgba(255, 255, 255, 0.298039) 0px 1px 0px; -webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased; background-color: rgba(68, 68, 68, 0.701961); border-bottom-left-radius: 2px; border-bottom-right-radius: 2px; border-top-left-radius: 2px; border-top-right-radius: 2px; bottom: 3px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.2) 0px 0px 5px inset, rgba(255, 255, 255, 0.298039) 0px 1px 0px; color: white; left: 3px; padding: 3px 6px; position: absolute; text-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.701961) 0px -1px 0px;"><div class="Module PinCount">
<span class="pinIcon" style="background: url(https://s-passets-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/webapp/style/sprites/webapp-common-above_the_fold-2x-6bfc28da.png) -158px -130px / 214px 199px no-repeat; display: inline-block; height: 9px; margin-right: 3px; width: 7px;"></span>1,363</div>
</span></div>
<ul class="boardThumbs" style="margin: 4px 0px; padding: 0px;">
<li style="display: inline; float: left; height: 47.33333px; list-style: none; margin-left: 0px; padding: 0px; position: relative; width: 47.33333px;"><span class="hoverMask" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; -webkit-transition: background 0.04s linear; border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; bottom: 0px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; left: 0px; position: absolute; right: 0px; top: 0px; transition: background 0.04s linear; z-index: 100;"></span><img class="thumb" data-load-state="pending" src="https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/75x75/bd/55/a8/bd55a84c75b1c15518754e8e19f04268.jpg" style="border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; border: 0px; height: 47.33333px; max-width: 100%; vertical-align: middle; width: 47.33333px;" /></li>
<li style="display: inline; float: left; height: 47.33333px; list-style: none; margin-left: 4px; padding: 0px; position: relative; width: 47.33333px;"><span class="hoverMask" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; -webkit-transition: background 0.04s linear; border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; bottom: 0px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; left: 0px; position: absolute; right: 0px; top: 0px; transition: background 0.04s linear; z-index: 100;"></span><img class="thumb" data-load-state="pending" src="https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/75x75/c5/21/ab/c521ab51cc269abfb00a16be479c5b52.jpg" style="border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; border: 0px; height: 47.33333px; max-width: 100%; vertical-align: middle; width: 47.33333px;" /></li>
<li style="display: inline; float: left; height: 47.33333px; list-style: none; margin-left: 4px; padding: 0px; position: relative; width: 47.33333px;"><span class="hoverMask" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; -webkit-transition: background 0.04s linear; border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; bottom: 0px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; left: 0px; position: absolute; right: 0px; top: 0px; transition: background 0.04s linear; z-index: 100;"></span><img class="thumb" data-load-state="pending" src="https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/75x75/e4/75/f9/e475f9410a602a4e628a584845ab57e1.jpg" style="border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; border: 0px; height: 47.33333px; max-width: 100%; vertical-align: middle; width: 47.33333px;" /></li>
</ul>
</a><button class="Button Module ShowModalButton boardEditButton btn hasText rounded" style="background: linear-gradient(rgb(255, 255, 255), rgb(240, 240, 240)) rgb(240, 240, 240); border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; border: 1px solid rgb(204, 204, 204); color: #5f5f5f; cursor: pointer; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Helvetica, 'ヒラギノ角ゴ Pro W3', 'Hiragino Kaku Gothic Pro', メイリオ, Meiryo, 'MS Pゴシック', arial, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; font-weight: bold; margin: 0px 10px 10px; outline: none; padding: 7px 13px; position: relative; text-shadow: rgb(255, 255, 255) 0px 1px; vertical-align: middle; white-space: nowrap; width: 150px;" type="button"><span class="buttonText">Edit</span></button></div>
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<div class="Board Module boardCoverImage draggable noContext" data-component-type="1" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.219608) 0px 1px 2px 0px; background: rgb(255, 255, 255); border-bottom-left-radius: 6px; border-bottom-right-radius: 6px; border-top-left-radius: 6px; border-top-right-radius: 6px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.219608) 0px 1px 2px 0px; float: left; position: relative; width: 170px;">
<a class="boardLinkWrapper" data-element-type="36" href="https://www.pinterest.com/lucretiamccloud/imagine-yourself-in-the-promised-new-earth-coming-/" style="color: #555555; display: block; font-weight: bold; padding: 10px 10px 0px; position: relative; text-decoration: none;"><div class="boardName" style="-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased; font-size: 14px; height: auto; line-height: 18px; margin: 3px 1px 6px; overflow: hidden; position: relative; text-overflow: ellipsis; white-space: nowrap;">
<div class="BoardIcons Module pinCreate" style="display: inline-block; float: right; height: 16px;">
</div>
<div class="name" style="overflow: hidden; text-overflow: ellipsis;">
Imagine Yourself In the Promised New Earth Coming Soon!</div>
</div>
<div class="boardCoverWrapper" style="background-color: #eeeeee; clear: both; height: 101.38889px; overflow: hidden; position: relative; width: 150px;">
<span class="hoverMask" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; -webkit-transition: background 0.04s linear; border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; bottom: 0px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; left: 0px; position: absolute; right: 0px; top: 0px; transition: background 0.04s linear; z-index: 100;"></span><img alt="Imagine Yourself In the Promised New Earth Coming Soon! / "For look! I am creating new heavens and a New Earth; And the former things will not be called to mind, Nor will they come up into the heart." Isa. 65:17. "They will build houses and live in them, and they will plant vineyards and eat their fruitage. They will not toil for nothing, nor will they bear children for distress...The wolf and the lamb will feed together, the lion will eat straw just like the bull, and the serpent’s food will be dust...” says Jehovah." Isaiah 65:21-25 ...
/ by Lucretia McCloud" class="boardCover" data-load-state="pending" src="https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/custom_covers/216x146/413205403250372612_1427916891.jpg" style="border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; border: 0px; clear: both; height: 101.38889px; max-width: 100%; vertical-align: middle; width: 150px;" /><span class="boardPinCount" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.2) 0px 0px 5px inset, rgba(255, 255, 255, 0.298039) 0px 1px 0px; -webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased; background-color: rgba(68, 68, 68, 0.701961); border-bottom-left-radius: 2px; border-bottom-right-radius: 2px; border-top-left-radius: 2px; border-top-right-radius: 2px; bottom: 3px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.2) 0px 0px 5px inset, rgba(255, 255, 255, 0.298039) 0px 1px 0px; color: white; left: 3px; padding: 3px 6px; position: absolute; text-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.701961) 0px -1px 0px;"><div class="Module PinCount">
<span class="pinIcon" style="background: url(https://s-passets-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/webapp/style/sprites/webapp-common-above_the_fold-2x-6bfc28da.png) -158px -130px / 214px 199px no-repeat; display: inline-block; height: 9px; margin-right: 3px; width: 7px;"></span>1,019</div>
</span></div>
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Diamond's World</div>
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<span class="hoverMask" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; -webkit-transition: background 0.04s linear; border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; bottom: 0px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; left: 0px; position: absolute; right: 0px; top: 0px; transition: background 0.04s linear; z-index: 100;"></span><img alt="Diamond's World / Diamond Duprey's a 22 yrs old costume designer/jazz saxophonist of NYC's underground, recovering emotionally after her devastating confrontation with her father--a jazz pianist she searched out/found in a NYC club. Flee with her to Chicago to reconcile with her once alcoholic mom verbally/physically abusive, then mute for ten years. Novel: Is She On To Me? https://plus.google.com/b/101016374508867620754/app/basic/+SeahgreenhornBlogspot?cbp=gozm0ba9xhk8&sview=25&cid=5&soc-app=115&soc-platform=1 / by Lucretia McCloud" class="boardCover" data-load-state="pending" src="https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/custom_covers/216x146/413205403250415338_1427914943.jpg" style="border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; border: 0px; clear: both; height: 101.38889px; max-width: 100%; vertical-align: middle; width: 150px;" /><span class="boardPinCount" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.2) 0px 0px 5px inset, rgba(255, 255, 255, 0.298039) 0px 1px 0px; -webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased; background-color: rgba(68, 68, 68, 0.701961); border-bottom-left-radius: 2px; border-bottom-right-radius: 2px; border-top-left-radius: 2px; border-top-right-radius: 2px; bottom: 3px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.2) 0px 0px 5px inset, rgba(255, 255, 255, 0.298039) 0px 1px 0px; color: white; left: 3px; padding: 3px 6px; position: absolute; text-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.701961) 0px -1px 0px;"><div class="Module PinCount">
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Earth's Creation Declares God's Glory</div>
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<span class="hoverMask" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; -webkit-transition: background 0.04s linear; border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; bottom: 0px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; left: 0px; position: absolute; right: 0px; top: 0px; transition: background 0.04s linear; z-index: 100;"></span><img alt="Earth's Creation Declares God's Glory / "How many your works are, O Jehovah! You have made all of them in wisdom. The earth is full of what you have made." Psalm 104:24, 25. / by Lucretia McCloud" class="boardCover" data-load-state="pending" src="https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/custom_covers/216x146/413205403250356778_1427918330.jpg" style="border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; border: 0px; clear: both; height: 101.38889px; max-width: 100%; vertical-align: middle; width: 150px;" /><span class="boardPinCount" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.2) 0px 0px 5px inset, rgba(255, 255, 255, 0.298039) 0px 1px 0px; -webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased; background-color: rgba(68, 68, 68, 0.701961); border-bottom-left-radius: 2px; border-bottom-right-radius: 2px; border-top-left-radius: 2px; border-top-right-radius: 2px; bottom: 3px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.2) 0px 0px 5px inset, rgba(255, 255, 255, 0.298039) 0px 1px 0px; color: white; left: 3px; padding: 3px 6px; position: absolute; text-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.701961) 0px -1px 0px;"><div class="Module PinCount">
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Happiness is Within Your Grasp Even Now</div>
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<div class="boardCoverWrapper" style="background-color: #eeeeee; clear: both; height: 101.38889px; overflow: hidden; position: relative; width: 150px;">
<span class="hoverMask" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; -webkit-transition: background 0.04s linear; border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; bottom: 0px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; left: 0px; position: absolute; right: 0px; top: 0px; transition: background 0.04s linear; z-index: 100;"></span><img alt="Happiness is Within Your Grasp Even Now / "‘There is more happiness in giving than there is in receiving.’” Acts 20:35..."Give thanks to Jehovah, for he is good; His loyal love endures forever." 1 Chronicles 16:34. / by Lucretia McCloud" class="boardCover" data-load-state="pending" src="https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/custom_covers/216x146/413205403250323327_1427917240.jpg" style="border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; border: 0px; clear: both; height: 101.38889px; max-width: 100%; vertical-align: middle; width: 150px;" /><span class="boardPinCount" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.2) 0px 0px 5px inset, rgba(255, 255, 255, 0.298039) 0px 1px 0px; -webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased; background-color: rgba(68, 68, 68, 0.701961); border-bottom-left-radius: 2px; border-bottom-right-radius: 2px; border-top-left-radius: 2px; border-top-right-radius: 2px; bottom: 3px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.2) 0px 0px 5px inset, rgba(255, 255, 255, 0.298039) 0px 1px 0px; color: white; left: 3px; padding: 3px 6px; position: absolute; text-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.701961) 0px -1px 0px;"><div class="Module PinCount">
<span class="pinIcon" style="background: url(https://s-passets-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/webapp/style/sprites/webapp-common-above_the_fold-2x-6bfc28da.png) -158px -130px / 214px 199px no-repeat; display: inline-block; height: 9px; margin-right: 3px; width: 7px;"></span>440</div>
</span></div>
<ul class="boardThumbs" style="margin: 4px 0px; padding: 0px;">
<li style="display: inline; float: left; height: 47.33333px; list-style: none; margin-left: 0px; padding: 0px; position: relative; width: 47.33333px;"><span class="hoverMask" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; -webkit-transition: background 0.04s linear; border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; bottom: 0px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; left: 0px; position: absolute; right: 0px; top: 0px; transition: background 0.04s linear; z-index: 100;"></span><img class="thumb" data-load-state="pending" src="https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/75x75/f6/f5/2d/f6f52d595c688d4ba70cbecc4eaf2a84.jpg" style="border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; border: 0px; height: 47.33333px; max-width: 100%; vertical-align: middle; width: 47.33333px;" /></li>
<li style="display: inline; float: left; height: 47.33333px; list-style: none; margin-left: 4px; padding: 0px; position: relative; width: 47.33333px;"><span class="hoverMask" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; -webkit-transition: background 0.04s linear; border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; bottom: 0px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; left: 0px; position: absolute; right: 0px; top: 0px; transition: background 0.04s linear; z-index: 100;"></span><img class="thumb" data-load-state="pending" src="https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/75x75/92/b9/19/92b9190905857a9bd3b1c6af81c9cb46.jpg" style="border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; border: 0px; height: 47.33333px; max-width: 100%; vertical-align: middle; width: 47.33333px;" /></li>
<li style="display: inline; float: left; height: 47.33333px; list-style: none; margin-left: 4px; padding: 0px; position: relative; width: 47.33333px;"><span class="hoverMask" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; -webkit-transition: background 0.04s linear; border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; bottom: 0px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; left: 0px; position: absolute; right: 0px; top: 0px; transition: background 0.04s linear; z-index: 100;"></span><img class="thumb" data-load-state="pending" src="https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/75x75/39/43/77/394377c8ef3ef15dddea39f78324a6e3.jpg" style="border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; border: 0px; height: 47.33333px; max-width: 100%; vertical-align: middle; width: 47.33333px;" /></li>
</ul>
</a><button class="Button Module ShowModalButton boardEditButton btn hasText rounded" style="background: linear-gradient(rgb(255, 255, 255), rgb(240, 240, 240)) rgb(240, 240, 240); border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; border: 1px solid rgb(204, 204, 204); color: #5f5f5f; cursor: pointer; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Helvetica, 'ヒラギノ角ゴ Pro W3', 'Hiragino Kaku Gothic Pro', メイリオ, Meiryo, 'MS Pゴシック', arial, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; font-weight: bold; margin: 0px 10px 10px; outline: none; padding: 7px 13px; position: relative; text-shadow: rgb(255, 255, 255) 0px 1px; vertical-align: middle; white-space: nowrap; width: 150px;" type="button"><span class="buttonText">Edit</span></button></div>
</div>
<div aria-disabled="true" class="item ui-draggable ui-draggable-disabled ui-state-disabled gridSortable" style="-webkit-transform: translateZ(0px); float: left; margin: 10px 5px 0px; width: 170px;">
<div class="Board Module boardCoverImage draggable noContext" data-component-type="1" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.219608) 0px 1px 2px 0px; background: rgb(255, 255, 255); border-bottom-left-radius: 6px; border-bottom-right-radius: 6px; border-top-left-radius: 6px; border-top-right-radius: 6px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.219608) 0px 1px 2px 0px; float: left; position: relative; width: 170px;">
<a class="boardLinkWrapper" data-element-type="36" href="https://www.pinterest.com/lucretiamccloud/comfort-enters-through-many-doors/" style="color: #555555; display: block; font-weight: bold; padding: 10px 10px 0px; position: relative; text-decoration: none;"><div class="boardName" style="-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased; font-size: 14px; height: auto; line-height: 18px; margin: 3px 1px 6px; overflow: hidden; position: relative; text-overflow: ellipsis; white-space: nowrap;">
<div class="BoardIcons Module pinCreate" style="display: inline-block; float: right; height: 16px;">
</div>
<div class="name" style="overflow: hidden; text-overflow: ellipsis;">
Comfort Enters Through Many Doors</div>
</div>
<div class="boardCoverWrapper" style="background-color: #eeeeee; clear: both; height: 101.38889px; overflow: hidden; position: relative; width: 150px;">
<span class="hoverMask" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; -webkit-transition: background 0.04s linear; border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; bottom: 0px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; left: 0px; position: absolute; right: 0px; top: 0px; transition: background 0.04s linear; z-index: 100;"></span><img alt="Comfort Enters Through Many Doors / “‘For I well know the thoughts that I am thinking toward you,’ declares Jehovah, ‘thoughts of peace, and not of calamity, to give you a future and a hope." Jer. 29:11. . . . "He has made everything beautiful in its time. He has even put eternity in their heart; yet mankind will never find out the work that the true God has made from start to finish." Jeremiah 29:11 / by Lucretia McCloud" class="boardCover" data-load-state="pending" src="https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/custom_covers/216x146/413205403250329194_1427917105.jpg" style="border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; border: 0px; clear: both; height: 101.38889px; max-width: 100%; vertical-align: middle; width: 150px;" /><span class="boardPinCount" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.2) 0px 0px 5px inset, rgba(255, 255, 255, 0.298039) 0px 1px 0px; -webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased; background-color: rgba(68, 68, 68, 0.701961); border-bottom-left-radius: 2px; border-bottom-right-radius: 2px; border-top-left-radius: 2px; border-top-right-radius: 2px; bottom: 3px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.2) 0px 0px 5px inset, rgba(255, 255, 255, 0.298039) 0px 1px 0px; color: white; left: 3px; padding: 3px 6px; position: absolute; text-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.701961) 0px -1px 0px;"><div class="Module PinCount">
<span class="pinIcon" style="background: url(https://s-passets-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/webapp/style/sprites/webapp-common-above_the_fold-2x-6bfc28da.png) -158px -130px / 214px 199px no-repeat; display: inline-block; height: 9px; margin-right: 3px; width: 7px;"></span>1,509</div>
</span></div>
<ul class="boardThumbs" style="margin: 4px 0px; padding: 0px;">
<li style="display: inline; float: left; height: 47.33333px; list-style: none; margin-left: 0px; padding: 0px; position: relative; width: 47.33333px;"><span class="hoverMask" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; -webkit-transition: background 0.04s linear; border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; bottom: 0px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; left: 0px; position: absolute; right: 0px; top: 0px; transition: background 0.04s linear; z-index: 100;"></span><img class="thumb" data-load-state="pending" src="https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/75x75/c5/38/da/c538dafafbbf242bb06d88c67818bc40.jpg" style="border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; border: 0px; height: 47.33333px; max-width: 100%; vertical-align: middle; width: 47.33333px;" /></li>
<li style="display: inline; float: left; height: 47.33333px; list-style: none; margin-left: 4px; padding: 0px; position: relative; width: 47.33333px;"><span class="hoverMask" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; -webkit-transition: background 0.04s linear; border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; bottom: 0px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; left: 0px; position: absolute; right: 0px; top: 0px; transition: background 0.04s linear; z-index: 100;"></span><img class="thumb" data-load-state="pending" src="https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/75x75/7c/64/79/7c6479ccb0fee86fe5fdf4a03c96a74b.jpg" style="border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; border: 0px; height: 47.33333px; max-width: 100%; vertical-align: middle; width: 47.33333px;" /></li>
<li style="display: inline; float: left; height: 47.33333px; list-style: none; margin-left: 4px; padding: 0px; position: relative; width: 47.33333px;"><span class="hoverMask" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; -webkit-transition: background 0.04s linear; border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; bottom: 0px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; left: 0px; position: absolute; right: 0px; top: 0px; transition: background 0.04s linear; z-index: 100;"></span><img class="thumb" data-load-state="pending" src="https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/75x75/4b/d0/0d/4bd00d311b6a276a5757e5965eb68056.jpg" style="border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; border: 0px; height: 47.33333px; max-width: 100%; vertical-align: middle; width: 47.33333px;" /></li>
</ul>
</a><button class="Button Module ShowModalButton boardEditButton btn hasText rounded" style="background: linear-gradient(rgb(255, 255, 255), rgb(240, 240, 240)) rgb(240, 240, 240); border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; border: 1px solid rgb(204, 204, 204); color: #5f5f5f; cursor: pointer; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Helvetica, 'ヒラギノ角ゴ Pro W3', 'Hiragino Kaku Gothic Pro', メイリオ, Meiryo, 'MS Pゴシック', arial, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; font-weight: bold; margin: 0px 10px 10px; outline: none; padding: 7px 13px; position: relative; text-shadow: rgb(255, 255, 255) 0px 1px; vertical-align: middle; white-space: nowrap; width: 150px;" type="button"><span class="buttonText">Edit</span></button></div>
</div>
<div aria-disabled="true" class="item ui-draggable ui-draggable-disabled ui-state-disabled gridSortable" style="-webkit-transform: translateZ(0px); float: left; margin: 10px 5px 0px; width: 170px;">
<div class="Board Module boardCoverImage draggable noContext" data-component-type="1" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.219608) 0px 1px 2px 0px; background: rgb(255, 255, 255); border-bottom-left-radius: 6px; border-bottom-right-radius: 6px; border-top-left-radius: 6px; border-top-right-radius: 6px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.219608) 0px 1px 2px 0px; float: left; position: relative; width: 170px;">
<a class="boardLinkWrapper" data-element-type="36" href="https://www.pinterest.com/lucretiamccloud/lets-getstay-married/" style="color: #555555; display: block; font-weight: bold; padding: 10px 10px 0px; position: relative; text-decoration: none;"><div class="boardName" style="-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased; font-size: 14px; height: auto; line-height: 18px; margin: 3px 1px 6px; overflow: hidden; position: relative; text-overflow: ellipsis; white-space: nowrap;">
<div class="BoardIcons Module pinCreate" style="display: inline-block; float: right; height: 16px;">
</div>
<div class="name" style="overflow: hidden; text-overflow: ellipsis;">
Let's Get/Stay Married!</div>
</div>
<div class="boardCoverWrapper" style="background-color: #eeeeee; clear: both; height: 101.38889px; overflow: hidden; position: relative; width: 150px;">
<span class="hoverMask" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; -webkit-transition: background 0.04s linear; border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; bottom: 0px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; left: 0px; position: absolute; right: 0px; top: 0px; transition: background 0.04s linear; z-index: 100;"></span><img alt="Let's Get/Stay Married! / After the wedding....what?...."And Jehovah God built the rib that he had taken from the man into a woman, and he brought her to the man. Then the man said: “This is at last bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh. This one will be called Woman, because from man she was taken.” That is why A Man Will Leave His Father And His Mother and He Will Stick To His Wife, and they will become one flesh." Genesis 2:22-24. / by Lucretia McCloud" class="boardCover" data-load-state="pending" src="https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/custom_covers/216x146/413205403250328381_1427917065.jpg" style="border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; border: 0px; clear: both; height: 101.38889px; max-width: 100%; vertical-align: middle; width: 150px;" /><span class="boardPinCount" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.2) 0px 0px 5px inset, rgba(255, 255, 255, 0.298039) 0px 1px 0px; -webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased; background-color: rgba(68, 68, 68, 0.701961); border-bottom-left-radius: 2px; border-bottom-right-radius: 2px; border-top-left-radius: 2px; border-top-right-radius: 2px; bottom: 3px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.2) 0px 0px 5px inset, rgba(255, 255, 255, 0.298039) 0px 1px 0px; color: white; left: 3px; padding: 3px 6px; position: absolute; text-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.701961) 0px -1px 0px;"><div class="Module PinCount">
<span class="pinIcon" style="background: url(https://s-passets-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/webapp/style/sprites/webapp-common-above_the_fold-2x-6bfc28da.png) -158px -130px / 214px 199px no-repeat; display: inline-block; height: 9px; margin-right: 3px; width: 7px;"></span>374</div>
</span></div>
<ul class="boardThumbs" style="margin: 4px 0px; padding: 0px;">
<li style="display: inline; float: left; height: 47.33333px; list-style: none; margin-left: 0px; padding: 0px; position: relative; width: 47.33333px;"><span class="hoverMask" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; -webkit-transition: background 0.04s linear; border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; bottom: 0px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; left: 0px; position: absolute; right: 0px; top: 0px; transition: background 0.04s linear; z-index: 100;"></span><img class="thumb" data-load-state="pending" src="https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/75x75/7c/c5/cc/7cc5cc13655076542ecc90a2b7901ca3.jpg" style="border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; border: 0px; height: 47.33333px; max-width: 100%; vertical-align: middle; width: 47.33333px;" /></li>
<li style="display: inline; float: left; height: 47.33333px; list-style: none; margin-left: 4px; padding: 0px; position: relative; width: 47.33333px;"><span class="hoverMask" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; -webkit-transition: background 0.04s linear; border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; bottom: 0px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; left: 0px; position: absolute; right: 0px; top: 0px; transition: background 0.04s linear; z-index: 100;"></span><img class="thumb" data-load-state="pending" src="https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/75x75/86/e3/fa/86e3fa971d24c616ecf017581db36de0.jpg" style="border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; border: 0px; height: 47.33333px; max-width: 100%; vertical-align: middle; width: 47.33333px;" /></li>
<li style="display: inline; float: left; height: 47.33333px; list-style: none; margin-left: 4px; padding: 0px; position: relative; width: 47.33333px;"><span class="hoverMask" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; -webkit-transition: background 0.04s linear; border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; bottom: 0px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; left: 0px; position: absolute; right: 0px; top: 0px; transition: background 0.04s linear; z-index: 100;"></span><img class="thumb" data-load-state="pending" src="https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/75x75/a5/f7/76/a5f7761b96305d0a9c499248abf4eab4.jpg" style="border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; border: 0px; height: 47.33333px; max-width: 100%; vertical-align: middle; width: 47.33333px;" /></li>
</ul>
</a><button class="Button Module ShowModalButton boardEditButton btn hasText rounded" style="background: linear-gradient(rgb(255, 255, 255), rgb(240, 240, 240)) rgb(240, 240, 240); border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; border: 1px solid rgb(204, 204, 204); color: #5f5f5f; cursor: pointer; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Helvetica, 'ヒラギノ角ゴ Pro W3', 'Hiragino Kaku Gothic Pro', メイリオ, Meiryo, 'MS Pゴシック', arial, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; font-weight: bold; margin: 0px 10px 10px; outline: none; padding: 7px 13px; position: relative; text-shadow: rgb(255, 255, 255) 0px 1px; vertical-align: middle; white-space: nowrap; width: 150px;" type="button"><span class="buttonText">Edit</span></button></div>
</div>
<div aria-disabled="true" class="item ui-draggable ui-draggable-disabled ui-state-disabled gridSortable" style="-webkit-transform: translateZ(0px); float: left; margin: 10px 5px 0px; width: 170px;">
<div class="Board Module boardCoverImage draggable noContext" data-component-type="1" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.219608) 0px 1px 2px 0px; background: rgb(255, 255, 255); border-bottom-left-radius: 6px; border-bottom-right-radius: 6px; border-top-left-radius: 6px; border-top-right-radius: 6px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.219608) 0px 1px 2px 0px; float: left; position: relative; width: 170px;">
<a class="boardLinkWrapper" data-element-type="36" href="https://www.pinterest.com/lucretiamccloud/who-would-you-like-to-see-again/" style="color: #555555; display: block; font-weight: bold; padding: 10px 10px 0px; position: relative; text-decoration: none;"><div class="boardName" style="-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased; font-size: 14px; height: auto; line-height: 18px; margin: 3px 1px 6px; overflow: hidden; position: relative; text-overflow: ellipsis; white-space: nowrap;">
<div class="BoardIcons Module pinCreate" style="display: inline-block; float: right; height: 16px;">
</div>
<div class="name" style="overflow: hidden; text-overflow: ellipsis;">
Who Would You Like To See Again?</div>
</div>
<div class="boardCoverWrapper" style="background-color: #eeeeee; clear: both; height: 101.38889px; overflow: hidden; position: relative; width: 150px;">
<span class="hoverMask" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; -webkit-transition: background 0.04s linear; border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; bottom: 0px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; left: 0px; position: absolute; right: 0px; top: 0px; transition: background 0.04s linear; z-index: 100;"></span><img alt="Who Would You Like To See Again? / “Your dead will live. My corpses will rise up. Awake and shout joyfully, you residents in the dust! For your dew is as the dew of the morning, and the earth will let those Powerless In Death Come To Life." Isaiah 26:19. . . "Do not be amazed at this, for the hour is coming in which ALL those in the memorial tombs will Hear His Voice and Come Out." John 5:28, 29. / by Lucretia McCloud" class="boardCover" data-load-state="pending" src="https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/custom_covers/216x146/413205403250332567_1427918362.jpg" style="border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; border: 0px; clear: both; height: 101.38889px; max-width: 100%; vertical-align: middle; width: 150px;" /><span class="boardPinCount" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.2) 0px 0px 5px inset, rgba(255, 255, 255, 0.298039) 0px 1px 0px; -webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased; background-color: rgba(68, 68, 68, 0.701961); border-bottom-left-radius: 2px; border-bottom-right-radius: 2px; border-top-left-radius: 2px; border-top-right-radius: 2px; bottom: 3px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.2) 0px 0px 5px inset, rgba(255, 255, 255, 0.298039) 0px 1px 0px; color: white; left: 3px; padding: 3px 6px; position: absolute; text-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.701961) 0px -1px 0px;"><div class="Module PinCount">
<span class="pinIcon" style="background: url(https://s-passets-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/webapp/style/sprites/webapp-common-above_the_fold-2x-6bfc28da.png) -158px -130px / 214px 199px no-repeat; display: inline-block; height: 9px; margin-right: 3px; width: 7px;"></span>403</div>
</span></div>
<ul class="boardThumbs" style="margin: 4px 0px; padding: 0px;">
<li style="display: inline; float: left; height: 47.33333px; list-style: none; margin-left: 0px; padding: 0px; position: relative; width: 47.33333px;"><span class="hoverMask" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; -webkit-transition: background 0.04s linear; border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; bottom: 0px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; left: 0px; position: absolute; right: 0px; top: 0px; transition: background 0.04s linear; z-index: 100;"></span><img class="thumb" data-load-state="pending" src="https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/75x75/0a/0b/2b/0a0b2b9085ebbc8eecf73e5bb65bafaa.jpg" style="border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; border: 0px; height: 47.33333px; max-width: 100%; vertical-align: middle; width: 47.33333px;" /></li>
<li style="display: inline; float: left; height: 47.33333px; list-style: none; margin-left: 4px; padding: 0px; position: relative; width: 47.33333px;"><span class="hoverMask" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; -webkit-transition: background 0.04s linear; border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; bottom: 0px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; left: 0px; position: absolute; right: 0px; top: 0px; transition: background 0.04s linear; z-index: 100;"></span><img class="thumb" data-load-state="pending" src="https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/75x75/7c/4d/3b/7c4d3b8676001c30b3a2436b928bfed8.jpg" style="border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; border: 0px; height: 47.33333px; max-width: 100%; vertical-align: middle; width: 47.33333px;" /></li>
<li style="display: inline; float: left; height: 47.33333px; list-style: none; margin-left: 4px; padding: 0px; position: relative; width: 47.33333px;"><span class="hoverMask" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; -webkit-transition: background 0.04s linear; border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; bottom: 0px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; left: 0px; position: absolute; right: 0px; top: 0px; transition: background 0.04s linear; z-index: 100;"></span><img class="thumb" data-load-state="pending" src="https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/75x75/1f/92/1a/1f921a189e59ff295e0177f67ff03d0a.jpg" style="border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; border: 0px; height: 47.33333px; max-width: 100%; vertical-align: middle; width: 47.33333px;" /></li>
</ul>
</a><button class="Button Module ShowModalButton boardEditButton btn hasText rounded" style="background: linear-gradient(rgb(255, 255, 255), rgb(240, 240, 240)) rgb(240, 240, 240); border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; border: 1px solid rgb(204, 204, 204); color: #5f5f5f; cursor: pointer; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Helvetica, 'ヒラギノ角ゴ Pro W3', 'Hiragino Kaku Gothic Pro', メイリオ, Meiryo, 'MS Pゴシック', arial, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; font-weight: bold; margin: 0px 10px 10px; outline: none; padding: 7px 13px; position: relative; text-shadow: rgb(255, 255, 255) 0px 1px; vertical-align: middle; white-space: nowrap; width: 150px;" type="button"><span class="buttonText">Edit</span></button></div>
</div>
<div aria-disabled="true" class="item ui-draggable ui-draggable-disabled ui-state-disabled gridSortable" style="-webkit-transform: translateZ(0px); float: left; margin: 10px 5px 0px; width: 170px;">
<div class="Board Module boardCoverImage draggable noContext" data-component-type="1" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.219608) 0px 1px 2px 0px; background: rgb(255, 255, 255); border-bottom-left-radius: 6px; border-bottom-right-radius: 6px; border-top-left-radius: 6px; border-top-right-radius: 6px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.219608) 0px 1px 2px 0px; float: left; position: relative; width: 170px;">
<a class="boardLinkWrapper" data-element-type="36" href="https://www.pinterest.com/lucretiamccloud/worth-an-eye-or-hear/" style="color: #555555; display: block; font-weight: bold; padding: 10px 10px 0px; position: relative; text-decoration: none;"><div class="boardName" style="-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased; font-size: 14px; height: auto; line-height: 18px; margin: 3px 1px 6px; overflow: hidden; position: relative; text-overflow: ellipsis; white-space: nowrap;">
<div class="BoardIcons Module pinCreate" style="display: inline-block; float: right; height: 16px;">
</div>
<div class="name" style="overflow: hidden; text-overflow: ellipsis;">
Worth An Eye or Hear</div>
</div>
<div class="boardCoverWrapper" style="background-color: #eeeeee; clear: both; height: 101.38889px; overflow: hidden; position: relative; width: 150px;">
<span class="hoverMask" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; -webkit-transition: background 0.04s linear; border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; bottom: 0px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; left: 0px; position: absolute; right: 0px; top: 0px; transition: background 0.04s linear; z-index: 100;"></span><img alt="Worth An Eye or Hear / These are things the literal or photographic eye has seen/captured. So imagine the literal fulfillment of this future promise/prophecy: “Eye has not seen and ear has not heard, nor have there been Conceived in the heart of man the things that God has prepared for those who love him.” 1 Cor. 2:9. . . We can't imagine...so we must be alive to see it. / by Lucretia McCloud" class="boardCover" data-load-state="pending" src="https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/custom_covers/216x146/413205403250327238_1417550637.jpg" style="border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; border: 0px; clear: both; height: 101.38889px; max-width: 100%; vertical-align: middle; width: 150px;" /><span class="boardPinCount" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.2) 0px 0px 5px inset, rgba(255, 255, 255, 0.298039) 0px 1px 0px; -webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased; background-color: rgba(68, 68, 68, 0.701961); border-bottom-left-radius: 2px; border-bottom-right-radius: 2px; border-top-left-radius: 2px; border-top-right-radius: 2px; bottom: 3px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.2) 0px 0px 5px inset, rgba(255, 255, 255, 0.298039) 0px 1px 0px; color: white; left: 3px; padding: 3px 6px; position: absolute; text-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.701961) 0px -1px 0px;"><div class="Module PinCount">
<span class="pinIcon" style="background: url(https://s-passets-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/webapp/style/sprites/webapp-common-above_the_fold-2x-6bfc28da.png) -158px -130px / 214px 199px no-repeat; display: inline-block; height: 9px; margin-right: 3px; width: 7px;"></span>1,818</div>
</span></div>
<ul class="boardThumbs" style="margin: 4px 0px; padding: 0px;">
<li style="display: inline; float: left; height: 47.33333px; list-style: none; margin-left: 0px; padding: 0px; position: relative; width: 47.33333px;"><span class="hoverMask" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; -webkit-transition: background 0.04s linear; border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; bottom: 0px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; left: 0px; position: absolute; right: 0px; top: 0px; transition: background 0.04s linear; z-index: 100;"></span><img class="thumb" data-load-state="pending" src="https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/75x75/be/95/40/be95401b0268d9801018e240ce11e645.jpg" style="border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; border: 0px; height: 47.33333px; max-width: 100%; vertical-align: middle; width: 47.33333px;" /></li>
<li style="display: inline; float: left; height: 47.33333px; list-style: none; margin-left: 4px; padding: 0px; position: relative; width: 47.33333px;"><span class="hoverMask" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; -webkit-transition: background 0.04s linear; border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; bottom: 0px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; left: 0px; position: absolute; right: 0px; top: 0px; transition: background 0.04s linear; z-index: 100;"></span><img class="thumb" data-load-state="pending" src="https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/75x75/6a/a2/22/6aa222fad9224399c4c988bb69634941.jpg" style="border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; border: 0px; height: 47.33333px; max-width: 100%; vertical-align: middle; width: 47.33333px;" /></li>
<li style="display: inline; float: left; height: 47.33333px; list-style: none; margin-left: 4px; padding: 0px; position: relative; width: 47.33333px;"><span class="hoverMask" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; -webkit-transition: background 0.04s linear; border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; bottom: 0px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; left: 0px; position: absolute; right: 0px; top: 0px; transition: background 0.04s linear; z-index: 100;"></span><img class="thumb" data-load-state="pending" src="https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/75x75/a7/39/e6/a739e6716f79b45c1a11e24e0077c0de.jpg" style="border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; border: 0px; height: 47.33333px; max-width: 100%; vertical-align: middle; width: 47.33333px;" /></li>
</ul>
</a><button class="Button Module ShowModalButton boardEditButton btn hasText rounded" style="background: linear-gradient(rgb(255, 255, 255), rgb(240, 240, 240)) rgb(240, 240, 240); border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; border: 1px solid rgb(204, 204, 204); color: #5f5f5f; cursor: pointer; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Helvetica, 'ヒラギノ角ゴ Pro W3', 'Hiragino Kaku Gothic Pro', メイリオ, Meiryo, 'MS Pゴシック', arial, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; font-weight: bold; margin: 0px 10px 10px; outline: none; padding: 7px 13px; position: relative; text-shadow: rgb(255, 255, 255) 0px 1px; vertical-align: middle; white-space: nowrap; width: 150px;" type="button"><span class="buttonText">Edit</span></button></div>
</div>
<div aria-disabled="true" class="item ui-draggable ui-draggable-disabled ui-state-disabled gridSortable" style="-webkit-transform: translateZ(0px); float: left; margin: 10px 5px 0px; width: 170px;">
<div class="Board Module boardCoverImage draggable noContext" data-component-type="1" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.219608) 0px 1px 2px 0px; background: rgb(255, 255, 255); border-bottom-left-radius: 6px; border-bottom-right-radius: 6px; border-top-left-radius: 6px; border-top-right-radius: 6px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.219608) 0px 1px 2px 0px; float: left; position: relative; width: 170px;">
<a class="boardLinkWrapper" data-element-type="36" href="https://www.pinterest.com/lucretiamccloud/the-wonderful-world-of-shoes/" style="color: #555555; display: block; font-weight: bold; padding: 10px 10px 0px; position: relative; text-decoration: none;"><div class="boardName" style="-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased; font-size: 14px; height: auto; line-height: 18px; margin: 3px 1px 6px; overflow: hidden; position: relative; text-overflow: ellipsis; white-space: nowrap;">
<div class="BoardIcons Module pinCreate" style="display: inline-block; float: right; height: 16px;">
</div>
<div class="name" style="overflow: hidden; text-overflow: ellipsis;">
The Wonderful world of Shoes!!!</div>
</div>
<div class="boardCoverWrapper" style="background-color: #eeeeee; clear: both; height: 101.38889px; overflow: hidden; position: relative; width: 150px;">
<span class="hoverMask" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; -webkit-transition: background 0.04s linear; border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; bottom: 0px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; left: 0px; position: absolute; right: 0px; top: 0px; transition: background 0.04s linear; z-index: 100;"></span><img alt="The Wonderful world of Shoes!!! / "I then clothed you with an embroidered garment and gave you fine leather sandals." Ezekiel 16:10. / by Lucretia McCloud" class="boardCover" data-load-state="pending" src="https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/custom_covers/216x146/413205403250328908_1427918177.jpg" style="border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; border: 0px; clear: both; height: 101.38889px; max-width: 100%; vertical-align: middle; width: 150px;" /><span class="boardPinCount" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.2) 0px 0px 5px inset, rgba(255, 255, 255, 0.298039) 0px 1px 0px; -webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased; background-color: rgba(68, 68, 68, 0.701961); border-bottom-left-radius: 2px; border-bottom-right-radius: 2px; border-top-left-radius: 2px; border-top-right-radius: 2px; bottom: 3px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.2) 0px 0px 5px inset, rgba(255, 255, 255, 0.298039) 0px 1px 0px; color: white; left: 3px; padding: 3px 6px; position: absolute; text-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.701961) 0px -1px 0px;"><div class="Module PinCount">
<span class="pinIcon" style="background: url(https://s-passets-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/webapp/style/sprites/webapp-common-above_the_fold-2x-6bfc28da.png) -158px -130px / 214px 199px no-repeat; display: inline-block; height: 9px; margin-right: 3px; width: 7px;"></span>875</div>
</span></div>
<ul class="boardThumbs" style="margin: 4px 0px; padding: 0px;">
<li style="display: inline; float: left; height: 47.33333px; list-style: none; margin-left: 0px; padding: 0px; position: relative; width: 47.33333px;"><span class="hoverMask" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; -webkit-transition: background 0.04s linear; border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; bottom: 0px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; left: 0px; position: absolute; right: 0px; top: 0px; transition: background 0.04s linear; z-index: 100;"></span><img class="thumb" data-load-state="pending" src="https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/75x75/87/59/5c/87595c4593e16c48e87b8d9f0579c29e.jpg" style="border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; border: 0px; height: 47.33333px; max-width: 100%; vertical-align: middle; width: 47.33333px;" /></li>
<li style="display: inline; float: left; height: 47.33333px; list-style: none; margin-left: 4px; padding: 0px; position: relative; width: 47.33333px;"><span class="hoverMask" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; -webkit-transition: background 0.04s linear; border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; bottom: 0px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; left: 0px; position: absolute; right: 0px; top: 0px; transition: background 0.04s linear; z-index: 100;"></span><img class="thumb" data-load-state="pending" src="https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/75x75/a8/21/54/a82154b6ebdf6e6d2794ce21fc82d960.jpg" style="border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; border: 0px; height: 47.33333px; max-width: 100%; vertical-align: middle; width: 47.33333px;" /></li>
<li style="display: inline; float: left; height: 47.33333px; list-style: none; margin-left: 4px; padding: 0px; position: relative; width: 47.33333px;"><span class="hoverMask" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; -webkit-transition: background 0.04s linear; border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; bottom: 0px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; left: 0px; position: absolute; right: 0px; top: 0px; transition: background 0.04s linear; z-index: 100;"></span><img class="thumb" data-load-state="pending" src="https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/75x75/88/0e/02/880e02c1328f601fa2799712b56d0fd8.jpg" style="border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; border: 0px; height: 47.33333px; max-width: 100%; vertical-align: middle; width: 47.33333px;" /></li>
</ul>
</a><button class="Button Module ShowModalButton boardEditButton btn hasText rounded" style="background: linear-gradient(rgb(255, 255, 255), rgb(240, 240, 240)) rgb(240, 240, 240); border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; border: 1px solid rgb(204, 204, 204); color: #5f5f5f; cursor: pointer; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Helvetica, 'ヒラギノ角ゴ Pro W3', 'Hiragino Kaku Gothic Pro', メイリオ, Meiryo, 'MS Pゴシック', arial, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; font-weight: bold; margin: 0px 10px 10px; outline: none; padding: 7px 13px; position: relative; text-shadow: rgb(255, 255, 255) 0px 1px; vertical-align: middle; white-space: nowrap; width: 150px;" type="button"><span class="buttonText">Edit</span></button></div>
</div>
<div aria-disabled="true" class="item ui-draggable ui-draggable-disabled ui-state-disabled gridSortable" style="-webkit-transform: translateZ(0px); float: left; margin: 10px 5px 0px; width: 170px;">
<div class="Board Module boardCoverImage draggable noContext" data-component-type="1" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.219608) 0px 1px 2px 0px; background: rgb(255, 255, 255); border-bottom-left-radius: 6px; border-bottom-right-radius: 6px; border-top-left-radius: 6px; border-top-right-radius: 6px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.219608) 0px 1px 2px 0px; float: left; position: relative; width: 170px;">
<a class="boardLinkWrapper" data-element-type="36" href="https://www.pinterest.com/lucretiamccloud/can-you-imagine-what-fashions-will-forever-be/" style="color: #555555; display: block; font-weight: bold; padding: 10px 10px 0px; position: relative; text-decoration: none;"><div class="boardName" style="-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased; font-size: 14px; height: auto; line-height: 18px; margin: 3px 1px 6px; overflow: hidden; position: relative; text-overflow: ellipsis; white-space: nowrap;">
<div class="BoardIcons Module pinCreate" style="display: inline-block; float: right; height: 16px;">
</div>
<div class="name" style="overflow: hidden; text-overflow: ellipsis;">
Can You Imagine What Fashions Will Forever Be?</div>
</div>
<div class="boardCoverWrapper" style="background-color: #eeeeee; clear: both; height: 101.38889px; overflow: hidden; position: relative; width: 150px;">
<span class="hoverMask" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; -webkit-transition: background 0.04s linear; border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; bottom: 0px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; left: 0px; position: absolute; right: 0px; top: 0px; transition: background 0.04s linear; z-index: 100;"></span><img alt="Can You Imagine What Fashions Will Forever Be? / "And Jehovah God proceeded to make long garments of skin for Adam and for his wife and to clothe them." Ge 3:21..."Why are you anxious about clothing? Take a lesson from the lilies of the field, how they grow; they do not toil, nor do they spin; but I tell you that not even Sol′o·mon in all his glory was arrayed as one of these. Now if this is how God clothes the vegetation of the field that is here today and tomorrow is thrown into the oven, will he not much rather clothe you." Matt. 6:28-30. / by Lucretia McCloud" class="boardCover" data-load-state="pending" src="https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/custom_covers/216x146/413205403250364617_1417728747.jpg" style="border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; border: 0px; clear: both; height: 101.38889px; max-width: 100%; vertical-align: middle; width: 150px;" /><span class="boardPinCount" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.2) 0px 0px 5px inset, rgba(255, 255, 255, 0.298039) 0px 1px 0px; -webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased; background-color: rgba(68, 68, 68, 0.701961); border-bottom-left-radius: 2px; border-bottom-right-radius: 2px; border-top-left-radius: 2px; border-top-right-radius: 2px; bottom: 3px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.2) 0px 0px 5px inset, rgba(255, 255, 255, 0.298039) 0px 1px 0px; color: white; left: 3px; padding: 3px 6px; position: absolute; text-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.701961) 0px -1px 0px;"><div class="Module PinCount">
<span class="pinIcon" style="background: url(https://s-passets-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/webapp/style/sprites/webapp-common-above_the_fold-2x-6bfc28da.png) -158px -130px / 214px 199px no-repeat; display: inline-block; height: 9px; margin-right: 3px; width: 7px;"></span>2,460</div>
</span></div>
<ul class="boardThumbs" style="margin: 4px 0px; padding: 0px;">
<li style="display: inline; float: left; height: 47.33333px; list-style: none; margin-left: 0px; padding: 0px; position: relative; width: 47.33333px;"><span class="hoverMask" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; -webkit-transition: background 0.04s linear; border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; bottom: 0px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; left: 0px; position: absolute; right: 0px; top: 0px; transition: background 0.04s linear; z-index: 100;"></span><img class="thumb" data-load-state="pending" src="https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/75x75/b8/82/d4/b882d45432b0dcf0186655a2b8dd4d57.jpg" style="border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; border: 0px; height: 47.33333px; max-width: 100%; vertical-align: middle; width: 47.33333px;" /></li>
<li style="display: inline; float: left; height: 47.33333px; list-style: none; margin-left: 4px; padding: 0px; position: relative; width: 47.33333px;"><span class="hoverMask" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; -webkit-transition: background 0.04s linear; border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; bottom: 0px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; left: 0px; position: absolute; right: 0px; top: 0px; transition: background 0.04s linear; z-index: 100;"></span><img class="thumb" data-load-state="pending" src="https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/75x75/2a/86/dc/2a86dc7e19f64cf56debd0d6643a61a9.jpg" style="border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; border: 0px; height: 47.33333px; max-width: 100%; vertical-align: middle; width: 47.33333px;" /></li>
<li style="display: inline; float: left; height: 47.33333px; list-style: none; margin-left: 4px; padding: 0px; position: relative; width: 47.33333px;"><span class="hoverMask" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; -webkit-transition: background 0.04s linear; border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; bottom: 0px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; left: 0px; position: absolute; right: 0px; top: 0px; transition: background 0.04s linear; z-index: 100;"></span><img class="thumb" data-load-state="pending" src="https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/75x75/3c/6b/b2/3c6bb2b39ae96b99cd26be9c3431dd13.jpg" style="border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; border: 0px; height: 47.33333px; max-width: 100%; vertical-align: middle; width: 47.33333px;" /></li>
</ul>
</a><button class="Button Module ShowModalButton boardEditButton btn hasText rounded" style="background: linear-gradient(rgb(255, 255, 255), rgb(240, 240, 240)) rgb(240, 240, 240); border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; border: 1px solid rgb(204, 204, 204); color: #5f5f5f; cursor: pointer; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Helvetica, 'ヒラギノ角ゴ Pro W3', 'Hiragino Kaku Gothic Pro', メイリオ, Meiryo, 'MS Pゴシック', arial, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; font-weight: bold; margin: 0px 10px 10px; outline: none; padding: 7px 13px; position: relative; text-shadow: rgb(255, 255, 255) 0px 1px; vertical-align: middle; white-space: nowrap; width: 150px;" type="button"><span class="buttonText">Edit</span></button></div>
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<div aria-disabled="true" class="item ui-draggable ui-draggable-disabled ui-state-disabled gridSortable" style="-webkit-transform: translateZ(0px); float: left; margin: 10px 5px 0px; width: 170px;">
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<a class="boardLinkWrapper" data-element-type="36" href="https://www.pinterest.com/lucretiamccloud/darkness-vs-light-is-not-always-black-and-white/" style="color: #555555; display: block; font-weight: bold; padding: 10px 10px 0px; position: relative; text-decoration: none;"><div class="boardName" style="-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased; font-size: 14px; height: auto; line-height: 18px; margin: 3px 1px 6px; overflow: hidden; position: relative; text-overflow: ellipsis; white-space: nowrap;">
<div class="BoardIcons Module pinCreate" style="display: inline-block; float: right; height: 16px;">
</div>
<div class="name" style="overflow: hidden; text-overflow: ellipsis;">
Darkness Vs. Light Is Not Always Black and White</div>
</div>
<div class="boardCoverWrapper" style="background-color: #eeeeee; clear: both; height: 101.38889px; overflow: hidden; position: relative; width: 150px;">
<span class="hoverMask" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; -webkit-transition: background 0.04s linear; border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; bottom: 0px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; left: 0px; position: absolute; right: 0px; top: 0px; transition: background 0.04s linear; z-index: 100;"></span><img alt="Darkness Vs. Light Is Not Always Black and White / "What sharing does light have with darkness?" 2 Corinthians 6:14. . .In ART? ... Obviously a Lot! ...In worship?... "For you were once darkness, but you are now light in connection with the Lord. Go on walking as children of light, for the fruitage of the light consists of Every Sort of Goodness and Righteousness and TRUTH." Eph. 5:8, 9. / by Lucretia McCloud" class="boardCover" data-load-state="pending" src="https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/custom_covers/216x146/413205403250358135_1427918029.jpg" style="border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; border: 0px; clear: both; height: 101.38889px; max-width: 100%; vertical-align: middle; width: 150px;" /><span class="boardPinCount" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.2) 0px 0px 5px inset, rgba(255, 255, 255, 0.298039) 0px 1px 0px; -webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased; background-color: rgba(68, 68, 68, 0.701961); border-bottom-left-radius: 2px; border-bottom-right-radius: 2px; border-top-left-radius: 2px; border-top-right-radius: 2px; bottom: 3px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.2) 0px 0px 5px inset, rgba(255, 255, 255, 0.298039) 0px 1px 0px; color: white; left: 3px; padding: 3px 6px; position: absolute; text-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.701961) 0px -1px 0px;"><div class="Module PinCount">
<span class="pinIcon" style="background: url(https://s-passets-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/webapp/style/sprites/webapp-common-above_the_fold-2x-6bfc28da.png) -158px -130px / 214px 199px no-repeat; display: inline-block; height: 9px; margin-right: 3px; width: 7px;"></span>779</div>
</span></div>
<ul class="boardThumbs" style="margin: 4px 0px; padding: 0px;">
<li style="display: inline; float: left; height: 47.33333px; list-style: none; margin-left: 0px; padding: 0px; position: relative; width: 47.33333px;"><span class="hoverMask" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; -webkit-transition: background 0.04s linear; border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; bottom: 0px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; left: 0px; position: absolute; right: 0px; top: 0px; transition: background 0.04s linear; z-index: 100;"></span><img class="thumb" data-load-state="pending" src="https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/75x75/a0/fa/9f/a0fa9fc0b8cd7775c2bbe3f92ddc25d3.jpg" style="border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; border: 0px; height: 47.33333px; max-width: 100%; vertical-align: middle; width: 47.33333px;" /></li>
<li style="display: inline; float: left; height: 47.33333px; list-style: none; margin-left: 4px; padding: 0px; position: relative; width: 47.33333px;"><span class="hoverMask" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; -webkit-transition: background 0.04s linear; border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; bottom: 0px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; left: 0px; position: absolute; right: 0px; top: 0px; transition: background 0.04s linear; z-index: 100;"></span><img class="thumb" data-load-state="pending" src="https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/75x75/de/78/92/de789283119582d78fdd51ec6e926787.jpg" style="border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; border: 0px; height: 47.33333px; max-width: 100%; vertical-align: middle; width: 47.33333px;" /></li>
<li style="display: inline; float: left; height: 47.33333px; list-style: none; margin-left: 4px; padding: 0px; position: relative; width: 47.33333px;"><span class="hoverMask" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; -webkit-transition: background 0.04s linear; border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; bottom: 0px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; left: 0px; position: absolute; right: 0px; top: 0px; transition: background 0.04s linear; z-index: 100;"></span><img class="thumb" data-load-state="pending" src="https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/75x75/b1/a9/46/b1a946059aff358939c22e1d160ecbd5.jpg" style="border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; border: 0px; height: 47.33333px; max-width: 100%; vertical-align: middle; width: 47.33333px;" /></li>
</ul>
</a><button class="Button Module ShowModalButton boardEditButton btn hasText rounded" style="background: linear-gradient(rgb(255, 255, 255), rgb(240, 240, 240)) rgb(240, 240, 240); border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; border: 1px solid rgb(204, 204, 204); color: #5f5f5f; cursor: pointer; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Helvetica, 'ヒラギノ角ゴ Pro W3', 'Hiragino Kaku Gothic Pro', メイリオ, Meiryo, 'MS Pゴシック', arial, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; font-weight: bold; margin: 0px 10px 10px; outline: none; padding: 7px 13px; position: relative; text-shadow: rgb(255, 255, 255) 0px 1px; vertical-align: middle; white-space: nowrap; width: 150px;" type="button"><span class="buttonText">Edit</span></button></div>
</div>
<div aria-disabled="true" class="item ui-draggable ui-draggable-disabled ui-state-disabled gridSortable" style="-webkit-transform: translateZ(0px); float: left; margin: 10px 5px 0px; width: 170px;">
<div class="Board Module boardCoverImage draggable noContext" data-component-type="1" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.219608) 0px 1px 2px 0px; background: rgb(255, 255, 255); border-bottom-left-radius: 6px; border-bottom-right-radius: 6px; border-top-left-radius: 6px; border-top-right-radius: 6px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.219608) 0px 1px 2px 0px; float: left; position: relative; width: 170px;">
<a class="boardLinkWrapper" data-element-type="36" href="https://www.pinterest.com/lucretiamccloud/the-heaven-of-the-heavensthe-earththe-seas/" style="color: #555555; display: block; font-weight: bold; padding: 10px 10px 0px; position: relative; text-decoration: none;"><div class="boardName" style="-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased; font-size: 14px; height: auto; line-height: 18px; margin: 3px 1px 6px; overflow: hidden; position: relative; text-overflow: ellipsis; white-space: nowrap;">
<div class="BoardIcons Module pinCreate" style="display: inline-block; float: right; height: 16px;">
</div>
<div class="name" style="overflow: hidden; text-overflow: ellipsis;">
The Heaven of the heavens...the earth...the seas</div>
</div>
<div class="boardCoverWrapper" style="background-color: #eeeeee; clear: both; height: 101.38889px; overflow: hidden; position: relative; width: 150px;">
<span class="hoverMask" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; -webkit-transition: background 0.04s linear; border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; bottom: 0px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; left: 0px; position: absolute; right: 0px; top: 0px; transition: background 0.04s linear; z-index: 100;"></span><img alt="The Heaven of the heavens...the earth...the seas / “By the word of Jehovah the heavens themselves were made, and by the spirit of his mouth all their army.” Ps. 33:6...“You alone are Jehovah; you made the heavens, yes, the heaven of the heavens and all their army, the earth and all that is on it, the seas and all that is in them. And you preserve all of them alive, and the army of the heavens are bowing down to you." Nehemiah 9:6. / by Lucretia McCloud" class="boardCover" data-load-state="pending" src="https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/custom_covers/216x146/413205403250376628_1427918070.jpg" style="border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; border: 0px; clear: both; height: 101.38889px; max-width: 100%; vertical-align: middle; width: 150px;" /><span class="boardPinCount" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.2) 0px 0px 5px inset, rgba(255, 255, 255, 0.298039) 0px 1px 0px; -webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased; background-color: rgba(68, 68, 68, 0.701961); border-bottom-left-radius: 2px; border-bottom-right-radius: 2px; border-top-left-radius: 2px; border-top-right-radius: 2px; bottom: 3px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.2) 0px 0px 5px inset, rgba(255, 255, 255, 0.298039) 0px 1px 0px; color: white; left: 3px; padding: 3px 6px; position: absolute; text-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.701961) 0px -1px 0px;"><div class="Module PinCount">
<span class="pinIcon" style="background: url(https://s-passets-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/webapp/style/sprites/webapp-common-above_the_fold-2x-6bfc28da.png) -158px -130px / 214px 199px no-repeat; display: inline-block; height: 9px; margin-right: 3px; width: 7px;"></span>473</div>
</span></div>
<ul class="boardThumbs" style="margin: 4px 0px; padding: 0px;">
<li style="display: inline; float: left; height: 47.33333px; list-style: none; margin-left: 0px; padding: 0px; position: relative; width: 47.33333px;"><span class="hoverMask" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; -webkit-transition: background 0.04s linear; border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; bottom: 0px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; left: 0px; position: absolute; right: 0px; top: 0px; transition: background 0.04s linear; z-index: 100;"></span><img class="thumb" data-load-state="pending" src="https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/75x75/b7/21/92/b72192f026c719b5d1b7ecaaf8557416.jpg" style="border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; border: 0px; height: 47.33333px; max-width: 100%; vertical-align: middle; width: 47.33333px;" /></li>
<li style="display: inline; float: left; height: 47.33333px; list-style: none; margin-left: 4px; padding: 0px; position: relative; width: 47.33333px;"><span class="hoverMask" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; -webkit-transition: background 0.04s linear; border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; bottom: 0px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; left: 0px; position: absolute; right: 0px; top: 0px; transition: background 0.04s linear; z-index: 100;"></span><img class="thumb" data-load-state="pending" src="https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/75x75/e3/e1/cf/e3e1cf4a68d61b358d3acd7aa23dde43.jpg" style="border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; border: 0px; height: 47.33333px; max-width: 100%; vertical-align: middle; width: 47.33333px;" /></li>
<li style="display: inline; float: left; height: 47.33333px; list-style: none; margin-left: 4px; padding: 0px; position: relative; width: 47.33333px;"><span class="hoverMask" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; -webkit-transition: background 0.04s linear; border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; bottom: 0px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; left: 0px; position: absolute; right: 0px; top: 0px; transition: background 0.04s linear; z-index: 100;"></span><img class="thumb" data-load-state="pending" src="https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/75x75/c8/e5/ad/c8e5ad2f43a7bb383209dff2ce311b8e.jpg" style="border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; border: 0px; height: 47.33333px; max-width: 100%; vertical-align: middle; width: 47.33333px;" /></li>
</ul>
</a><button class="Button Module ShowModalButton boardEditButton btn hasText rounded" style="background: linear-gradient(rgb(255, 255, 255), rgb(240, 240, 240)) rgb(240, 240, 240); border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; border: 1px solid rgb(204, 204, 204); color: #5f5f5f; cursor: pointer; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Helvetica, 'ヒラギノ角ゴ Pro W3', 'Hiragino Kaku Gothic Pro', メイリオ, Meiryo, 'MS Pゴシック', arial, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; font-weight: bold; margin: 0px 10px 10px; outline: none; padding: 7px 13px; position: relative; text-shadow: rgb(255, 255, 255) 0px 1px; vertical-align: middle; white-space: nowrap; width: 150px;" type="button"><span class="buttonText">Edit</span></button></div>
</div>
<div aria-disabled="true" class="item ui-draggable ui-draggable-disabled ui-state-disabled gridSortable" style="-webkit-transform: translateZ(0px); float: left; margin: 10px 5px 0px; width: 170px;">
<div class="Board Module boardCoverImage draggable noContext" data-component-type="1" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.219608) 0px 1px 2px 0px; background: rgb(255, 255, 255); border-bottom-left-radius: 6px; border-bottom-right-radius: 6px; border-top-left-radius: 6px; border-top-right-radius: 6px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.219608) 0px 1px 2px 0px; float: left; position: relative; width: 170px;">
<a class="boardLinkWrapper" data-element-type="36" href="https://www.pinterest.com/lucretiamccloud/smiles/" style="color: #555555; display: block; font-weight: bold; padding: 10px 10px 0px; position: relative; text-decoration: none;"><div class="boardName" style="-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased; font-size: 14px; height: auto; line-height: 18px; margin: 3px 1px 6px; overflow: hidden; position: relative; text-overflow: ellipsis; white-space: nowrap;">
<div class="BoardIcons Module pinCreate" style="display: inline-block; float: right; height: 16px;">
</div>
<div class="name" style="overflow: hidden; text-overflow: ellipsis;">
Smiles</div>
</div>
<div class="boardCoverWrapper" style="background-color: #eeeeee; clear: both; height: 101.38889px; overflow: hidden; position: relative; width: 150px;">
<span class="hoverMask" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; -webkit-transition: background 0.04s linear; border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; bottom: 0px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; left: 0px; position: absolute; right: 0px; top: 0px; transition: background 0.04s linear; z-index: 100;"></span><img alt="Smiles / Creatures great and small imitate their "Happy God." 1 Timothy 1:11. / by Lucretia McCloud" class="boardCover" data-load-state="pending" src="https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/custom_covers/216x146/413205403250328536_1427918100.jpg" style="border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; border: 0px; clear: both; height: 101.38889px; max-width: 100%; vertical-align: middle; width: 150px;" /><span class="boardPinCount" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.2) 0px 0px 5px inset, rgba(255, 255, 255, 0.298039) 0px 1px 0px; -webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased; background-color: rgba(68, 68, 68, 0.701961); border-bottom-left-radius: 2px; border-bottom-right-radius: 2px; border-top-left-radius: 2px; border-top-right-radius: 2px; bottom: 3px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.2) 0px 0px 5px inset, rgba(255, 255, 255, 0.298039) 0px 1px 0px; color: white; left: 3px; padding: 3px 6px; position: absolute; text-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.701961) 0px -1px 0px;"><div class="Module PinCount">
<span class="pinIcon" style="background: url(https://s-passets-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/webapp/style/sprites/webapp-common-above_the_fold-2x-6bfc28da.png) -158px -130px / 214px 199px no-repeat; display: inline-block; height: 9px; margin-right: 3px; width: 7px;"></span>349</div>
</span></div>
<ul class="boardThumbs" style="margin: 4px 0px; padding: 0px;">
<li style="display: inline; float: left; height: 47.33333px; list-style: none; margin-left: 0px; padding: 0px; position: relative; width: 47.33333px;"><span class="hoverMask" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; -webkit-transition: background 0.04s linear; border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; bottom: 0px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; left: 0px; position: absolute; right: 0px; top: 0px; transition: background 0.04s linear; z-index: 100;"></span><img class="thumb" data-load-state="pending" src="https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/75x75/e0/1f/c7/e01fc723ea8fe0bcaf3c44d187c18399.jpg" style="border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; border: 0px; height: 47.33333px; max-width: 100%; vertical-align: middle; width: 47.33333px;" /></li>
<li style="display: inline; float: left; height: 47.33333px; list-style: none; margin-left: 4px; padding: 0px; position: relative; width: 47.33333px;"><span class="hoverMask" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; -webkit-transition: background 0.04s linear; border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; bottom: 0px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; left: 0px; position: absolute; right: 0px; top: 0px; transition: background 0.04s linear; z-index: 100;"></span><img class="thumb" data-load-state="pending" src="https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/75x75/77/59/6b/77596bda9b66157fe52ff3c927c81512.jpg" style="border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; border: 0px; height: 47.33333px; max-width: 100%; vertical-align: middle; width: 47.33333px;" /></li>
<li style="display: inline; float: left; height: 47.33333px; list-style: none; margin-left: 4px; padding: 0px; position: relative; width: 47.33333px;"><span class="hoverMask" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; -webkit-transition: background 0.04s linear; border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; bottom: 0px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; left: 0px; position: absolute; right: 0px; top: 0px; transition: background 0.04s linear; z-index: 100;"></span><img class="thumb" data-load-state="pending" src="https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/75x75/de/c6/d0/dec6d0cd49eed10988bda9fba2e93867.jpg" style="border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; border: 0px; height: 47.33333px; max-width: 100%; vertical-align: middle; width: 47.33333px;" /></li>
</ul>
</a><button class="Button Module ShowModalButton boardEditButton btn hasText rounded" style="background: linear-gradient(rgb(255, 255, 255), rgb(240, 240, 240)) rgb(240, 240, 240); border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; border: 1px solid rgb(204, 204, 204); color: #5f5f5f; cursor: pointer; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Helvetica, 'ヒラギノ角ゴ Pro W3', 'Hiragino Kaku Gothic Pro', メイリオ, Meiryo, 'MS Pゴシック', arial, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; font-weight: bold; margin: 0px 10px 10px; outline: none; padding: 7px 13px; position: relative; text-shadow: rgb(255, 255, 255) 0px 1px; vertical-align: middle; white-space: nowrap; width: 150px;" type="button"><span class="buttonText">Edit</span></button></div>
</div>
<div aria-disabled="true" class="item ui-draggable ui-draggable-disabled ui-state-disabled gridSortable" style="-webkit-transform: translateZ(0px); float: left; margin: 10px 5px 0px; width: 170px;">
<div class="Board Module boardCoverImage draggable noContext" data-component-type="1" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.219608) 0px 1px 2px 0px; background: rgb(255, 255, 255); border-bottom-left-radius: 6px; border-bottom-right-radius: 6px; border-top-left-radius: 6px; border-top-right-radius: 6px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.219608) 0px 1px 2px 0px; float: left; position: relative; width: 170px;">
<a class="boardLinkWrapper" data-element-type="36" href="https://www.pinterest.com/lucretiamccloud/health-and-wellness/" style="color: #555555; display: block; font-weight: bold; padding: 10px 10px 0px; position: relative; text-decoration: none;"><div class="boardName" style="-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased; font-size: 14px; height: auto; line-height: 18px; margin: 3px 1px 6px; overflow: hidden; position: relative; text-overflow: ellipsis; white-space: nowrap;">
<div class="BoardIcons Module pinCreate" style="display: inline-block; float: right; height: 16px;">
</div>
<div class="name" style="overflow: hidden; text-overflow: ellipsis;">
Health and Wellness</div>
</div>
<div class="boardCoverWrapper" style="background-color: #eeeeee; clear: both; height: 101.38889px; overflow: hidden; position: relative; width: 150px;">
<span class="hoverMask" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; -webkit-transition: background 0.04s linear; border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; bottom: 0px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; left: 0px; position: absolute; right: 0px; top: 0px; transition: background 0.04s linear; z-index: 100;"></span><img alt="Health and Wellness / "A joyful heart is good medicine, but a crushed spirit saps one’s strength." Proverbs 17:22...Good/sometimes remedial effects are produced through cultivating/displaying love, joy, peace, long-suffering, kindness, goodness, faith, mildness, and self-control, fruitages of God’s spirit found at Gal. 5:22,23...Also, "whatever things are true,...of serious concern,...righteous,...chaste,...lovable,...well-spoken-of,...virtuous, and...praiseworthy, continue considering these things." Phil. 4:8.
/ by Lucretia McCloud" class="boardCover" data-load-state="pending" src="https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/custom_covers/216x146/413205403250333164_1427917975.jpg" style="border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; border: 0px; clear: both; height: 101.38889px; max-width: 100%; vertical-align: middle; width: 150px;" /><span class="boardPinCount" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.2) 0px 0px 5px inset, rgba(255, 255, 255, 0.298039) 0px 1px 0px; -webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased; background-color: rgba(68, 68, 68, 0.701961); border-bottom-left-radius: 2px; border-bottom-right-radius: 2px; border-top-left-radius: 2px; border-top-right-radius: 2px; bottom: 3px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.2) 0px 0px 5px inset, rgba(255, 255, 255, 0.298039) 0px 1px 0px; color: white; left: 3px; padding: 3px 6px; position: absolute; text-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.701961) 0px -1px 0px;"><div class="Module PinCount">
<span class="pinIcon" style="background: url(https://s-passets-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/webapp/style/sprites/webapp-common-above_the_fold-2x-6bfc28da.png) -158px -130px / 214px 199px no-repeat; display: inline-block; height: 9px; margin-right: 3px; width: 7px;"></span>418</div>
</span></div>
<ul class="boardThumbs" style="margin: 4px 0px; padding: 0px;">
<li style="display: inline; float: left; height: 47.33333px; list-style: none; margin-left: 0px; padding: 0px; position: relative; width: 47.33333px;"><span class="hoverMask" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; -webkit-transition: background 0.04s linear; border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; bottom: 0px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; left: 0px; position: absolute; right: 0px; top: 0px; transition: background 0.04s linear; z-index: 100;"></span><img class="thumb" data-load-state="pending" src="https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/75x75/25/f5/a1/25f5a1ab3e961e5f6ddd8100ca33f49e.jpg" style="border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; border: 0px; height: 47.33333px; max-width: 100%; vertical-align: middle; width: 47.33333px;" /></li>
<li style="display: inline; float: left; height: 47.33333px; list-style: none; margin-left: 4px; padding: 0px; position: relative; width: 47.33333px;"><span class="hoverMask" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; -webkit-transition: background 0.04s linear; border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; bottom: 0px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; left: 0px; position: absolute; right: 0px; top: 0px; transition: background 0.04s linear; z-index: 100;"></span><img class="thumb" data-load-state="pending" src="https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/75x75/2a/a3/43/2aa3433934e5066980d87a9db8009645.jpg" style="border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; border: 0px; height: 47.33333px; max-width: 100%; vertical-align: middle; width: 47.33333px;" /></li>
<li style="display: inline; float: left; height: 47.33333px; list-style: none; margin-left: 4px; padding: 0px; position: relative; width: 47.33333px;"><span class="hoverMask" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; -webkit-transition: background 0.04s linear; border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; bottom: 0px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; left: 0px; position: absolute; right: 0px; top: 0px; transition: background 0.04s linear; z-index: 100;"></span><img class="thumb" data-load-state="pending" src="https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/75x75/6b/43/b0/6b43b082f16add7458396844353ce964.jpg" style="border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; border: 0px; height: 47.33333px; max-width: 100%; vertical-align: middle; width: 47.33333px;" /></li>
</ul>
</a><button class="Button Module ShowModalButton boardEditButton btn hasText rounded" style="background: linear-gradient(rgb(255, 255, 255), rgb(240, 240, 240)) rgb(240, 240, 240); border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; border: 1px solid rgb(204, 204, 204); color: #5f5f5f; cursor: pointer; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Helvetica, 'ヒラギノ角ゴ Pro W3', 'Hiragino Kaku Gothic Pro', メイリオ, Meiryo, 'MS Pゴシック', arial, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; font-weight: bold; margin: 0px 10px 10px; outline: none; padding: 7px 13px; position: relative; text-shadow: rgb(255, 255, 255) 0px 1px; vertical-align: middle; white-space: nowrap; width: 150px;" type="button"><span class="buttonText">Edit</span></button></div>
</div>
<div aria-disabled="true" class="item ui-draggable ui-draggable-disabled ui-state-disabled gridSortable" style="-webkit-transform: translateZ(0px); float: left; margin: 10px 5px 0px; width: 170px;">
<div class="Board Module boardCoverImage draggable noContext" data-component-type="1" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.219608) 0px 1px 2px 0px; background: rgb(255, 255, 255); border-bottom-left-radius: 6px; border-bottom-right-radius: 6px; border-top-left-radius: 6px; border-top-right-radius: 6px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.219608) 0px 1px 2px 0px; float: left; position: relative; width: 170px;">
<a class="boardLinkWrapper" data-element-type="36" href="https://www.pinterest.com/lucretiamccloud/ate-8-to-great/" style="color: #555555; display: block; font-weight: bold; padding: 10px 10px 0px; position: relative; text-decoration: none;"><div class="boardName" style="-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased; font-size: 14px; height: auto; line-height: 18px; margin: 3px 1px 6px; overflow: hidden; position: relative; text-overflow: ellipsis; white-space: nowrap;">
<div class="BoardIcons Module pinCreate" style="display: inline-block; float: right; height: 16px;">
</div>
<div class="name" style="overflow: hidden; text-overflow: ellipsis;">
(Ate) 8 to Great!</div>
</div>
<div class="boardCoverWrapper" style="background-color: #eeeeee; clear: both; height: 101.38889px; overflow: hidden; position: relative; width: 150px;">
<span class="hoverMask" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; -webkit-transition: background 0.04s linear; border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; bottom: 0px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; left: 0px; position: absolute; right: 0px; top: 0px; transition: background 0.04s linear; z-index: 100;"></span><img alt="(Ate) 8 to Great! / "He is making grass grow for the cattle and vegetation for mankind’s use, to grow food from the land and wine that makes man’s heart rejoice, oil that makes the face shine,
and bread that sustains the heart of mortal man." Psalm 104:14, 15.
/ by Lucretia McCloud" class="boardCover" data-load-state="pending" src="https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/custom_covers/216x146/413205403250328899_1427917895.jpg" style="border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; border: 0px; clear: both; height: 101.38889px; max-width: 100%; vertical-align: middle; width: 150px;" /><span class="boardPinCount" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.2) 0px 0px 5px inset, rgba(255, 255, 255, 0.298039) 0px 1px 0px; -webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased; background-color: rgba(68, 68, 68, 0.701961); border-bottom-left-radius: 2px; border-bottom-right-radius: 2px; border-top-left-radius: 2px; border-top-right-radius: 2px; bottom: 3px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.2) 0px 0px 5px inset, rgba(255, 255, 255, 0.298039) 0px 1px 0px; color: white; left: 3px; padding: 3px 6px; position: absolute; text-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.701961) 0px -1px 0px;"><div class="Module PinCount">
<span class="pinIcon" style="background: url(https://s-passets-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/webapp/style/sprites/webapp-common-above_the_fold-2x-6bfc28da.png) -158px -130px / 214px 199px no-repeat; display: inline-block; height: 9px; margin-right: 3px; width: 7px;"></span>894</div>
</span></div>
<ul class="boardThumbs" style="margin: 4px 0px; padding: 0px;">
<li style="display: inline; float: left; height: 47.33333px; list-style: none; margin-left: 0px; padding: 0px; position: relative; width: 47.33333px;"><span class="hoverMask" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; -webkit-transition: background 0.04s linear; border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; bottom: 0px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; left: 0px; position: absolute; right: 0px; top: 0px; transition: background 0.04s linear; z-index: 100;"></span><img class="thumb" data-load-state="pending" src="https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/75x75/7e/7c/3b/7e7c3b576d16fb45831857898c83cad0.jpg" style="border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; border: 0px; height: 47.33333px; max-width: 100%; vertical-align: middle; width: 47.33333px;" /></li>
<li style="display: inline; float: left; height: 47.33333px; list-style: none; margin-left: 4px; padding: 0px; position: relative; width: 47.33333px;"><span class="hoverMask" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; -webkit-transition: background 0.04s linear; border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; bottom: 0px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; left: 0px; position: absolute; right: 0px; top: 0px; transition: background 0.04s linear; z-index: 100;"></span><img class="thumb" data-load-state="pending" src="https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/75x75/f7/70/97/f770979062b0184cc1f6f8fbd3647db3.jpg" style="border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; border: 0px; height: 47.33333px; max-width: 100%; vertical-align: middle; width: 47.33333px;" /></li>
<li style="display: inline; float: left; height: 47.33333px; list-style: none; margin-left: 4px; padding: 0px; position: relative; width: 47.33333px;"><span class="hoverMask" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; -webkit-transition: background 0.04s linear; border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; bottom: 0px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; left: 0px; position: absolute; right: 0px; top: 0px; transition: background 0.04s linear; z-index: 100;"></span><img class="thumb" data-load-state="pending" src="https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/75x75/e7/6a/73/e76a73faa3a1c252d66ebccffca72f21.jpg" style="border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; border: 0px; height: 47.33333px; max-width: 100%; vertical-align: middle; width: 47.33333px;" /></li>
</ul>
</a><button class="Button Module ShowModalButton boardEditButton btn hasText rounded" style="background: linear-gradient(rgb(255, 255, 255), rgb(240, 240, 240)) rgb(240, 240, 240); border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; border: 1px solid rgb(204, 204, 204); color: #5f5f5f; cursor: pointer; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Helvetica, 'ヒラギノ角ゴ Pro W3', 'Hiragino Kaku Gothic Pro', メイリオ, Meiryo, 'MS Pゴシック', arial, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; font-weight: bold; margin: 0px 10px 10px; outline: none; padding: 7px 13px; position: relative; text-shadow: rgb(255, 255, 255) 0px 1px; vertical-align: middle; white-space: nowrap; width: 150px;" type="button"><span class="buttonText">Edit</span></button></div>
</div>
<div aria-disabled="true" class="item ui-draggable ui-draggable-disabled ui-state-disabled gridSortable" style="-webkit-transform: translateZ(0px); float: left; margin: 10px 5px 0px; width: 170px;">
<div class="Board Module boardCoverImage draggable noContext" data-component-type="1" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.219608) 0px 1px 2px 0px; background: rgb(255, 255, 255); border-bottom-left-radius: 6px; border-bottom-right-radius: 6px; border-top-left-radius: 6px; border-top-right-radius: 6px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.219608) 0px 1px 2px 0px; float: left; position: relative; width: 170px;">
<a class="boardLinkWrapper" data-element-type="36" href="https://www.pinterest.com/lucretiamccloud/never-says-enough/" style="color: #555555; display: block; font-weight: bold; padding: 10px 10px 0px; position: relative; text-decoration: none;"><div class="boardName" style="-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased; font-size: 14px; height: auto; line-height: 18px; margin: 3px 1px 6px; overflow: hidden; position: relative; text-overflow: ellipsis; white-space: nowrap;">
<div class="BoardIcons Module pinCreate" style="display: inline-block; float: right; height: 16px;">
</div>
<div class="name" style="overflow: hidden; text-overflow: ellipsis;">
Never says "Enough"!</div>
</div>
<div class="boardCoverWrapper" style="background-color: #eeeeee; clear: both; height: 101.38889px; overflow: hidden; position: relative; width: 150px;">
<span class="hoverMask" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; -webkit-transition: background 0.04s linear; border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; bottom: 0px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; left: 0px; position: absolute; right: 0px; top: 0px; transition: background 0.04s linear; z-index: 100;"></span><img alt="Never says "Enough"! / "There are three things that do not get satisfied, four that never say, “Enough!”—The Grave and a barren womb, a land that is deprived of water, and fire that never says, “Enough!”" Prov. 30:15, 16. . . However the Bible promises: "Death will be no more." Rev. 21:4... "For waters will burst forth in the wilderness, and streams in the desert plain." Isa. 35:6... "He gives the barren woman a home as a happy mother with children. Praise Jah!" Ps. 113.9.
/ by Lucretia McCloud" class="boardCover" data-load-state="pending" src="https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/custom_covers/216x146/413205403250354729_1427917803.jpg" style="border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; border: 0px; clear: both; height: 101.38889px; max-width: 100%; vertical-align: middle; width: 150px;" /><span class="boardPinCount" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.2) 0px 0px 5px inset, rgba(255, 255, 255, 0.298039) 0px 1px 0px; -webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased; background-color: rgba(68, 68, 68, 0.701961); border-bottom-left-radius: 2px; border-bottom-right-radius: 2px; border-top-left-radius: 2px; border-top-right-radius: 2px; bottom: 3px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.2) 0px 0px 5px inset, rgba(255, 255, 255, 0.298039) 0px 1px 0px; color: white; left: 3px; padding: 3px 6px; position: absolute; text-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.701961) 0px -1px 0px;"><div class="Module PinCount">
<span class="pinIcon" style="background: url(https://s-passets-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/webapp/style/sprites/webapp-common-above_the_fold-2x-6bfc28da.png) -158px -130px / 214px 199px no-repeat; display: inline-block; height: 9px; margin-right: 3px; width: 7px;"></span>169</div>
</span></div>
<ul class="boardThumbs" style="margin: 4px 0px; padding: 0px;">
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<a class="boardLinkWrapper" data-element-type="36" href="https://www.pinterest.com/lucretiamccloud/beyond-my-comprehension/" style="color: #555555; display: block; font-weight: bold; padding: 10px 10px 0px; position: relative; text-decoration: none;"><div class="boardName" style="-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased; font-size: 14px; height: auto; line-height: 18px; margin: 3px 1px 6px; overflow: hidden; position: relative; text-overflow: ellipsis; white-space: nowrap;">
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<div class="name" style="overflow: hidden; text-overflow: ellipsis;">
"Beyond my comprehension"</div>
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<span class="hoverMask" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; -webkit-transition: background 0.04s linear; border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; bottom: 0px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; left: 0px; position: absolute; right: 0px; top: 0px; transition: background 0.04s linear; z-index: 100;"></span><img alt=""Beyond my comprehension" / "I do not understand: The way of an eagle in the heavens, the way of a serpent on a rock, the way of a ship in the open sea, and the way of a man with a young woman." Pro 30:18,19. Yet, "This means everlasting life, their coming to know You, the Only True God, And the one whom you sent, Jesus Christ." John 17:3. So, "All the things that were written beforehand were written for our instruction, so that through our endurance and through the comfort from the Scriptures we might have hope." Rom 15:4 / by Lucretia McCloud" class="boardCover" data-load-state="pending" src="https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/216x146/e5/29/13/e529137b991ed4e8607044ebb08fe11f.jpg" style="border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; border: 0px; clear: both; height: 101.38889px; max-width: 100%; vertical-align: middle; width: 150px;" /><span class="boardPinCount" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.2) 0px 0px 5px inset, rgba(255, 255, 255, 0.298039) 0px 1px 0px; -webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased; background-color: rgba(68, 68, 68, 0.701961); border-bottom-left-radius: 2px; border-bottom-right-radius: 2px; border-top-left-radius: 2px; border-top-right-radius: 2px; bottom: 3px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.2) 0px 0px 5px inset, rgba(255, 255, 255, 0.298039) 0px 1px 0px; color: white; left: 3px; padding: 3px 6px; position: absolute; text-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.701961) 0px -1px 0px;"><div class="Module PinCount">
<span class="pinIcon" style="background: url(https://s-passets-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/webapp/style/sprites/webapp-common-above_the_fold-2x-6bfc28da.png) -158px -130px / 214px 199px no-repeat; display: inline-block; height: 9px; margin-right: 3px; width: 7px;"></span>78</div>
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<ul class="boardThumbs" style="margin: 4px 0px; padding: 0px;">
<li style="display: inline; float: left; height: 47.33333px; list-style: none; margin-left: 0px; padding: 0px; position: relative; width: 47.33333px;"><span class="hoverMask" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; -webkit-transition: background 0.04s linear; border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; bottom: 0px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; left: 0px; position: absolute; right: 0px; top: 0px; transition: background 0.04s linear; z-index: 100;"></span><img class="thumb" data-load-state="pending" src="https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/75x75/82/1c/31/821c31ae247314d4560974dd32f4bbc4.jpg" style="border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; border: 0px; height: 47.33333px; max-width: 100%; vertical-align: middle; width: 47.33333px;" /></li>
<li style="display: inline; float: left; height: 47.33333px; list-style: none; margin-left: 4px; padding: 0px; position: relative; width: 47.33333px;"><span class="hoverMask" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; -webkit-transition: background 0.04s linear; border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; bottom: 0px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; left: 0px; position: absolute; right: 0px; top: 0px; transition: background 0.04s linear; z-index: 100;"></span><img class="thumb" data-load-state="pending" src="https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/75x75/80/38/5f/80385f116a78ceca4ad74e3d429ece73.jpg" style="border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; border: 0px; height: 47.33333px; max-width: 100%; vertical-align: middle; width: 47.33333px;" /></li>
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<div aria-disabled="true" class="item ui-draggable ui-draggable-disabled ui-state-disabled gridSortable" style="-webkit-transform: translateZ(0px); float: left; margin: 10px 5px 0px; width: 170px;">
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<a class="boardLinkWrapper" data-element-type="36" href="https://www.pinterest.com/SerafiniAmelia/color-theory-therapy/" style="color: #555555; display: block; font-weight: bold; padding: 10px 10px 0px; position: relative; text-decoration: none;"><div class="boardName" style="-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased; font-size: 14px; height: auto; line-height: 18px; margin: 3px 1px 6px; overflow: hidden; position: relative; text-overflow: ellipsis; white-space: nowrap;">
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<span class="collaborativeIcon" style="background: url(https://s-passets-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/webapp/style/sprites/webapp-common-above_the_fold-2x-6bfc28da.png) -34px -167px / 214px 199px no-repeat; display: inline-block; height: 16px; margin-right: 0px; width: 16px;"></span></div>
<div class="name" style="overflow: hidden; text-overflow: ellipsis;">
Color Theory Therapy</div>
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<div class="boardCoverWrapper" style="background-color: #eeeeee; clear: both; height: 101.38889px; overflow: hidden; position: relative; width: 150px;">
<span class="hoverMask" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; -webkit-transition: background 0.04s linear; border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; bottom: 0px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; left: 0px; position: absolute; right: 0px; top: 0px; transition: background 0.04s linear; z-index: 100;"></span><img alt="Color Theory Therapy / Explore Color Therapy- A form of phototherapy using color to influence health. Color~Light~ART~Fashion~Nature~ Because this is a Fusion of Color Board __Please Limit Your Pins To Small Groupings__Reviewing The Board Will Limit Duplicate Pins__Excessive Duplicates Will Be Deleted__The Board Is Becoming A True Fusion Of Color And Style, Thanks To All Whom Have Supported This Fusion Of Color__Thank You. Serafini Amelia
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<span class="pinIcon" style="background: url(https://s-passets-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/webapp/style/sprites/webapp-common-above_the_fold-2x-6bfc28da.png) -158px -130px / 214px 199px no-repeat; display: inline-block; height: 9px; margin-right: 3px; width: 7px;"></span>11,023</div>
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<ul class="boardThumbs" style="margin: 4px 0px; padding: 0px;">
<li style="display: inline; float: left; height: 47.33333px; list-style: none; margin-left: 0px; padding: 0px; position: relative; width: 47.33333px;"><span class="hoverMask" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; -webkit-transition: background 0.04s linear; border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; bottom: 0px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; left: 0px; position: absolute; right: 0px; top: 0px; transition: background 0.04s linear; z-index: 100;"></span><img class="thumb" data-load-state="pending" src="https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/75x75/f1/24/54/f12454d9d7206eeb8340a239ca7bf512.jpg" style="border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; border: 0px; height: 47.33333px; max-width: 100%; vertical-align: middle; width: 47.33333px;" /></li>
<li style="display: inline; float: left; height: 47.33333px; list-style: none; margin-left: 4px; padding: 0px; position: relative; width: 47.33333px;"><span class="hoverMask" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; -webkit-transition: background 0.04s linear; border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; bottom: 0px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; left: 0px; position: absolute; right: 0px; top: 0px; transition: background 0.04s linear; z-index: 100;"></span><img class="thumb" data-load-state="pending" src="https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/75x75/f4/76/1e/f4761ec2e0c66ec4d7ca69725fd1474d.jpg" style="border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; border: 0px; height: 47.33333px; max-width: 100%; vertical-align: middle; width: 47.33333px;" /></li>
<li style="display: inline; float: left; height: 47.33333px; list-style: none; margin-left: 4px; padding: 0px; position: relative; width: 47.33333px;"><span class="hoverMask" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; -webkit-transition: background 0.04s linear; border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; bottom: 0px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; left: 0px; position: absolute; right: 0px; top: 0px; transition: background 0.04s linear; z-index: 100;"></span><img class="thumb" data-load-state="pending" src="https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/75x75/d9/59/4a/d9594acc69582946cd9e20c74ed6040f.jpg" style="border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; border: 0px; height: 47.33333px; max-width: 100%; vertical-align: middle; width: 47.33333px;" /></li>
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</a><button class="Button Module ShowModalButton boardEditButton btn hasText rounded" style="background: linear-gradient(rgb(255, 255, 255), rgb(240, 240, 240)) rgb(240, 240, 240); border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; border: 1px solid rgb(204, 204, 204); color: #5f5f5f; cursor: pointer; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Helvetica, 'ヒラギノ角ゴ Pro W3', 'Hiragino Kaku Gothic Pro', メイリオ, Meiryo, 'MS Pゴシック', arial, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; font-weight: bold; margin: 0px 10px 10px; outline: none; padding: 7px 13px; position: relative; text-shadow: rgb(255, 255, 255) 0px 1px; vertical-align: middle; white-space: nowrap; width: 150px;" type="button"><span class="buttonText">Edit</span></button></div>
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<div aria-disabled="true" class="item ui-draggable ui-draggable-disabled ui-state-disabled gridSortable" style="-webkit-transform: translateZ(0px); float: left; margin: 10px 5px 0px; width: 170px;">
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<a class="boardLinkWrapper" data-element-type="36" href="https://www.pinterest.com/lucretiamccloud/inexcusable-extraordinary-creative-works/" style="color: #555555; display: block; font-weight: bold; padding: 10px 10px 0px; position: relative; text-decoration: none;"><div class="boardName" style="-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased; font-size: 14px; height: auto; line-height: 18px; margin: 3px 1px 6px; overflow: hidden; position: relative; text-overflow: ellipsis; white-space: nowrap;">
<div class="BoardIcons Module pinCreate" style="display: inline-block; float: right; height: 16px;">
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<div class="name" style="overflow: hidden; text-overflow: ellipsis;">
"Inexcusable!" ... Extraordinary Creative Works</div>
</div>
<div class="boardCoverWrapper" style="background-color: #eeeeee; clear: both; height: 101.38889px; overflow: hidden; position: relative; width: 150px;">
<span class="hoverMask" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; -webkit-transition: background 0.04s linear; border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; bottom: 0px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; left: 0px; position: absolute; right: 0px; top: 0px; transition: background 0.04s linear; z-index: 100;"></span><img alt=""Inexcusable!" ... Extraordinary Creative Works / "For his invisible Qualities are clearly seen from the World’s Creation Onward, because they are perceived by the things made, even his Eternal Power and Godship, so that they are Inexcusable." Romans 1:20 / by Lucretia McCloud" class="boardCover" data-load-state="pending" src="https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/custom_covers/216x146/413205403250357104_1404221223.jpg" style="border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; border: 0px; clear: both; height: 101.38889px; max-width: 100%; vertical-align: middle; width: 150px;" /><span class="boardPinCount" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.2) 0px 0px 5px inset, rgba(255, 255, 255, 0.298039) 0px 1px 0px; -webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased; background-color: rgba(68, 68, 68, 0.701961); border-bottom-left-radius: 2px; border-bottom-right-radius: 2px; border-top-left-radius: 2px; border-top-right-radius: 2px; bottom: 3px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.2) 0px 0px 5px inset, rgba(255, 255, 255, 0.298039) 0px 1px 0px; color: white; left: 3px; padding: 3px 6px; position: absolute; text-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.701961) 0px -1px 0px;"><div class="Module PinCount">
<span class="pinIcon" style="background: url(https://s-passets-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/webapp/style/sprites/webapp-common-above_the_fold-2x-6bfc28da.png) -158px -130px / 214px 199px no-repeat; display: inline-block; height: 9px; margin-right: 3px; width: 7px;"></span>1,388</div>
</span></div>
<ul class="boardThumbs" style="margin: 4px 0px; padding: 0px;">
<li style="display: inline; float: left; height: 47.33333px; list-style: none; margin-left: 0px; padding: 0px; position: relative; width: 47.33333px;"><span class="hoverMask" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; -webkit-transition: background 0.04s linear; border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; bottom: 0px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; left: 0px; position: absolute; right: 0px; top: 0px; transition: background 0.04s linear; z-index: 100;"></span><img class="thumb" data-load-state="pending" src="https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/75x75/60/f1/8a/60f18afdd339db7b36582dc03dbebffc.jpg" style="border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; border: 0px; height: 47.33333px; max-width: 100%; vertical-align: middle; width: 47.33333px;" /></li>
<li style="display: inline; float: left; height: 47.33333px; list-style: none; margin-left: 4px; padding: 0px; position: relative; width: 47.33333px;"><span class="hoverMask" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; -webkit-transition: background 0.04s linear; border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; bottom: 0px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; left: 0px; position: absolute; right: 0px; top: 0px; transition: background 0.04s linear; z-index: 100;"></span><img class="thumb" data-load-state="pending" src="https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/75x75/cb/91/7a/cb917aedc91faeb4be87c1d826484596.jpg" style="border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; border: 0px; height: 47.33333px; max-width: 100%; vertical-align: middle; width: 47.33333px;" /></li>
<li style="display: inline; float: left; height: 47.33333px; list-style: none; margin-left: 4px; padding: 0px; position: relative; width: 47.33333px;"><span class="hoverMask" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; -webkit-transition: background 0.04s linear; border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; bottom: 0px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; left: 0px; position: absolute; right: 0px; top: 0px; transition: background 0.04s linear; z-index: 100;"></span><img class="thumb" data-load-state="pending" src="https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/75x75/b5/db/73/b5db73932ceeeb9833f740fc5dab848e.jpg" style="border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; border: 0px; height: 47.33333px; max-width: 100%; vertical-align: middle; width: 47.33333px;" /></li>
</ul>
</a><button class="Button Module ShowModalButton boardEditButton btn hasText rounded" style="background: linear-gradient(rgb(255, 255, 255), rgb(240, 240, 240)) rgb(240, 240, 240); border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; border: 1px solid rgb(204, 204, 204); color: #5f5f5f; cursor: pointer; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Helvetica, 'ヒラギノ角ゴ Pro W3', 'Hiragino Kaku Gothic Pro', メイリオ, Meiryo, 'MS Pゴシック', arial, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; font-weight: bold; margin: 0px 10px 10px; outline: none; padding: 7px 13px; position: relative; text-shadow: rgb(255, 255, 255) 0px 1px; vertical-align: middle; white-space: nowrap; width: 150px;" type="button"><span class="buttonText">Edit</span></button></div>
</div>
<div aria-disabled="true" class="item ui-draggable ui-draggable-disabled ui-state-disabled gridSortable" style="-webkit-transform: translateZ(0px); float: left; margin: 10px 5px 0px; width: 170px;">
<div class="Board Module boardCoverImage draggable noContext" data-component-type="1" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.219608) 0px 1px 2px 0px; background: rgb(255, 255, 255); border-bottom-left-radius: 6px; border-bottom-right-radius: 6px; border-top-left-radius: 6px; border-top-right-radius: 6px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.219608) 0px 1px 2px 0px; float: left; position: relative; width: 170px;">
<a class="boardLinkWrapper" data-element-type="36" href="https://www.pinterest.com/moriahschmit/what-a-beautiful-world/" style="color: #555555; display: block; font-weight: bold; padding: 10px 10px 0px; position: relative; text-decoration: none;"><div class="boardName" style="-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased; font-size: 14px; height: auto; line-height: 18px; margin: 3px 1px 6px; overflow: hidden; position: relative; text-overflow: ellipsis; white-space: nowrap;">
<div class="BoardIcons Module pinCreate" style="display: inline-block; float: right; height: 16px;">
<span class="collaborativeIcon" style="background: url(https://s-passets-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/webapp/style/sprites/webapp-common-above_the_fold-2x-6bfc28da.png) -34px -167px / 214px 199px no-repeat; display: inline-block; height: 16px; margin-right: 0px; width: 16px;"></span></div>
<div class="name" style="overflow: hidden; text-overflow: ellipsis;">
What a beautiful world :)</div>
</div>
<div class="boardCoverWrapper" style="background-color: #eeeeee; clear: both; height: 101.38889px; overflow: hidden; position: relative; width: 150px;">
<span class="hoverMask" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; -webkit-transition: background 0.04s linear; border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; bottom: 0px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; left: 0px; position: absolute; right: 0px; top: 0px; transition: background 0.04s linear; z-index: 100;"></span><img alt="What a beautiful world :) / Pin as much as you'd like but please no spam :) / by Moriah Schmit" class="boardCover" data-load-state="pending" src="https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/216x146/c6/1b/5a/c61b5aa714799d24eb0f2f672e46c820.jpg" style="border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; border: 0px; clear: both; height: 101.38889px; max-width: 100%; vertical-align: middle; width: 150px;" /><span class="boardPinCount" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.2) 0px 0px 5px inset, rgba(255, 255, 255, 0.298039) 0px 1px 0px; -webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased; background-color: rgba(68, 68, 68, 0.701961); border-bottom-left-radius: 2px; border-bottom-right-radius: 2px; border-top-left-radius: 2px; border-top-right-radius: 2px; bottom: 3px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.2) 0px 0px 5px inset, rgba(255, 255, 255, 0.298039) 0px 1px 0px; color: white; left: 3px; padding: 3px 6px; position: absolute; text-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.701961) 0px -1px 0px;"><div class="Module PinCount">
<span class="pinIcon" style="background: url(https://s-passets-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/webapp/style/sprites/webapp-common-above_the_fold-2x-6bfc28da.png) -158px -130px / 214px 199px no-repeat; display: inline-block; height: 9px; margin-right: 3px; width: 7px;"></span>19,497</div>
</span></div>
<ul class="boardThumbs" style="margin: 4px 0px; padding: 0px;">
<li style="display: inline; float: left; height: 47.33333px; list-style: none; margin-left: 0px; padding: 0px; position: relative; width: 47.33333px;"><span class="hoverMask" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; -webkit-transition: background 0.04s linear; border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; bottom: 0px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; left: 0px; position: absolute; right: 0px; top: 0px; transition: background 0.04s linear; z-index: 100;"></span><img class="thumb" data-load-state="pending" src="https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/75x75/5a/14/96/5a1496a297859c69d02edba9f3b57dbe.jpg" style="border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; border: 0px; height: 47.33333px; max-width: 100%; vertical-align: middle; width: 47.33333px;" /></li>
<li style="display: inline; float: left; height: 47.33333px; list-style: none; margin-left: 4px; padding: 0px; position: relative; width: 47.33333px;"><span class="hoverMask" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; -webkit-transition: background 0.04s linear; border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; bottom: 0px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; left: 0px; position: absolute; right: 0px; top: 0px; transition: background 0.04s linear; z-index: 100;"></span><img class="thumb" data-load-state="pending" src="https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/75x75/7b/c7/5f/7bc75fdfbbaaff87d07f3ccdffae054d.jpg" style="border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; border: 0px; height: 47.33333px; max-width: 100%; vertical-align: middle; width: 47.33333px;" /></li>
<li style="display: inline; float: left; height: 47.33333px; list-style: none; margin-left: 4px; padding: 0px; position: relative; width: 47.33333px;"><span class="hoverMask" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; -webkit-transition: background 0.04s linear; border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; bottom: 0px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; left: 0px; position: absolute; right: 0px; top: 0px; transition: background 0.04s linear; z-index: 100;"></span><img class="thumb" data-load-state="pending" src="https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/75x75/18/e4/d1/18e4d104fac6751d70d74a98558988db.jpg" style="border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; border: 0px; height: 47.33333px; max-width: 100%; vertical-align: middle; width: 47.33333px;" /></li>
</ul>
</a><button class="Button Module ShowModalButton boardEditButton btn hasText rounded" style="background: linear-gradient(rgb(255, 255, 255), rgb(240, 240, 240)) rgb(240, 240, 240); border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; border: 1px solid rgb(204, 204, 204); color: #5f5f5f; cursor: pointer; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Helvetica, 'ヒラギノ角ゴ Pro W3', 'Hiragino Kaku Gothic Pro', メイリオ, Meiryo, 'MS Pゴシック', arial, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; font-weight: bold; margin: 0px 10px 10px; outline: none; padding: 7px 13px; position: relative; text-shadow: rgb(255, 255, 255) 0px 1px; vertical-align: middle; white-space: nowrap; width: 150px;" type="button"><span class="buttonText">Edit</span></button></div>
</div>
<div aria-disabled="true" class="item ui-draggable ui-draggable-disabled ui-state-disabled gridSortable" style="-webkit-transform: translateZ(0px); float: left; margin: 10px 5px 0px; width: 170px;">
<div class="Board Module boardCoverImage draggable noContext" data-component-type="1" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.219608) 0px 1px 2px 0px; background: rgb(255, 255, 255); border-bottom-left-radius: 6px; border-bottom-right-radius: 6px; border-top-left-radius: 6px; border-top-right-radius: 6px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.219608) 0px 1px 2px 0px; float: left; position: relative; width: 170px;">
<a class="boardLinkWrapper" data-element-type="36" href="https://www.pinterest.com/lucretiamccloud/earths-ruinsearths-beauty/" style="color: #555555; display: block; font-weight: bold; padding: 10px 10px 0px; position: relative; text-decoration: none;"><div class="boardName" style="-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased; font-size: 14px; height: auto; line-height: 18px; margin: 3px 1px 6px; overflow: hidden; position: relative; text-overflow: ellipsis; white-space: nowrap;">
<div class="BoardIcons Module pinCreate" style="display: inline-block; float: right; height: 16px;">
</div>
<div class="name" style="overflow: hidden; text-overflow: ellipsis;">
Earth's Ruins/Earth's Beauty</div>
</div>
<div class="boardCoverWrapper" style="background-color: #eeeeee; clear: both; height: 101.38889px; overflow: hidden; position: relative; width: 150px;">
<span class="hoverMask" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; -webkit-transition: background 0.04s linear; border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; bottom: 0px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; left: 0px; position: absolute; right: 0px; top: 0px; transition: background 0.04s linear; z-index: 100;"></span><img alt="Earth's Ruins/Earth's Beauty / "Every good gift and every perfect present is from above, coming down from the Father of the celestial lights, who does not vary or change like the shifting shadows." "As for the heavens, they belong to Jehovah, but the earth he has given to the sons of men." Ps. 115:16. "And the appointed time came ... to bring to ruin those ruining the earth.” Rev. 11:18 / by Lucretia McCloud" class="boardCover" data-load-state="pending" src="https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/custom_covers/216x146/413205403250356425_1405684600.jpg" style="border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; border: 0px; clear: both; height: 101.38889px; max-width: 100%; vertical-align: middle; width: 150px;" /><span class="boardPinCount" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.2) 0px 0px 5px inset, rgba(255, 255, 255, 0.298039) 0px 1px 0px; -webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased; background-color: rgba(68, 68, 68, 0.701961); border-bottom-left-radius: 2px; border-bottom-right-radius: 2px; border-top-left-radius: 2px; border-top-right-radius: 2px; bottom: 3px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.2) 0px 0px 5px inset, rgba(255, 255, 255, 0.298039) 0px 1px 0px; color: white; left: 3px; padding: 3px 6px; position: absolute; text-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.701961) 0px -1px 0px;"><div class="Module PinCount">
<span class="pinIcon" style="background: url(https://s-passets-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/webapp/style/sprites/webapp-common-above_the_fold-2x-6bfc28da.png) -158px -130px / 214px 199px no-repeat; display: inline-block; height: 9px; margin-right: 3px; width: 7px;"></span>336</div>
</span></div>
<ul class="boardThumbs" style="margin: 4px 0px; padding: 0px;">
<li style="display: inline; float: left; height: 47.33333px; list-style: none; margin-left: 0px; padding: 0px; position: relative; width: 47.33333px;"><span class="hoverMask" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; -webkit-transition: background 0.04s linear; border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; bottom: 0px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; left: 0px; position: absolute; right: 0px; top: 0px; transition: background 0.04s linear; z-index: 100;"></span><img class="thumb" data-load-state="pending" src="https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/75x75/46/af/ae/46afae4bdaaad27e0cda9ab823af2071.jpg" style="border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; border: 0px; height: 47.33333px; max-width: 100%; vertical-align: middle; width: 47.33333px;" /></li>
<li style="display: inline; float: left; height: 47.33333px; list-style: none; margin-left: 4px; padding: 0px; position: relative; width: 47.33333px;"><span class="hoverMask" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; -webkit-transition: background 0.04s linear; border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; bottom: 0px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; left: 0px; position: absolute; right: 0px; top: 0px; transition: background 0.04s linear; z-index: 100;"></span><img class="thumb" data-load-state="pending" src="https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/75x75/a8/16/87/a81687fa62bb58f886f2f536c8fb854d.jpg" style="border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; border: 0px; height: 47.33333px; max-width: 100%; vertical-align: middle; width: 47.33333px;" /></li>
<li style="display: inline; float: left; height: 47.33333px; list-style: none; margin-left: 4px; padding: 0px; position: relative; width: 47.33333px;"><span class="hoverMask" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; -webkit-transition: background 0.04s linear; border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; bottom: 0px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; left: 0px; position: absolute; right: 0px; top: 0px; transition: background 0.04s linear; z-index: 100;"></span><img class="thumb" data-load-state="pending" src="https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/75x75/6f/f1/e1/6ff1e18a8a9db9e0ab20ffddcab6160e.jpg" style="border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; border: 0px; height: 47.33333px; max-width: 100%; vertical-align: middle; width: 47.33333px;" /></li>
</ul>
</a><button class="Button Module ShowModalButton boardEditButton btn hasText rounded" style="background: linear-gradient(rgb(255, 255, 255), rgb(240, 240, 240)) rgb(240, 240, 240); border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; border: 1px solid rgb(204, 204, 204); color: #5f5f5f; cursor: pointer; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Helvetica, 'ヒラギノ角ゴ Pro W3', 'Hiragino Kaku Gothic Pro', メイリオ, Meiryo, 'MS Pゴシック', arial, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; font-weight: bold; margin: 0px 10px 10px; outline: none; padding: 7px 13px; position: relative; text-shadow: rgb(255, 255, 255) 0px 1px; vertical-align: middle; white-space: nowrap; width: 150px;" type="button"><span class="buttonText">Edit</span></button></div>
</div>
<div aria-disabled="true" class="item ui-draggable ui-draggable-disabled ui-state-disabled gridSortable" style="-webkit-transform: translateZ(0px); float: left; margin: 10px 5px 0px; width: 170px;">
<div class="Board Module boardCoverImage draggable noContext" data-component-type="1" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.219608) 0px 1px 2px 0px; background: rgb(255, 255, 255); border-bottom-left-radius: 6px; border-bottom-right-radius: 6px; border-top-left-radius: 6px; border-top-right-radius: 6px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.219608) 0px 1px 2px 0px; float: left; position: relative; width: 170px;">
<a class="boardLinkWrapper" data-element-type="36" href="https://www.pinterest.com/quietgeekgurl/skylights/" style="color: #555555; display: block; font-weight: bold; padding: 10px 10px 0px; position: relative; text-decoration: none;"><div class="boardName" style="-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased; font-size: 14px; height: auto; line-height: 18px; margin: 3px 1px 6px; overflow: hidden; position: relative; text-overflow: ellipsis; white-space: nowrap;">
<div class="BoardIcons Module pinCreate" style="display: inline-block; float: right; height: 16px;">
<span class="collaborativeIcon" style="background: url(https://s-passets-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/webapp/style/sprites/webapp-common-above_the_fold-2x-6bfc28da.png) -34px -167px / 214px 199px no-repeat; display: inline-block; height: 16px; margin-right: 0px; width: 16px;"></span></div>
<div class="name" style="overflow: hidden; text-overflow: ellipsis;">
SkyLights!</div>
</div>
<div class="boardCoverWrapper" style="background-color: #eeeeee; clear: both; height: 101.38889px; overflow: hidden; position: relative; width: 150px;">
<span class="hoverMask" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; -webkit-transition: background 0.04s linear; border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; bottom: 0px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; left: 0px; position: absolute; right: 0px; top: 0px; transition: background 0.04s linear; z-index: 100;"></span><img alt="SkyLights! / Fireworks, Rainbows, Strange lights in the Sky! The beauty of the sky as seen by the naked human eye! Be sure to check out Sensual Sets of the Suns and Magnificent Moons! Feel free to follow those as well :-) Enjoy! / by Quiet! ~The Pin Head!~" class="boardCover" data-load-state="pending" src="https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/custom_covers/216x146/550917035605973398_1401598553.jpg" style="border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; border: 0px; clear: both; height: 101.38889px; max-width: 100%; vertical-align: middle; width: 150px;" /><span class="boardPinCount" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.2) 0px 0px 5px inset, rgba(255, 255, 255, 0.298039) 0px 1px 0px; -webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased; background-color: rgba(68, 68, 68, 0.701961); border-bottom-left-radius: 2px; border-bottom-right-radius: 2px; border-top-left-radius: 2px; border-top-right-radius: 2px; bottom: 3px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.2) 0px 0px 5px inset, rgba(255, 255, 255, 0.298039) 0px 1px 0px; color: white; left: 3px; padding: 3px 6px; position: absolute; text-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.701961) 0px -1px 0px;"><div class="Module PinCount">
<span class="pinIcon" style="background: url(https://s-passets-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/webapp/style/sprites/webapp-common-above_the_fold-2x-6bfc28da.png) -158px -130px / 214px 199px no-repeat; display: inline-block; height: 9px; margin-right: 3px; width: 7px;"></span>12,819</div>
</span></div>
<ul class="boardThumbs" style="margin: 4px 0px; padding: 0px;">
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<a class="boardLinkWrapper" data-element-type="36" href="https://www.pinterest.com/lucretiamccloud/hush-be-quiet/" style="color: #555555; display: block; font-weight: bold; padding: 10px 10px 0px; position: relative; text-decoration: none;"><div class="boardName" style="-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased; font-size: 14px; height: auto; line-height: 18px; margin: 3px 1px 6px; overflow: hidden; position: relative; text-overflow: ellipsis; white-space: nowrap;">
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“Hush! Be quiet!”</div>
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<div class="boardCoverWrapper" style="background-color: #eeeeee; clear: both; height: 101.38889px; overflow: hidden; position: relative; width: 150px;">
<span class="hoverMask" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; -webkit-transition: background 0.04s linear; border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; bottom: 0px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; left: 0px; position: absolute; right: 0px; top: 0px; transition: background 0.04s linear; z-index: 100;"></span><img alt="“Hush! Be quiet!” / "He got up and rebuked the wind and said to the sea: “Hush! Be quiet!” And the wind abated, and a great calm set in...and they said to one another: “Who really is this? Even the wind and the sea obey him.” Mark 4:39, 41. "He raised him up from the dead and seated him at his right hand in the heavenly places, far above every government and authority and power and lordship, ...not only in this system of things but also in that to come. He also subjected all things under his feet." Eph. 1:19-22. / by Lucretia McCloud" class="boardCover" data-load-state="pending" src="https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/custom_covers/216x146/413205403250359788_1420400087.jpg" style="border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; border: 0px; clear: both; height: 101.38889px; max-width: 100%; vertical-align: middle; width: 150px;" /><span class="boardPinCount" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.2) 0px 0px 5px inset, rgba(255, 255, 255, 0.298039) 0px 1px 0px; -webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased; background-color: rgba(68, 68, 68, 0.701961); border-bottom-left-radius: 2px; border-bottom-right-radius: 2px; border-top-left-radius: 2px; border-top-right-radius: 2px; bottom: 3px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.2) 0px 0px 5px inset, rgba(255, 255, 255, 0.298039) 0px 1px 0px; color: white; left: 3px; padding: 3px 6px; position: absolute; text-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.701961) 0px -1px 0px;"><div class="Module PinCount">
<span class="pinIcon" style="background: url(https://s-passets-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/webapp/style/sprites/webapp-common-above_the_fold-2x-6bfc28da.png) -158px -130px / 214px 199px no-repeat; display: inline-block; height: 9px; margin-right: 3px; width: 7px;"></span>87</div>
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<li style="display: inline; float: left; height: 47.33333px; list-style: none; margin-left: 0px; padding: 0px; position: relative; width: 47.33333px;"><span class="hoverMask" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; -webkit-transition: background 0.04s linear; border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; bottom: 0px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; left: 0px; position: absolute; right: 0px; top: 0px; transition: background 0.04s linear; z-index: 100;"></span><img class="thumb" data-load-state="pending" src="https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/75x75/68/41/da/6841dade5fb2a3623a182dccb2b6c7fb.jpg" style="border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; border: 0px; height: 47.33333px; max-width: 100%; vertical-align: middle; width: 47.33333px;" /></li>
<li style="display: inline; float: left; height: 47.33333px; list-style: none; margin-left: 4px; padding: 0px; position: relative; width: 47.33333px;"><span class="hoverMask" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; -webkit-transition: background 0.04s linear; border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; bottom: 0px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; left: 0px; position: absolute; right: 0px; top: 0px; transition: background 0.04s linear; z-index: 100;"></span><img class="thumb" data-load-state="pending" src="https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/75x75/8f/59/5f/8f595fcce26ae7a95e9dde766a5f756d.jpg" style="border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; border: 0px; height: 47.33333px; max-width: 100%; vertical-align: middle; width: 47.33333px;" /></li>
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Situations/Occupations Soon To Be Extinct</div>
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<span class="hoverMask" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; -webkit-transition: background 0.04s linear; border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; bottom: 0px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; left: 0px; position: absolute; right: 0px; top: 0px; transition: background 0.04s linear; z-index: 100;"></span><img alt="Situations/Occupations Soon To Be Extinct / "How long, O Jehovah, must I cry for help, but you do not hear? How long must I ask for help from violence, but you do not intervene? Why do you make me witness wrongdoing? And why do you tolerate oppression? Why are destruction and violence before me? And why do quarreling and conflict abound?" Hab.1:2,3. "There are new heavens and a new earth that we are awaiting according to his promise, and in these righteousness is to dwell." 2 Peter 3:13..."Death, is to be brought to nothing." 1 Cor.15:26. / by Lucretia McCloud" class="boardCover" data-load-state="pending" src="https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/custom_covers/216x146/413205403250329205_1411503857.jpg" style="border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; border: 0px; clear: both; height: 101.38889px; max-width: 100%; vertical-align: middle; width: 150px;" /><span class="boardPinCount" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.2) 0px 0px 5px inset, rgba(255, 255, 255, 0.298039) 0px 1px 0px; -webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased; background-color: rgba(68, 68, 68, 0.701961); border-bottom-left-radius: 2px; border-bottom-right-radius: 2px; border-top-left-radius: 2px; border-top-right-radius: 2px; bottom: 3px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.2) 0px 0px 5px inset, rgba(255, 255, 255, 0.298039) 0px 1px 0px; color: white; left: 3px; padding: 3px 6px; position: absolute; text-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.701961) 0px -1px 0px;"><div class="Module PinCount">
<span class="pinIcon" style="background: url(https://s-passets-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/webapp/style/sprites/webapp-common-above_the_fold-2x-6bfc28da.png) -158px -130px / 214px 199px no-repeat; display: inline-block; height: 9px; margin-right: 3px; width: 7px;"></span>686</div>
</span></div>
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<li style="display: inline; float: left; height: 47.33333px; list-style: none; margin-left: 0px; padding: 0px; position: relative; width: 47.33333px;"><span class="hoverMask" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; -webkit-transition: background 0.04s linear; border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; bottom: 0px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; left: 0px; position: absolute; right: 0px; top: 0px; transition: background 0.04s linear; z-index: 100;"></span><img class="thumb" data-load-state="pending" src="https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/75x75/f4/6c/85/f46c854cda00127f60d3bbeee60ce4dc.jpg" style="border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; border: 0px; height: 47.33333px; max-width: 100%; vertical-align: middle; width: 47.33333px;" /></li>
<li style="display: inline; float: left; height: 47.33333px; list-style: none; margin-left: 4px; padding: 0px; position: relative; width: 47.33333px;"><span class="hoverMask" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; -webkit-transition: background 0.04s linear; border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; bottom: 0px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; left: 0px; position: absolute; right: 0px; top: 0px; transition: background 0.04s linear; z-index: 100;"></span><img class="thumb" data-load-state="pending" src="https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/75x75/6c/6b/ce/6c6bce00946013ce3348a7cada04fccd.jpg" style="border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; border: 0px; height: 47.33333px; max-width: 100%; vertical-align: middle; width: 47.33333px;" /></li>
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<div class="Board Module boardCoverImage draggable noContext" data-component-type="1" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.219608) 0px 1px 2px 0px; background: rgb(255, 255, 255); border-bottom-left-radius: 6px; border-bottom-right-radius: 6px; border-top-left-radius: 6px; border-top-right-radius: 6px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.219608) 0px 1px 2px 0px; float: left; position: relative; width: 170px;">
<a class="boardLinkWrapper" data-element-type="36" href="https://www.pinterest.com/lucretiamccloud/and-no-resident-will-say-i-am-sick-isaiah-3324/" style="color: #555555; display: block; font-weight: bold; padding: 10px 10px 0px; position: relative; text-decoration: none;"><div class="boardName" style="-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased; font-size: 14px; height: auto; line-height: 18px; margin: 3px 1px 6px; overflow: hidden; position: relative; text-overflow: ellipsis; white-space: nowrap;">
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"And no resident will say: “I am sick.” Isaiah 33:24.</div>
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<span class="hoverMask" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; -webkit-transition: background 0.04s linear; border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; bottom: 0px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; left: 0px; position: absolute; right: 0px; top: 0px; transition: background 0.04s linear; z-index: 100;"></span><img alt=""And no resident will say: “I am sick.” Isaiah 33:24. / "For we know that all creation keeps on groaning together and being in pain together until now." Romans 8:22, 23. People feel: "Distressed and extremely downcast; I walk around sad all day long." Psalm 38:6, 7. . . But there is a forthcoming fulfillment of this promise: "And he will wipe out every tear from their eyes, and death will be no more, neither will mourning nor outcry nor pain be anymore. The Former things have passed away.” Revelation 21:4. / by Lucretia McCloud" class="boardCover" data-load-state="pending" src="https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/custom_covers/216x146/413205403250359072_1411762155.jpg" style="border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; border: 0px; clear: both; height: 101.38889px; max-width: 100%; vertical-align: middle; width: 150px;" /><span class="boardPinCount" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.2) 0px 0px 5px inset, rgba(255, 255, 255, 0.298039) 0px 1px 0px; -webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased; background-color: rgba(68, 68, 68, 0.701961); border-bottom-left-radius: 2px; border-bottom-right-radius: 2px; border-top-left-radius: 2px; border-top-right-radius: 2px; bottom: 3px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.2) 0px 0px 5px inset, rgba(255, 255, 255, 0.298039) 0px 1px 0px; color: white; left: 3px; padding: 3px 6px; position: absolute; text-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.701961) 0px -1px 0px;"><div class="Module PinCount">
<span class="pinIcon" style="background: url(https://s-passets-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/webapp/style/sprites/webapp-common-above_the_fold-2x-6bfc28da.png) -158px -130px / 214px 199px no-repeat; display: inline-block; height: 9px; margin-right: 3px; width: 7px;"></span>191</div>
</span></div>
<ul class="boardThumbs" style="margin: 4px 0px; padding: 0px;">
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<li style="display: inline; float: left; height: 47.33333px; list-style: none; margin-left: 4px; padding: 0px; position: relative; width: 47.33333px;"><span class="hoverMask" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; -webkit-transition: background 0.04s linear; border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; bottom: 0px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; left: 0px; position: absolute; right: 0px; top: 0px; transition: background 0.04s linear; z-index: 100;"></span><img class="thumb" data-load-state="pending" src="https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/75x75/fa/88/a4/fa88a406fc2429741c66348bccae3b0a.jpg" style="border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; border: 0px; height: 47.33333px; max-width: 100%; vertical-align: middle; width: 47.33333px;" /></li>
<li style="display: inline; float: left; height: 47.33333px; list-style: none; margin-left: 4px; padding: 0px; position: relative; width: 47.33333px;"><span class="hoverMask" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; -webkit-transition: background 0.04s linear; border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; bottom: 0px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; left: 0px; position: absolute; right: 0px; top: 0px; transition: background 0.04s linear; z-index: 100;"></span><img class="thumb" data-load-state="pending" src="https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/75x75/24/b6/b7/24b6b7288a717fe30be1a7f4b3768c3e.jpg" style="border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; border: 0px; height: 47.33333px; max-width: 100%; vertical-align: middle; width: 47.33333px;" /></li>
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</a><button class="Button Module ShowModalButton boardEditButton btn hasText rounded" style="background: linear-gradient(rgb(255, 255, 255), rgb(240, 240, 240)) rgb(240, 240, 240); border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; border: 1px solid rgb(204, 204, 204); color: #5f5f5f; cursor: pointer; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Helvetica, 'ヒラギノ角ゴ Pro W3', 'Hiragino Kaku Gothic Pro', メイリオ, Meiryo, 'MS Pゴシック', arial, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; font-weight: bold; margin: 0px 10px 10px; outline: none; padding: 7px 13px; position: relative; text-shadow: rgb(255, 255, 255) 0px 1px; vertical-align: middle; white-space: nowrap; width: 150px;" type="button"><span class="buttonText">Edit</span></button></div>
</div>
<div aria-disabled="true" class="item ui-draggable ui-draggable-disabled ui-state-disabled gridSortable" style="-webkit-transform: translateZ(0px); float: left; margin: 10px 5px 0px; width: 170px;">
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<span class="collaborativeIcon" style="background: url(https://s-passets-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/webapp/style/sprites/webapp-common-above_the_fold-2x-6bfc28da.png) -34px -167px / 214px 199px no-repeat; display: inline-block; height: 16px; margin-right: 0px; width: 16px;"></span></div>
<div class="name" style="overflow: hidden; text-overflow: ellipsis;">
Photography</div>
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<div class="boardCoverWrapper" style="background-color: #eeeeee; clear: both; height: 101.38889px; overflow: hidden; position: relative; width: 150px;">
<span class="hoverMask" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; -webkit-transition: background 0.04s linear; border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; bottom: 0px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; left: 0px; position: absolute; right: 0px; top: 0px; transition: background 0.04s linear; z-index: 100;"></span><img alt="Photography / by Georgie Smith" class="boardCover" data-load-state="pending" src="https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/custom_covers/216x146/559853866116556922_1404858949.jpg" style="border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; border: 0px; clear: both; height: 101.38889px; max-width: 100%; vertical-align: middle; width: 150px;" /><span class="boardPinCount" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.2) 0px 0px 5px inset, rgba(255, 255, 255, 0.298039) 0px 1px 0px; -webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased; background-color: rgba(68, 68, 68, 0.701961); border-bottom-left-radius: 2px; border-bottom-right-radius: 2px; border-top-left-radius: 2px; border-top-right-radius: 2px; bottom: 3px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.2) 0px 0px 5px inset, rgba(255, 255, 255, 0.298039) 0px 1px 0px; color: white; left: 3px; padding: 3px 6px; position: absolute; text-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.701961) 0px -1px 0px;"><div class="Module PinCount">
<span class="pinIcon" style="background: url(https://s-passets-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/webapp/style/sprites/webapp-common-above_the_fold-2x-6bfc28da.png) -158px -130px / 214px 199px no-repeat; display: inline-block; height: 9px; margin-right: 3px; width: 7px;"></span>1,205</div>
</span></div>
<ul class="boardThumbs" style="margin: 4px 0px; padding: 0px;">
<li style="display: inline; float: left; height: 47.33333px; list-style: none; margin-left: 0px; padding: 0px; position: relative; width: 47.33333px;"><span class="hoverMask" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; -webkit-transition: background 0.04s linear; border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; bottom: 0px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; left: 0px; position: absolute; right: 0px; top: 0px; transition: background 0.04s linear; z-index: 100;"></span><img class="thumb" data-load-state="pending" src="https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/75x75/b0/9f/42/b09f420f668683229a5b674a4b900682.jpg" style="border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; border: 0px; height: 47.33333px; max-width: 100%; vertical-align: middle; width: 47.33333px;" /></li>
<li style="display: inline; float: left; height: 47.33333px; list-style: none; margin-left: 4px; padding: 0px; position: relative; width: 47.33333px;"><span class="hoverMask" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; -webkit-transition: background 0.04s linear; border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; bottom: 0px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; left: 0px; position: absolute; right: 0px; top: 0px; transition: background 0.04s linear; z-index: 100;"></span><img class="thumb" data-load-state="pending" src="https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/75x75/e5/55/23/e5552381cb70c1b4ec8acbbfa77ac56d.jpg" style="border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; border: 0px; height: 47.33333px; max-width: 100%; vertical-align: middle; width: 47.33333px;" /></li>
<li style="display: inline; float: left; height: 47.33333px; list-style: none; margin-left: 4px; padding: 0px; position: relative; width: 47.33333px;"><span class="hoverMask" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; -webkit-transition: background 0.04s linear; border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; bottom: 0px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; left: 0px; position: absolute; right: 0px; top: 0px; transition: background 0.04s linear; z-index: 100;"></span><img class="thumb" data-load-state="pending" src="https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/75x75/54/2f/6a/542f6a8459e51c81add892b950354997.jpg" style="border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; border: 0px; height: 47.33333px; max-width: 100%; vertical-align: middle; width: 47.33333px;" /></li>
</ul>
</a><button class="Button Module ShowModalButton boardEditButton btn hasText rounded" style="background: linear-gradient(rgb(255, 255, 255), rgb(240, 240, 240)) rgb(240, 240, 240); border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; border: 1px solid rgb(204, 204, 204); color: #5f5f5f; cursor: pointer; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Helvetica, 'ヒラギノ角ゴ Pro W3', 'Hiragino Kaku Gothic Pro', メイリオ, Meiryo, 'MS Pゴシック', arial, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; font-weight: bold; margin: 0px 10px 10px; outline: none; padding: 7px 13px; position: relative; text-shadow: rgb(255, 255, 255) 0px 1px; vertical-align: middle; white-space: nowrap; width: 150px;" type="button"><span class="buttonText">Edit</span></button></div>
</div>
<div aria-disabled="true" class="item ui-draggable ui-draggable-disabled ui-state-disabled gridSortable" style="-webkit-transform: translateZ(0px); float: left; margin: 10px 5px 0px; width: 170px;">
<div class="Board Module boardCoverImage draggable noContext" data-component-type="1" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.219608) 0px 1px 2px 0px; background: rgb(255, 255, 255); border-bottom-left-radius: 6px; border-bottom-right-radius: 6px; border-top-left-radius: 6px; border-top-right-radius: 6px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.219608) 0px 1px 2px 0px; float: left; position: relative; width: 170px;">
<a class="boardLinkWrapper" data-element-type="36" href="https://www.pinterest.com/roution/living-gluten-free/" style="color: #555555; display: block; font-weight: bold; padding: 10px 10px 0px; position: relative; text-decoration: none;"><div class="boardName" style="-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased; font-size: 14px; height: auto; line-height: 18px; margin: 3px 1px 6px; overflow: hidden; position: relative; text-overflow: ellipsis; white-space: nowrap;">
<div class="BoardIcons Module pinCreate" style="display: inline-block; float: right; height: 16px;">
<span class="collaborativeIcon" style="background: url(https://s-passets-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/webapp/style/sprites/webapp-common-above_the_fold-2x-6bfc28da.png) -34px -167px / 214px 199px no-repeat; display: inline-block; height: 16px; margin-right: 0px; width: 16px;"></span></div>
<div class="name" style="overflow: hidden; text-overflow: ellipsis;">
Living Gluten Free</div>
</div>
<div class="boardCoverWrapper" style="background-color: #eeeeee; clear: both; height: 101.38889px; overflow: hidden; position: relative; width: 150px;">
<span class="hoverMask" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; -webkit-transition: background 0.04s linear; border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; bottom: 0px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; left: 0px; position: absolute; right: 0px; top: 0px; transition: background 0.04s linear; z-index: 100;"></span><img alt="Living Gluten Free / Living Gluten Free / by Valerie Torrey- Roution" class="boardCover" data-load-state="pending" src="https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/216x146/b4/62/6c/b4626c29759826ee6a89ec355b3fd3d2.jpg" style="border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; border: 0px; clear: both; height: 101.38889px; max-width: 100%; vertical-align: middle; width: 150px;" /><span class="boardPinCount" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.2) 0px 0px 5px inset, rgba(255, 255, 255, 0.298039) 0px 1px 0px; -webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased; background-color: rgba(68, 68, 68, 0.701961); border-bottom-left-radius: 2px; border-bottom-right-radius: 2px; border-top-left-radius: 2px; border-top-right-radius: 2px; bottom: 3px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.2) 0px 0px 5px inset, rgba(255, 255, 255, 0.298039) 0px 1px 0px; color: white; left: 3px; padding: 3px 6px; position: absolute; text-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.701961) 0px -1px 0px;"><div class="Module PinCount">
<span class="pinIcon" style="background: url(https://s-passets-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/webapp/style/sprites/webapp-common-above_the_fold-2x-6bfc28da.png) -158px -130px / 214px 199px no-repeat; display: inline-block; height: 9px; margin-right: 3px; width: 7px;"></span>1,739</div>
</span></div>
<ul class="boardThumbs" style="margin: 4px 0px; padding: 0px;">
<li style="display: inline; float: left; height: 47.33333px; list-style: none; margin-left: 0px; padding: 0px; position: relative; width: 47.33333px;"><span class="hoverMask" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; -webkit-transition: background 0.04s linear; border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; bottom: 0px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; left: 0px; position: absolute; right: 0px; top: 0px; transition: background 0.04s linear; z-index: 100;"></span><img class="thumb" data-load-state="pending" src="https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/75x75/56/91/e8/5691e884af240d29434c8dda01e8a677.jpg" style="border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; border: 0px; height: 47.33333px; max-width: 100%; vertical-align: middle; width: 47.33333px;" /></li>
<li style="display: inline; float: left; height: 47.33333px; list-style: none; margin-left: 4px; padding: 0px; position: relative; width: 47.33333px;"><span class="hoverMask" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; -webkit-transition: background 0.04s linear; border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; bottom: 0px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; left: 0px; position: absolute; right: 0px; top: 0px; transition: background 0.04s linear; z-index: 100;"></span><img class="thumb" data-load-state="pending" src="https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/75x75/80/c8/51/80c8511c58507f0f61596f38f5c0ede6.jpg" style="border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; border: 0px; height: 47.33333px; max-width: 100%; vertical-align: middle; width: 47.33333px;" /></li>
<li style="display: inline; float: left; height: 47.33333px; list-style: none; margin-left: 4px; padding: 0px; position: relative; width: 47.33333px;"><span class="hoverMask" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; -webkit-transition: background 0.04s linear; border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; bottom: 0px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; left: 0px; position: absolute; right: 0px; top: 0px; transition: background 0.04s linear; z-index: 100;"></span><img class="thumb" data-load-state="pending" src="https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/75x75/ca/7c/07/ca7c0738d5d4c43414e4ce327e49f1e5.jpg" style="border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; border: 0px; height: 47.33333px; max-width: 100%; vertical-align: middle; width: 47.33333px;" /></li>
</ul>
</a><button class="Button Module ShowModalButton boardEditButton btn hasText rounded" style="background: linear-gradient(rgb(255, 255, 255), rgb(240, 240, 240)) rgb(240, 240, 240); border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; border: 1px solid rgb(204, 204, 204); color: #5f5f5f; cursor: pointer; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Helvetica, 'ヒラギノ角ゴ Pro W3', 'Hiragino Kaku Gothic Pro', メイリオ, Meiryo, 'MS Pゴシック', arial, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; font-weight: bold; margin: 0px 10px 10px; outline: none; padding: 7px 13px; position: relative; text-shadow: rgb(255, 255, 255) 0px 1px; vertical-align: middle; white-space: nowrap; width: 150px;" type="button"><span class="buttonText">Edit</span></button></div>
</div>
<div aria-disabled="true" class="item ui-draggable ui-draggable-disabled ui-state-disabled gridSortable" style="-webkit-transform: translateZ(0px); float: left; margin: 10px 5px 0px; width: 170px;">
<div class="Board Module boardCoverImage draggable noContext" data-component-type="1" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.219608) 0px 1px 2px 0px; background: rgb(255, 255, 255); border-bottom-left-radius: 6px; border-bottom-right-radius: 6px; border-top-left-radius: 6px; border-top-right-radius: 6px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.219608) 0px 1px 2px 0px; float: left; position: relative; width: 170px;">
<a class="boardLinkWrapper" data-element-type="36" href="https://www.pinterest.com/dltstoyland/amazing-locations/" style="color: #555555; display: block; font-weight: bold; padding: 10px 10px 0px; position: relative; text-decoration: none;"><div class="boardName" style="-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased; font-size: 14px; height: auto; line-height: 18px; margin: 3px 1px 6px; overflow: hidden; position: relative; text-overflow: ellipsis; white-space: nowrap;">
<div class="BoardIcons Module pinCreate" style="display: inline-block; float: right; height: 16px;">
<span class="collaborativeIcon" style="background: url(https://s-passets-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/webapp/style/sprites/webapp-common-above_the_fold-2x-6bfc28da.png) -34px -167px / 214px 199px no-repeat; display: inline-block; height: 16px; margin-right: 0px; width: 16px;"></span></div>
<div class="name" style="overflow: hidden; text-overflow: ellipsis;">
☼Amazing Locations☼</div>
</div>
<div class="boardCoverWrapper" style="background-color: #eeeeee; clear: both; height: 101.38889px; overflow: hidden; position: relative; width: 150px;">
<span class="hoverMask" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; -webkit-transition: background 0.04s linear; border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; bottom: 0px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; left: 0px; position: absolute; right: 0px; top: 0px; transition: background 0.04s linear; z-index: 100;"></span><img alt="☼Amazing Locations☼ / Post some of you amazing locations around the world. Please don't repin anyone's pin over them, no spamming and only pins pertaining to the subject or that pin will be removed from the board. Follow the board if you would like an invite and feel free to invite others. Thank you and Happy Pinning ☺ / by DLT's Toyland" class="boardCover" data-load-state="pending" src="https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/custom_covers/216x146/353814183164322818_1408299681.jpg" style="border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; border: 0px; clear: both; height: 101.38889px; max-width: 100%; vertical-align: middle; width: 150px;" /><span class="boardPinCount" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.2) 0px 0px 5px inset, rgba(255, 255, 255, 0.298039) 0px 1px 0px; -webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased; background-color: rgba(68, 68, 68, 0.701961); border-bottom-left-radius: 2px; border-bottom-right-radius: 2px; border-top-left-radius: 2px; border-top-right-radius: 2px; bottom: 3px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.2) 0px 0px 5px inset, rgba(255, 255, 255, 0.298039) 0px 1px 0px; color: white; left: 3px; padding: 3px 6px; position: absolute; text-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.701961) 0px -1px 0px;"><div class="Module PinCount">
<span class="pinIcon" style="background: url(https://s-passets-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/webapp/style/sprites/webapp-common-above_the_fold-2x-6bfc28da.png) -158px -130px / 214px 199px no-repeat; display: inline-block; height: 9px; margin-right: 3px; width: 7px;"></span>7,278</div>
</span></div>
<ul class="boardThumbs" style="margin: 4px 0px; padding: 0px;">
<li style="display: inline; float: left; height: 47.33333px; list-style: none; margin-left: 0px; padding: 0px; position: relative; width: 47.33333px;"><span class="hoverMask" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; -webkit-transition: background 0.04s linear; border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; bottom: 0px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; left: 0px; position: absolute; right: 0px; top: 0px; transition: background 0.04s linear; z-index: 100;"></span><img class="thumb" data-load-state="pending" src="https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/75x75/44/4e/22/444e221cb64bee33f3b770f8af523dd0.jpg" style="border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; border: 0px; height: 47.33333px; max-width: 100%; vertical-align: middle; width: 47.33333px;" /></li>
<li style="display: inline; float: left; height: 47.33333px; list-style: none; margin-left: 4px; padding: 0px; position: relative; width: 47.33333px;"><span class="hoverMask" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; -webkit-transition: background 0.04s linear; border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; bottom: 0px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; left: 0px; position: absolute; right: 0px; top: 0px; transition: background 0.04s linear; z-index: 100;"></span><img class="thumb" data-load-state="pending" src="https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/75x75/2b/cd/8c/2bcd8cfd40811e9eb3644e40636b5179.jpg" style="border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; border: 0px; height: 47.33333px; max-width: 100%; vertical-align: middle; width: 47.33333px;" /></li>
<li style="display: inline; float: left; height: 47.33333px; list-style: none; margin-left: 4px; padding: 0px; position: relative; width: 47.33333px;"><span class="hoverMask" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; -webkit-transition: background 0.04s linear; border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; bottom: 0px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; left: 0px; position: absolute; right: 0px; top: 0px; transition: background 0.04s linear; z-index: 100;"></span><img class="thumb" data-load-state="pending" src="https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/75x75/c9/c0/df/c9c0df1e8b180b3229644500b1ce1080.jpg" style="border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; border: 0px; height: 47.33333px; max-width: 100%; vertical-align: middle; width: 47.33333px;" /></li>
</ul>
</a><button class="Button Module ShowModalButton boardEditButton btn hasText rounded" style="background: linear-gradient(rgb(255, 255, 255), rgb(240, 240, 240)) rgb(240, 240, 240); border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; border: 1px solid rgb(204, 204, 204); color: #5f5f5f; cursor: pointer; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Helvetica, 'ヒラギノ角ゴ Pro W3', 'Hiragino Kaku Gothic Pro', メイリオ, Meiryo, 'MS Pゴシック', arial, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; font-weight: bold; margin: 0px 10px 10px; outline: none; padding: 7px 13px; position: relative; text-shadow: rgb(255, 255, 255) 0px 1px; vertical-align: middle; white-space: nowrap; width: 150px;" type="button"><span class="buttonText">Edit</span></button></div>
</div>
<div aria-disabled="true" class="item ui-draggable ui-draggable-disabled ui-state-disabled gridSortable" style="-webkit-transform: translateZ(0px); float: left; margin: 10px 5px 0px; width: 170px;">
<div class="Board Module boardCoverImage draggable noContext" data-component-type="1" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.219608) 0px 1px 2px 0px; background: rgb(255, 255, 255); border-bottom-left-radius: 6px; border-bottom-right-radius: 6px; border-top-left-radius: 6px; border-top-right-radius: 6px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.219608) 0px 1px 2px 0px; float: left; position: relative; width: 170px;">
<a class="boardLinkWrapper" data-element-type="36" href="https://www.pinterest.com/lucretiamccloud/no-more-vicious-animal-or-animal-like-attacks/" style="color: #555555; display: block; font-weight: bold; padding: 10px 10px 0px; position: relative; text-decoration: none;"><div class="boardName" style="-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased; font-size: 14px; height: auto; line-height: 18px; margin: 3px 1px 6px; overflow: hidden; position: relative; text-overflow: ellipsis; white-space: nowrap;">
<div class="BoardIcons Module pinCreate" style="display: inline-block; float: right; height: 16px;">
</div>
<div class="name" style="overflow: hidden; text-overflow: ellipsis;">
No More Vicious Animal or Animal-like Attacks</div>
</div>
<div class="boardCoverWrapper" style="background-color: #eeeeee; clear: both; height: 101.38889px; overflow: hidden; position: relative; width: 150px;">
<span class="hoverMask" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; -webkit-transition: background 0.04s linear; border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; bottom: 0px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; left: 0px; position: absolute; right: 0px; top: 0px; transition: background 0.04s linear; z-index: 100;"></span><img alt="No More Vicious Animal or Animal-like Attacks / "I will put peace in the land, and you will lie down with no one making you afraid; and I will rid the land of vicious wild animals, and a sword of war will not pass through your land." Leviticus 26:6. / by Lucretia McCloud" class="boardCover" data-load-state="pending" src="https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/custom_covers/216x146/413205403250356839_1405724215.jpg" style="border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; border: 0px; clear: both; height: 101.38889px; max-width: 100%; vertical-align: middle; width: 150px;" /><span class="boardPinCount" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.2) 0px 0px 5px inset, rgba(255, 255, 255, 0.298039) 0px 1px 0px; -webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased; background-color: rgba(68, 68, 68, 0.701961); border-bottom-left-radius: 2px; border-bottom-right-radius: 2px; border-top-left-radius: 2px; border-top-right-radius: 2px; bottom: 3px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.2) 0px 0px 5px inset, rgba(255, 255, 255, 0.298039) 0px 1px 0px; color: white; left: 3px; padding: 3px 6px; position: absolute; text-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.701961) 0px -1px 0px;"><div class="Module PinCount">
<span class="pinIcon" style="background: url(https://s-passets-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/webapp/style/sprites/webapp-common-above_the_fold-2x-6bfc28da.png) -158px -130px / 214px 199px no-repeat; display: inline-block; height: 9px; margin-right: 3px; width: 7px;"></span>96</div>
</span></div>
<ul class="boardThumbs" style="margin: 4px 0px; padding: 0px;">
<li style="display: inline; float: left; height: 47.33333px; list-style: none; margin-left: 0px; padding: 0px; position: relative; width: 47.33333px;"><span class="hoverMask" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; -webkit-transition: background 0.04s linear; border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; bottom: 0px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; left: 0px; position: absolute; right: 0px; top: 0px; transition: background 0.04s linear; z-index: 100;"></span><img class="thumb" data-load-state="pending" src="https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/75x75/42/26/ec/4226ece601ccaea68a268f3b97803356.jpg" style="border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; border: 0px; height: 47.33333px; max-width: 100%; vertical-align: middle; width: 47.33333px;" /></li>
<li style="display: inline; float: left; height: 47.33333px; list-style: none; margin-left: 4px; padding: 0px; position: relative; width: 47.33333px;"><span class="hoverMask" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; -webkit-transition: background 0.04s linear; border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; bottom: 0px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; left: 0px; position: absolute; right: 0px; top: 0px; transition: background 0.04s linear; z-index: 100;"></span><img class="thumb" data-load-state="pending" src="https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/75x75/d6/ad/7a/d6ad7a68e367cb131875a7bbc9fdf167.jpg" style="border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; border: 0px; height: 47.33333px; max-width: 100%; vertical-align: middle; width: 47.33333px;" /></li>
<li style="display: inline; float: left; height: 47.33333px; list-style: none; margin-left: 4px; padding: 0px; position: relative; width: 47.33333px;"><span class="hoverMask" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; -webkit-transition: background 0.04s linear; border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; bottom: 0px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; left: 0px; position: absolute; right: 0px; top: 0px; transition: background 0.04s linear; z-index: 100;"></span><img class="thumb" data-load-state="pending" src="https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/75x75/77/10/84/7710843d6f02d3f1c0cce9f33e4305c0.jpg" style="border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; border: 0px; height: 47.33333px; max-width: 100%; vertical-align: middle; width: 47.33333px;" /></li>
</ul>
</a><button class="Button Module ShowModalButton boardEditButton btn hasText rounded" style="background: linear-gradient(rgb(255, 255, 255), rgb(240, 240, 240)) rgb(240, 240, 240); border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; border: 1px solid rgb(204, 204, 204); color: #5f5f5f; cursor: pointer; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Helvetica, 'ヒラギノ角ゴ Pro W3', 'Hiragino Kaku Gothic Pro', メイリオ, Meiryo, 'MS Pゴシック', arial, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; font-weight: bold; margin: 0px 10px 10px; outline: none; padding: 7px 13px; position: relative; text-shadow: rgb(255, 255, 255) 0px 1px; vertical-align: middle; white-space: nowrap; width: 150px;" type="button"><span class="buttonText">Edit</span></button></div>
</div>
<div aria-disabled="true" class="item ui-draggable ui-draggable-disabled ui-state-disabled gridSortable" style="-webkit-transform: translateZ(0px); float: left; margin: 10px 5px 0px; width: 170px;">
<div class="Board Module boardCoverImage draggable noContext" data-component-type="1" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.219608) 0px 1px 2px 0px; background: rgb(255, 255, 255); border-bottom-left-radius: 6px; border-bottom-right-radius: 6px; border-top-left-radius: 6px; border-top-right-radius: 6px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.219608) 0px 1px 2px 0px; float: left; position: relative; width: 170px;">
<a class="boardLinkWrapper" data-element-type="36" href="https://www.pinterest.com/moriahschmit/delicious-desserts/" style="color: #555555; display: block; font-weight: bold; padding: 10px 10px 0px; position: relative; text-decoration: none;"><div class="boardName" style="-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased; font-size: 14px; height: auto; line-height: 18px; margin: 3px 1px 6px; overflow: hidden; position: relative; text-overflow: ellipsis; white-space: nowrap;">
<div class="BoardIcons Module pinCreate" style="display: inline-block; float: right; height: 16px;">
<span class="collaborativeIcon" style="background: url(https://s-passets-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/webapp/style/sprites/webapp-common-above_the_fold-2x-6bfc28da.png) -34px -167px / 214px 199px no-repeat; display: inline-block; height: 16px; margin-right: 0px; width: 16px;"></span></div>
<div class="name" style="overflow: hidden; text-overflow: ellipsis;">
Delicious Desserts!</div>
</div>
<div class="boardCoverWrapper" style="background-color: #eeeeee; clear: both; height: 101.38889px; overflow: hidden; position: relative; width: 150px;">
<span class="hoverMask" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; -webkit-transition: background 0.04s linear; border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; bottom: 0px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; left: 0px; position: absolute; right: 0px; top: 0px; transition: background 0.04s linear; z-index: 100;"></span><img alt="Delicious Desserts! / Pin as much as you'd like but please no spam :) / by Moriah Schmit" class="boardCover" data-load-state="pending" src="https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/custom_covers/216x146/411235078413318238_1391259565.jpg" style="border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; border: 0px; clear: both; height: 101.38889px; max-width: 100%; vertical-align: middle; width: 150px;" /><span class="boardPinCount" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.2) 0px 0px 5px inset, rgba(255, 255, 255, 0.298039) 0px 1px 0px; -webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased; background-color: rgba(68, 68, 68, 0.701961); border-bottom-left-radius: 2px; border-bottom-right-radius: 2px; border-top-left-radius: 2px; border-top-right-radius: 2px; bottom: 3px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.2) 0px 0px 5px inset, rgba(255, 255, 255, 0.298039) 0px 1px 0px; color: white; left: 3px; padding: 3px 6px; position: absolute; text-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.701961) 0px -1px 0px;"><div class="Module PinCount">
<span class="pinIcon" style="background: url(https://s-passets-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/webapp/style/sprites/webapp-common-above_the_fold-2x-6bfc28da.png) -158px -130px / 214px 199px no-repeat; display: inline-block; height: 9px; margin-right: 3px; width: 7px;"></span>21,338</div>
</span></div>
<ul class="boardThumbs" style="margin: 4px 0px; padding: 0px;">
<li style="display: inline; float: left; height: 47.33333px; list-style: none; margin-left: 0px; padding: 0px; position: relative; width: 47.33333px;"><span class="hoverMask" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; -webkit-transition: background 0.04s linear; border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; bottom: 0px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; left: 0px; position: absolute; right: 0px; top: 0px; transition: background 0.04s linear; z-index: 100;"></span><img class="thumb" data-load-state="pending" src="https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/75x75/09/f0/0a/09f00a95c2806e38ff4c02e29c990052.jpg" style="border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; border: 0px; height: 47.33333px; max-width: 100%; vertical-align: middle; width: 47.33333px;" /></li>
<li style="display: inline; float: left; height: 47.33333px; list-style: none; margin-left: 4px; padding: 0px; position: relative; width: 47.33333px;"><span class="hoverMask" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; -webkit-transition: background 0.04s linear; border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; bottom: 0px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; left: 0px; position: absolute; right: 0px; top: 0px; transition: background 0.04s linear; z-index: 100;"></span><img class="thumb" data-load-state="pending" src="https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/75x75/6a/6d/2a/6a6d2a06e879c9bfa0fde26016d6aff0.jpg" style="border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; border: 0px; height: 47.33333px; max-width: 100%; vertical-align: middle; width: 47.33333px;" /></li>
<li style="display: inline; float: left; height: 47.33333px; list-style: none; margin-left: 4px; padding: 0px; position: relative; width: 47.33333px;"><span class="hoverMask" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; -webkit-transition: background 0.04s linear; border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; bottom: 0px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; left: 0px; position: absolute; right: 0px; top: 0px; transition: background 0.04s linear; z-index: 100;"></span><img class="thumb" data-load-state="pending" src="https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/75x75/35/31/c0/3531c06d94c4214b8fcb6c99548cc942.jpg" style="border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; border: 0px; height: 47.33333px; max-width: 100%; vertical-align: middle; width: 47.33333px;" /></li>
</ul>
</a><button class="Button Module ShowModalButton boardEditButton btn hasText rounded" style="background: linear-gradient(rgb(255, 255, 255), rgb(240, 240, 240)) rgb(240, 240, 240); border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; border: 1px solid rgb(204, 204, 204); color: #5f5f5f; cursor: pointer; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Helvetica, 'ヒラギノ角ゴ Pro W3', 'Hiragino Kaku Gothic Pro', メイリオ, Meiryo, 'MS Pゴシック', arial, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; font-weight: bold; margin: 0px 10px 10px; outline: none; padding: 7px 13px; position: relative; text-shadow: rgb(255, 255, 255) 0px 1px; vertical-align: middle; white-space: nowrap; width: 150px;" type="button"><span class="buttonText">Edit</span></button></div>
</div>
<div aria-disabled="true" class="item ui-draggable ui-draggable-disabled ui-state-disabled gridSortable" style="-webkit-transform: translateZ(0px); float: left; margin: 10px 5px 0px; width: 170px;">
<div class="Board Module boardCoverImage draggable noContext" data-component-type="1" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.219608) 0px 1px 2px 0px; background: rgb(255, 255, 255); border-bottom-left-radius: 6px; border-bottom-right-radius: 6px; border-top-left-radius: 6px; border-top-right-radius: 6px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.219608) 0px 1px 2px 0px; float: left; position: relative; width: 170px;">
<a class="boardLinkWrapper" data-element-type="36" href="https://www.pinterest.com/trishahoque/a-beautiful-world/" style="color: #555555; display: block; font-weight: bold; padding: 10px 10px 0px; position: relative; text-decoration: none;"><div class="boardName" style="-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased; font-size: 14px; height: auto; line-height: 18px; margin: 3px 1px 6px; overflow: hidden; position: relative; text-overflow: ellipsis; white-space: nowrap;">
<div class="BoardIcons Module pinCreate" style="display: inline-block; float: right; height: 16px;">
<span class="collaborativeIcon" style="background: url(https://s-passets-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/webapp/style/sprites/webapp-common-above_the_fold-2x-6bfc28da.png) -34px -167px / 214px 199px no-repeat; display: inline-block; height: 16px; margin-right: 0px; width: 16px;"></span></div>
<div class="name" style="overflow: hidden; text-overflow: ellipsis;">
! A BEAUTIFUL WORLD !</div>
</div>
<div class="boardCoverWrapper" style="background-color: #eeeeee; clear: both; height: 101.38889px; overflow: hidden; position: relative; width: 150px;">
<span class="hoverMask" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; -webkit-transition: background 0.04s linear; border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; bottom: 0px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; left: 0px; position: absolute; right: 0px; top: 0px; transition: background 0.04s linear; z-index: 100;"></span><img alt="! A BEAUTIFUL WORLD ! / **Anyone who spams or pins unrelated content will be reported IMMEDIATELY. Please respect the integrity of the board**Celebrate the majestic beauty of planet Earth. You are welcome to invite your friends to this board. Let's build a home of the most awe-inspiring and high quality images of nature, plant and animal kingdom and cityscapes! A great big thank you to the wonderful contributors, without whom this board won't be half as beautiful! --Love,Trisha Hoque / by Trisha Hoque" class="boardCover" data-load-state="pending" src="https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/custom_covers/216x146/384776430602570663_1409100363.jpg" style="border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; border: 0px; clear: both; height: 101.38889px; max-width: 100%; vertical-align: middle; width: 150px;" /><span class="boardPinCount" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.2) 0px 0px 5px inset, rgba(255, 255, 255, 0.298039) 0px 1px 0px; -webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased; background-color: rgba(68, 68, 68, 0.701961); border-bottom-left-radius: 2px; border-bottom-right-radius: 2px; border-top-left-radius: 2px; border-top-right-radius: 2px; bottom: 3px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.2) 0px 0px 5px inset, rgba(255, 255, 255, 0.298039) 0px 1px 0px; color: white; left: 3px; padding: 3px 6px; position: absolute; text-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.701961) 0px -1px 0px;"><div class="Module PinCount">
<span class="pinIcon" style="background: url(https://s-passets-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/webapp/style/sprites/webapp-common-above_the_fold-2x-6bfc28da.png) -158px -130px / 214px 199px no-repeat; display: inline-block; height: 9px; margin-right: 3px; width: 7px;"></span>89,770</div>
</span></div>
<ul class="boardThumbs" style="margin: 4px 0px; padding: 0px;">
<li style="display: inline; float: left; height: 47.33333px; list-style: none; margin-left: 0px; padding: 0px; position: relative; width: 47.33333px;"><span class="hoverMask" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; -webkit-transition: background 0.04s linear; border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; bottom: 0px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; left: 0px; position: absolute; right: 0px; top: 0px; transition: background 0.04s linear; z-index: 100;"></span><img class="thumb" data-load-state="pending" src="https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/75x75/50/8f/29/508f29140ce88f581d75d7ce68fdf321.jpg" style="border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; border: 0px; height: 47.33333px; max-width: 100%; vertical-align: middle; width: 47.33333px;" /></li>
<li style="display: inline; float: left; height: 47.33333px; list-style: none; margin-left: 4px; padding: 0px; position: relative; width: 47.33333px;"><span class="hoverMask" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; -webkit-transition: background 0.04s linear; border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; bottom: 0px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; left: 0px; position: absolute; right: 0px; top: 0px; transition: background 0.04s linear; z-index: 100;"></span><img class="thumb" data-load-state="pending" src="https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/75x75/71/86/fb/7186fbc65e48fbad63225deefad45307.jpg" style="border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; border: 0px; height: 47.33333px; max-width: 100%; vertical-align: middle; width: 47.33333px;" /></li>
<li style="display: inline; float: left; height: 47.33333px; list-style: none; margin-left: 4px; padding: 0px; position: relative; width: 47.33333px;"><span class="hoverMask" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; -webkit-transition: background 0.04s linear; border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; bottom: 0px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; left: 0px; position: absolute; right: 0px; top: 0px; transition: background 0.04s linear; z-index: 100;"></span><img class="thumb" data-load-state="pending" src="https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/75x75/e3/6e/ab/e36eaba91fdb65557dd436b83124f3a0.jpg" style="border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; border: 0px; height: 47.33333px; max-width: 100%; vertical-align: middle; width: 47.33333px;" /></li>
</ul>
</a><button class="Button Module ShowModalButton boardEditButton btn hasText rounded" style="background: linear-gradient(rgb(255, 255, 255), rgb(240, 240, 240)) rgb(240, 240, 240); border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; border: 1px solid rgb(204, 204, 204); color: #5f5f5f; cursor: pointer; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Helvetica, 'ヒラギノ角ゴ Pro W3', 'Hiragino Kaku Gothic Pro', メイリオ, Meiryo, 'MS Pゴシック', arial, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; font-weight: bold; margin: 0px 10px 10px; outline: none; padding: 7px 13px; position: relative; text-shadow: rgb(255, 255, 255) 0px 1px; vertical-align: middle; white-space: nowrap; width: 150px;" type="button"><span class="buttonText">Edit</span></button></div>
</div>
<div aria-disabled="true" class="item ui-draggable ui-draggable-disabled ui-state-disabled gridSortable" style="-webkit-transform: translateZ(0px); float: left; margin: 10px 5px 0px; width: 170px;">
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<a class="boardLinkWrapper" data-element-type="36" href="https://www.pinterest.com/lucretiamccloud/small-and-great/" style="color: #555555; display: block; font-weight: bold; padding: 10px 10px 0px; position: relative; text-decoration: none;"><div class="boardName" style="-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased; font-size: 14px; height: auto; line-height: 18px; margin: 3px 1px 6px; overflow: hidden; position: relative; text-overflow: ellipsis; white-space: nowrap;">
<div class="BoardIcons Module pinCreate" style="display: inline-block; float: right; height: 16px;">
</div>
<div class="name" style="overflow: hidden; text-overflow: ellipsis;">
"Small and Great"</div>
</div>
<div class="boardCoverWrapper" style="background-color: #eeeeee; clear: both; height: 101.38889px; overflow: hidden; position: relative; width: 150px;">
<span class="hoverMask" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; -webkit-transition: background 0.04s linear; border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; bottom: 0px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; left: 0px; position: absolute; right: 0px; top: 0px; transition: background 0.04s linear; z-index: 100;"></span><img alt=""Small and Great" / "Look! These are just the fringes of his ways; only a faint whisper has been heard of him!" Job 26:14..."There is the sea, so great and wide, teeming with countless living things, both small and great." Ps. 104:25..."He does great and unsearchable things, wonderful things that cannot be counted." Job 9:10...Because of these: "All day long I will praise you; I will praise your name forever and ever." Psalm 145:2.
/ by Lucretia McCloud" class="boardCover" data-load-state="pending" src="https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/custom_covers/216x146/413205403250378522_1411762263.jpg" style="border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; border: 0px; clear: both; height: 101.38889px; max-width: 100%; vertical-align: middle; width: 150px;" /><span class="boardPinCount" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.2) 0px 0px 5px inset, rgba(255, 255, 255, 0.298039) 0px 1px 0px; -webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased; background-color: rgba(68, 68, 68, 0.701961); border-bottom-left-radius: 2px; border-bottom-right-radius: 2px; border-top-left-radius: 2px; border-top-right-radius: 2px; bottom: 3px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.2) 0px 0px 5px inset, rgba(255, 255, 255, 0.298039) 0px 1px 0px; color: white; left: 3px; padding: 3px 6px; position: absolute; text-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.701961) 0px -1px 0px;"><div class="Module PinCount">
<span class="pinIcon" style="background: url(https://s-passets-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/webapp/style/sprites/webapp-common-above_the_fold-2x-6bfc28da.png) -158px -130px / 214px 199px no-repeat; display: inline-block; height: 9px; margin-right: 3px; width: 7px;"></span>752</div>
</span></div>
<ul class="boardThumbs" style="margin: 4px 0px; padding: 0px;">
<li style="display: inline; float: left; height: 47.33333px; list-style: none; margin-left: 0px; padding: 0px; position: relative; width: 47.33333px;"><span class="hoverMask" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; -webkit-transition: background 0.04s linear; border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; bottom: 0px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; left: 0px; position: absolute; right: 0px; top: 0px; transition: background 0.04s linear; z-index: 100;"></span><img class="thumb" data-load-state="pending" src="https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/75x75/8d/0e/8e/8d0e8ed0f422b2af3f5383fdfa4b8f59.jpg" style="border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; border: 0px; height: 47.33333px; max-width: 100%; vertical-align: middle; width: 47.33333px;" /></li>
<li style="display: inline; float: left; height: 47.33333px; list-style: none; margin-left: 4px; padding: 0px; position: relative; width: 47.33333px;"><span class="hoverMask" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; -webkit-transition: background 0.04s linear; border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; bottom: 0px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; left: 0px; position: absolute; right: 0px; top: 0px; transition: background 0.04s linear; z-index: 100;"></span><img class="thumb" data-load-state="pending" src="https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/75x75/38/0b/04/380b047b34443a2f9ff584ecf8bf8cf9.jpg" style="border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; border: 0px; height: 47.33333px; max-width: 100%; vertical-align: middle; width: 47.33333px;" /></li>
<li style="display: inline; float: left; height: 47.33333px; list-style: none; margin-left: 4px; padding: 0px; position: relative; width: 47.33333px;"><span class="hoverMask" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; -webkit-transition: background 0.04s linear; border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; bottom: 0px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; left: 0px; position: absolute; right: 0px; top: 0px; transition: background 0.04s linear; z-index: 100;"></span><img class="thumb" data-load-state="pending" src="https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/75x75/b8/fe/55/b8fe553d7529876f1b45bd0e673fc868.jpg" style="border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; border: 0px; height: 47.33333px; max-width: 100%; vertical-align: middle; width: 47.33333px;" /></li>
</ul>
</a><button class="Button Module ShowModalButton boardEditButton btn hasText rounded" style="background: linear-gradient(rgb(255, 255, 255), rgb(240, 240, 240)) rgb(240, 240, 240); border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; border: 1px solid rgb(204, 204, 204); color: #5f5f5f; cursor: pointer; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Helvetica, 'ヒラギノ角ゴ Pro W3', 'Hiragino Kaku Gothic Pro', メイリオ, Meiryo, 'MS Pゴシック', arial, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; font-weight: bold; margin: 0px 10px 10px; outline: none; padding: 7px 13px; position: relative; text-shadow: rgb(255, 255, 255) 0px 1px; vertical-align: middle; white-space: nowrap; width: 150px;" type="button"><span class="buttonText">Edit</span></button></div>
</div>
<div aria-disabled="true" class="item ui-draggable ui-draggable-disabled ui-state-disabled gridSortable" style="-webkit-transform: translateZ(0px); float: left; margin: 10px 5px 0px; width: 170px;">
<div class="Board Module boardCoverImage draggable noContext" data-component-type="1" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.219608) 0px 1px 2px 0px; background: rgb(255, 255, 255); border-bottom-left-radius: 6px; border-bottom-right-radius: 6px; border-top-left-radius: 6px; border-top-right-radius: 6px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.219608) 0px 1px 2px 0px; float: left; position: relative; width: 170px;">
<a class="boardLinkWrapper" data-element-type="36" href="https://www.pinterest.com/lucretiamccloud/he-is-for-us-a-strong-tower-and-a-crag/" style="color: #555555; display: block; font-weight: bold; padding: 10px 10px 0px; position: relative; text-decoration: none;"><div class="boardName" style="-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased; font-size: 14px; height: auto; line-height: 18px; margin: 3px 1px 6px; overflow: hidden; position: relative; text-overflow: ellipsis; white-space: nowrap;">
<div class="BoardIcons Module pinCreate" style="display: inline-block; float: right; height: 16px;">
</div>
<div class="name" style="overflow: hidden; text-overflow: ellipsis;">
He is for us A Strong Tower and A Crag</div>
</div>
<div class="boardCoverWrapper" style="background-color: #eeeeee; clear: both; height: 101.38889px; overflow: hidden; position: relative; width: 150px;">
<span class="hoverMask" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; -webkit-transition: background 0.04s linear; border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; bottom: 0px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; left: 0px; position: absolute; right: 0px; top: 0px; transition: background 0.04s linear; z-index: 100;"></span><img alt="He is for us A Strong Tower and A Crag / "And I will give wonders in the heavens and on the earth, blood and fire and columns of smoke. The sun will be turned into darkness and the moon into blood before the coming of the great and awe-inspiring day of Jehovah. And everyone who calls on the name of Jehovah will be saved.” Joel 2:30-32..."The name of Jehovah is a strong tower. Into it the righteous one runs and receives protection." Pro 8:10. “Jehovah is my crag and my stronghold and the One who rescues me." 2 Sam 22:2. . .
/ by Lucretia McCloud" class="boardCover" data-load-state="pending" src="https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/custom_covers/216x146/413205403250379472_1411762282.jpg" style="border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; border: 0px; clear: both; height: 101.38889px; max-width: 100%; vertical-align: middle; width: 150px;" /><span class="boardPinCount" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.2) 0px 0px 5px inset, rgba(255, 255, 255, 0.298039) 0px 1px 0px; -webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased; background-color: rgba(68, 68, 68, 0.701961); border-bottom-left-radius: 2px; border-bottom-right-radius: 2px; border-top-left-radius: 2px; border-top-right-radius: 2px; bottom: 3px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.2) 0px 0px 5px inset, rgba(255, 255, 255, 0.298039) 0px 1px 0px; color: white; left: 3px; padding: 3px 6px; position: absolute; text-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.701961) 0px -1px 0px;"><div class="Module PinCount">
<span class="pinIcon" style="background: url(https://s-passets-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/webapp/style/sprites/webapp-common-above_the_fold-2x-6bfc28da.png) -158px -130px / 214px 199px no-repeat; display: inline-block; height: 9px; margin-right: 3px; width: 7px;"></span>101</div>
</span></div>
<ul class="boardThumbs" style="margin: 4px 0px; padding: 0px;">
<li style="display: inline; float: left; height: 47.33333px; list-style: none; margin-left: 0px; padding: 0px; position: relative; width: 47.33333px;"><span class="hoverMask" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; -webkit-transition: background 0.04s linear; border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; bottom: 0px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; left: 0px; position: absolute; right: 0px; top: 0px; transition: background 0.04s linear; z-index: 100;"></span><img class="thumb" data-load-state="pending" src="https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/75x75/37/27/de/3727de2b128a5c6539f2d9a7d7482eea.jpg" style="border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; border: 0px; height: 47.33333px; max-width: 100%; vertical-align: middle; width: 47.33333px;" /></li>
<li style="display: inline; float: left; height: 47.33333px; list-style: none; margin-left: 4px; padding: 0px; position: relative; width: 47.33333px;"><span class="hoverMask" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; -webkit-transition: background 0.04s linear; border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; bottom: 0px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; left: 0px; position: absolute; right: 0px; top: 0px; transition: background 0.04s linear; z-index: 100;"></span><img class="thumb" data-load-state="pending" src="https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/75x75/83/cb/5e/83cb5e559d6022ee4240c2f5b2549872.jpg" style="border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; border: 0px; height: 47.33333px; max-width: 100%; vertical-align: middle; width: 47.33333px;" /></li>
<li style="display: inline; float: left; height: 47.33333px; list-style: none; margin-left: 4px; padding: 0px; position: relative; width: 47.33333px;"><span class="hoverMask" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; -webkit-transition: background 0.04s linear; border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; bottom: 0px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; left: 0px; position: absolute; right: 0px; top: 0px; transition: background 0.04s linear; z-index: 100;"></span><img class="thumb" data-load-state="pending" src="https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/75x75/8e/3b/b2/8e3bb226bd5d1166a7bdcc1c4ee32194.jpg" style="border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; border: 0px; height: 47.33333px; max-width: 100%; vertical-align: middle; width: 47.33333px;" /></li>
</ul>
</a><button class="Button Module ShowModalButton boardEditButton btn hasText rounded" style="background: linear-gradient(rgb(255, 255, 255), rgb(240, 240, 240)) rgb(240, 240, 240); border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; border: 1px solid rgb(204, 204, 204); color: #5f5f5f; cursor: pointer; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Helvetica, 'ヒラギノ角ゴ Pro W3', 'Hiragino Kaku Gothic Pro', メイリオ, Meiryo, 'MS Pゴシック', arial, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; font-weight: bold; margin: 0px 10px 10px; outline: none; padding: 7px 13px; position: relative; text-shadow: rgb(255, 255, 255) 0px 1px; vertical-align: middle; white-space: nowrap; width: 150px;" type="button"><span class="buttonText">Edit</span></button></div>
</div>
<div aria-disabled="true" class="item ui-draggable ui-draggable-disabled ui-state-disabled gridSortable" style="-webkit-transform: translateZ(0px); float: left; margin: 10px 5px 0px; width: 170px;">
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<a class="boardLinkWrapper" data-element-type="36" href="https://www.pinterest.com/lucretiamccloud/recipes/" style="color: #555555; display: block; font-weight: bold; padding: 10px 10px 0px; position: relative; text-decoration: none;"><div class="boardName" style="-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased; font-size: 14px; height: auto; line-height: 18px; margin: 3px 1px 6px; overflow: hidden; position: relative; text-overflow: ellipsis; white-space: nowrap;">
<div class="BoardIcons Module pinCreate" style="display: inline-block; float: right; height: 16px;">
</div>
<div class="name" style="overflow: hidden; text-overflow: ellipsis;">
recipes</div>
</div>
<div class="boardCoverWrapper" style="background-color: #eeeeee; clear: both; height: 101.38889px; overflow: hidden; position: relative; width: 150px;">
<span class="hoverMask" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; -webkit-transition: background 0.04s linear; border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; bottom: 0px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; left: 0px; position: absolute; right: 0px; top: 0px; transition: background 0.04s linear; z-index: 100;"></span><img alt="recipes / every day recipes / by Lucretia McCloud" class="boardCover" data-load-state="pending" src="https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/216x146/e0/be/f3/e0bef31a83515254aff632e4ded3edd8.jpg" style="border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; border: 0px; clear: both; height: 101.38889px; max-width: 100%; vertical-align: middle; width: 150px;" /><span class="boardPinCount" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.2) 0px 0px 5px inset, rgba(255, 255, 255, 0.298039) 0px 1px 0px; -webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased; background-color: rgba(68, 68, 68, 0.701961); border-bottom-left-radius: 2px; border-bottom-right-radius: 2px; border-top-left-radius: 2px; border-top-right-radius: 2px; bottom: 3px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.2) 0px 0px 5px inset, rgba(255, 255, 255, 0.298039) 0px 1px 0px; color: white; left: 3px; padding: 3px 6px; position: absolute; text-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.701961) 0px -1px 0px;"><div class="Module PinCount">
<span class="pinIcon" style="background: url(https://s-passets-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/webapp/style/sprites/webapp-common-above_the_fold-2x-6bfc28da.png) -158px -130px / 214px 199px no-repeat; display: inline-block; height: 9px; margin-right: 3px; width: 7px;"></span>65</div>
</span></div>
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Household Helps</div>
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<div class="name" style="overflow: hidden; text-overflow: ellipsis;">
See the World</div>
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<span class="hoverMask" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; -webkit-transition: background 0.04s linear; border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; bottom: 0px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; left: 0px; position: absolute; right: 0px; top: 0px; transition: background 0.04s linear; z-index: 100;"></span><img alt="See the World / Please visit http://www.infobarrel.com/Users/ologsinquito to read more travel articles. This is a a group board, so no adult content or nudity please and no more than 10 pins a day. Happy pinning. / by P O" class="boardCover" data-load-state="pending" src="https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/216x146/51/05/ec/5105ecb6a6db305c52b56ee30a608fa9.jpg" style="border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; border: 0px; clear: both; height: 101.38889px; max-width: 100%; vertical-align: middle; width: 150px;" /><span class="boardPinCount" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.2) 0px 0px 5px inset, rgba(255, 255, 255, 0.298039) 0px 1px 0px; -webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased; background-color: rgba(68, 68, 68, 0.701961); border-bottom-left-radius: 2px; border-bottom-right-radius: 2px; border-top-left-radius: 2px; border-top-right-radius: 2px; bottom: 3px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.2) 0px 0px 5px inset, rgba(255, 255, 255, 0.298039) 0px 1px 0px; color: white; left: 3px; padding: 3px 6px; position: absolute; text-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.701961) 0px -1px 0px;"><div class="Module PinCount">
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</a><button class="Button Module ShowModalButton boardEditButton btn hasText rounded" style="background: linear-gradient(rgb(255, 255, 255), rgb(240, 240, 240)) rgb(240, 240, 240); border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; border: 1px solid rgb(204, 204, 204); color: #5f5f5f; cursor: pointer; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Helvetica, 'ヒラギノ角ゴ Pro W3', 'Hiragino Kaku Gothic Pro', メイリオ, Meiryo, 'MS Pゴシック', arial, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; font-weight: bold; margin: 0px 10px 10px; outline: none; padding: 7px 13px; position: relative; text-shadow: rgb(255, 255, 255) 0px 1px; vertical-align: middle; white-space: nowrap; width: 150px;" type="button"><span class="buttonText">Edit</span></button></div>
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<div aria-disabled="true" class="item ui-draggable ui-draggable-disabled ui-state-disabled gridSortable" style="-webkit-transform: translateZ(0px); float: left; margin: 10px 5px 0px; width: 170px;">
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<a class="boardLinkWrapper" data-element-type="36" href="https://www.pinterest.com/susandaku/~~-food-lovin-~~/" style="color: #555555; display: block; font-weight: bold; padding: 10px 10px 0px; position: relative; text-decoration: none;"><div class="boardName" style="-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased; font-size: 14px; height: auto; line-height: 18px; margin: 3px 1px 6px; overflow: hidden; position: relative; text-overflow: ellipsis; white-space: nowrap;">
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<span class="collaborativeIcon" style="background: url(https://s-passets-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/webapp/style/sprites/webapp-common-above_the_fold-2x-6bfc28da.png) -34px -167px / 214px 199px no-repeat; display: inline-block; height: 16px; margin-right: 0px; width: 16px;"></span></div>
<div class="name" style="overflow: hidden; text-overflow: ellipsis;">
~~♥ Food Lovin' ♥~~</div>
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<div class="boardCoverWrapper" style="background-color: #eeeeee; clear: both; height: 101.38889px; overflow: hidden; position: relative; width: 150px;">
<span class="hoverMask" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; -webkit-transition: background 0.04s linear; border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; bottom: 0px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; left: 0px; position: absolute; right: 0px; top: 0px; transition: background 0.04s linear; z-index: 100;"></span><img alt="~~♥ Food Lovin' ♥~~ / Welcome to Food Lovin'!! Share your favorite foods & desserts. Please NO double pinning & NO power pinning! ***10 PIN LIMIT***Double pins will be deleted as well as advertising and unrelated food pins!! Thanks for following & enjoy!!♥♥♥
NOTE: Please be sure correct recipe links to original site,ty!
/ by ♥ Susan Daku ♥ | Dusted in Flour" class="boardCover" data-load-state="pending" src="https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/custom_covers/216x146/310818880471888757_1408561482.jpg" style="border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; border: 0px; clear: both; height: 101.38889px; max-width: 100%; vertical-align: middle; width: 150px;" /><span class="boardPinCount" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.2) 0px 0px 5px inset, rgba(255, 255, 255, 0.298039) 0px 1px 0px; -webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased; background-color: rgba(68, 68, 68, 0.701961); border-bottom-left-radius: 2px; border-bottom-right-radius: 2px; border-top-left-radius: 2px; border-top-right-radius: 2px; bottom: 3px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.2) 0px 0px 5px inset, rgba(255, 255, 255, 0.298039) 0px 1px 0px; color: white; left: 3px; padding: 3px 6px; position: absolute; text-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.701961) 0px -1px 0px;"><div class="Module PinCount">
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</span></div>
<ul class="boardThumbs" style="margin: 4px 0px; padding: 0px;">
<li style="display: inline; float: left; height: 47.33333px; list-style: none; margin-left: 0px; padding: 0px; position: relative; width: 47.33333px;"><span class="hoverMask" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; -webkit-transition: background 0.04s linear; border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; bottom: 0px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; left: 0px; position: absolute; right: 0px; top: 0px; transition: background 0.04s linear; z-index: 100;"></span><img class="thumb" data-load-state="pending" src="https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/75x75/86/0d/18/860d18a438c0167f26f9b2b6f85a241a.jpg" style="border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; border: 0px; height: 47.33333px; max-width: 100%; vertical-align: middle; width: 47.33333px;" /></li>
<li style="display: inline; float: left; height: 47.33333px; list-style: none; margin-left: 4px; padding: 0px; position: relative; width: 47.33333px;"><span class="hoverMask" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; -webkit-transition: background 0.04s linear; border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; bottom: 0px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; left: 0px; position: absolute; right: 0px; top: 0px; transition: background 0.04s linear; z-index: 100;"></span><img class="thumb" data-load-state="pending" src="https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/75x75/92/69/36/926936b269beefc1b921485b8e795cf8.jpg" style="border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; border: 0px; height: 47.33333px; max-width: 100%; vertical-align: middle; width: 47.33333px;" /></li>
<li style="display: inline; float: left; height: 47.33333px; list-style: none; margin-left: 4px; padding: 0px; position: relative; width: 47.33333px;"><span class="hoverMask" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; -webkit-transition: background 0.04s linear; border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; bottom: 0px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; left: 0px; position: absolute; right: 0px; top: 0px; transition: background 0.04s linear; z-index: 100;"></span><img class="thumb" data-load-state="pending" src="https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/75x75/01/cf/a3/01cfa3ffd8ff54c5485eb83be2d51dc4.jpg" style="border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; border: 0px; height: 47.33333px; max-width: 100%; vertical-align: middle; width: 47.33333px;" /></li>
</ul>
</a><button class="Button Module ShowModalButton boardEditButton btn hasText rounded" style="background: linear-gradient(rgb(255, 255, 255), rgb(240, 240, 240)) rgb(240, 240, 240); border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; border: 1px solid rgb(204, 204, 204); color: #5f5f5f; cursor: pointer; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Helvetica, 'ヒラギノ角ゴ Pro W3', 'Hiragino Kaku Gothic Pro', メイリオ, Meiryo, 'MS Pゴシック', arial, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; font-weight: bold; margin: 0px 10px 10px; outline: none; padding: 7px 13px; position: relative; text-shadow: rgb(255, 255, 255) 0px 1px; vertical-align: middle; white-space: nowrap; width: 150px;" type="button"><span class="buttonText">Edit</span></button></div>
</div>
<div aria-disabled="true" class="item ui-draggable ui-draggable-disabled ui-state-disabled gridSortable" style="-webkit-transform: translateZ(0px); float: left; margin: 10px 5px 0px; width: 170px;">
<div class="Board Module boardCoverImage draggable noContext" data-component-type="1" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.219608) 0px 1px 2px 0px; background: rgb(255, 255, 255); border-bottom-left-radius: 6px; border-bottom-right-radius: 6px; border-top-left-radius: 6px; border-top-right-radius: 6px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.219608) 0px 1px 2px 0px; float: left; position: relative; width: 170px;">
<a class="boardLinkWrapper" data-element-type="36" href="https://www.pinterest.com/evian2se/black-is-beautiful/" style="color: #555555; display: block; font-weight: bold; padding: 10px 10px 0px; position: relative; text-decoration: none;"><div class="boardName" style="-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased; font-size: 14px; height: auto; line-height: 18px; margin: 3px 1px 6px; overflow: hidden; position: relative; text-overflow: ellipsis; white-space: nowrap;">
<div class="BoardIcons Module pinCreate" style="display: inline-block; float: right; height: 16px;">
<span class="collaborativeIcon" style="background: url(https://s-passets-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/webapp/style/sprites/webapp-common-above_the_fold-2x-6bfc28da.png) -34px -167px / 214px 199px no-repeat; display: inline-block; height: 16px; margin-right: 0px; width: 16px;"></span></div>
<div class="name" style="overflow: hidden; text-overflow: ellipsis;">
Black is beautiful</div>
</div>
<div class="boardCoverWrapper" style="background-color: #eeeeee; clear: both; height: 101.38889px; overflow: hidden; position: relative; width: 150px;">
<span class="hoverMask" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; -webkit-transition: background 0.04s linear; border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; bottom: 0px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; left: 0px; position: absolute; right: 0px; top: 0px; transition: background 0.04s linear; z-index: 100;"></span><img alt="Black is beautiful / Girls just wanna have fun
Please Pin with JOY and RESPECT Leave A Message+follow the Board, to enjoy and pin on. I Will add you asp. Thank you! / by Evi An" class="boardCover" data-load-state="pending" src="https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/custom_covers/216x146/404831522693098004_1427806512.jpg" style="border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; border: 0px; clear: both; height: 101.38889px; max-width: 100%; vertical-align: middle; width: 150px;" /><span class="boardPinCount" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.2) 0px 0px 5px inset, rgba(255, 255, 255, 0.298039) 0px 1px 0px; -webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased; background-color: rgba(68, 68, 68, 0.701961); border-bottom-left-radius: 2px; border-bottom-right-radius: 2px; border-top-left-radius: 2px; border-top-right-radius: 2px; bottom: 3px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.2) 0px 0px 5px inset, rgba(255, 255, 255, 0.298039) 0px 1px 0px; color: white; left: 3px; padding: 3px 6px; position: absolute; text-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.701961) 0px -1px 0px;"><div class="Module PinCount">
<span class="pinIcon" style="background: url(https://s-passets-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/webapp/style/sprites/webapp-common-above_the_fold-2x-6bfc28da.png) -158px -130px / 214px 199px no-repeat; display: inline-block; height: 9px; margin-right: 3px; width: 7px;"></span>15,160</div>
</span></div>
<ul class="boardThumbs" style="margin: 4px 0px; padding: 0px;">
<li style="display: inline; float: left; height: 47.33333px; list-style: none; margin-left: 0px; padding: 0px; position: relative; width: 47.33333px;"><span class="hoverMask" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; -webkit-transition: background 0.04s linear; border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; bottom: 0px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; left: 0px; position: absolute; right: 0px; top: 0px; transition: background 0.04s linear; z-index: 100;"></span><img class="thumb" data-load-state="pending" src="https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/75x75/50/9e/5f/509e5f7bccce51b42d6b43a82d4b639a.jpg" style="border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; border: 0px; height: 47.33333px; max-width: 100%; vertical-align: middle; width: 47.33333px;" /></li>
<li style="display: inline; float: left; height: 47.33333px; list-style: none; margin-left: 4px; padding: 0px; position: relative; width: 47.33333px;"><span class="hoverMask" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; -webkit-transition: background 0.04s linear; border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; bottom: 0px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; left: 0px; position: absolute; right: 0px; top: 0px; transition: background 0.04s linear; z-index: 100;"></span><img class="thumb" data-load-state="pending" src="https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/75x75/0c/a9/b4/0ca9b4c10d984e3d1c18082ae3fbff31.jpg" style="border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; border: 0px; height: 47.33333px; max-width: 100%; vertical-align: middle; width: 47.33333px;" /></li>
<li style="display: inline; float: left; height: 47.33333px; list-style: none; margin-left: 4px; padding: 0px; position: relative; width: 47.33333px;"><span class="hoverMask" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; -webkit-transition: background 0.04s linear; border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; bottom: 0px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; left: 0px; position: absolute; right: 0px; top: 0px; transition: background 0.04s linear; z-index: 100;"></span><img class="thumb" data-load-state="pending" src="https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/75x75/b3/e5/b4/b3e5b4e463425b74b2bc6c9ce8d54710.jpg" style="border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; border: 0px; height: 47.33333px; max-width: 100%; vertical-align: middle; width: 47.33333px;" /></li>
</ul>
</a><button class="Button Module ShowModalButton boardEditButton btn hasText rounded" style="background: linear-gradient(rgb(255, 255, 255), rgb(240, 240, 240)) rgb(240, 240, 240); border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; border: 1px solid rgb(204, 204, 204); color: #5f5f5f; cursor: pointer; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Helvetica, 'ヒラギノ角ゴ Pro W3', 'Hiragino Kaku Gothic Pro', メイリオ, Meiryo, 'MS Pゴシック', arial, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; font-weight: bold; margin: 0px 10px 10px; outline: none; padding: 7px 13px; position: relative; text-shadow: rgb(255, 255, 255) 0px 1px; vertical-align: middle; white-space: nowrap; width: 150px;" type="button"><span class="buttonText">Edit</span></button></div>
</div>
<div aria-disabled="true" class="item ui-draggable ui-draggable-disabled ui-state-disabled gridSortable" style="-webkit-transform: translateZ(0px); float: left; margin: 10px 5px 0px; width: 170px;">
<div class="Board Module boardCoverImage draggable noContext" data-component-type="1" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.219608) 0px 1px 2px 0px; background: rgb(255, 255, 255); border-bottom-left-radius: 6px; border-bottom-right-radius: 6px; border-top-left-radius: 6px; border-top-right-radius: 6px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.219608) 0px 1px 2px 0px; float: left; position: relative; width: 170px;">
<a class="boardLinkWrapper" data-element-type="36" href="https://www.pinterest.com/evian2se/cr%C3%A8me-della-cr%C3%A8me/" style="color: #555555; display: block; font-weight: bold; padding: 10px 10px 0px; position: relative; text-decoration: none;"><div class="boardName" style="-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased; font-size: 14px; height: auto; line-height: 18px; margin: 3px 1px 6px; overflow: hidden; position: relative; text-overflow: ellipsis; white-space: nowrap;">
<div class="BoardIcons Module pinCreate" style="display: inline-block; float: right; height: 16px;">
<span class="collaborativeIcon" style="background: url(https://s-passets-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/webapp/style/sprites/webapp-common-above_the_fold-2x-6bfc28da.png) -34px -167px / 214px 199px no-repeat; display: inline-block; height: 16px; margin-right: 0px; width: 16px;"></span></div>
<div class="name" style="overflow: hidden; text-overflow: ellipsis;">
Crème della crème</div>
</div>
<div class="boardCoverWrapper" style="background-color: #eeeeee; clear: both; height: 101.38889px; overflow: hidden; position: relative; width: 150px;">
<span class="hoverMask" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; -webkit-transition: background 0.04s linear; border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; bottom: 0px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; left: 0px; position: absolute; right: 0px; top: 0px; transition: background 0.04s linear; z-index: 100;"></span><img alt="Crème della crème / Sweet Dreams
Please Pin with JOY and RESPECT Leave A Message+follow the Board, to enjoy and pin on. I Will add you asp. Thank you! / by Evi An" class="boardCover" data-load-state="pending" src="https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/custom_covers/216x146/404831522693098014_1429397215.jpg" style="border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; border: 0px; clear: both; height: 101.38889px; max-width: 100%; vertical-align: middle; width: 150px;" /><span class="boardPinCount" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.2) 0px 0px 5px inset, rgba(255, 255, 255, 0.298039) 0px 1px 0px; -webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased; background-color: rgba(68, 68, 68, 0.701961); border-bottom-left-radius: 2px; border-bottom-right-radius: 2px; border-top-left-radius: 2px; border-top-right-radius: 2px; bottom: 3px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.2) 0px 0px 5px inset, rgba(255, 255, 255, 0.298039) 0px 1px 0px; color: white; left: 3px; padding: 3px 6px; position: absolute; text-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.701961) 0px -1px 0px;"><div class="Module PinCount">
<span class="pinIcon" style="background: url(https://s-passets-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/webapp/style/sprites/webapp-common-above_the_fold-2x-6bfc28da.png) -158px -130px / 214px 199px no-repeat; display: inline-block; height: 9px; margin-right: 3px; width: 7px;"></span>13,081</div>
</span></div>
<ul class="boardThumbs" style="margin: 4px 0px; padding: 0px;">
<li style="display: inline; float: left; height: 47.33333px; list-style: none; margin-left: 0px; padding: 0px; position: relative; width: 47.33333px;"><span class="hoverMask" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; -webkit-transition: background 0.04s linear; border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; bottom: 0px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; left: 0px; position: absolute; right: 0px; top: 0px; transition: background 0.04s linear; z-index: 100;"></span><img class="thumb" data-load-state="pending" src="https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/75x75/c1/00/f6/c100f6acd1a46c47b2f3fc827ccb775c.jpg" style="border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; border: 0px; height: 47.33333px; max-width: 100%; vertical-align: middle; width: 47.33333px;" /></li>
<li style="display: inline; float: left; height: 47.33333px; list-style: none; margin-left: 4px; padding: 0px; position: relative; width: 47.33333px;"><span class="hoverMask" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; -webkit-transition: background 0.04s linear; border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; bottom: 0px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; left: 0px; position: absolute; right: 0px; top: 0px; transition: background 0.04s linear; z-index: 100;"></span><img class="thumb" data-load-state="pending" src="https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/75x75/3e/5a/1f/3e5a1fbe1b238db74581c58c3c4e8206.jpg" style="border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; border: 0px; height: 47.33333px; max-width: 100%; vertical-align: middle; width: 47.33333px;" /></li>
<li style="display: inline; float: left; height: 47.33333px; list-style: none; margin-left: 4px; padding: 0px; position: relative; width: 47.33333px;"><span class="hoverMask" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; -webkit-transition: background 0.04s linear; border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; bottom: 0px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; left: 0px; position: absolute; right: 0px; top: 0px; transition: background 0.04s linear; z-index: 100;"></span><img class="thumb" data-load-state="pending" src="https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/75x75/cf/bb/57/cfbb576b4ef1400f072c137b6a4f09a8.jpg" style="border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; border: 0px; height: 47.33333px; max-width: 100%; vertical-align: middle; width: 47.33333px;" /></li>
</ul>
</a><button class="Button Module ShowModalButton boardEditButton btn hasText rounded" style="background: linear-gradient(rgb(255, 255, 255), rgb(240, 240, 240)) rgb(240, 240, 240); border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; border: 1px solid rgb(204, 204, 204); color: #5f5f5f; cursor: pointer; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Helvetica, 'ヒラギノ角ゴ Pro W3', 'Hiragino Kaku Gothic Pro', メイリオ, Meiryo, 'MS Pゴシック', arial, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; font-weight: bold; margin: 0px 10px 10px; outline: none; padding: 7px 13px; position: relative; text-shadow: rgb(255, 255, 255) 0px 1px; vertical-align: middle; white-space: nowrap; width: 150px;" type="button"><span class="buttonText">Edit</span></button></div>
</div>
<div aria-disabled="true" class="item ui-draggable ui-draggable-disabled ui-state-disabled gridSortable" style="-webkit-transform: translateZ(0px); float: left; margin: 10px 5px 0px; width: 170px;">
<div class="Board Module boardCoverImage draggable noContext" data-component-type="1" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.219608) 0px 1px 2px 0px; background: rgb(255, 255, 255); border-bottom-left-radius: 6px; border-bottom-right-radius: 6px; border-top-left-radius: 6px; border-top-right-radius: 6px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.219608) 0px 1px 2px 0px; float: left; position: relative; width: 170px;">
<a class="boardLinkWrapper" data-element-type="36" href="https://www.pinterest.com/evian2se/bohemian-style/" style="color: #555555; display: block; font-weight: bold; padding: 10px 10px 0px; position: relative; text-decoration: none;"><div class="boardName" style="-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased; font-size: 14px; height: auto; line-height: 18px; margin: 3px 1px 6px; overflow: hidden; position: relative; text-overflow: ellipsis; white-space: nowrap;">
<div class="BoardIcons Module pinCreate" style="display: inline-block; float: right; height: 16px;">
<span class="collaborativeIcon" style="background: url(https://s-passets-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/webapp/style/sprites/webapp-common-above_the_fold-2x-6bfc28da.png) -34px -167px / 214px 199px no-repeat; display: inline-block; height: 16px; margin-right: 0px; width: 16px;"></span></div>
<div class="name" style="overflow: hidden; text-overflow: ellipsis;">
Bohemian Style</div>
</div>
<div class="boardCoverWrapper" style="background-color: #eeeeee; clear: both; height: 101.38889px; overflow: hidden; position: relative; width: 150px;">
<span class="hoverMask" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; -webkit-transition: background 0.04s linear; border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; bottom: 0px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; left: 0px; position: absolute; right: 0px; top: 0px; transition: background 0.04s linear; z-index: 100;"></span><img alt="Bohemian Style / Boheimian wild Style , Welcome to Pin with
JOY and RESPECT Leave A Message+follow the Board, to enjoy and pin on. I Will add you asp. Thank you! / by Evi An" class="boardCover" data-load-state="pending" src="https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/custom_covers/216x146/404831522693098016_1429397169.jpg" style="border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; border: 0px; clear: both; height: 101.38889px; max-width: 100%; vertical-align: middle; width: 150px;" /><span class="boardPinCount" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.2) 0px 0px 5px inset, rgba(255, 255, 255, 0.298039) 0px 1px 0px; -webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased; background-color: rgba(68, 68, 68, 0.701961); border-bottom-left-radius: 2px; border-bottom-right-radius: 2px; border-top-left-radius: 2px; border-top-right-radius: 2px; bottom: 3px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.2) 0px 0px 5px inset, rgba(255, 255, 255, 0.298039) 0px 1px 0px; color: white; left: 3px; padding: 3px 6px; position: absolute; text-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.701961) 0px -1px 0px;"><div class="Module PinCount">
<span class="pinIcon" style="background: url(https://s-passets-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/webapp/style/sprites/webapp-common-above_the_fold-2x-6bfc28da.png) -158px -130px / 214px 199px no-repeat; display: inline-block; height: 9px; margin-right: 3px; width: 7px;"></span>9,045</div>
</span></div>
<ul class="boardThumbs" style="margin: 4px 0px; padding: 0px;">
<li style="display: inline; float: left; height: 47.33333px; list-style: none; margin-left: 0px; padding: 0px; position: relative; width: 47.33333px;"><span class="hoverMask" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; -webkit-transition: background 0.04s linear; border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; bottom: 0px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; left: 0px; position: absolute; right: 0px; top: 0px; transition: background 0.04s linear; z-index: 100;"></span><img class="thumb" data-load-state="pending" src="https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/75x75/d6/87/9d/d6879dc156c84b46548bbc13814d651f.jpg" style="border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; border: 0px; height: 47.33333px; max-width: 100%; vertical-align: middle; width: 47.33333px;" /></li>
<li style="display: inline; float: left; height: 47.33333px; list-style: none; margin-left: 4px; padding: 0px; position: relative; width: 47.33333px;"><span class="hoverMask" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; -webkit-transition: background 0.04s linear; border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; bottom: 0px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; left: 0px; position: absolute; right: 0px; top: 0px; transition: background 0.04s linear; z-index: 100;"></span><img class="thumb" data-load-state="pending" src="https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/75x75/a5/fd/bb/a5fdbb26df9c8efd58a0479e50e355bd.jpg" style="border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; border: 0px; height: 47.33333px; max-width: 100%; vertical-align: middle; width: 47.33333px;" /></li>
<li style="display: inline; float: left; height: 47.33333px; list-style: none; margin-left: 4px; padding: 0px; position: relative; width: 47.33333px;"><span class="hoverMask" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; -webkit-transition: background 0.04s linear; border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; bottom: 0px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; left: 0px; position: absolute; right: 0px; top: 0px; transition: background 0.04s linear; z-index: 100;"></span><img class="thumb" data-load-state="pending" src="https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/75x75/63/18/5f/63185f315ae66b95f1db980fc13e88ae.jpg" style="border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; border: 0px; height: 47.33333px; max-width: 100%; vertical-align: middle; width: 47.33333px;" /></li>
</ul>
</a><button class="Button Module ShowModalButton boardEditButton btn hasText rounded" style="background: linear-gradient(rgb(255, 255, 255), rgb(240, 240, 240)) rgb(240, 240, 240); border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; border: 1px solid rgb(204, 204, 204); color: #5f5f5f; cursor: pointer; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Helvetica, 'ヒラギノ角ゴ Pro W3', 'Hiragino Kaku Gothic Pro', メイリオ, Meiryo, 'MS Pゴシック', arial, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; font-weight: bold; margin: 0px 10px 10px; outline: none; padding: 7px 13px; position: relative; text-shadow: rgb(255, 255, 255) 0px 1px; vertical-align: middle; white-space: nowrap; width: 150px;" type="button"><span class="buttonText">Edit</span></button></div>
</div>
<div aria-disabled="true" class="item ui-draggable ui-draggable-disabled ui-state-disabled gridSortable" style="-webkit-transform: translateZ(0px); float: left; margin: 10px 5px 0px; width: 170px;">
<div class="Board Module boardCoverImage draggable noContext" data-component-type="1" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.219608) 0px 1px 2px 0px; background: rgb(255, 255, 255); border-bottom-left-radius: 6px; border-bottom-right-radius: 6px; border-top-left-radius: 6px; border-top-right-radius: 6px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.219608) 0px 1px 2px 0px; float: left; position: relative; width: 170px;">
<a class="boardLinkWrapper" data-element-type="36" href="https://www.pinterest.com/lucretiamccloud/writer/" style="color: #555555; display: block; font-weight: bold; padding: 10px 10px 0px; position: relative; text-decoration: none;"><div class="boardName" style="-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased; font-size: 14px; height: auto; line-height: 18px; margin: 3px 1px 6px; overflow: hidden; position: relative; text-overflow: ellipsis; white-space: nowrap;">
<div class="BoardIcons Module pinCreate" style="display: inline-block; float: right; height: 16px;">
</div>
<div class="name" style="overflow: hidden; text-overflow: ellipsis;">
writer</div>
</div>
<div class="boardCoverWrapper" style="background-color: #eeeeee; clear: both; height: 101.38889px; overflow: hidden; position: relative; width: 150px;">
<span class="hoverMask" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; -webkit-transition: background 0.04s linear; border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; bottom: 0px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; left: 0px; position: absolute; right: 0px; top: 0px; transition: background 0.04s linear; z-index: 100;"></span><img alt="writer / by Lucretia McCloud" class="boardCover" data-load-state="pending" src="https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/custom_covers/216x146/413205403250406657_1417728618.jpg" style="border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; border: 0px; clear: both; height: 101.38889px; max-width: 100%; vertical-align: middle; width: 150px;" /><span class="boardPinCount" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.2) 0px 0px 5px inset, rgba(255, 255, 255, 0.298039) 0px 1px 0px; -webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased; background-color: rgba(68, 68, 68, 0.701961); border-bottom-left-radius: 2px; border-bottom-right-radius: 2px; border-top-left-radius: 2px; border-top-right-radius: 2px; bottom: 3px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.2) 0px 0px 5px inset, rgba(255, 255, 255, 0.298039) 0px 1px 0px; color: white; left: 3px; padding: 3px 6px; position: absolute; text-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.701961) 0px -1px 0px;"><div class="Module PinCount">
<span class="pinIcon" style="background: url(https://s-passets-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/webapp/style/sprites/webapp-common-above_the_fold-2x-6bfc28da.png) -158px -130px / 214px 199px no-repeat; display: inline-block; height: 9px; margin-right: 3px; width: 7px;"></span>74</div>
</span></div>
<ul class="boardThumbs" style="margin: 4px 0px; padding: 0px;">
<li style="display: inline; float: left; height: 47.33333px; list-style: none; margin-left: 0px; padding: 0px; position: relative; width: 47.33333px;"><span class="hoverMask" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; -webkit-transition: background 0.04s linear; border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; bottom: 0px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; left: 0px; position: absolute; right: 0px; top: 0px; transition: background 0.04s linear; z-index: 100;"></span><img class="thumb" data-load-state="pending" src="https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/75x75/bd/f2/8e/bdf28eeb739860e65ef0a299c622f123.jpg" style="border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; border: 0px; height: 47.33333px; max-width: 100%; vertical-align: middle; width: 47.33333px;" /></li>
<li style="display: inline; float: left; height: 47.33333px; list-style: none; margin-left: 4px; padding: 0px; position: relative; width: 47.33333px;"><span class="hoverMask" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; -webkit-transition: background 0.04s linear; border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; bottom: 0px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; left: 0px; position: absolute; right: 0px; top: 0px; transition: background 0.04s linear; z-index: 100;"></span><img class="thumb" data-load-state="pending" src="https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/75x75/cc/fd/22/ccfd225adfdec062a741b8847c5666f9.jpg" style="border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; border: 0px; height: 47.33333px; max-width: 100%; vertical-align: middle; width: 47.33333px;" /></li>
<li style="display: inline; float: left; height: 47.33333px; list-style: none; margin-left: 4px; padding: 0px; position: relative; width: 47.33333px;"><span class="hoverMask" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; -webkit-transition: background 0.04s linear; border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; bottom: 0px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; left: 0px; position: absolute; right: 0px; top: 0px; transition: background 0.04s linear; z-index: 100;"></span><img class="thumb" data-load-state="pending" src="https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/75x75/c7/4d/13/c74d130aabbfb56a8165f050b7d6f1da.jpg" style="border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; border: 0px; height: 47.33333px; max-width: 100%; vertical-align: middle; width: 47.33333px;" /></li>
</ul>
</a><button class="Button Module ShowModalButton boardEditButton btn hasText rounded" style="background: linear-gradient(rgb(255, 255, 255), rgb(240, 240, 240)) rgb(240, 240, 240); border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; border: 1px solid rgb(204, 204, 204); color: #5f5f5f; cursor: pointer; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Helvetica, 'ヒラギノ角ゴ Pro W3', 'Hiragino Kaku Gothic Pro', メイリオ, Meiryo, 'MS Pゴシック', arial, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; font-weight: bold; margin: 0px 10px 10px; outline: none; padding: 7px 13px; position: relative; text-shadow: rgb(255, 255, 255) 0px 1px; vertical-align: middle; white-space: nowrap; width: 150px;" type="button"><span class="buttonText">Edit</span></button></div>
</div>
<div aria-disabled="true" class="item ui-draggable ui-draggable-disabled ui-state-disabled gridSortable" style="-webkit-transform: translateZ(0px); float: left; margin: 10px 5px 0px; width: 170px;">
<div class="Board Module boardCoverImage draggable noContext" data-component-type="1" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.219608) 0px 1px 2px 0px; background: rgb(255, 255, 255); border-bottom-left-radius: 6px; border-bottom-right-radius: 6px; border-top-left-radius: 6px; border-top-right-radius: 6px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.219608) 0px 1px 2px 0px; float: left; position: relative; width: 170px;">
<a class="boardLinkWrapper" data-element-type="36" href="https://www.pinterest.com/jaloc55/life-style/" style="color: #555555; display: block; font-weight: bold; padding: 10px 10px 0px; position: relative; text-decoration: none;"><div class="boardName" style="-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased; font-size: 14px; height: auto; line-height: 18px; margin: 3px 1px 6px; overflow: hidden; position: relative; text-overflow: ellipsis; white-space: nowrap;">
<div class="BoardIcons Module pinCreate" style="display: inline-block; float: right; height: 16px;">
<span class="collaborativeIcon" style="background: url(https://s-passets-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/webapp/style/sprites/webapp-common-above_the_fold-2x-6bfc28da.png) -34px -167px / 214px 199px no-repeat; display: inline-block; height: 16px; margin-right: 0px; width: 16px;"></span></div>
<div class="name" style="overflow: hidden; text-overflow: ellipsis;">
Life Style</div>
</div>
<div class="boardCoverWrapper" style="background-color: #eeeeee; clear: both; height: 101.38889px; overflow: hidden; position: relative; width: 150px;">
<span class="hoverMask" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; -webkit-transition: background 0.04s linear; border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; bottom: 0px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; left: 0px; position: absolute; right: 0px; top: 0px; transition: background 0.04s linear; z-index: 100;"></span><img alt="Life Style / The style of life we like the most. Ambiances, people, vehicles, country, places, hotels, colors, flowers, trees, houses... / by José Antonio" class="boardCover" data-load-state="pending" src="https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/216x146/ed/55/88/ed55881a702f2ecb6993a604003ccb1f.jpg" style="border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; border: 0px; clear: both; height: 101.38889px; max-width: 100%; vertical-align: middle; width: 150px;" /><span class="boardPinCount" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.2) 0px 0px 5px inset, rgba(255, 255, 255, 0.298039) 0px 1px 0px; -webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased; background-color: rgba(68, 68, 68, 0.701961); border-bottom-left-radius: 2px; border-bottom-right-radius: 2px; border-top-left-radius: 2px; border-top-right-radius: 2px; bottom: 3px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.2) 0px 0px 5px inset, rgba(255, 255, 255, 0.298039) 0px 1px 0px; color: white; left: 3px; padding: 3px 6px; position: absolute; text-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.701961) 0px -1px 0px;"><div class="Module PinCount">
<span class="pinIcon" style="background: url(https://s-passets-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/webapp/style/sprites/webapp-common-above_the_fold-2x-6bfc28da.png) -158px -130px / 214px 199px no-repeat; display: inline-block; height: 9px; margin-right: 3px; width: 7px;"></span>2,390</div>
</span></div>
<ul class="boardThumbs" style="margin: 4px 0px; padding: 0px;">
<li style="display: inline; float: left; height: 47.33333px; list-style: none; margin-left: 0px; padding: 0px; position: relative; width: 47.33333px;"><span class="hoverMask" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; -webkit-transition: background 0.04s linear; border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; bottom: 0px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; left: 0px; position: absolute; right: 0px; top: 0px; transition: background 0.04s linear; z-index: 100;"></span><img class="thumb" data-load-state="pending" src="https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/75x75/fa/79/8a/fa798a2555a8171842f091c9e52848c5.jpg" style="border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; border: 0px; height: 47.33333px; max-width: 100%; vertical-align: middle; width: 47.33333px;" /></li>
<li style="display: inline; float: left; height: 47.33333px; list-style: none; margin-left: 4px; padding: 0px; position: relative; width: 47.33333px;"><span class="hoverMask" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; -webkit-transition: background 0.04s linear; border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; bottom: 0px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; left: 0px; position: absolute; right: 0px; top: 0px; transition: background 0.04s linear; z-index: 100;"></span><img class="thumb" data-load-state="pending" src="https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/75x75/8b/00/5f/8b005f3dd7a0fc9b8ad480ec71456317.jpg" style="border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; border: 0px; height: 47.33333px; max-width: 100%; vertical-align: middle; width: 47.33333px;" /></li>
<li style="display: inline; float: left; height: 47.33333px; list-style: none; margin-left: 4px; padding: 0px; position: relative; width: 47.33333px;"><span class="hoverMask" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; -webkit-transition: background 0.04s linear; border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; bottom: 0px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; left: 0px; position: absolute; right: 0px; top: 0px; transition: background 0.04s linear; z-index: 100;"></span><img class="thumb" data-load-state="pending" src="https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/75x75/57/a0/ea/57a0ea3de09969d27ac9cde3bc6a4a1d.jpg" style="border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; border: 0px; height: 47.33333px; max-width: 100%; vertical-align: middle; width: 47.33333px;" /></li>
</ul>
</a><button class="Button Module ShowModalButton boardEditButton btn hasText rounded" style="background: linear-gradient(rgb(255, 255, 255), rgb(240, 240, 240)) rgb(240, 240, 240); border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; border: 1px solid rgb(204, 204, 204); color: #5f5f5f; cursor: pointer; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Helvetica, 'ヒラギノ角ゴ Pro W3', 'Hiragino Kaku Gothic Pro', メイリオ, Meiryo, 'MS Pゴシック', arial, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; font-weight: bold; margin: 0px 10px 10px; outline: none; padding: 7px 13px; position: relative; text-shadow: rgb(255, 255, 255) 0px 1px; vertical-align: middle; white-space: nowrap; width: 150px;" type="button"><span class="buttonText">Edit</span></button></div>
</div>
<div aria-disabled="true" class="item ui-draggable ui-draggable-disabled ui-state-disabled gridSortable" style="-webkit-transform: translateZ(0px); float: left; margin: 10px 5px 0px; width: 170px;">
<div class="Board Module boardCoverImage draggable noContext" data-component-type="1" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.219608) 0px 1px 2px 0px; background: rgb(255, 255, 255); border-bottom-left-radius: 6px; border-bottom-right-radius: 6px; border-top-left-radius: 6px; border-top-right-radius: 6px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.219608) 0px 1px 2px 0px; float: left; position: relative; width: 170px;">
<a class="boardLinkWrapper" data-element-type="36" href="https://www.pinterest.com/quietgeekgurl/dance-dance-dance/" style="color: #555555; display: block; font-weight: bold; padding: 10px 10px 0px; position: relative; text-decoration: none;"><div class="boardName" style="-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased; font-size: 14px; height: auto; line-height: 18px; margin: 3px 1px 6px; overflow: hidden; position: relative; text-overflow: ellipsis; white-space: nowrap;">
<div class="BoardIcons Module pinCreate" style="display: inline-block; float: right; height: 16px;">
<span class="collaborativeIcon" style="background: url(https://s-passets-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/webapp/style/sprites/webapp-common-above_the_fold-2x-6bfc28da.png) -34px -167px / 214px 199px no-repeat; display: inline-block; height: 16px; margin-right: 0px; width: 16px;"></span></div>
<div class="name" style="overflow: hidden; text-overflow: ellipsis;">
Dance! Dance! Dance!</div>
</div>
<div class="boardCoverWrapper" style="background-color: #eeeeee; clear: both; height: 101.38889px; overflow: hidden; position: relative; width: 150px;">
<span class="hoverMask" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; -webkit-transition: background 0.04s linear; border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; bottom: 0px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; left: 0px; position: absolute; right: 0px; top: 0px; transition: background 0.04s linear; z-index: 100;"></span><img alt="Dance! Dance! Dance! / by Quiet! ~The Pin Head!~" class="boardCover" data-load-state="pending" src="https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/216x146/1c/3a/d7/1c3ad7395909c385f4747c71b997fd31.jpg" style="border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; border: 0px; clear: both; height: 101.38889px; max-width: 100%; vertical-align: middle; width: 150px;" /><span class="boardPinCount" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.2) 0px 0px 5px inset, rgba(255, 255, 255, 0.298039) 0px 1px 0px; -webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased; background-color: rgba(68, 68, 68, 0.701961); border-bottom-left-radius: 2px; border-bottom-right-radius: 2px; border-top-left-radius: 2px; border-top-right-radius: 2px; bottom: 3px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.2) 0px 0px 5px inset, rgba(255, 255, 255, 0.298039) 0px 1px 0px; color: white; left: 3px; padding: 3px 6px; position: absolute; text-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.701961) 0px -1px 0px;"><div class="Module PinCount">
<span class="pinIcon" style="background: url(https://s-passets-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/webapp/style/sprites/webapp-common-above_the_fold-2x-6bfc28da.png) -158px -130px / 214px 199px no-repeat; display: inline-block; height: 9px; margin-right: 3px; width: 7px;"></span>8,067</div>
</span></div>
<ul class="boardThumbs" style="margin: 4px 0px; padding: 0px;">
<li style="display: inline; float: left; height: 47.33333px; list-style: none; margin-left: 0px; padding: 0px; position: relative; width: 47.33333px;"><span class="hoverMask" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; -webkit-transition: background 0.04s linear; border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; bottom: 0px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; left: 0px; position: absolute; right: 0px; top: 0px; transition: background 0.04s linear; z-index: 100;"></span><img class="thumb" data-load-state="pending" src="https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/75x75/b7/7d/d7/b77dd75fc5795713507a55b57feb38ee.jpg" style="border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; border: 0px; height: 47.33333px; max-width: 100%; vertical-align: middle; width: 47.33333px;" /></li>
<li style="display: inline; float: left; height: 47.33333px; list-style: none; margin-left: 4px; padding: 0px; position: relative; width: 47.33333px;"><span class="hoverMask" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; -webkit-transition: background 0.04s linear; border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; bottom: 0px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; left: 0px; position: absolute; right: 0px; top: 0px; transition: background 0.04s linear; z-index: 100;"></span><img class="thumb" data-load-state="pending" src="https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/75x75/77/fd/9a/77fd9a4af9931e61117f2c9cf08e0ec8.jpg" style="border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; border: 0px; height: 47.33333px; max-width: 100%; vertical-align: middle; width: 47.33333px;" /></li>
<li style="display: inline; float: left; height: 47.33333px; list-style: none; margin-left: 4px; padding: 0px; position: relative; width: 47.33333px;"><span class="hoverMask" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; -webkit-transition: background 0.04s linear; border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; bottom: 0px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; left: 0px; position: absolute; right: 0px; top: 0px; transition: background 0.04s linear; z-index: 100;"></span><img class="thumb" data-load-state="pending" src="https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/75x75/a8/12/b3/a812b3643ab57195a554f6bdfee688eb.jpg" style="border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; border: 0px; height: 47.33333px; max-width: 100%; vertical-align: middle; width: 47.33333px;" /></li>
</ul>
</a><button class="Button Module ShowModalButton boardEditButton btn hasText rounded" style="background: linear-gradient(rgb(255, 255, 255), rgb(240, 240, 240)) rgb(240, 240, 240); border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; border: 1px solid rgb(204, 204, 204); color: #5f5f5f; cursor: pointer; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Helvetica, 'ヒラギノ角ゴ Pro W3', 'Hiragino Kaku Gothic Pro', メイリオ, Meiryo, 'MS Pゴシック', arial, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; font-weight: bold; margin: 0px 10px 10px; outline: none; padding: 7px 13px; position: relative; text-shadow: rgb(255, 255, 255) 0px 1px; vertical-align: middle; white-space: nowrap; width: 150px;" type="button"><span class="buttonText">Edit</span></button></div>
</div>
<div aria-disabled="true" class="item ui-draggable ui-draggable-disabled ui-state-disabled gridSortable" style="-webkit-transform: translateZ(0px); float: left; margin: 10px 5px 0px; width: 170px;">
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<a class="boardLinkWrapper" data-element-type="36" href="https://www.pinterest.com/lucretiamccloud/adams-assignment/" style="color: #555555; display: block; font-weight: bold; padding: 10px 10px 0px; position: relative; text-decoration: none;"><div class="boardName" style="-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased; font-size: 14px; height: auto; line-height: 18px; margin: 3px 1px 6px; overflow: hidden; position: relative; text-overflow: ellipsis; white-space: nowrap;">
<div class="BoardIcons Module pinCreate" style="display: inline-block; float: right; height: 16px;">
</div>
<div class="name" style="overflow: hidden; text-overflow: ellipsis;">
Adam's Assignment</div>
</div>
<div class="boardCoverWrapper" style="background-color: #eeeeee; clear: both; height: 101.38889px; overflow: hidden; position: relative; width: 150px;">
<span class="hoverMask" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; -webkit-transition: background 0.04s linear; border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; bottom: 0px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; left: 0px; position: absolute; right: 0px; top: 0px; transition: background 0.04s linear; z-index: 100;"></span><img alt="Adam's Assignment / "And he (Jehovah God) began bringing them to the man to see what he would call each one; and whatever the man would call each living creature, that became it's name." Gen. 1:19 / by Lucretia McCloud" class="boardCover" data-load-state="pending" src="https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/custom_covers/216x146/413205403250461467_1427915356.jpg" style="border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; border: 0px; clear: both; height: 101.38889px; max-width: 100%; vertical-align: middle; width: 150px;" /><span class="boardPinCount" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.2) 0px 0px 5px inset, rgba(255, 255, 255, 0.298039) 0px 1px 0px; -webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased; background-color: rgba(68, 68, 68, 0.701961); border-bottom-left-radius: 2px; border-bottom-right-radius: 2px; border-top-left-radius: 2px; border-top-right-radius: 2px; bottom: 3px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.2) 0px 0px 5px inset, rgba(255, 255, 255, 0.298039) 0px 1px 0px; color: white; left: 3px; padding: 3px 6px; position: absolute; text-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.701961) 0px -1px 0px;"><div class="Module PinCount">
<span class="pinIcon" style="background: url(https://s-passets-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/webapp/style/sprites/webapp-common-above_the_fold-2x-6bfc28da.png) -158px -130px / 214px 199px no-repeat; display: inline-block; height: 9px; margin-right: 3px; width: 7px;"></span>177</div>
</span></div>
<ul class="boardThumbs" style="margin: 4px 0px; padding: 0px;">
<li style="display: inline; float: left; height: 47.33333px; list-style: none; margin-left: 0px; padding: 0px; position: relative; width: 47.33333px;"><span class="hoverMask" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; -webkit-transition: background 0.04s linear; border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; bottom: 0px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; left: 0px; position: absolute; right: 0px; top: 0px; transition: background 0.04s linear; z-index: 100;"></span><img class="thumb" data-load-state="pending" src="https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/75x75/1e/86/94/1e8694b751ff5a8c3b1fbbaf85e73960.jpg" style="border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; border: 0px; height: 47.33333px; max-width: 100%; vertical-align: middle; width: 47.33333px;" /></li>
<li style="display: inline; float: left; height: 47.33333px; list-style: none; margin-left: 4px; padding: 0px; position: relative; width: 47.33333px;"><span class="hoverMask" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; -webkit-transition: background 0.04s linear; border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; bottom: 0px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; left: 0px; position: absolute; right: 0px; top: 0px; transition: background 0.04s linear; z-index: 100;"></span><img class="thumb" data-load-state="pending" src="https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/75x75/5d/b5/e9/5db5e9801bf864e27ee91e55d557eb69.jpg" style="border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; border: 0px; height: 47.33333px; max-width: 100%; vertical-align: middle; width: 47.33333px;" /></li>
<li style="display: inline; float: left; height: 47.33333px; list-style: none; margin-left: 4px; padding: 0px; position: relative; width: 47.33333px;"><span class="hoverMask" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; -webkit-transition: background 0.04s linear; border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; bottom: 0px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; left: 0px; position: absolute; right: 0px; top: 0px; transition: background 0.04s linear; z-index: 100;"></span><img class="thumb" data-load-state="pending" src="https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/75x75/cc/76/33/cc76333a2e1ef202e152a1a3ab460311.jpg" style="border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; border: 0px; height: 47.33333px; max-width: 100%; vertical-align: middle; width: 47.33333px;" /></li>
</ul>
</a><button class="Button Module ShowModalButton boardEditButton btn hasText rounded" style="background: linear-gradient(rgb(255, 255, 255), rgb(240, 240, 240)) rgb(240, 240, 240); border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; border: 1px solid rgb(204, 204, 204); color: #5f5f5f; cursor: pointer; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Helvetica, 'ヒラギノ角ゴ Pro W3', 'Hiragino Kaku Gothic Pro', メイリオ, Meiryo, 'MS Pゴシック', arial, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; font-weight: bold; margin: 0px 10px 10px; outline: none; padding: 7px 13px; position: relative; text-shadow: rgb(255, 255, 255) 0px 1px; vertical-align: middle; white-space: nowrap; width: 150px;" type="button"><span class="buttonText">Edit</span></button></div>
</div>
<div aria-disabled="true" class="item ui-draggable ui-draggable-disabled ui-state-disabled gridSortable" style="-webkit-transform: translateZ(0px); float: left; margin: 10px 5px 0px; width: 170px;">
<div class="Board Module boardCoverImage draggable noContext" data-component-type="1" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.219608) 0px 1px 2px 0px; background: rgb(255, 255, 255); border-bottom-left-radius: 6px; border-bottom-right-radius: 6px; border-top-left-radius: 6px; border-top-right-radius: 6px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.219608) 0px 1px 2px 0px; float: left; position: relative; width: 170px;">
<a class="boardLinkWrapper" data-element-type="36" href="https://www.pinterest.com/meloesjuh/sunmoonsky/" style="color: #555555; display: block; font-weight: bold; padding: 10px 10px 0px; position: relative; text-decoration: none;"><div class="boardName" style="-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased; font-size: 14px; height: auto; line-height: 18px; margin: 3px 1px 6px; overflow: hidden; position: relative; text-overflow: ellipsis; white-space: nowrap;">
<div class="BoardIcons Module pinCreate" style="display: inline-block; float: right; height: 16px;">
<span class="collaborativeIcon" style="background: url(https://s-passets-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/webapp/style/sprites/webapp-common-above_the_fold-2x-6bfc28da.png) -34px -167px / 214px 199px no-repeat; display: inline-block; height: 16px; margin-right: 0px; width: 16px;"></span></div>
<div class="name" style="overflow: hidden; text-overflow: ellipsis;">
SUN•MOON•SKY!☼</div>
</div>
<div class="boardCoverWrapper" style="background-color: #eeeeee; clear: both; height: 101.38889px; overflow: hidden; position: relative; width: 150px;">
<span class="hoverMask" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; -webkit-transition: background 0.04s linear; border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; bottom: 0px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; left: 0px; position: absolute; right: 0px; top: 0px; transition: background 0.04s linear; z-index: 100;"></span><img alt="SUN•MOON•SKY!☼ / THE SUN•THE MOON•THE SKY! COMMENT TO JOIN ❤ INVITE YOUR FRIENDS ❤ / by Marlous📌" class="boardCover" data-load-state="pending" src="https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/custom_covers/216x146/540854305188733981_1436813990.jpg" style="border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; border: 0px; clear: both; height: 101.38889px; max-width: 100%; vertical-align: middle; width: 150px;" /><span class="boardPinCount" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.2) 0px 0px 5px inset, rgba(255, 255, 255, 0.298039) 0px 1px 0px; -webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased; background-color: rgba(68, 68, 68, 0.701961); border-bottom-left-radius: 2px; border-bottom-right-radius: 2px; border-top-left-radius: 2px; border-top-right-radius: 2px; bottom: 3px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.2) 0px 0px 5px inset, rgba(255, 255, 255, 0.298039) 0px 1px 0px; color: white; left: 3px; padding: 3px 6px; position: absolute; text-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.701961) 0px -1px 0px;"><div class="Module PinCount">
<span class="pinIcon" style="background: url(https://s-passets-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/webapp/style/sprites/webapp-common-above_the_fold-2x-6bfc28da.png) -158px -130px / 214px 199px no-repeat; display: inline-block; height: 9px; margin-right: 3px; width: 7px;"></span>1,844</div>
</span></div>
<ul class="boardThumbs" style="margin: 4px 0px; padding: 0px;">
<li style="display: inline; float: left; height: 47.33333px; list-style: none; margin-left: 0px; padding: 0px; position: relative; width: 47.33333px;"><span class="hoverMask" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; -webkit-transition: background 0.04s linear; border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; bottom: 0px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; left: 0px; position: absolute; right: 0px; top: 0px; transition: background 0.04s linear; z-index: 100;"></span><img class="thumb" data-load-state="pending" src="https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/75x75/b5/94/29/b5942924dca0e4e6ebc9e8b581567ad8.jpg" style="border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; border: 0px; height: 47.33333px; max-width: 100%; vertical-align: middle; width: 47.33333px;" /></li>
<li style="display: inline; float: left; height: 47.33333px; list-style: none; margin-left: 4px; padding: 0px; position: relative; width: 47.33333px;"><span class="hoverMask" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; -webkit-transition: background 0.04s linear; border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; bottom: 0px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; left: 0px; position: absolute; right: 0px; top: 0px; transition: background 0.04s linear; z-index: 100;"></span><img class="thumb" data-load-state="pending" src="https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/75x75/1c/ad/67/1cad67dfbe0b0517e33a8a2795d8d654.jpg" style="border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; border: 0px; height: 47.33333px; max-width: 100%; vertical-align: middle; width: 47.33333px;" /></li>
<li style="display: inline; float: left; height: 47.33333px; list-style: none; margin-left: 4px; padding: 0px; position: relative; width: 47.33333px;"><span class="hoverMask" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; -webkit-transition: background 0.04s linear; border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; bottom: 0px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; left: 0px; position: absolute; right: 0px; top: 0px; transition: background 0.04s linear; z-index: 100;"></span><img class="thumb" data-load-state="pending" src="https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/75x75/c8/a8/a0/c8a8a093e0f82432d008ea6101e3ce68.jpg" style="border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; border: 0px; height: 47.33333px; max-width: 100%; vertical-align: middle; width: 47.33333px;" /></li>
</ul>
</a><button class="Button Module ShowModalButton boardEditButton btn hasText rounded" style="background: linear-gradient(rgb(255, 255, 255), rgb(240, 240, 240)) rgb(240, 240, 240); border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; border: 1px solid rgb(204, 204, 204); color: #5f5f5f; cursor: pointer; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Helvetica, 'ヒラギノ角ゴ Pro W3', 'Hiragino Kaku Gothic Pro', メイリオ, Meiryo, 'MS Pゴシック', arial, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; font-weight: bold; margin: 0px 10px 10px; outline: none; padding: 7px 13px; position: relative; text-shadow: rgb(255, 255, 255) 0px 1px; vertical-align: middle; white-space: nowrap; width: 150px;" type="button"><span class="buttonText">Edit</span></button></div>
</div>
<div aria-disabled="true" class="item ui-draggable ui-draggable-disabled ui-state-disabled gridSortable" style="-webkit-transform: translateZ(0px); float: left; margin: 10px 5px 0px; width: 170px;">
<div class="Board Module boardCoverImage draggable noContext" data-component-type="1" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.219608) 0px 1px 2px 0px; background: rgb(255, 255, 255); border-bottom-left-radius: 6px; border-bottom-right-radius: 6px; border-top-left-radius: 6px; border-top-right-radius: 6px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.219608) 0px 1px 2px 0px; float: left; position: relative; width: 170px;">
<a class="boardLinkWrapper" data-element-type="36" href="https://www.pinterest.com/meloesjuh/dance/" style="color: #555555; display: block; font-weight: bold; padding: 10px 10px 0px; position: relative; text-decoration: none;"><div class="boardName" style="-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased; font-size: 14px; height: auto; line-height: 18px; margin: 3px 1px 6px; overflow: hidden; position: relative; text-overflow: ellipsis; white-space: nowrap;">
<div class="BoardIcons Module pinCreate" style="display: inline-block; float: right; height: 16px;">
<span class="collaborativeIcon" style="background: url(https://s-passets-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/webapp/style/sprites/webapp-common-above_the_fold-2x-6bfc28da.png) -34px -167px / 214px 199px no-repeat; display: inline-block; height: 16px; margin-right: 0px; width: 16px;"></span></div>
<div class="name" style="overflow: hidden; text-overflow: ellipsis;">
DANCE!</div>
</div>
<div class="boardCoverWrapper" style="background-color: #eeeeee; clear: both; height: 101.38889px; overflow: hidden; position: relative; width: 150px;">
<span class="hoverMask" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; -webkit-transition: background 0.04s linear; border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; bottom: 0px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; left: 0px; position: absolute; right: 0px; top: 0px; transition: background 0.04s linear; z-index: 100;"></span><img alt="DANCE! / ALL THINGS DANCE! COMMENT TO JOIN ❤ INVITE YOUR FRIENDS ❤ / by Marlous📌" class="boardCover" data-load-state="pending" src="https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/custom_covers/216x146/540854305188733871_1436819096.jpg" style="border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; border: 0px; clear: both; height: 101.38889px; max-width: 100%; vertical-align: middle; width: 150px;" /><span class="boardPinCount" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.2) 0px 0px 5px inset, rgba(255, 255, 255, 0.298039) 0px 1px 0px; -webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased; background-color: rgba(68, 68, 68, 0.701961); border-bottom-left-radius: 2px; border-bottom-right-radius: 2px; border-top-left-radius: 2px; border-top-right-radius: 2px; bottom: 3px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.2) 0px 0px 5px inset, rgba(255, 255, 255, 0.298039) 0px 1px 0px; color: white; left: 3px; padding: 3px 6px; position: absolute; text-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.701961) 0px -1px 0px;"><div class="Module PinCount">
<span class="pinIcon" style="background: url(https://s-passets-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/webapp/style/sprites/webapp-common-above_the_fold-2x-6bfc28da.png) -158px -130px / 214px 199px no-repeat; display: inline-block; height: 9px; margin-right: 3px; width: 7px;"></span>597</div>
</span></div>
<ul class="boardThumbs" style="margin: 4px 0px; padding: 0px;">
<li style="display: inline; float: left; height: 47.33333px; list-style: none; margin-left: 0px; padding: 0px; position: relative; width: 47.33333px;"><span class="hoverMask" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; -webkit-transition: background 0.04s linear; border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; bottom: 0px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; left: 0px; position: absolute; right: 0px; top: 0px; transition: background 0.04s linear; z-index: 100;"></span><img class="thumb" data-load-state="pending" src="https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/75x75/ae/4d/da/ae4ddaef961a6be32e30f61aec54cd12.jpg" style="border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; border: 0px; height: 47.33333px; max-width: 100%; vertical-align: middle; width: 47.33333px;" /></li>
<li style="display: inline; float: left; height: 47.33333px; list-style: none; margin-left: 4px; padding: 0px; position: relative; width: 47.33333px;"><span class="hoverMask" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; -webkit-transition: background 0.04s linear; border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; bottom: 0px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; left: 0px; position: absolute; right: 0px; top: 0px; transition: background 0.04s linear; z-index: 100;"></span><img class="thumb" data-load-state="pending" src="https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/75x75/9b/72/4b/9b724be27f4795df4555fad46283e3f8.jpg" style="border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; border: 0px; height: 47.33333px; max-width: 100%; vertical-align: middle; width: 47.33333px;" /></li>
<li style="display: inline; float: left; height: 47.33333px; list-style: none; margin-left: 4px; padding: 0px; position: relative; width: 47.33333px;"><span class="hoverMask" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; -webkit-transition: background 0.04s linear; border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; bottom: 0px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; left: 0px; position: absolute; right: 0px; top: 0px; transition: background 0.04s linear; z-index: 100;"></span><img class="thumb" data-load-state="pending" src="https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/75x75/84/c9/02/84c9020bc39c89c9585f70d4b9c82350.jpg" style="border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; border: 0px; height: 47.33333px; max-width: 100%; vertical-align: middle; width: 47.33333px;" /></li>
</ul>
</a><button class="Button Module ShowModalButton boardEditButton btn hasText rounded" style="background: linear-gradient(rgb(255, 255, 255), rgb(240, 240, 240)) rgb(240, 240, 240); border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; border: 1px solid rgb(204, 204, 204); color: #5f5f5f; cursor: pointer; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Helvetica, 'ヒラギノ角ゴ Pro W3', 'Hiragino Kaku Gothic Pro', メイリオ, Meiryo, 'MS Pゴシック', arial, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; font-weight: bold; margin: 0px 10px 10px; outline: none; padding: 7px 13px; position: relative; text-shadow: rgb(255, 255, 255) 0px 1px; vertical-align: middle; white-space: nowrap; width: 150px;" type="button"><span class="buttonText">Edit</span></button></div>
</div>
<div aria-disabled="true" class="item ui-draggable ui-draggable-disabled ui-state-disabled gridSortable" style="-webkit-transform: translateZ(0px); float: left; margin: 10px 5px 0px; width: 170px;">
<div class="Board Module boardCoverImage draggable noContext" data-component-type="1" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.219608) 0px 1px 2px 0px; background: rgb(255, 255, 255); border-bottom-left-radius: 6px; border-bottom-right-radius: 6px; border-top-left-radius: 6px; border-top-right-radius: 6px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.219608) 0px 1px 2px 0px; float: left; position: relative; width: 170px;">
<a class="boardLinkWrapper" data-element-type="36" href="https://www.pinterest.com/lucretiamccloud/family/" style="color: #555555; display: block; font-weight: bold; padding: 10px 10px 0px; position: relative; text-decoration: none;"><div class="boardName" style="-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased; font-size: 14px; height: auto; line-height: 18px; margin: 3px 1px 6px; overflow: hidden; position: relative; text-overflow: ellipsis; white-space: nowrap;">
<div class="BoardIcons Module pinCreate" style="display: inline-block; float: right; height: 16px;">
</div>
<div class="name" style="overflow: hidden; text-overflow: ellipsis;">
Family</div>
</div>
<div class="boardCoverWrapper" style="background-color: #eeeeee; clear: both; height: 101.38889px; overflow: hidden; position: relative; width: 150px;">
<span class="hoverMask" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; -webkit-transition: background 0.04s linear; border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; bottom: 0px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; left: 0px; position: absolute; right: 0px; top: 0px; transition: background 0.04s linear; z-index: 100;"></span><img alt="Family / by Lucretia McCloud" class="boardCover" data-load-state="pending" src="https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/216x146/1c/52/7c/1c527cea224505a5c76817dd8da0be8a.jpg" style="border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; border: 0px; clear: both; height: 101.38889px; max-width: 100%; vertical-align: middle; width: 150px;" /><span class="boardPinCount" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.2) 0px 0px 5px inset, rgba(255, 255, 255, 0.298039) 0px 1px 0px; -webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased; background-color: rgba(68, 68, 68, 0.701961); border-bottom-left-radius: 2px; border-bottom-right-radius: 2px; border-top-left-radius: 2px; border-top-right-radius: 2px; bottom: 3px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.2) 0px 0px 5px inset, rgba(255, 255, 255, 0.298039) 0px 1px 0px; color: white; left: 3px; padding: 3px 6px; position: absolute; text-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.701961) 0px -1px 0px;"><div class="Module PinCount">
<span class="pinIcon" style="background: url(https://s-passets-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/webapp/style/sprites/webapp-common-above_the_fold-2x-6bfc28da.png) -158px -130px / 214px 199px no-repeat; display: inline-block; height: 9px; margin-right: 3px; width: 7px;"></span>1</div>
</span></div>
<ul class="boardThumbs" style="margin: 4px 0px; padding: 0px;">
<li style="display: inline; float: left; height: 47.33333px; list-style: none; margin-left: 0px; padding: 0px; position: relative; width: 47.33333px;"><span class="hoverMask" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; -webkit-transition: background 0.04s linear; border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; bottom: 0px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; left: 0px; position: absolute; right: 0px; top: 0px; transition: background 0.04s linear; z-index: 100;"></span></li>
<li style="display: inline; float: left; height: 47.33333px; list-style: none; margin-left: 4px; padding: 0px; position: relative; width: 47.33333px;"><span class="hoverMask" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; -webkit-transition: background 0.04s linear; border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; bottom: 0px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; left: 0px; position: absolute; right: 0px; top: 0px; transition: background 0.04s linear; z-index: 100;"></span></li>
<li style="display: inline; float: left; height: 47.33333px; list-style: none; margin-left: 4px; padding: 0px; position: relative; width: 47.33333px;"><span class="hoverMask" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; -webkit-transition: background 0.04s linear; border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; bottom: 0px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; left: 0px; position: absolute; right: 0px; top: 0px; transition: background 0.04s linear; z-index: 100;"></span></li>
</ul>
</a><button class="Button Module ShowModalButton boardEditButton btn hasText rounded" style="background: linear-gradient(rgb(255, 255, 255), rgb(240, 240, 240)) rgb(240, 240, 240); border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; border: 1px solid rgb(204, 204, 204); color: #5f5f5f; cursor: pointer; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Helvetica, 'ヒラギノ角ゴ Pro W3', 'Hiragino Kaku Gothic Pro', メイリオ, Meiryo, 'MS Pゴシック', arial, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; font-weight: bold; margin: 0px 10px 10px; outline: none; padding: 7px 13px; position: relative; text-shadow: rgb(255, 255, 255) 0px 1px; vertical-align: middle; white-space: nowrap; width: 150px;" type="button"><span class="buttonText">Edit</span></button></div>
</div>
<div aria-disabled="true" class="item ui-draggable ui-draggable-disabled ui-state-disabled gridSortable" style="-webkit-transform: translateZ(0px); float: left; margin: 10px 5px 0px; width: 170px;">
<div class="Board Module boardCoverImage draggable noContext" data-component-type="1" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.219608) 0px 1px 2px 0px; background: rgb(255, 255, 255); border-bottom-left-radius: 6px; border-bottom-right-radius: 6px; border-top-left-radius: 6px; border-top-right-radius: 6px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.219608) 0px 1px 2px 0px; float: left; position: relative; width: 170px;">
<a class="boardLinkWrapper" data-element-type="36" href="https://www.pinterest.com/lucretiamccloud/crafts/" style="color: #555555; display: block; font-weight: bold; padding: 10px 10px 0px; position: relative; text-decoration: none;"><div class="boardName" style="-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased; font-size: 14px; height: auto; line-height: 18px; margin: 3px 1px 6px; overflow: hidden; position: relative; text-overflow: ellipsis; white-space: nowrap;">
<div class="BoardIcons Module pinCreate" style="display: inline-block; float: right; height: 16px;">
</div>
<div class="name" style="overflow: hidden; text-overflow: ellipsis;">
Crafts</div>
</div>
<div class="boardCoverWrapper" style="background-color: #eeeeee; clear: both; height: 101.38889px; overflow: hidden; position: relative; width: 150px;">
<span class="hoverMask" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; -webkit-transition: background 0.04s linear; border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; bottom: 0px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; left: 0px; position: absolute; right: 0px; top: 0px; transition: background 0.04s linear; z-index: 100;"></span><img alt="Crafts / by Lucretia McCloud" class="boardCover" data-load-state="pending" src="https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/216x146/2b/25/4f/2b254fc8e7793d1ed35f8fab2f2cd743.jpg" style="border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; border: 0px; clear: both; height: 101.38889px; max-width: 100%; vertical-align: middle; width: 150px;" /><span class="boardPinCount" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.2) 0px 0px 5px inset, rgba(255, 255, 255, 0.298039) 0px 1px 0px; -webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased; background-color: rgba(68, 68, 68, 0.701961); border-bottom-left-radius: 2px; border-bottom-right-radius: 2px; border-top-left-radius: 2px; border-top-right-radius: 2px; bottom: 3px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.2) 0px 0px 5px inset, rgba(255, 255, 255, 0.298039) 0px 1px 0px; color: white; left: 3px; padding: 3px 6px; position: absolute; text-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.701961) 0px -1px 0px;"><div class="Module PinCount">
<span class="pinIcon" style="background: url(https://s-passets-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/webapp/style/sprites/webapp-common-above_the_fold-2x-6bfc28da.png) -158px -130px / 214px 199px no-repeat; display: inline-block; height: 9px; margin-right: 3px; width: 7px;"></span>13</div>
</span></div>
<ul class="boardThumbs" style="margin: 4px 0px; padding: 0px;">
<li style="display: inline; float: left; height: 47.33333px; list-style: none; margin-left: 0px; padding: 0px; position: relative; width: 47.33333px;"><span class="hoverMask" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; -webkit-transition: background 0.04s linear; border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; bottom: 0px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; left: 0px; position: absolute; right: 0px; top: 0px; transition: background 0.04s linear; z-index: 100;"></span><img class="thumb" data-load-state="pending" src="https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/75x75/29/cb/13/29cb13ca65f49dc3e22140293b67e072.jpg" style="border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; border: 0px; height: 47.33333px; max-width: 100%; vertical-align: middle; width: 47.33333px;" /></li>
<li style="display: inline; float: left; height: 47.33333px; list-style: none; margin-left: 4px; padding: 0px; position: relative; width: 47.33333px;"><span class="hoverMask" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; -webkit-transition: background 0.04s linear; border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; bottom: 0px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; left: 0px; position: absolute; right: 0px; top: 0px; transition: background 0.04s linear; z-index: 100;"></span><img class="thumb" data-load-state="pending" src="https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/75x75/37/7f/fb/377ffb74e45032180bd129dbca6c637b.jpg" style="border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; border: 0px; height: 47.33333px; max-width: 100%; vertical-align: middle; width: 47.33333px;" /></li>
<li style="display: inline; float: left; height: 47.33333px; list-style: none; margin-left: 4px; padding: 0px; position: relative; width: 47.33333px;"><span class="hoverMask" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; -webkit-transition: background 0.04s linear; border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; bottom: 0px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; left: 0px; position: absolute; right: 0px; top: 0px; transition: background 0.04s linear; z-index: 100;"></span><img class="thumb" data-load-state="pending" src="https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/75x75/44/f1/2b/44f12b6b899fea6b8168fbbf989ce942.jpg" style="border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; border: 0px; height: 47.33333px; max-width: 100%; vertical-align: middle; width: 47.33333px;" /></li>
</ul>
</a><button class="Button Module ShowModalButton boardEditButton btn hasText rounded" style="background: linear-gradient(rgb(255, 255, 255), rgb(240, 240, 240)) rgb(240, 240, 240); border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; border: 1px solid rgb(204, 204, 204); color: #5f5f5f; cursor: pointer; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Helvetica, 'ヒラギノ角ゴ Pro W3', 'Hiragino Kaku Gothic Pro', メイリオ, Meiryo, 'MS Pゴシック', arial, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; font-weight: bold; margin: 0px 10px 10px; outline: none; padding: 7px 13px; position: relative; text-shadow: rgb(255, 255, 255) 0px 1px; vertical-align: middle; white-space: nowrap; width: 150px;" type="button"><span class="buttonText">Edit</span></button></div>
</div>
</div>
</div>
<div class="secretBoardWrapper" style="background: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.0470588); border-top-color: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.0470588); border-top-style: solid; border-top-width: 1px; padding-bottom: 14px;">
<div class="secretBoardHeader centeredWithinWrapper" style="color: #333333; font-size: 13px; font-weight: bold; margin: 0px auto; padding: 25px 0px 6px 10px; width: 360px;">
<span class="secretHeaderIcon" style="background: url(https://s-passets-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/webapp/style/sprites/webapp-common-above_the_fold-1x-c11aaa22.png) -204px -18px no-repeat; color: transparent; display: inline-block; font-family: serif; font-size: 0px; font-weight: normal; height: 16px; line-height: 0; text-shadow: none; width: 14px;"></span> <span class="sectionTitle" style="-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased; color: #444444; font-family: Helvetica, 'ヒラギノ角ゴ Pro W3', 'Hiragino Kaku Gothic Pro', メイリオ, Meiryo, 'MS Pゴシック', sans-serif; margin-bottom: 7px; margin-top: 20px; text-shadow: rgba(255, 255, 255, 0.498039) 0px 1px 1px;">Keep some boards secret</span><span class="text" style="color: #777777; display: inline-block; font-weight: normal;">—only you (and people you invite) can see these boards.</span><a class="help" href="https://www.pinterest.com/_/_/help/articles/all-about-boards/?qa=3&source=profile" style="color: #717171; display: inline-block; margin-left: 7px; text-decoration: none;">Learn more</a></div>
<div class="Grid Module" style="margin: 0px auto 38px; position: relative;">
<div class="GridItems Module centeredWithinWrapper fixedHeightLayout padItems ui-sortable" style="margin: 0px auto 10px; padding-bottom: 2px; position: relative; width: 360px;">
<div aria-disabled="true" class="item activeItem ui-draggable ui-draggable-disabled ui-state-disabled" style="-webkit-transform: translateZ(0px); float: left; margin: 10px 5px 0px; width: 170px;">
<a class="BoardCreateRep ModalTrigger Module" href="https://www.pinterest.com/lucretiamccloud/#" style="background: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.027451); border-bottom-left-radius: 6px; border-bottom-right-radius: 6px; border-top-left-radius: 6px; border-top-right-radius: 6px; border: 2px dashed rgb(187, 187, 187); box-sizing: border-box; color: #888888; cursor: pointer; display: block; font-size: 15px; font-weight: bold; height: 234px; position: relative; text-align: center; text-decoration: none; text-shadow: rgb(255, 255, 255) 0px 1px 1px; width: 170px;"><i style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgb(255, 255, 255) 0px 0px 2px inset; background: rgb(236, 236, 236); border-bottom-left-radius: 50%; border-bottom-right-radius: 50%; border-top-left-radius: 50%; border-top-right-radius: 50%; border: 1px solid rgb(207, 207, 207); bottom: 115px; box-shadow: rgb(255, 255, 255) 0px 0px 2px inset; height: 44px; left: 83px; margin-bottom: -8px; margin-left: -22px; position: absolute; width: 44px;"></i><span style="left: 0px; margin-top: 18px; position: absolute; right: 0px; top: 115px;">Create a secret board</span></a></div>
<div aria-disabled="true" class="item ui-draggable ui-draggable-disabled ui-state-disabled gridSortable" style="-webkit-transform: translateZ(0px); float: left; margin: 10px 5px 0px; width: 170px;">
<div class="Board Module boardCoverImage draggable noContext" data-component-type="1" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.219608) 0px 1px 2px 0px; background: rgb(255, 255, 255); border-bottom-left-radius: 6px; border-bottom-right-radius: 6px; border-top-left-radius: 6px; border-top-right-radius: 6px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.219608) 0px 1px 2px 0px; float: left; position: relative; width: 170px;">
<a class="boardLinkWrapper" data-element-type="36" href="https://www.pinterest.com/lucretiamccloud/beauty/" style="color: #555555; display: block; font-weight: bold; padding: 10px 10px 0px; position: relative; text-decoration: none;"><div class="boardName" style="-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased; font-size: 14px; height: auto; line-height: 18px; margin: 3px 1px 6px; overflow: hidden; position: relative; text-overflow: ellipsis; white-space: nowrap;">
<div class="BoardIcons Module pinCreate" style="display: inline-block; float: right; height: 16px;">
<span class="secretIcon" style="background: url(https://s-passets-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/webapp/style/sprites/webapp-common-above_the_fold-2x-6bfc28da.png) -168px -167px / 214px 199px no-repeat; display: inline-block; height: 16px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: -1px; width: 16px;"></span></div>
<div class="name" style="overflow: hidden; text-overflow: ellipsis;">
Beauty</div>
</div>
<div class="boardCoverWrapper" style="background-color: #eeeeee; clear: both; height: 101.38889px; overflow: hidden; position: relative; width: 150px;">
<span class="hoverMask" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; -webkit-transition: background 0.04s linear; border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; bottom: 0px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.329412) 0px 0px 2px inset; left: 0px; position: absolute; right: 0px; top: 0px; transition: background 0.04s linear; z-index: 100;"></span><img alt="Beauty / health / by Lucretia McCloud" class="boardCover" data-load-state="pending" src="https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/custom_covers/216x146/413205403250379457_1407894953.jpg" style="border-bottom-left-radius: 3px; border-bottom-right-radius: 3px; border-top-left-radius: 3px; border-top-right-radius: 3px; border: 0px; clear: both; height: 101.38889px; max-width: 100%; vertical-align: middle; width: 150px;" /><span class="boardPinCount" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.2) 0px 0px 5px inset, rgba(255, 255, 255, 0.298039) 0px 1px 0px; -webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased; background-color: rgba(68, 68, 68, 0.701961); border-bottom-left-radius: 2px; border-bottom-right-radius: 2px; border-top-left-radius: 2px; border-top-right-radius: 2px; bottom: 3px; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.2) 0px 0px 5px inset, rgba(255, 255, 255, 0.298039) 0px 1px 0px; color: white; left: 3px; padding: 3px 6px; position: absolute; text-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.701961) 0px -1px 0px;"><div class="Module PinCount">
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Lucretia McCloudhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07064997700656978645noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3766019299562717358.post-82701142209469466082015-08-26T23:10:00.002-07:002015-08-26T23:10:50.982-07:00To Adversity I RepliedHi Diamond followers!<br />
<br />
Diamond will post poems that she favors. Hope you will find them as enjoyable as she has:-)<br />
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<h1 class="title" style="color: black; font-size: 35px; font-weight: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px; position: relative;">
<a href="http://vigortality.blogspot.com/?m=1" style="color: black; text-decoration: none;">Livid But Live</a></h1>
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Livid when it comes to injustices! But grateful to be alive! Especially in these increasingly worsening times. "You're kidding!" you say. No. You've heard: "It was the best of times. It was the worst of times." Well, it is the same today. Follow along as I show you why.</div>
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Saturday, March 7, 2015</h2>
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<a href="https://www.blogger.com/null" name="8723557424046943969"></a><h3 class="post-title entry-title" itemprop="name" style="font-size: 24px; margin: 20px 0px 0px; position: relative;">
To #Adversity I Replied</h3>
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<b><u>To #Adversity I Replied</u></b></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="line-height: 26.4375px;">By Seah Greenhorn</span></div>
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<span style="line-height: 26.4375px;">(Poem with copyright)</span></div>
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<br />To Adversity I replied:<br /><br />"I won't stop breathing!<br /><br />Won't<br /><br />lie down and die!"<br /><br />No shameful cry:<br />"Uncle!"<br /><br />though, you demand<br />with fingers<br />snarled in my hair,<br /><br />Both hands<br /><br />entwined,<br /><br />mashing<br />my face<br />in sand.<br /><br />In Pit and Mire--<br /><br /><i>more aptly described.</i><br /><i><br /></i>Your goal<br /><br /><i>again</i><br /><i><br /></i>new<br /><br />for me to expire.<br /><br />"I won't stop breathing!"<br /><br />To Adversity I replied,<br /><br />When<br />you demand<br />I lie down and die!<br /><br />"Ludicrous! " you deny...<br />"Pit and mire?"<br /><br />"Okay!<br /><br />Demand--<br /><i>Insidiously</i><br />implied." ... You in effect,<br />maligning<br />my senses.<br /><br />I didn't stammer:<br />"I'm still<br />conscious;<br /><br />Not <i>totally</i><br />Senseless!"<br /><br />Crushed;<br />Suppressed--<br /><br />My Smile?<br /><br /><i>"No!"</i><br />Though, I've been burned.<br /><br />You<br /><br />Aware,<br /><br />Knowing<br /><br />even lips chapped<br /><br />Upturned,<br /><br />however cracked and bleeding,<br /><br />can elicit<br /><br />much <i>More</i><br /><br />than<br /><br />a spurn.<br /><br /><i>But,</i><br /><br />turn or roll me over<br /><br />Someone Special.<br />Please!<br /><br />Appease with these:<br /><br />Soft face,<br /><br />hand too,<br /><br />extended,<br /><br /><i>stretching </i>to ease.<br /><br />My eyes moistened by pain,<br /><br />still notes<br /><br />the slight tilt of your lids--<br />your eyes,<br /><br />when in compassion<br /><br />crinkles.<br /><br />Lifts<br /><br />my soul to the highs!<br /><br />Smile! Do Smile!<br /><br />Therein lies:<br /><br />expressed<br />hope<br />magnanimous!<br /><br />A heart<br />open,<br />warm<br />and generous!<br /><br />My chance to defy<br /><br /><i>again</i><br /><i><br /></i>To Adversity--<br /><br />with<br />help<br />to reply:<br /><br />"I didn't stop breathing<br />when you<br /><br />Commanded:<br /><br />"Die!"<br /><br />Based on: Isa. 41:13; 40:11; 2 Chronicles.16: 9; 1 Sam. 12:22; 1 Pe. 3:12; Acts 20:35; Eph. 4:32; Heb. 13:2.<br /><br />See also the Article: Are Your Problems A Punishment From God?<br /><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<a href="http://wol.jw.org/en/wol/d/r1/lp-e/102009012?q=adversity&p=par" style="color: #436590; text-decoration: none;" target="_blank">http://wol.jw.org/en/wol/d/r1/lp-e/102009012?q=adversity&p=par</a><div style="clear: both;">
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<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: Calibri Light;">Chapter Forty-Seven</span></span></h3>
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</div>
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<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">I heard the door open, but not close.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">A second later, the flick of a switch—the kitchen’s ceiling fan
and a click of the stove burner. . . . On or off?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Now I feel her over me.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Amazingly, through the slits of my eyes, the concern etched across her
features surprisingly warms me, watching as she stoops to peer into my face. .
. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Gawd, Diamond!”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“What!” my body jerking from her fright.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Vie stares down at me <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">disgusted?
. . . Why? </i><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“I thought you were dead.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Don’t ever scare me like that again.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>And what’s that smell?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Gawd,
Diamond, you stink,”—her words curbing any spot of humor I’d ordinarily feel
towards her fear.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Fine.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Leave me alone and let me sleep . . . on the
floor?</span></i><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;"> I realize; arching my back trying to snap out its stiffness.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Ah.</span></i><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I recall last night’s drama, asking; “Where’s
Crystal?” not remembering her rising.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Why you wanna know?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>To pin
that on her?” my eyes following Vie’s to a toppled empty wine bottle at my
knees.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoBodyTextIndent" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“That . . . that’s not mine,” I manage despite a tongue thick and
heavy, a mouth gone sour.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>“Look,
Vie.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Though it’s no concern to you; I
didn’t drink all that,” I defend myself against this mound of mock squatting
before me.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Crystal.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It belongs to her; it’s not mine.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Speaking of which</span></i><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">. . . <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Vie, where’s Crystal?” I ask again.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>“Why aren’t you answering? . . . Is she in
her bedroom?” the unbelievable reality of her leaving me on the floor painful,
especially after I returned for her.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Absolutely incredible</span></i><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“No, Diamond.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Not there
either.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Probably ran thinkin you were
gonna kill her.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoBodyTextIndent" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“What?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>What are you talking
about? … Kill her? … You’re crazy.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">I stare at her waiting for her to explain.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“The stove, stupid.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I saved
your life.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>You forgot to turn it off . .
. right?” the usual glint back in her eyes.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Backing up she begins to smirk.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>“Don’t tell me Mom’s tryin to get rid of you, wee lil’ Diamond?” she
asks, while her hand strokes her chin in wonderment.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>“Wow.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>I guess I really did save your life.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Well, how bout that?” she gloats, now leaning against the dining room
table; arms folded across her leather jacket covering the outfit . . . she wore
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">yesterday?</i><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Or is this the same day?<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Well, well.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I say you owe
me,” this meaningless pronouncement breaking my train of thought; though her
first words. . . <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Kill me.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>That’s ridiculous.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Crystal wouldn’t do that? . . . Why would she
want to?</span></i><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;"> as the number one reason comes to mind.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">But she couldn’t; could she? . .
. Would she?<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Remembering her look of hatred quickly saps my energy; leaves my
body limp with this extreme desire for no more pain.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>This thought: <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">just let me die,</i> shocking me into questioning my sanity.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">I quickly recognize the root stems from Vie and her bogus
insinuations.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Yes.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Vie is the negative and hateful one.</span></i><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>There’s no reason for me to think about
death.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoBodyTextIndent3" style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<em><span style="font-family: Calibri Light;">Yes.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Shake
it loose, Diamond.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Crystal turned off
the pilot when she lit her cigarette, remember?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Otherwise, the house would’ve blown up already?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Right?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>And why turn it back on? . . . . Lose the house because of me?<o:p></o:p></span></em></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Ludicrous!<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Though, <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">does the house really matter to her?</i></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;"><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><br /></i></span>
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;"><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">But she was too drunk to be that deliberate,
right?</i> I ask, again envisioning that occasional flash of hatred in her
eyes.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">No</span></i><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">, I deny
again, though my hand and heart flutters contradict my rational mind.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Dropping my head to my knees, a faint groan
escapes my throat, but my heart’s pace increases.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Yet, my mind’s constant reasoning hangs
steady intend on winning me logically.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Physically exhausted, a familiar release strains against my
lids.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Months into years I’ve fought this
exact moment.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Face-to-face with the
complete brutal truth: <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">Crystal and Madame
both hate me.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I knew it.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Always did.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Just wouldn’t believe it.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>And here
Vie stands to make sure I get it.<o:p></o:p></i></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Okay, I get it!</span></i><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;"> gripping
the thin fabric on my knees, I snort, unexpectedly snorting again, my hand
covering my mouth trying to suppress spewing sobs born from these recent
revelations suddenly curling me into a ball, the piano’s leg hard against my
back.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I let loose, my body jerking in
spasm, each convulsion tightening my muscles, negative truths attacking my
temples.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Disturbing moans continue to
escape me as if some wounded wolverine lies dying within.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">After some time, hiccups arrive, the leather of my jacket a
horrible cold handkerchief to my drippy nose, while shadows across the living
room’s mantel further confuse me as to the time of day.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Gawd, Diamond.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>How long
are you gonna lie there?” Vie’s disgusted tone emphasizing the true state of
our association.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Seeing the tips of her dirty cowboy boots, I ball up further to
escape the obvious: <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">that she’s incapable
of blinking in sympathy.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></i></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Come off it, Priss Miss.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Stop your sniffing or I’ll help?” a glance revealing a hand poised to
slap me her offer.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Amazingly the hiccups retreat and the occasional tear ceases in
anger, <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">let her try it,</i> my thought and
stare; but my joints boycott efforts to get up. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoBodyTextIndent" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“I can’t believe you,” she continues, though backing up.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>“Who would believe this is the same Queen Bee
stepping up in here not long ago.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Look at
you.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>And I thought I needed your
help.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>And just what‘d you do if your
life really was bad?” she asks.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">But Vie hasn’t a clue to my real
situation, </span></i><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">I think, staring up; fed up. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">Maybe
she’d be a little more sympathetic, if she did.<o:p></o:p></i></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoBodyTextIndent" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Holding out my hand I tell Vie to, “Help me up.”<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Instead she folds her arms tight beneath her
breasts infuriating me further.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Then I hear her; her “Meow.”<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Then again.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Angling towards the front door, I again try to stand.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Don’t you dare,” Vie screams.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>“Don’t you dare let that crazy cat in here!” she repeats, skirting the
dining room table into the far corner, rattling the glass knick-knacks on the
curio’s shelves, her voice rattling too.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Vie terrified of a cat?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Why?</span></i><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;"> I wonder, finding some energy to
refocus.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“That stupid cat attacked Crystal.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Do you hear me?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I saw her.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Crystal came practically skipping outta here
when that cat dropped on her from that tree like she was waiting for her,” she
explains, while pointing out of the window, more animated than I’ve seen her
recently. She continues, “Crystal screamed and could barely tear her off
her.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I bet she’s still on her way to the
hospital now.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I thought I saw her face
bleeding.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Staring at Vie, who doesn’t bulge an inch from her corner with her
eyes bucked in horror, the craziness of the whole situation almost caused me to
shout with laughter.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">A scarred face is the only way to
get a rise out of Vie?<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">No longer suspicious about who caused the cat’s disfigurement, I
swing back towards the continuing “meows,” seeing her distorted though still
beautiful face reminding me of another marred beauty. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Prudence.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“What?”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Nothing.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Nothing that she’d care to understand, but the cat now had a name.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Prudence,</span></i><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;"> for
Prudence Nobles—though Prudence would never attack anyone.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Yes, Prudence cared about people, although she needed help
herself.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The cat reminded me of
her.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Though crippled by age, her inner
strength and beauty still glows like the cats’.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Somehow, despite their tragedies they continued to cherish their
independent lives.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">And look at me</span></i><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Suddenly, I’m embarrassed; my plight pathetically not a
problem.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It took a name to remind me
that I had my own life apart from this back in New York.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">So why am I still sitting here?<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Someone once said, “When it gets dark enough, then you see the
stars.”<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Inwardly smiling, I bless
Prudence, visualizing her face, old, yet content, happy, always positive,
realizing, that’s the to way live—<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">live
your absolute longest with dignity</i>. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">With renewed effort, I crawl to my feet.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I saw survival through the cat, Prudence, and
amazingly Vie’s situation.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">She was right</i>.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>My drama disappeared.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I had no reason not to live my life with joy.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Bending, flexing, then groaning before heading to the stairs,
Vie’s, “Where are you going?” behind me causes my grin and my answer, “What do
you care?” automatically springs to mind.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>But I decide, no.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Leave it,
hesitating only a second with my hand on the banister, before turning my head,
smiling broader, answering with a great sense of satisfaction; “To shower.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I’ve got a plane to catch.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Yes, after years of trying to please Crystal who left me laid out
and alone in the dark, not to forget Madame also, the day finally beams bright.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">I whisper the words, “I’m going home.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Good.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I’m going with you,”
Vie answers back with the ears of an elephant.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>“I want to hear you play that sax.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoBodyTextIndent" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“What?” I ask spinning around.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Play the sax?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Now how does she know about that?</span></i><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;"> when I
remember what I overheard—her and Sky.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“I want to hear you play at Sax. . . You know.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Do your advertising thing at the store. . . Sax
Fifth Avenue, right?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>You know you
mentioned working that store before,” she says, wide-eyed and innocent.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“No Vie,” I answer, “I don’t think I did.” <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>But what her plans are I’m not interested in
figuring out.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">Right now I’ve got plans of my own to make</i>.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoBodyTextIndent" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">In the meantime, “Vie, I need you to watch out for Prudence; you
know--Emanon.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>She’s got a real name
now.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Watch her until I can come back for
her;” <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">then maybe I’ll help you</i>.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>With a child, HIV, and a boyfriend like Sky
in her life I think she may need it.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoBodyTextIndent" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“The cat?” Vie asks, repelled.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Yes, Prudence the cat.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Convince her to trust you, then maybe I will.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“A cat, huh? . . . Alright.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>I think I can handle that,” she agrees with guarded assurance; some
conceit.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>“But for how long?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>When will you be back?”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“I’ll let you know.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">But for now it’s time for me to fly like an eagle.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<h1 style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-bidi-font-weight: normal; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;"><span style="font-size: small;">The End<o:p></o:p></span></span></h1>
<br />
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</div>
<br />
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</div>
<br />
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</div>
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</div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<b><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Epilogue<o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Journal entry:<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Fri., Nov. 29th:<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Tonight she’s not alone.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">She’s happy; proud to accommodate many guests captivated by her
essence, her beauty enhanced by a Manhattan backdrop viewed in a windowed
wall.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Mesmerizing too? Her entertainers;
a trio—violinist, pianist and flutist, center stage.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">No wails she utters, no need for envy; she gently sways in
contentment.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">My barge endured, now beautiful and strong.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">While fellow music lovers gather around the table sampling wine,
coffee, and cookies I bite on the tip of my pen dangled over the page, wanting
to laugh out loud.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Those words, beautiful and strong not only applied to the barge,
they could and did apply to Cowen.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Cowen
Riley whose face two weeks ago displayed wonderful shock when I informed him of
my move back home to New York.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Why am I so tickled?<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
<br />
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<em><span style="font-family: Calibri Light;">Could there be a slight satisfaction in knowing
that maybe he wanted me around more than he cared to admit?<o:p></o:p></span></em></div>
<br />
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“So young lady.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>What’s so
funny?”—her southern drawl endearing.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">I look up smiling into those twinkling watery eyes, though still
intense, wanting to squeeze her frail little frame to life.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I had no words to describe how much I missed
her company.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Finally I say, “Oh.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Just
thinking about someone back in Chicago, that’s all.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Prudence smiles back; “Well, Honey, I’m glad to see that you can
still smile.”<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Looking at me a second longer she then asks, “How about a cup of
tea after the performance?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>My
granddaughter and I would love your company.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Smiling around Prudence to a young woman similar in age to myself,
I then glance down at my new leather journal entitled, Beginnings, and ask,
“How about a rain-check?” staying still as to my scheme to help Seneca capture
Sky.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Thin dry fingers amazingly caress my shoulders in a gentle
squeeze.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“A rain-check it is.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">As the musicians reclaimed the stage I quickly finished writing: <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
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<em><span style="font-family: Calibri Light;">Yes I remember those two months; they revisited me
involuntary and often, sometimes a nightmare; other times enlightening, a
poignant reminder that even though growing up is a mountain hard to maneuver,
the headiness you receive when you do exhilarates you . . . for the next climb.<o:p></o:p></span></em></div>
<br />
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">I recall Prudence once quoted, 2 Corinthians 4:16-18, which said,
“Therefore, we do not give up, but even if the man we are outside is wasting
away, certainly the man we are inside is being renewed from day to day. For
though the tribulation is momentary and light, it works out for us a glory that
is of more and more surpassing weight and is everlasting; while we keep
our eyes, not on the things seen, but on the things unseen. For the things seen
are temporary, but the things unseen are everlasting.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
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<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Shall I say “Amen”?<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
Lucretia McCloudhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07064997700656978645noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3766019299562717358.post-25500185492542545162015-06-09T08:20:00.001-07:002015-07-31T12:40:32.580-07:00Chapter Forty-Six...Is She On To Me?<br />
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<b><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Chapter Forty-Six</span></b></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhvb4TT_DgyYYHzwPJJ7RbyYd4m9oFaajuQN0xy3Wb9tpPuyxabQcrwytGU4Je3VVn3hatknQjhfWvil4zN_btZW1AG7Ei0tB2wmEHZ-TSKxnw74QU8rCfNJpHrwhyyZbHO9yQSeVNqukxN/s1600/6179cdcc09b92d94eccbceb1d10d34aa.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhvb4TT_DgyYYHzwPJJ7RbyYd4m9oFaajuQN0xy3Wb9tpPuyxabQcrwytGU4Je3VVn3hatknQjhfWvil4zN_btZW1AG7Ei0tB2wmEHZ-TSKxnw74QU8rCfNJpHrwhyyZbHO9yQSeVNqukxN/s320/6179cdcc09b92d94eccbceb1d10d34aa.jpg" width="320" /></a></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">A quick glance around the room and I take in all changes I made
trying to make this place home.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Painted
walls, inexpensive furniture and area rugs.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">A good attempt, but . . . </i><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoBodyTextIndent3" style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<em><span style="font-family: Calibri Light;">Well.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>There’s nothing I want to take.<o:p></o:p></span></em></div>
<br />
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Even the clothes I bought belonged to another persona; one made by
Mom.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">Yes,
she can have it all,</i> I concede on the staircase headed down.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Darn it,” I groan, hearing movement about; <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">she’s still up,</i> my back stiffening.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">I don’t need this, not another
confrontation,</i> on a slow descent down.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">I open the door to, “Going somewhere?” in slurred speech from
the kitchen.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">What happened to going into the bedroom and closing the door till a new
day?</i><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I had hoped we were done and
could make a smooth exit.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Yes,” I answer before glancing around the dining-room
doorframe.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">How did she know?</i><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">She waits leaning against the door-jam.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Home,” I finish headed towards the front door.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">That’s
sounds pathetic; I look pathetic … just slipping out like this, but…<o:p></o:p></i></span></div>
<br />
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Fine.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>But first we talk,”
she says from the stove, pouring tea; <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">probably
for a totty.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></i>Instead of the yellow
on the kitchen walls, I begin to see red.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>A fighting color, because she wanted a battle.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">Yeah,
I’ve wanted to talk.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>But my questions
she’d avoid like a skilled matador.</i><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>No amateur here.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">Yes, I wanted to know, what’s this between
you and Cowen?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Stalking?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Restraining order? . . . What’s that all
about?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Didn’t I deserve some answers?<o:p></o:p></i></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoBodyTextIndent" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">But, I am too tired for this
game; and that—the answers—would be too much to contemplate right now.<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
<br />
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">So I wait until Mom begins.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<br />
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">If it weren’t for her conduct yesterday I’d find a way to relax
and enjoy this moment, long overdue.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">It would be nice for me to go home with some
semblance of kinship.</i><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>To tell Madame
it was a success.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>That Mom and I
bonded.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>That her words, “she causes
death to everything” weren’t true.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>But I
doubt that this is the direction of this conversation.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Obviously she needs help beginning.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Mom.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Why didn’t you tell
me you knew Cowen Riley?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
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<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">If we could just put that at
rest.</span></i><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>All those times I’ve asked
Mom if she were dating anyone.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">True, it was her business, but when she had
an inkling about me, why didn’t she say anything?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>She could’ve told me that she loved him; and
from what I saw this morning I believe she does.<o:p></o:p></i></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Mom says, “Well, if you
must know, I didn’t think it necessary.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>How was I to know that you would meet?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>But you did.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>And I’m sorry, but I
had no inkling that you would fall for him.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>When Vie said you were I didn’t believe her.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Not that you couldn’t, I just thought you <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">wouldn’t</i>.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>He was <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">married</i>.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>But when you did I just didn’t <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">want</i> to believe it.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“But why didn’t you say something?” I ask.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoBodyTextIndent" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“I wanted to make sure it was him, so I called the agency when I
knew you wouldn’t be there—just to see if I recognized his voice.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>When I heard him I hung up.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>But why should I say anything?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>He was still married,” she said, sounding
defensive.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>“I never thought you would
fall in love with him.”<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">She seem to manage that clearly!</span></i><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“But you did, Mom!<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>At least
I held back my emotions until his wife died.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>I had some principles.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Madame
taught me that much.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“What are you saying, Diamond?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>That I didn’t live by those principles?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Remember that the last three years with Steve were ‘no picnic’
Diamond.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>During that time I met Cowen at
another agency.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>He reviewed Steve’s
insurance policy for me.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>His wife had
also just become ill.”<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“We sympathized with each other, started going to lunch to talk
and eventually fell in love.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It
happens.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>We both knew that it was wrong,
so we broke it off.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I’ve thought about
him often, and wondered what he was doing; but I didn’t pursue it—even after
Steve died.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Because he didn’t reciprocate</span></i><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">—that much
I’ve gathered from rethinking Vie’s insinuations.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoBodyTextIndent" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Then one day you spoke of him.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Now, here we are.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Why didn’t you say something, Diamond?”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoBodyTextIndent3" style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<em><span style="font-family: Calibri Light;">Is Mom for real?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>How many times did I try talking about him before I even started to have
feelings for him?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></em></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Thought that maybe you would say something to me, so I
waited.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>But when you didn’t I thought
everything was okay.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>That maybe you
didn’t love him.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">But what about that day on the
phone with Vie?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Did she hear that?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Diamond, I needed to see Cowen face-to-face, so I saw an
opportunity and took it,” she continues explaining.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Mom doesn’t sit at the table with me.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I notice she failed to pour herself a cup of
tea.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>She stands, leaning against the
sink, arms folded, looking at me intently.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>The stare lasts for a few seconds.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>It becomes frightening; I become antsy.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>This reminds me of the night of her sleepwalking.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoBodyTextIndent3" style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<em><span style="font-family: Calibri Light;">Is this side the one Madame spoke about? … Why is
she looking like this; what’s it all about?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>What’s the matter with her? <o:p></o:p></span></em></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">I don’t have long to wait for the answer.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Diamond, you know what I’ve come to realize; you want
everybody.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>You don’t share.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It was the same thing with Steve.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">What does she mean?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>What’s the same with Steve?<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Mom, what are you talking about?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Who is everybody?”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Seneca, Steve, now Cowen.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“What do you mean ya didn’t know; of course you knew.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I told you myself.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoBodyTextIndent3" style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<em><span style="font-family: Calibri Light;">What’s she talking about?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>She never said any such thing.<o:p></o:p></span></em></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Don’t look so stupid.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I
told you when you left me with Madame.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>You pouted and said something about wishing Steve were your father as
you got into the car.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">I remember that; <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">I’ve said
that enough,</i> with his kind concern for my well-being.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>“But wishing doesn’t make it so,” Madame said
that often enough.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Well?”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Well, what? . . . Yes, I’ve said that.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>So?”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Well, what did I say after that?”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">I don’t know!<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">But, I try to recall.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">What first comes to mind is the screaming, so loud, right above my
head.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I can almost hear that piercing
voice now.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I tried to cover my ears, but
it wasn’t enough; she stood right there blocking my exit.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Suddenly, <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">I
don’t know how she did it,</i> but my head flew back with force; like a fan
sucking my hair.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>But it wasn’t a
fan.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Mom dragged me across this same
floor, yelling, “Heifer, don’t you ever cover over your ears when I’m talking
to you.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoBodyTextIndent" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">I didn’t want to cry; Madame always said, “Don’t cry.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>If you cry you give them more power.”<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">But it
hurt;</i> it hurt so badly that the tears were squeezing out, because I closed
my eyes, tight.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">Honestly, what really hurt was not her pulling out my hair, though,
mind you I felt that too, but this was “Mommy.”</i><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">I shouted, “Why are doing this?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>I didn’t do anything,” but she kept pulling me till I was at his
feet—Steve’s, right by the piano.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Mom said, “Say, good-bye, Diamond,” <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">yet I couldn’t say it.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I didn’t
want to say it.</i><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">How could she be so mean; and how
could he love her?<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
<br />
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">I didn’t want to think about it anymore, though I remember; “You
called me a tramp.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“You were a tramp.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“But what did I do?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I was
only twelve.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“You knew what you were doing.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Always in his face, then his lap.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>You were a nasty little girl.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“No I wasn’t.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>He would talk
to me.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>No one ever talked to me.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>We didn’t do anything.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">I was again twelve; answering for her insecurities.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Her voice even held the same hatred, somehow
back in time.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“You tried to seduce him away from me.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I saw right through you, you little slut.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Madame taught you well, but she counted on me
keeping her little secret.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>You didn’t
know that Steve was your father.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>You
didn’t figure it out, did you?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I told
you; you’re dumber than I thought.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Steve? . . . Steve’s <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">not</i>
my father.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>You never said that. When did
you say that?”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Oh I told you alright.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Remember when you went to get in the car with Madame, I heard you say
you wished Steve were your father.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Well, I told you then.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I
whispered, ‘Sometimes wishes do come true.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoBodyTextIndent" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">She’s crazy! . . . That’s her telling me? . . . A girl of twelve?
. . . “Sometimes wishes do come true?”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Suddenly I want to laugh; really I do, at the absolute stupidity
of it all.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Wait a minute!<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Did Steve know?”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoBodyTextIndent3" style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri Light;"><em>What did it matter now? … </em><span style="font-style: normal;">But I had to know,</span><em> since he just let me walk right out of this
door. . . </em><span style="font-style: normal;">Did he know?</span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“You really <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">are</i>
stupid.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Why would I tell him that?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>So he could go running after you?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>That’s what you would’ve liked, wouldn’t you?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>But it didn’t happen that way, did it,
Diamond, dear.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>He chose me.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>He chose me over you fair and square.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoBodyTextIndent" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">I again start to breathe, knowing that if he had known, things
would have gone differently.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">My eyes start to burn.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>All those wasted years.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Who benefitted from them?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Mom?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">It doesn’t seem so.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">I repeat; <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">so Steve was my
father</i>.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Why didn’t I know?</span></i><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;"> . . . Though
in some ways I felt it, sitting down on the piano bench with my head in my
hands.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoBodyTextIndent3" style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<em><span style="font-family: Calibri Light;">Somethings not adding up.<o:p></o:p></span></em></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Diamond, Seneca is mine.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Understand?”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">I look at her, trying to read her eyes, certain she means Cowen.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">She’s confused</span></i><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“You have no ties with him,” she finishes.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">I keep looking at her to determine the extent of her drink, but
she no longer sounds drunk.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Where is this coming from?</span></i><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I thought things were going well.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Didn’t she just say in the most pleasant tone
that she wished Cowen and me well?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoBodyTextIndent3" style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri Light;"><em>This is like a thick fog.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>How do I get out of this mess?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>And how did Seneca get into this?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></em><span style="font-style: normal;">I continue
staring at her, thinking,</span><em> maybe she’s going to say, “I’m just
kidding.”<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></em><span style="font-style: normal;">I
wait, my tongue thick, heavy, and dry making it hard to swallow, wanting to
speak.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Watching her lips, I wait wishing
for them to curve into a smile and form loving words.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoBodyTextIndent" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">They don’t</span></i><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">My eyes fill with anger and pain, well up with tears.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoBodyTextIndent" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">In a voice low, but hard, Mom asks, “Diamond . . . just how stupid
are you?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Don’t you know by now that I’m
not your mother?”<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">This keeps getting worst and worst.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">Then
how was Steve my father--?</i><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Finally, my world explodes into fine dust particles right before
my eyes as she pauses for effect.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>My
mind tries to grasp the pieces; try to gather them back together; but it’s like
grabbing air.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">I reconsider; <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">maybe I heard
her wrong. . . What exactly did she say?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span></i><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Mom, what did you say?”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoBodyTextIndent" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“My gawd, you’ve lost your hearing too? . . . I said, ‘I am not
your Mom.’”<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>She emphasized each word
deliberately.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Coldly.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Somehow, I couldn’t comprehend.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>All my life I’ve been told that she was Mother.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">Why is
she saying this?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Why is she being so
spiteful?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>What have I done?</i><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">My mind races. . . <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">Is Madame
your mother?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Then what is she to me?</i><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Yes.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I see the pieces
starting to fit in that slow brain of yours.”<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Her words hurt like bites from a vicious dog loose from a
chain.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Funny, at a time like this I
remember a dog we once owned, a dog I forgot all about, because we had him such
a short time.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I loved that dog, but we
had to put him to sleep.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">I begin to cry.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Ah. . .How do you feel? . . . Foolish? . . . Used?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Like you were chasing a rainbow?”<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">She laughs.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>“You were.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Now you can stop.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">And yes, the reason for her anger fell into place.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Crystal still loved Seneca and she’s
jealous.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Of course, those were merely
speculations, but I had to know for sure before I could understand and excuse
this hatred.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Then who is <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">he</i>, Mom,
Crystal?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Who is he to me?”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“No one.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Those words hurt worst than anything she’s said thus far.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Who are you to me?”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Does it matter?”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Yes.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">She waits before she answers, still propped against the sink.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>And in this little span of time I watch the
steel rod of contempt bend—a bit.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Not
much.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“I’m your sister, silly. . . Surprised?”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Actually, now that it’s out—<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">No</i>.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>She never felt like a real Mom to me, but I
didn’t really have anything to compare it with, except a few of my friend’s
moms.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>And Madame did say that she didn’t
have a motherly attachment to me.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>That
would explain that.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>But I didn’t say a
word.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoBodyTextIndent" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">I just allow a numbness to wash though me.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Allow myself a void.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I became completely vacant inside like a
tube, a hollow hole.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Oh, the tears are
still present, stinging behind my eyes, but only requesting release.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>This deep pit of nothing but darkness,
spirals me softly downwards.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Not knowing
how long or how far I’ll fall doesn’t even scare me.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoBodyTextIndent" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Madame once told me that I didn’t know what it was like to be
alone.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I did.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I was alone often, even in her presence.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>She said she didn’t want me to be alone, but
she left me.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>However . . . at this
moment . . . I am completely alone.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Future prospects don’t count or appeal to me now.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>There’s only me.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">I’m intrigued.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">Can I actually continue to exist in this
emotionless state?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>And if so, for how
long?<o:p></o:p></i></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">My silence seemed to bother Crystal.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Did she have a touch of
conscience?<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Diamond, what happened in New York?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Why did he come all the way here to see you
and not me?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>You can’t be in love with
him, because you didn’t know . . . right?”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">I don’t utter a sound.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">No, she doesn’t have a conscience.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>She has curiosity</i>.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<br />
<div class="MsoBodyTextIndent" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Her eyes take on a glint that I noticed before, but ignored
because I felt I had imagined it—a look of hatred.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Did you know, Diamond?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Are
you playing with me?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Did Madame tell you
and you’re trying to get back at me? . . . That’s it, isn’t it? . . . You came
here for revenge, didn’t you?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I don’t
know why I even let that Octavia Hunter talk me into sending you for.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I should’ve let well enough alone.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">So that proves it?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Vie was responsible for Mom, Crystal, sending
for me</span></i><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoBodyTextIndent" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">And who is Madame to us?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>If
she is Crystal’s mother, does that make her my mother too?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>And if that is the case, could it be that she
really doesn’t love me either?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>That she
just wishes that I go on and live my life and let her live hers without me? <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Am I that big of a problem?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">My muteness antagonized her further.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">This is too much to consider all at once.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I’m confused.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>If Steve is my father and she is my sister, who is out mother?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">Is she
saying that I’m adopted; that I’m only a half-sister?</i><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">Because
surely she isn’t saying that Madame and Steve are both my parents.<o:p></o:p></i></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">She’s playing with me.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>None of this makes any sense!<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Now anger fills the void.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Until a moment ago I fought to gain the love
and attention of a woman who I <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">knew</i>
to be my mother; happily battled for the relationship.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I even thought I had jeopardized the love of
Madame to find out that she had sent me on a wild goose chase.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">For what?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>For this?<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">I am here under totally false pretenses, had been threatening a
mental collapse, <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">for what?</i><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">For who?</i>
<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">Who’s
really who?</i><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Mom . . . or whoever you are.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Right now you’ve told me more than I need or want to know,” I say, while
the tears stream down my face.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Funny.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I came here searching for a connection; love
of family and found foes.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Vicious blood enemies,</span></i><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;"> I assume.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I gained new battle scars and yet I am still empty-handed;
heavy hearted.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">I look at this woman as I get up to leave the kitchen.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Crystal White</span></i><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoBodyTextIndent" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">I seethe inside, for a hatred against everyone, Madame, Crystal,
Vie, but mainly for myself.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Towards
Madame for initiating this mess.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Towards
Crystal for being my mirror me.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Towards
myself for the person I’ve become.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">You can’t handle loneliness and I
pity you.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Pity the time you will have
ahead</span></i><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">To think, <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">she maneuvered me
into a job I didn’t want and had me live a life for her, when she had no
right.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></i></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Reaching the front door I seem to feel rather than hear the words,
“Don’t leave me,” barely a whisper.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I
turn around and see her a broken heap near the piano bench.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>In the darkness of the room she’s not be quite
distinguishable as a human.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Her spirit
crumbled, she’s now a broken mast on the dining room floor.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoBodyTextIndent" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">I stop, my hand on the doorknob.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“She lied, Diamond.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It was
all a big lie.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The marriage, the baby,
everything. . . Then they all left me, Diamond.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Everyone.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I don’t have anyone,”
she said in almost a whisper.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>“Please
don’t leave. . . I’m afraid.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">I knew her fear and pain, know it, because it was my fear and
pain.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>My reoccurring nightmare; the one
I’ve avoided like death by a speeding train, except the train keeps hitting me
over and over.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>But I still live through every
sneaky moment it creeps in; though at times it has me praying for death.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">I walk back over to my sister, trying to lift her without
success.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>She stayed a dead mass, so I
slide down the piano leg now supporting my back.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>My arms encircle her as I rock back and forth
as she once occasionally rocked me.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Rejection is horrible.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Humiliating.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Rips you of all
pride.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Sitting here, the smell of alcohol escaping through Crystal’s
pores, I wonder; <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">is this the way I will
end up?</i> hating the idea, but totally lacking any energy to fight it
anymore.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Gazing into the fireplace, logs long cold, I repeat Seneca’s
words, “You’re no different.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>You’re just
like them,” his strong face stronger in anger, as he swore to never see me
again.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">I didn’t mean it,</span></i><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;"> I believe,
holding Mom, amazed at the enormity of her love for him.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">How was
I to know that it would turn out that way?<o:p></o:p></i></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">My intent was revenge.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I
always loved him; hated myself for betraying him.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Mom’s limp body in my arms and light snoring leaves me alone
again.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
Lucretia McCloudhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07064997700656978645noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3766019299562717358.post-465486983443683912015-06-09T08:17:00.000-07:002015-06-09T08:17:03.891-07:00Chapter Forty-Five...Is She On To Me?<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<b><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Chapter Forty-Five<o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
<br />
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiWDMWDks383iYTwJ19hTAA-BW4flf-27ASQjE6Q5u1UqKTyZddUhLPswGkNkM248t-PQbEPlW84hB_qYr0Ua0l40M1sZ8_FCnvHuXdYQE83cwjgUk6BsZoBvuc9XnJyYawYzcNItT2PzZX/s1600/f1357ee69f3b3b00255ee1cf9973fdd8.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="224" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiWDMWDks383iYTwJ19hTAA-BW4flf-27ASQjE6Q5u1UqKTyZddUhLPswGkNkM248t-PQbEPlW84hB_qYr0Ua0l40M1sZ8_FCnvHuXdYQE83cwjgUk6BsZoBvuc9XnJyYawYzcNItT2PzZX/s320/f1357ee69f3b3b00255ee1cf9973fdd8.jpg" width="320" /></a></span></div>
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<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Crashing through, under, cold wet wispy arms of the willow, coughs
crimp me over, collapsing me head-and-shoulder against bark.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Clawing its body, I hang on for shaky
moments, before finally composed enough to lean doubled over on my knees.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I take deep breathes as I wipe my palms
against my thighs, but decide instead to slide my body down the trunk of the
willow, indifferent about damp grass wetting the seat of my pants.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Great</span></i><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I can’t believe now I have hiccups.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">Sky’s
scary comments probably incited them.</i><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Did he really mean to harm
Seneca?<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Sky</span></i><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">—what a fake
name.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>That name was so promising.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">What
happened to my hero?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Did he mean to harm
me too?<o:p></o:p></i></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">What he said definitely put a different spin on that night.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">Maybe
Sky wasn’t helping me get away.<o:p></o:p></i></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Sitting here underneath the dangling limbs with a full moon
lighting the night, the river adds a chill to the night air, freezing my flesh
in penance for stupidity; though definitely relieved that I don’t have to worry
about HIV.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">After a while, I still sit, even with the cold evening wind
blowing off the river.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I guess I wait
wishing for someone to reassure me, to come strolling over and wrap me in his
arms, or even to just squat in front of me in an effort to convince me that I’m
important.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>But the cold is the only
company I keep.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Tiresome company,
sending me in chilled and apprehensive.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Coming through the back porch into the kitchen, I’m hit with a
very strong odor, one not smelled since my old rounds of the jazz circuit—<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">cigarette smoke</i>.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Who’s smoking?</span></i><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;"> I wonder,
hanging my coat on the kitchen wall hook.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">When I turn around, there’s my answer, Mom leaning against the
door jam with a lit cigarette between her fingers and a shot glass in her hand,
both hands trembling like a junkie’s.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoBodyTextIndent" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Don’t look so surprised.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>It’s just . . . you know, every once in a while I need it; and today I
need,” she says, finishing her words with her lip caught between her
teeth.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Her puffy bloodshot eyes
testifying to her claim.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">I almost ask, <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">what’s the
matter?</i> <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Almost feel sorry for her if
it weren’t for the beating she gave my emotions yesterday.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">I’m not
ready for anyone’s drama</i>.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">The mental thought is braver than my real emotions.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>About to squeeze by Mom still in the doorway,
she says, “I thought I saw you out there in the dark.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>What made you come in?”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoBodyTextIndent" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“It’s cold,” I say, waiting patiently to get by.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Yeah, I felt it when you opened the door.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Between drags, her eyes keep darting nervously to the kitchen
window towards the backyard; but she finally makes room to let me by.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Why don’t you sit down in at the dining room table; I’ll make you
some tea to warm you up,” she says.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“That’s okay Mom.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I’ll be
alright,” wanting to go upstairs to pack.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>“I’m really tired, okay?” I say.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">Goodness knows I’ve heard those words often
enough from her</i>.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“No, no.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Sit down.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It won’t take long.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Laying the shot glass and cigarette on a saucer on the kitchen
counter she puts on the kettle.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">The curl of smoke coming off the edge of the cigarette spurs a
coughing spell.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>“Mom, do you really need
that?” second hand smoke killing me faster than her.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Yes, Diamond.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Today I
do.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Why don’t you get your cough syrup,”
she says with a sudden edge to her voice, again looking out the back window,
making me wonder; <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">What’s out there?</i><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">As the teakettle starts to whistle, she grabs the dishes from the
cabinet.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Getting up to help her, she says, “No, sit down; I’ve got it.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Another cigarette now hanging from her lips, she hands me the cup
and saucer, saying, “Here, hold the cup while I pour.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">As I watch the ash hanging off the end of her cigarette growing,
speculating about where it will land, I suddenly drop the cup and saucer, the
searing pain on my thumb, causing me to bite my lip and my eyes to water, as
glass shatters on the dining room tile, skidding across the room.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The chair overturned as I jumped up to run
and hold my hand under the cold water tab, screaming; “You burned me!” tasting
blood; while, “Stupid girl!<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I told you
hold it.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Now look what you’ve done,”
trails me.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">She finally smashes the burning end of her cancer log into a
broken fragment of the saucer.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">I again say, softer, in shock, “Mom you burned me,” but she’s not
interested.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>She rushes to the front door
leaving me to tend to myself.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Breathing difficult, I think; <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">I’m
not cleaning that up,</i> as a car door slams, and she continues to peer out
between the blinds.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Curiosity and hand burning equally, I refuse to ask, “Who is
that?” though dying to know who or what has Mom’s undivided attention.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Instead I hold it in, figuring, <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">if it’s someone coming here, I’ll find out
in a minute anyway, </i>hoping I moved to the sink fast enough not to scar.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">But instead of someone arriving, I hear an engine turning over and
a car driving off.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Still watching her, I wonder, <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">a
neighbor leaving demands that much attention?</i> letting the water continue
running over my hand; buying time to see if she would come to me realizing her
lack of compassion.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Or at least her
destination the broken glass.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">But instead she oversteps pieces of glass that flew into the
dining room.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>She returns to lean again
against the door jamb of the kitchen, this time her nervousness gone and an
angry bend to her posture—her arms folded across her chest.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Her eyes harden just the tiniest bit.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">What’s with her? </span></i><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">I wonder,
getting a bit worried.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I turn off the water
and go to pick up the pieces, but she says, “Leave it.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">For who?<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Have a seat,” she commands, “at the table” referring to the
breakfast table.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">I obey.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“I’ll pour another cup of tea.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>You may also need your cough medicine,” she says.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>“I think I have another bottle in the
medicine cabinet if you need more?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>That
cough sounds disgusting.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">I didn’t even notice I had started.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“You always did get sore throats easily,” she says, that
surprising statement practically bringing me to tears, amazed that she recalled
anything of me personally.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I wanted to
believe that she <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">could</i> care.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Why did she remember that, was
she ever concerned?<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Suppressing the coughs I say, “Thanks, Mom, but I don’t need it
any more.”<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I do want it, badly; however,
I’ve decided I don’t need it.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Yesterday
made me realize <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">I need to be totally
aware of everything that’s going on around me,</i> because lately the line blurs
between reality and nightmares.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>“It’ll help; are you sure
you don’t want it?” she says, the question along with her stare macabre.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Or is it because I’m already on
edge?<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“I’m sure.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Thanks anyway,”
I say.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Okay,” she concedes, pouring my tea at the stove, the cheeriness
of the room in direct conflict with the overall status of my spirits.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>“But we need to talk.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Like I haven’t tried,</span></i><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;"> I think, my
body slack and my throbbing hand limp in my lap as I wait for her to begin.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Mom changes positions; now seated she leans back against her
chair, her arms still folded across her chest.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoBodyTextIndent" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Diamond, what I really want to know is … did you know about
Seneca, that he’s not your father?”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">My cup begins to rattle against the saucer.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Setting it down on the table, I answer
slowly; “Ah … Yes, yes I knew,” not looking up.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Oh boy, here it comes, accountability; the numb hollowness
vanquished.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">I’m not prepared for this,</i> I realize, guilt threatening to drown me
in its sudden downpour.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Where did it come from—the
question?</span></i><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;"> I wonder, sweat rolling down my sides.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">Why
now?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Where is this going?<o:p></o:p></i></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">I get up from the table, taking both cup and saucer to the sink,
determined to walk steady, inwardly pleading; <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">please don’t ask when did I find out?</i><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Completing my task, I turn around to her staring at me; then
suddenly she gets up and goes back into the living room.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Relief.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoBodyTextIndent" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Watching from the kitchen, I see Mom grab a packet of envelopes
from behind a picture on the mantel; she returns.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“These came for you today,” she says setting them down on the
dining room table before me—<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">the batch of
letters!</i> held together by brown string.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>I knew them without touching them.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>I sent them regularly to Seneca years ago.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
</div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Stepping through the broken glass I sit down on the piano bench,
my legs too spongy to hold me.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Afraid to pick them up, but craving to and wanting to ask, <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">did he bring them?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Was he here?</i> I sit silent.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">I glance up at Mom waiting for her explanation.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“No, Diamond.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Seneca wasn’t
here.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">My heart drops, while I struggle to hide my disappointment,
repress tears; Mom’s smug expression making it possible.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">I felt my face question, <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">then
who?</i> while my heart stayed with my previous hope.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoBodyTextIndent" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Some young man, a handsome young man, maybe someone you dreamed
about,” she says again taking a seat, this time right next to me on the piano
bench.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">The man in the taxicab? <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The one I supposedly dreamed?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>He brought the letters?</span></i><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">I lean to pick up the stack, thumbing through.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Who had Seneca’s letters?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>And what’s he doing with them? … Was it Sky?<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Angry, but more nervous with Mom beside me, I decide, <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">I’d better start talking.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>If I don’t soon things may get messier.<o:p></o:p></i></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoBodyTextIndent" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">But I don’t want to say too much.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Mom, when I wrote those letters I didn’t know who Seneca was for
sure.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>And anyway, I was fourteen.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I didn’t think it would do any harm to keep
in touch?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>… Mom, did the man say who he
was and why he had my letters?” I ask hoping to divert the issue.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“He said he sublet the loft from Seneca and Seneca left those
behind,” she adds still smirking.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>“Did
Madame put you up to writing him, Diamond?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Or did you think to do this on your own?”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
</div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Debating quickly, knowing she already hates Madame, I think: <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">I could just say yes,</i> but that won’t
help unite them.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Yet, <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">if I say I did it on my own she’ll hate me
too.</i><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>And actually it was a little of
both.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">Madame did suggest I write; but at the time I also wanted to</i>.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoBodyTextIndent" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Say something, Diamond!<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Mom, Madame had nothing to do with it.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>My god, Mom, isn’t it natural for a girl to
want to know her father?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>That’s all I
was doing, trying to get to know him,” I say speaking fast.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>If she read the letters she would know that
much.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“So now that you know he isn’t,” she says standing over me, “How
do you feel?”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoBodyTextIndent3" style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<em><span style="font-family: Calibri Light;">Now we’re treading on dangerous grounds.<o:p></o:p></span></em></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“I was devastated,” I answer, hoping that’s enough.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“You know what I think,” she says, walking into the kitchen.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I can tell she’s lighting another cigarette
at the stove, but she keeps talking.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>“I
think Madame had, <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">has</i> plans for
you.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Matter-of-fact, I know it.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The question is whether or not you will go
along with those plans.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoBodyTextIndent" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">She comes back to lean against the doorframe, her jitters of
earlier seemingly stabilized by smugness.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>However, I’ve caught her previous jitters, wishing this conversation to
die.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Actually, Madame didn’t tell me about Seneca until last year,
although I already knew.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I knew since I
was four.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I overheard them talking about
it.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">But, just because he’s not my
stepfather didn’t mean I couldn’t contact him, right?</span></i><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;"> since he
was like a father to me at one time.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">And how was I to know that Mom would
reappear ten years later?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>She never
wanted me around.<o:p></o:p></i></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">What’s with all these
questions?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>And why is she just standing
there?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Waiting?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>For what?<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">I wait too for the answer to: <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">Who
really was the guy that dropped off the letters? . . .<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Why won’t she say?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It couldn’t have been Sky.</i><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">But I’ll save those questions for after she finishes with hers.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Mom, I’m really tired.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Is
there anything else you want to talk about?” the second hand smoke a fog.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“No, not right now,” she says blowing the smoke in my face.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>“We’ll talk again later.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">With that dismissal I slide along the bench; off; then proceed
upstairs, feeling relieved, guilty, and exhausted, hoping that everything will
work itself out.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">But how?</i><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">I feel the walls caving in.<o:p></o:p></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;"><a href="http://www.rosilindjukic.com/2015/05/confronting-toxic-people.html">http://www.rosilindjukic.com/2015/05/confronting-toxic-people.html</a></span></div>
Lucretia McCloudhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07064997700656978645noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3766019299562717358.post-92078524597146503162015-06-09T08:09:00.001-07:002015-06-09T08:09:38.295-07:00Chapter Forty-Four...Is She On To Me?<br />
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<b><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Chapter Forty-Four</span></b></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">I strain to see the clock.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
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<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Only forty-five minutes have
passed?</span></i><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;"> since I last looked out of the window.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">It’s
not a new day?<o:p></o:p></i></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Swinging my feet into my slippers, I wonder if I dreamed the man
in the cab.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>And funny.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Something about my dream and the appearance
of the man on the sideway convince me that I should pay Madame another visit
before I leave.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Grateful for the quality
work the carpenters did on the steps I quietly steal down the steps.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The door of Mom’s bedroom is closed—a sure
sign that she’s inside.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">I slip out the front door, and as I insert the key into the
ignition, Mom comes running out of the house down the walk.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I see rather than hear her calling after me,
but I just keep driving with a small—very small—sense of satisfaction.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I knew I should have asked her to borrow the
car.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I continue driving, but suddenly
the desire to see Madame again fades.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>So
I decide instead to drive Lake Shore Drive and downtown Chicago, not knowing
when I would have this opportunity again.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Trying not to cry, I eventually turn the car around, heading towards my
old home.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Somehow, I find myself back in front of Mom’s house, still
dazed.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Still not ready to head into the
house afraid of what I might find there I head around back to the willow to
regroup.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I don’t know what mood Mom may
be in.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>If Cowen saw me earlier, maybe
she did too and her reason for following me out of the house was for
confrontation.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Which reminds me of
earlier times, best forgotten times.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Times I refuse to repeat.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;"><span style="mso-tab-count: 1;"> </span>Before heading to the weeping
willow, I decide to talk with Vie.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">This puzzle has too many gaps.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Maybe she has more warnings that I should
know about.</i><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>And I want to know: <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">why didn’t she say something sooner?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Also, I have my own warning for her from
Cowen about work tonight.</i><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Instead of walking down the sidewalk, I cut across the back lawns
planning the rest of my evening, all-the-while planning my exit.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
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<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">After talking with Vie, I’ll head
back to the house to get my things, then call a taxi for Mid-way’s
Airport.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>For November the weather is
pretty good, not too cold.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I should
probably be able to get a flight out.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>I’ll even take stand-by.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The
weather in New York will probably be similar.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>I’m looking forward to that!<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">So as not to disturb Vie’s mother I always used to use the side
walkway to the door.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Vie’s mother still
worked long hard hours; she was rarely there with Vie.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>And <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">before</i>
when she was there she had no energy to deal with Vie.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">She had her during the change.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>That was probably why Vie was so thin and little growing up.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">But was
that a growth spurt that she hit?</i> thinking about her newly acquired assets.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">I see a small light in the back window, and I hear Vie’s giggle.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">The window must be open.<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">I wonder, <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">who’s that with
her? </i>though reluctant to continue.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">In the past if Vie had company I would just leave.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It was never “the more the merrier.”<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>But this time I decide wait to see if the
person is about to leave, since I really want to talk with her before saying
good-bye.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Hearing Vie’s voice again, I’m still not able to make out the
words.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>But by her tone, low and
seductive, I figure <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">it’s a man--</i>she
entertaining.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">Maybe I should call her</i>.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Reaching into my coat pocket, just about to walk away to dial her
from my cell phone, the male voice stops me dead in my tracks.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">He’s asking, “Why you trippin’? . . .You’re the one who had me
look her up.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Now, with her anger up I hear her, “But I didn’t mean for you to <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">like</i> her.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“What makes you think I do? . . . Just because I’ve got her diary?
. . . I thought you wanted it.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Get all
her deep thoughts.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“You’ve got her journal?”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Yeah.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>You proud of me?”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Screaming, I can hear by his grunt that she’s obviously landed on
him, saying, “Proud of you?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Are you
kidding?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>You bet I am.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Sky’s tone goes deeper, “Then show me how much.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Glued to my spot, I think: <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">Surely
that is not Sky’s voice!<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>And surely that
are not talking about my missing journa? … Is this what I think I am
hearing?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>That Vie initiated my meeting
Sky, if that is his name?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>… And if she
did, was she also responsible for Mom getting in touch with me?<o:p></o:p></i></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Anger has me creeping to the window to take a look at these two
monsters with my own two eyes.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I refocus
on her saying, “You know what this got me the last time,” her voice instantly
serious, closer to the window.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“You were supposed to take care of that, speaking of which, what
happened to the kid?” he asks casually.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Kid?<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">A silence, maybe long in my mind, exists causing me to hold my
breath.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<em><span style="font-family: Calibri Light;">No giggling Vie, now.<o:p></o:p></span></em></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“What?” he asks, suddenly angered.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>“Don’t get indignant with me.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“You want to know where <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">is
she?</i> . . . <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">Now</i> you want to know?
. . . Where were you when I was having it?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>You know I almost died; I almost died <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">having</i> her.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Did you know?”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Who told you to have it?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I
didn’t.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I told you get rid of it; but
since you didn’t, I want to know where she is.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Did you think that when you left I would keep her?” Vie asked her
tone razor sharp.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Let me ask you again; where is she?”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Let go of me; you’re hurting my arm.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“If you don’t answer me your arm won’t be the only thing I hurt.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Suddenly Vie laughs.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“What do you care?” she asks, her voice filled with pain and
disgust.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">I wonder: <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">what should I do?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Does
she need my help?<o:p></o:p></i></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">About to standing on tiptoe I stop when I hear Vie laughing again
her spiteful laugh.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Who do you think you are?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Did you really believe I’d take care of a sick baby after you left me?”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoBodyTextIndent" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“I didn’t leave you.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“You weren’t here.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Don’t try to put this all in my lap. . . What about you?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>You’re no saint yourself.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>You should be glad that I even came back.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>You think I like knowing that you gave me
Aids?”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Aids?<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“You’re such a liar!<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>You
don’t have Aids!”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“HIV.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>What’s the
difference?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Point is, I got it from
you.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“You don’t know that!<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>You’re no saint.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Anyway,” Vie’s
voice changes again, “you should be happy that I even want to talk to you.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Why did you come back?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Miss me?”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Torn between wanting a good look at these two and afraid of
getting caught, I stay put, wanting to know, <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">where do I fit into this picture?</i><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Of course I missed you.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>You
know I did.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>And I have to admit you look
good.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>What?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Is that outfit for me or are you working
tonight?”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Yeah, I’m working; but I’ve got time.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Unfortunately, Vie, honey, I don’t.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Diamond’s dad is playing at the Regal
tonight, so I gotta run.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>But maybe I can
stop back by?”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“I thought earlier you said . . . why are you going to the Regal?”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Just business.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“What business?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>What do you
care about Diamond’s dad?”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Look, Vie.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Don’t go
sounding all jealous on me; you’re the one that gave me this idea.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“What idea?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I just told you
to keep an eye on her, not get involved with her dad.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Sky, I’m telling you.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>She’s not your type, she comes from crazy.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Comes from crazy?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>What are
you talking about?”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Diamond’s mom, Crystal is crazy. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The woman is giving Cowen fits.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Who’s Cowen?”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Diamond’s employer.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>He’s ‘Hot’
and Crystal’s been stalking him, even harassing his wife. At least she did
before she died.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Who did what before she died?”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Harassed her.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>You
listening?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Crystal harassed Cowen’s wife
to death.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>So if you go falling for her
you’re crazy.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>You know what they say, ‘A
apple don’t fall too far from the tree.’”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Sky starts laughing, which I know infuriates Vie.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>“But Vie.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>What do you think I’m doing?”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“I don’t know?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>What are talking
about?”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Why am I here?”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“You said ‘for me’.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Well, partly, but you know I need money, right?”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“I guess, but I’ve got money.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“That’s good, we’ll need it.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>But I’ve also got a plan that includes Diamond’s dad, Mr Raven.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>And it calls for a little honest
stalking.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>So Vie, don’t they also say,
‘don’t knock it til you’ve tried it’?”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoBodyTextIndent3" style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<em><span style="font-family: Calibri Light;">Vie must have given him some weird look for that
statement--.<o:p></o:p></span></em></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“But look, I’ve really got to go; I’ll tell you how it works out.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">At those words I also take off racing back across the neighbor’s
lawns to our backyard, my heart beating wildly in my chest, from the quick
exertion or the newly found knowledge, I don’t know which.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">But I don’t want him to see me.</span></i><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
Lucretia McCloudhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07064997700656978645noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3766019299562717358.post-5179712941473656292015-06-09T08:03:00.001-07:002015-07-31T12:27:50.973-07:00Chapter Forty-Three...Is She On To Me?<br />
<h1 style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;"><span style="font-size: small;">Chapter
Forty-Three</span></span></h1>
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<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiw1eEp5l-77omWMibUgLtp2AjuJAWsu8sgp0lvt8wXvenkkK3XeL7p3t72-fZ4Q_ny8yjovFYRf0DTEG98oElAnRVSLxlSAIQJPiOpkc8M3hamPhyphenhyphenLjzSu68mpjSwgR22hWFEs_8wq0ajR/s1600/b2acbb8e9640d576a935a323d5f4ac89.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiw1eEp5l-77omWMibUgLtp2AjuJAWsu8sgp0lvt8wXvenkkK3XeL7p3t72-fZ4Q_ny8yjovFYRf0DTEG98oElAnRVSLxlSAIQJPiOpkc8M3hamPhyphenhyphenLjzSu68mpjSwgR22hWFEs_8wq0ajR/s320/b2acbb8e9640d576a935a323d5f4ac89.jpg" width="261" /></a></div>
<br /></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Traffic crawls, the ordinary bumper-to-bumper agony, less so with
a gray BMW trailing visible through my rear view mirror.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Cowen’s steadfast eyes keep me in sight
following me to the airport’s drop-off point.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">What a gentleman,</span></i><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;"> I
concede.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>To ensure that I make it home
safely after turning in the rental car after all the drama I caused him.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">No
wonder Mom couldn’t help falling for him.</i><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Anxious about his waiting,
I tap the car keys on the counter a signal for the woman at the computer to
hurry.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I will pay you whatever you wait,
I want to scream, but bite my tongue instead for a peek behind me reveals an
extremely long line of irritated individuals making me happy that I’m not her
standing behind the counter.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Finally after another ten minutes I race out; winded but
apologizing, “Hey, sorry to keep you waiting.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>I guess this isn’t a good time to be returning a car,” I finish as he
leans over to open the door for me.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I
slammed the door shut just as a police officer arrives.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Cowen pulls off into a steady stream of cars
before he can say, “Keep moving.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoBodyTextIndent" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Sitting quiet, I wonder if he’s thinking about this afternoon’s
incident; but I’m too afraid to want to push it.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>So, folding my hands in my lap, I watch the
strip of fast food restaurants pass realizing how hungry I am, anxious that
I’ve held him up long enough.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Want something to eat?”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“No.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>No, that’s all
right.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I’m not hungry.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Why did I lie?<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Well I am.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Mind if I stop
for a second.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I’ll go through the
drive-thru,” he says turning into Arby’s.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>“You sure you don’t want anything?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>My treat.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Oh no.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>That’s really sweet
of you.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>But no thank-you,” talking loud
to camouflage my growling stomach, which I instantly draw in.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">I glance at my middle, then at him, smiling, “Well, maybe a turkey
sandwich.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">When he pulls up to the window, the girl flirts shamelessly with
Cowen as he hands her the money.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>When
she stoops down a little further, I glance at her from beneath my lashes with a
secret little smile causing her smile to evaporate, though I rode the same boat
as she—paddling nowhere with him fast.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>This man was strictly for the cameras. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">As Cowen drives me home, he makes small talk about plans for the
agency.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>That’s when I tell him that he’s
plans shouldn’t include me.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Mr. Riley, I’m going home.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“I know.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>That’s where I’m
taking you.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“No.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I mean I’m actually
going home tomorrow; my home in New York.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“New York?”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Yes.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I’m sorry I didn’t
say something sooner, but I never planned on staying at the agency.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I actually only took the job for Mom.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>She said she needed to work, but she didn’t
have enough skills at the time, so she heard that Mr. Peters’ was hiring. . .
.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“So that explains.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Explains what?”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">He looks over at me and smiles.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>“Why you’re such a wonderful girl.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Everyone lately talks in codes.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>I stare at him waiting for more of an explanation, but he turns back to
road, still smiling.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Gradually his smile fades and he says, “You know.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I think I’m really going to miss you.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Now it’s my turn to smile, because I know he will.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">After reaching the corner of the block, I ask, “Mr. Riley.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Would you mind just dropping me off
here?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I’d rather walk the rest of the
way.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“No.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Not at all.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>But you’re okay?”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Oh, yes.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Yes, I’m
fine.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I just don’t want to . . . you
know.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“I understand,” he says, reaching over me to open the door,
letting me out.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>“So when will you
leave?”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Tonight.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Tonight?”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Yes, tonight.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Well, how about dropping me an e-mail telling me how everything’s
going?”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Okay.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“So this isn’t really good-bye, then; it’s until later.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Until later.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">As I walk down the long block, leaving Cowen, my thoughts turn to
Seneca.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Somehow, the street-lights along
the walk remind me of his last one in the reverse order so long ago. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>In the dusk, I wonder if he had any regrets,
surprised with the since of lost I feel.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">I can’t tell from this distance if that’s Mom’s car parked in
front of the house.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>But after walking
midway the block I see that it’s a neighbors.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>And I’m thankful.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>After entering
the house, I sit down on my bed trying to find the energy to pack, debating if
there was anything I really wanted to take back with me.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Barely able to keep my eyes open I lay across
the down comforter for just a second.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">*<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Sometimes I sit directly in front of him wanting his full
attention.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Other times watching him play
here every night for a week, usually sitting at the same small intimate table
near the front, but off to the side, close to the wall in the shadows.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>From that vantage point, I was far enough
back to be hidden by the club’s dim interiors, yet close enough to observe
him.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">I would watch his bronze sculptured profile bowed in concentration
over the piano keys and the slight angle of his broad shoulders, hunched as he
played, wearing a dark sports jacket that was obviously cut to give his arms
room to maneuver.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The jacket accentuated
a narrow waist and hips when he stood up and buttoned it, before taking a bow
and throwing his shoulder-length wavy hair magnificently back.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">A very handsome distinguished looking man, an older version of the
picture I carried of him on a gold chain, in an ornate circular miniature
frame; hanging around my neck.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Seneca Duprey.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">I was fortunate that a friend of mine, who also plays jazz piano,
loves Seneca’s work and is a fan.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>That’s
how I was able to find him.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>My friend
also had a contact in the band who lets him know of Seneca’s future gigs around
the city—before it reaches the newspapers—so that he can arrange his affairs to
be free those nights.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Because of that
advance information, I was able to arrange my own affairs to be here, early,
before the masses of jazz lovers arrived.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>My friend is probably here in the crowd—quite close to the stage
himself, but I needed to come, alone.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Madame knew I would find him, had prepared for the moment.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>She’ll be very happy with me.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I’d promised to locate him, and though in the
beginning I didn’t want to, I’m glad she made me.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It was actually something I wanted since I
was a child, but had given up the idea of it ever happening.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I convinced myself that it wasn’t important,
but after seeing and watching him perform, I realize that I had never really
forsaken the dream.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I had only buried
it for a while.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Would you like another Long Island Iced Tea?” asks a waitress
already bearing a tray full of empty glasses and interrupting my reflections.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>She skillfully navigated her way through the
tables to me, because they were so closely situated—because of the crowds.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Yes, please,” I answer.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“That’s a beautiful little picture frame.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Is that your boyfriend in the picture?” the
waitress continues before she leaves.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">My hand instantly goes to the frame.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I must have inadvertently taken it out from
under my mock turtleneck during the performance.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>“No,” I respond, but someone special,
thankful that the picture was too small for her to see it distinctly.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">The chain does catch your eye against the black dress.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I have to be more careful of that.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">How
often do I unconsciously take it out?</i><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>I wonder.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">After all these years, I find myself wondering how our meeting
would go.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I know how I imagined our reuniting
would be.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I would find him.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>How?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>I didn’t know, but he would take one look at me and instantly know me.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Even though a man, he would show deep emotion
against his will, his eyes welling up with tears.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>He would then grab me up into his arms, hugging
and kissing me, expressing his sorrow for all the years of separation—all the
time telling me how much he missed me and insisting that he loved me despite
what his years of absence portrayed.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>He
would then promise that we would never separate again.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The scenario was a childhood one.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>He was my father.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Now, as an adult, I didn’t know how the
script would be played, but I would love the live recreation of my childhood
dream.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">While I wait for my drink, I focus on him.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">To feel as he does—shown in his playing ability—is how I feel
about life in general, to that strong degree.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>The joy and happiness you feel through your accomplishments, is
experienced to the utmost degree, a natural high.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Unfortunately, your pain is felt the same.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">The waitress brought back my drink.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I sip it while the band performs their
finale. The song is a popular one that continues to motivate the crowds.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>While they clap their hands and tap on the
tabletops during the set, I try to steel my nerves for what lies ahead.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Startled, I glance around in the complete darkness of the room,
trying to gather my bearings.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Finally, I
realize that the clapping is a branch hitting persistently against the small
window behind my bed.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Carried on the wind shaking the panes I hear voices.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">Near?</i>
<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Then footsteps.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Kneeling, I peek out onto the front lawn just
as a slim figure of a man wearing a dark overcoat gets into the back seat of a
yellow cab.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">A quick look at the clock on the side table says only nine o’clock
p.m.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Looking out of the window again,
Mom is now standing on the sidewalk in the outfit she had on earlier, staring
after the cab.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>As if my stare draws her,
she glances up at me, but I duck back not knowing why I did.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Then I remember.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>She stood staring then too.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Was it he?<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">My heart races like the answer is “yes.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Did he come and Mom sent him away
again?</span></i><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;"> I wondered, lying back down, listening to the front door
shutting.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoBodyTextIndent" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">But I knew it couldn’t be, because after that night he would never
look for me.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">I pull the edge of the covers back over me, sliding down to dream
another ending to this unpleasant saga.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>A pleasant one, imagining that he <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">was</i>
that man.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
Lucretia McCloudhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07064997700656978645noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3766019299562717358.post-23475168453345563552015-06-09T07:39:00.002-07:002015-06-09T08:01:27.609-07:00Chapter Forty-Two...Is She On To Me?<br />
<h1 style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in 49.5pt; text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;"><span style="font-size: small;">Chapter Forty-Two<o:p></o:p></span></span></h1>
<div>
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;"><span style="font-size: small;"><br /></span></span></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhKuJEN0ZgCx7Uq4qE08lRyIIsgiLKZRduzjU7-WzIuVE5VhngoU95OEg3-mjYKmI7nvzx3OFPFAYdj98awDslqxtYb_xdWZ3mgWAHz0Ftnb2CISHFU3ZPDc_TJrMtwlN2jw4_SQlilxVXR/s1600/c40d7a7060fb74926c257db982b6ddaf.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="239" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhKuJEN0ZgCx7Uq4qE08lRyIIsgiLKZRduzjU7-WzIuVE5VhngoU95OEg3-mjYKmI7nvzx3OFPFAYdj98awDslqxtYb_xdWZ3mgWAHz0Ftnb2CISHFU3ZPDc_TJrMtwlN2jw4_SQlilxVXR/s320/c40d7a7060fb74926c257db982b6ddaf.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<br />
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">For a while a haze of anger kept my head in a fog as I drove,
until the solo artist on the car stereo—a new jazz saxophonist—put some spirit
back into me allowing me to find rhythm and beauty in the constant flow and ebb
of traffic moving to his groove.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I’m
grateful that an overcast day and my confrontation with Vie couldn’t squelch my
spirits, as I think about Cowen on my way to the agency—since I’m meeting him
there.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">So the twenty minutes flies and I’m happy and excited when I pull
up behind a navy blue Acura—someone else with Mom’s good taste.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Checking my face in the rearview mirror, I reapply my lipstick
when I look again at the license number before me.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">That’s Mom’s car. . . What’s it
doing here?<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">And parked in front of it is, <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">Cowen’s
black Benz? He’s here too?</i><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Did Mom decide to check on the
position without discussing it with me first?<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">She was interested in it again, I remember walking up the walk, <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">but shouldn’t she have said something?<o:p></o:p></i></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Discomforted because of being here, I think again, <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">yes, why didn’t she tell me she was coming?<o:p></o:p></i></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Actually the question I ask is, <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">how am I going to explain myself?</i> irritated. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoBodyTextIndent3" style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<em><span style="font-family: Calibri Light;">But she did send some food to the funeral; maybe
she’s just checking on that and I could be doing the same.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>That should work.<o:p></o:p></span></em></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Satisfied, I walk to the agency’s front window, beginning to feel
a little anxious.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Shouldn’t the agency be well lit
if they’re both there?<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Unexpectedly, weight like a wet bear overwhelms me.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">What’s the matter with me?<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Like always, I forgot to close the blinds when I left last
night.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Feeling anxious I think, <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">this is stupid</i>—peeking in; but I can’t
help myself; something’s not right.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoBodyTextIndent" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Suddenly my knees buckle, but I lock them in time, wiping my
sweaty palms against my slacks as my breathing stabs like exploding plate
glass.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It’s shards along with my teeth seem
to puncture my lungs, leaving me gasping, my hand now at my throat, the other
over my mouth, while Mom freely sucks the air from Cowen’s lungs; gripping him
as if life itself were dispensed from inside him.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Anyone able to tear him from her hold would
be a superhero.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">From deep inside me horrible whimpering noises escape, growing
louder and louder, now a piercing scream numbing my brain.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Fortunately my back finds support against the
car—<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">I backed away?</i><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Feeling my way around it, I hurry to yank
open the door before animal rights arrives searching for the pained creature
obviously being skinned alive.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Sliding
into the driver’s seat, I turn on the ignition and the radio seems to blare as
I pill away from the curb into traffic to the runs of a jazz pianist reliving
the passion they displayed, the same passion displayed as he played.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoBodyTextIndent" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">And he played for me.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">I watched his long lean fingers, with great dexterity, speed and skill,
strike the keys, but with an underlying greater intensity.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>In amazement, I watch his fingers fly over
the keys, striking them without one sour note, staccato and lively, coming in
right on cue, causing chills to run through me.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>When time comes for him to fade away and allow the saxophonist, or
guitarist to take center stage, he does it smoothly, beautifully, while I long
for him to play again.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Whereas, other nights he played as part of the band, tonight he is
more passionate.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Tonight, you would think
he desired to exorcise some demon, while carrying the crowds and my emotions to
a level, rarely experienced.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The band
members even glance occasionally at him, smiling their approval.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">I drove to the memory of his fingers flying over the keyboard,
wondering about their intensity; feeling my own intensity on foot on the
accelerator flying over the pavement now in control.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">He was amazing.<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Cowen was amazing.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Is amazing.<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Suddenly the wail of a siren breaks my speed and spirits.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Being forced over the officer approaches the
car motioning for me to roll down the window.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoBodyTextIndent" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Young lady, do you have a death wish?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Do you have any idea how fast you were
traveling?” he asks bending to peer into the car.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“No sir.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I’m sorry.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">One look at my face had him tearing up the ticket, leaving me with
the admonition, “Why don’t you try talking with someone?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>And slow down or you won’t have the
opportunity.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Oh, thank-you officer.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>And
I will; I’ll find someone to talk to.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Thanks again.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">He continues to sit while I try to pull myself together, so I
decide to get off at the next exit, which just happens to near Vie’s hang-out—a
karaoke joint—one of Vie’s midnight retreats, during the day your average bar.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Pulling in the graveled parking lot, still saddened, I think, <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">did he even notice me?</i><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Dumbfounded, I think; <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">this
doesn’t make sense.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>When did this
happen—them getting together?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>How could
it happen?</i><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Why didn’t I see it?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Why did I have to see it now?<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">In one moment, all vestiges of happiness scatter on the wind
rushing pass me through the open car window.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Love, trust, what were these?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Bubble words.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Venetian glass
emotions ready to pop with little to no pressure.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Again I’m shown how fragile fidelity really
is.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Then with whom do I entrust it if
not family?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">In the lot, the questions, when, how, and why? launch my mind into
pandemonium.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I hang onto the steering
wheel, my forehead throbbing against the rubber; while the shock, hurt and
anger wrestle for power, my body performing a series of uncontrollable
shakes.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Eventually shock leaves, anger filling its shoes.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoBodyTextIndent3" style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri Light;"><em>Why should I be crushed?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I had just as much right to him as she had,
even more so.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Hadn’t she been married
twice already?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></em><span style="font-style: normal;">What happened to “its Diamond’s turn for love?”<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Maybe here among Mom’s
reappearing friends—Bloody Mary, Martini, and Margarita—I can figure this out,
and what I should do about</span></i><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">—Tap!<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Tap!<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Tap!<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">What?<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Twisting to see, <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">who?</i> I
silently scream at the grizzly face almost plastered against my window, as pain
shoots through my shoulder blades and behind my eyes.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>In embarrassment I think I recognize Bill’s
face—the manager, as the source of the tapping; remembering him from the night
I dropped Vie off.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Since he stood
outside when we drove up, she introduced us before she went inside.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>“Hey! <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>You okay in there?”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Is it you Bill?” <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Yeah.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Do I know you?”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Yes.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I’m Diamond, friend
of Vie’s.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I’m sorry to bother you.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I guess I just fell asleep.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I’ve been terribly tired.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>You don’t have to worry,” I say rolling down
the window.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“But you don’t look so good,” this burly bearded man says with the
most unexpected tenderness.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>“Why don’t
you come inside?”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Oh, I don’t know Bill.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>I’ll be okay.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“You sure?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Anybody you want
to call?”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“No.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Nobody. . . You know
Bill, . . . maybe I will come in.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Just give
me a minute, okay?”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Sure.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Take your time.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
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</div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">With that he went through the heavy dark oak doors, a large boar’s
head welcoming patrons.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">After a minute I follow him in.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Inside the dingy interiors, over the loud music I hear, “Hey,
Diamond.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Come on back.”<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>He beckons with his thick hairy arm—the white
tee shirt appearing to cut his circulation right above bulging biceps, looking
more Bill the bouncer, than Bill the owner.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Here.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I cleared away this
booth for you.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>You can seat yourself
here awhile if you like.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I’ve got some
things to take care of before the wild crowd comes. . . Not unless you want to
talk,” he says winking.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Smiling at his bearded weather-beaten face I say, “Thanks,
Bill.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I’m okay.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>But I do appreciate your offer.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Is it possible to get a coffee, though?”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Sure.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Coming right up. . .
Jake! . . . A coffee for the missus.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“On its’ way,” came the response from behind the swinging door
separating the kitchen.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">I’m amazed at how you can find comfort from the most unlikely
sources.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">I sit for what seems like hours in a brainless stupor, with head
in hand.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>After a while in the darkness,
listening to Bill’s jukebox, songs about lost love, despair, but mainly about
family reminded me of my why I’m here in Chicago.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I came to mend broken ties, not to pursue new
ones.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Finally I decide to try and put
away my feelings for Cowen, to bow out gracefully, though I am disappointed
with Mom.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">For a few more minutes I allow myself to mourn
what-could-have-been, feeling the martyr.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Just before the evening rush, I look up from my umpteenth cup of
coffee, to a pair of dark pants standing beside me.<o:p></o:p></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;"><br /></span>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEikyjkfA3XuQNXJG_30SktCifKHakkgYk_RWHQYBwr7knLpcZNjycTK8CiuLmmfb2K9GKPSTffi2TJw2pUdYjPQw0KeAfTo219wue6QsOvN2RBfhBX_881RpHIYW21dHevtO1Nu7rbATVoO/s1600/9ff43100dd64081bae42ae25a12e660a.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEikyjkfA3XuQNXJG_30SktCifKHakkgYk_RWHQYBwr7knLpcZNjycTK8CiuLmmfb2K9GKPSTffi2TJw2pUdYjPQw0KeAfTo219wue6QsOvN2RBfhBX_881RpHIYW21dHevtO1Nu7rbATVoO/s320/9ff43100dd64081bae42ae25a12e660a.jpg" width="213" /></a></div>
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;"><br /></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Cowen! . . . What are you doing here?” my heart betraying me by
racing. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“I wanted to make sure you’re alright,” he says.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Make sure I’m all right? . . . He
saw me?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“I’ve been looking for you,” he says, taking a seat across from me
in the booth, a semi-wonderful vision.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">How I wanted to dislike him, but
how could I when he came for me?<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“How did you know I was here?” I ask, taking in his handsome
appearance in a black turtleneck sweater under his black leather coat.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Well, in the insurance business you make friends everywhere,” he
says motioning for a cup.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>“I wrote up a
policy for a police officer that drives this section of town.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I gave him the plate number for your rental
car and asked him to look out for it, then give me a call when he found
you.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>How’s that for detective work?” he
asks grinning a beautiful grin.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">I look down at my cup to make sure that I’m drinking coffee, not
hallucinating, “Yes.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>How’s that,” I
repeat quietly.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">I look up and in his face I see concern personified, but decide; <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">I’m still angry.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Why didn’t he say something? . . . He didn’t
know she was my mother? . . . I drove her car.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>What about your detective work there?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span><o:p></o:p></i></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Now I’m not even sure I want him to sit across from me; yet . . . I
don’t want him to leave either.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">He shouldn’t say anything to me; at the same time he should say
something, anything to convince me that I didn’t see what I saw.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">This isn’t what Vie meant, is
it?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Diamond, I’m sorry,” he begins—me all ears, eager and
anxious.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>“I’ve really been meaning to
talk to you before now.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoBodyTextIndent3" style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<em><span style="font-family: Calibri Light;">Oh no.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>This
doesn’t sound like a confession.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></em></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in right 6.5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">I wait, my hands now underneath the wood
table, nails pressed into my palms.<span style="mso-tab-count: 1;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">This doesn’t sound like the
beginnings of a declaration.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>He’s not
going to denounce this attraction that I’ve been feeling these past weeks?</span></i><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">—an
attraction I felt was mutual.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">But it doesn’t matter now, right,
Diamond?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>You’ve decided to bow out</span></i><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Cowen continues, “Diamond.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>I don’t know how to say this.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Just say it. . . No, don’t say
it,</span></i><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;"> I plead
inside.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoBodyTextIndent" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">If it’s not good news, maybe he should just say it, quick, like
extracting a bad tooth.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>He’s causing me
pain—like that dentist.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>But when it
finished I felt better . . . didn’t I?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Diamond.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>You’re a very
beautiful girl.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Wherever you go I’m sure
you attract a lot of attention.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Sometimes, I find myself distracted when working around you.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Really?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Sometimes, you do?<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">As if reading my expression, he smiles.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>“Yes, sometimes, because other times I have
other things on my mind.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">I rest my hands on the table before me, willing him to pick them
up, place them against his face, but knowing he won’t.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Diamond . . . look at me.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">I do.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I obey.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Willingly.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">In the dim light, with his head at a slight angle he catches my
breath.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Seneca</span></i><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">No</span></i><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;"> . . . It’s
okay, Diamond.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It’s Cowen.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">The chiseled features belong to a kind, sincere man.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>A man saying, “Diamond, you’re wonderful and
so is your personality.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>You add so much
life to the agency. . . Do you have any idea how much you’re missed when you’re
not there?”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">I numbly shake my head.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Well you are.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>A great
deal. . . But I been noticing something and . . . stop me if I’m wrong.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Noticing something?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“I get the impression that maybe you’re a little attracted to me,”
he says delicately.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Oh my god! . . . Is he going to
really put this off on me?<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Looking intently at him, I try to decipher his tone—<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">maybe he’s kidding</i>.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">But his words? . . . Did he
actually want me to say, “yes” before he admits to anything?<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">He waits.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Oh no!<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>He does.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>He wants me to admit to it</span></i><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">But I can’t; I don’t; I stay silent, horrified, thinking; <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">this isn’t happening!</i><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">I want to scream, “yes I’m attracted to you, aren’t you to me?”
because I know he is.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">If not, <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">why are you doing
this to me?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Why do you want me to say so
if you’re not?</i><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">I want to shout; “It’s not fair,” but again I don’t say anything,
my fingers now digging into my thighs.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Glancing towards the front door, I want to brush back my curls
with dignity and walk straight out of here; but I don’t.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoBodyTextIndent" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Diamond.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I’m sorry,” he
hurries on.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>“Obviously I’ve made a
mistake. . . I’m really embarrassed. . . And if I’ve embarrassed you, that
wasn’t my intention.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">My eyes begin to water.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Diamond, don’t.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">I don’t believe him, <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">wasn’t
this his intention?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Then why?</i><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“No. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>No, it’s okay, Mr.
Riley. . . I think I’m coming down with a cold.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Lame; <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">but what could I say?</i><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I am embarrassed, sitting here thinking about
how noble I’ll be. . . No.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>No, I won’t
let him come between Mom and me.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">And what do I find out?</i><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>That the attraction was one-sided anyway.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">What a fool</span></i><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Cowen came to reject me, </span></i><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">sure, to
reject me gently, but it’s rejection any way you spell it.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">No I’m not embarrassed; I’m
humiliated, devastated.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>But I’m not going
to tell him that</span></i><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Instead I try smiling, joking a little, “Yes, Mr. Riley.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>You’re very attractive and all, but I
couldn’t . . . You know. . . You being so old and all.”<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Liar.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Like that matters.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Why should I even care about sparing him?<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
<br />
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Cowen smiles a beautiful smile that lifts all signs of worry from
his face; relieved.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>“I’m flattered.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>For you to find me attractive at all is a
major notch in my old belt.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">He’s trying, and it does lighten the tension, but my shame
remains.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Mr. Riley, I’m sorry you felt it necessary to talk to me.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Really I am.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>But don’t worry, you won’t have to again.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“You don’t have anything to be sorry for.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Actually, under different circumstances I
would probably be more than flattered, but as it stands. . . Give things a
little time, Diamond.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Who knows?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>If you’re not swept up in a few years you may
want to remember me,” he says patting my hand.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“And you won’t be swept up?” I ask.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">I meant Mom.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">What was that all about?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>But I couldn’t actually ask about her now,
could I?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">But he’s saying, “I’m pretty sure I won’t be.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Trust me.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">He stands up and looks as if he wants to kiss me on the
cheek.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Then he thinks better of it and
pats my shoulder.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">What did Mom do to deserve a kiss?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
<br />
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Suddenly his motion of just walking away is too much to bear,
causing me shortness of breathe, giving me the shakes.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
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<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Seneca wait!</span></i><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;"> almost
rolls off my lips.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">But Cowen turns around and asks, “Are you coming?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I’ll follow you to the rental agency.”<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Overjoyed, despite my humiliation, I grab my purse.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Despite his rejection he gains greater height
in my eyes.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">As I walk beside him he leans over and whispers, “They’re going to
raid this place tonight.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Think we should
warn Vie?”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">My mouth falls open.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Why?”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Why indeed?” Cowen repeats laughing.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
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<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">How gullible am I?</span></i><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;"> I wonder,
just now taking in the pole center-stage, also imagining what other things may
take place here to merit a raid.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
Lucretia McCloudhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07064997700656978645noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3766019299562717358.post-91485556436485505082015-06-09T07:32:00.001-07:002015-06-09T07:32:44.629-07:00Chapter Forty-One...Is She On To Me?<br />
<h1 style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;"><span style="font-size: small;">Chapter
Forty-One</span></span></h1>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Diamond.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Telephone,” Mom
calls from the bottom of the stairs.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">For me?</span></i><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;"> thinking, <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">I heard it ring minutes ago</i>.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Okay Mom . . . I’m coming!” I yell back grabbing a robe, skipping
the stairs two-at-a-time down to the kitchen; again thinking, <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">we’ve got to get an upstairs phone</i>.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Picking up the receiver from the kitchen table, I recognize, Vie.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Why didn’t you call me on my phone?”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“I forgot the number.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Why was I upset?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It couldn’t have been Cowen anyway.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Wouldn’t he call my cell phone if it were he?</span></i><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I gave it to him at the funeral.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Anyway, Diamond, what’s this?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>We keep secrets now?”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Sure, Vie.”—here we go.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>“So, which secret do you want to discuss?”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“The one about you and Cowen Riley.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">This touches a funny bone.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>“Me and Cowen Riley.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>When did
this happen?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>You know something I
don’t?” rather flattered by the coupling.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“About you chasing Cowen Riley.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Chasing him? . . . Me? . . . No Vie.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>That would be Jackie’s arena.”<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">Or even
yours, I might add.<o:p></o:p></i></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoBodyTextIndent" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Oh . . . of course, Ms. beautiful Diamond Dupree doesn’t have to
chase anyone, right? . . . So he’s already yours? . . . So soon after wifey
dies?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Wow, girlfriend, you’re
good.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>What do they say, ‘not even a
chance for the dirt to settle?’”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Vie. . . Tell me this isn’t why you called. . . Not with this
garbage?”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“No, actually.”<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Her
smugness conveyed through the wire.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>“I’m
calling to give you a warning.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>You know
I like a little drama—<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">a little?</i><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>And lately you seem to be smack in the middle
of a juicy one.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">There’s always drama when Vie’s around.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">What’s
different?</i><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>“I know you can’t be
talking about Jackie; I already know about her.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>And there isn’t any other drama to talk about.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Really?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Well, you’re going
to meet Cowen for brunch, right?”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">How does she know about that?<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
<br />
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Yeah; well; so?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>We can’t
eat together.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>If you must know, he needs
to talk with me about something, probably work. . . But what do you care?”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">And why am I explaining myself to
her?<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
<br />
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Care, Diamond?” she says in a totally controlled tone.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>“You confuse me with someone else.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I don’t care.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>That used to be you.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>But
remember, Diamond, I said I had a warning for you.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Believe it or not I actually kinda like you;
so listen up.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Maybe you should give Cowen some space,” she says.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>“He’s got issues he need to clear up.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Why do you think you know his business?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Where do you get your information?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>From Jackie?”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Actually, my source is perfect, but it is mine.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I’m just giving you some advice.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>He’s not ready and neither are you, so just
leave him along.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Go back to whatever you
do in New York, then contact him later.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Actually, he’s too old for you.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>You don’t want to work forever in an insurance agency, do you?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>You get with him and that’s all you’ll
do.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>So take my advice and go home.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Well I’ve got advice for her too,
get a life, but you hear me voicing it?</span></i></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
</div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Before she says anything else on the subject, I say, “I’ll think
about your advice, Vie.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Thanks,” <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">for whatever,</i> I conclude hanging up.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoBodyTextIndent" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Puzzled, I stand with the receiver in my hand.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Right before hanging up she said, “And your
hold may be slippery than you think.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>You’d better keep your eyes open.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">What was that all about?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span></i><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Darn it.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The kitchen clock shows I’m late.<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><o:p></o:p></i></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">I hurry back upstairs, excited—ignoring her cryptic message—and
through a shower, slipping on a simple pair of wool jersey slacks and a white
silk blouse, so as not to appear frantic, since this is all very casual.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Later, Cowen said he’d follow me to the
airport to drop off the rental car, then drop me back home.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Thinking ahead I anticipate a couple of good
strong hours with him alone.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Especially since after the funeral Cowen couldn’t break away to
talk to me like he requested.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>But it was
okay.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I didn’t really think that a house
full of mourners the right place for intimate conversation, especially since
they were there for him—former workmates and clients crowded his home, showing
of his popularity.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I sat there on the
sofa proud to know him.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I wondered after
again visualizing the room, <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">which, if
any, was the one Vie warmed me about</i>.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Funny, I did remember overhearing Vie telling Jackie about someone
who kept calling his private line.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Jackie thought the woman irritated him.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Jackie even heard the words “restraining order.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Poor Cowen</span></i><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">But
what did I expect; a man that handsome would have admirers.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>A lot of them; even crazy ones.</i><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Though, why should I believe Vie,
and what was Jackie doing answering his private line?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">And if at all possible I need Vie
to keep out of my business,</span></i><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;"> because maybe something is brewing between
Cowen and me.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">What of it?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>He could do
worst.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>And it’s not as if I planned
it.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Before I knew about his wife’s
illness I actually planned on leaving.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>And I actually do feel bad about her death.</i></span><br />
</div>
<br />
<div class="MsoBodyTextIndent3" style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<em><span style="font-family: Calibri Light;">But I can’t think about her now; I want to hear
what Cowen has to say with a clear conscious.<o:p></o:p></span></em></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">After I finish dressing I call for Mom; but she isn’t around.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I tried to remember what she had on, because
then I’d know where she was headed.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Then
I remembered I didn’t see her this morning.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Whatever she wore would be nice though.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Lately she has gone back to dressing up.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>She takes care of her appearance.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Whenever together, no one ever thought her my mother—always a
sister.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">I guess Steve’s death gave her more determination than ever to
stay healthy; so she really keeps her weight down.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The only thing I worry about is her
drinking.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>That’s why if Cowen and I do
get together it’ll be nice staying close to keep an eye on her.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Before I leave, Vie is at my door, arms spread out against both
sides of the doorframe.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>She didn’t even
give herself time to apply her makeup.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">What is this?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Blocking my exit she says, “Wait a minute!<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I just wanna look. . . Nice.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Not overdone.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Very Classy.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>You dress like the
same old Diamond, but two months and you’re keeping secrets and sneaking off.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The Diamond we all knew and loved would never
do that; take advantage of a weak man?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Never.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Or maybe we didn’t really
know her.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Hum. . . So,” she says with a
grin, “I just wanted to see what this new woman on the prowl looks like.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I guess the same.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">I stand seething calmly.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Take advantage of a weak man?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>No Vie.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>That would be you.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">She continues to grin casual against the door-jam.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>“Maybe; maybe not.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>But this isn’t about me, is it?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It’s about you Diamond . . . about how you’ve
changed.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>What about those little principles
of yours?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I thought I saw some when you
came.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoBodyTextIndent3" style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<em><span style="font-family: Calibri Light;">I’ve had it.<o:p></o:p></span></em></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Honestly, Vie!<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Spit it
out.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>What are you talking about?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>What principles am I ignoring?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>You’re not interested in him, are you?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Is this what this conversation is really
about?”<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">This is actually a strange thought.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Vie and I interested in the same man. . . Is
that possible? She isn’t is she. . . Not an insurance agent?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoBodyTextIndent3" style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<em><span style="font-family: Calibri Light;">I knew she played with him, but that’s all.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I need to know.<o:p></o:p></span></em></div>
<br />
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Vie. . . Are you interested in Cowen?”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">She gazes down at herself running her hands down the front of her
jeans.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>“Wouldn’t you like to know,” she
says glancing up at me beneath her lashes.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">It strikes me that a comparison is being made, but I just say,
“Yes, I would; yes I would like to know.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Are you?”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Not for marriage, if you get my drift,” she finishes, the tips of
her fingers squeezed into her front pockets hunching her shoulders.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">It figures</span></i><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“So what is it?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Why can’t I
be interested in him?”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Because he’s not your type.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>He’s insurance.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>You’re
designer.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>He wants a wife at home.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>You’re a career woman.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>You want more?” says this woman of wisdom.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Well thank you for your observations, but why don’t you just let
me and Cowen work it out, okay?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Be happy
for me.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Be happy for you?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Is there
something to be happy about?”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Yes,” I want to shout. . . <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">He’s
interested in me.</i><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Shaking my head I say, “Vie.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>If you’ll excuse me I’ve got to go.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">With a large sweep of the arm she lets her arm drop with a
flourish, letting me pass like, “Godspeed.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">And I do.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I slip past her
and down the front steps, furious.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Why was she grinning like that?<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
<br />
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">It actually sent chills along my back.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">I think; <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">what did I
expect?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I wouldn’t want to be interested
in the same guy she’s interested in.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>But
did she care?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>No.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>So why should I?</i><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Honestly.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>All this fuss about a brunch date</span></i><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Suddenly it’s funny; I giggle as I pull away from the curb
catching a glimpse of Vie on the sidewalk under the oak staring after me.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
Lucretia McCloudhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07064997700656978645noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3766019299562717358.post-22733367998524283692015-06-09T07:28:00.000-07:002015-09-21T04:46:17.839-07:00Chapter Forty...Is She On To Me?<br />
<h1 style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;"><span style="font-size: small;">Chapter Forty</span></span></h1>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;"><o:p></o:p></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">An azure blue-sky proclaims; “You can’t blame me for your delay,”
though, for Mrs. Riley’s sake I’m glad the weather is beautiful.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">But it was cowardly,</span></i><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;"> I thought
as I followed the procession from the funeral parlor to the gravesite, then,
parked on a hill, instead of joining the gathering of friends.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">This is sad.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I should join Cowen and the others.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Lend my support down there.</span></i><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>But I continue to overlook the proceedings
from the hill.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">What would Cowen think?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>If he sees me, how would I explain
myself?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">To ensure that he won’t, I stand hidden by the trees.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>From my position, I observe every one as
they, for a moment, bow their heads in silence for the deceased, while I kick
myself for my actions.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">At least I did pay my respects at
the funeral parlor,</span></i><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;"> I console myself, even if I couldn’t, at
this time, bring myself to her gravesite.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">But consolation is short-lived, when I view Cowen standing as part
of the group, but alone.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>With no one’s
arm linked through his the realization comes forcibly back to me that Mrs.
Riley had neither grandparents nor parents or siblings to mourn her.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>There’s just Cowen.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Come to think of it, the obituary did make
mention of that fact.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">I wish I’d gotten the chance to
get to know her</span></i><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Another thought comes to mind as I continue to stand; one that I
had subconsciously suppressed.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Truth be
told, I delay because of guilt.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">Stupid me went off and got attracted to Mrs.
Riley’s husband and I have the audacity to show up at her funeral in mourning</i>.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">But why should I feel like a hypocrite, when Jackie blatantly pursued
him, before and after she knew of Mrs. Riley’s illness?</i><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I ask myself.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
</div>
<br />
<div class="MsoBodyTextIndent" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">But I know that what Jackie did or did not do doesn’t really
concern me.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>My conscious bothers me.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">They’re leaving?</span></i><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;"> I wonder as
my workmates disperse to their cars.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Also, the funeral director and his limousine are preparing to
leave.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Mr. Peters wasn’t able to attend
since he had already moved to Arizona, but at the parlor I noticed he and his
wife had sent flowers.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>And Vie was in
the middle of the one of her many crises; otherwise, she would have attended.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">With everyone drifting off to the cars, Cowen now stands at Mrs.
Riley’s gravesite, alone.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>So, I descent
the hill.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>As I walk down to him, my
knees quivering, I become afraid of rolling down the hill to his feet.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I see me sliding, my heels digging up lumps
of grass, my dress riding up my legs as I attempt keep it down, landing
grass-strained decorated at Cowen’s feet.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">That would be a sight.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Another segment of embarrassing moments with
Cowen.<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">I stop, worrying; <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">maybe I
should turn around and leave?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Did he
request from the others to be left alone with her?<o:p></o:p></i></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">If he did, I wanted to honor that; so I decide it would probably
be better to meet him with the others at his home—if that was where they were headed.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoBodyTextIndent" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Before I could turn around, he calls out, “Diamond?”<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Stunned, as he saw me as I turned around.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">At first it looked as if he’d seen a ghost, but now he recognizes
me.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">We meet half-way—he walking uphill, me down.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I see his eyes filled with unshed tears and
wish that somehow I could hurry his grieving period; but verbal condolences
alone seem inadequate, so I embrace him.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>His response is unexpected.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>His
arms encircle me, but slowly with caution.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Cowen seems wary.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“I’m really sorry, Cowen.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I
know this has to be hard for you,” I say into his shoulder, hoping to lower his
guard.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">I think, <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">maybe he’s
uncomfortable with me being here.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Maybe
this is too soon, so I back off against my will, to give him time and space</i>.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Cowen, if there is some way to help you ease the pain, please let
me know what it is.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I really want to
help.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>You’ve been so wonderful to me and
everyone else that it’s the least I can do.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">I want to comfort him, but my thoughts were at a lost at what I could
do for him.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>This is because, against my
will, I could only think about how much I wanted to be back in his arms. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Diamond, I didn’t think you were coming.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Thank you for being here,” he said, as he put
his hands on my shoulders.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>“You’re
coming over to the house?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>There’s plenty
of food.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Jackie has prepared quite a
bit.” <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">No one could possibly feel more like a heel than me at that
moment.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I had totally forgotten the food
Mom and I had prepared.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>When Mom had
heard that my employer’s wife had died, she instantly began cooking.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I was so impressed with her generous
spirit.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>She made pasta salad, little
sandwiches and Madame’s famous bread pudding.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>I had also baked a ham, made potato salad and rolls.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I had to go back home and get the food.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Cowen, I don’t know how I could have been so absent-minded, but I
am coming.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It’s just that Mom and I
prepared food also and I forgot it.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I’m
just going to swing home and pick it up.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>It won’t take long.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“But Diamond, I’m sure we have more than enough.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Just come.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>You can bring the food you prepared later.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Plus, I would like to talk to you.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Okay.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>But I’m sure that my
Mom won’t be too happy when she sees that I’ve forgotten the food.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“I’m sure she’ll forgive you. . . Where’s your car?”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Further embarrassed, I answer, “On the hill. . . Don’t ask.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Maybe one day I’ll explain.” <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">He just smiles.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">That’s why I like him so much.</i><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>He just puts you at ease.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Why don’t you get your car and follow me home.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>We’ll talk later.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<br />
<div class="MsoBodyTextIndent" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Instead of allowing me to walk the path up the hill alone, he
accompanies me to the car.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">After reaching the top, he says, looking about, “The scenery is
beautiful from up here.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I would have
enjoyed watching everything from this point too.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Mortified, I nod.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“The navy blue Acura, right?” he says.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Yes.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>How did you know?”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Somehow it just fits,” he says, with a little sadness in his
voice.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">I look at him to see what he means, but he doesn’t say anything
else.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>After I drive him to his car, I
follow him home through tree-lined streets.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Large colonial and Georgian homes set back off of well-manicured lawns
were the surroundings—a nice suburban neighborhood.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">We drove up the side drive to one of those Georgians and Jackie is
in the doorway to greet us.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Her posture
is relaxed, but her eyes are furious, which is incongruent with the soft
classical music floating through the rooms.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>It is a serene background for the polite conversation of the smattering
of guests.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Diamond, your Mom just left.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>She brought the food you forgot,” she says, as she holds the storm door
for me.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>As I pass, I hear her say,
“typical,” under her breath.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Cowen says, “Diamond’s mom was here?” sounding surprised.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">I guess it would be surprising, since we’ve just discussed her and
the food.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Yes,” Jackie answers, continuing, “I told her that I hadn’t seen
you,” nodding her head in my direction, but allowing Cowen to enter.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>“She seemed surprised.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Wondered where you both were, and low and
behold, here you are. . . She said couldn’t stay.”<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>At this point in the conversation I am
dismissed.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“What a minute.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>How did she
get here?”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“She took a taxi. . . Cowen let me take your coat.”<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>She walks him into his home, already assuming
the position of ‘lady of the manor,’ while I find my way around.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>“You must be extremely hungry.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Let me make you a plate,” I hear her say as
her husky voice and Cowen’s drifts away into the kitchen.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Cowen glances back over his shoulder, mouthing the words, “We’ll
talk later.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Talk?<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">About us?<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">I smile my agreement and take the opportunity to mingle, while
looking around the house, trying to get a feel for Mrs. Riley.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>When Cowen and I first entered, I faced a
staircase.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Along the staircase wall were
pictures.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>From where I stand they all
look like pictures of a young brunette—the same one.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">To the right of the staircase was the hallway, then the living
room where one of my fellow co-workers leaned against a white stone mantel,
talking with an elegant older woman, presumably a neighbor, while a cozy fire
burned between them.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>From the looks of
things the fire wasn’t just burning in the fireplace.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I couldn’t blame her; he is an attractive
young man and she looks well off.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Who
knows, maybe a match is being formed.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">On a striking black and white striped sofa, sits my other
co-worker with a plate balanced on his lap.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>He sits next to a portly older man who is incessantly talking.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Their drinks are placed on a glass and chrome
table in front of them.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>My co-worker
catches my eye and offers me a seat.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I
wave to him, smiling and say, “Thank-you.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>I’m fine.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I’ll seat down in a
minute.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">My attention is drawn to the large portrait of a woman above the
mantel.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The woman is a brunette with
disconcertingly piercing gray eyes, an extremely becoming young woman.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I guess it’s safe to assume that she’s Mrs.
Riley.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>She’s not quite what I would have
expected.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I don’t know why, but I would
have supposed that she would have been a small woman with a less imposing
demeanor.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Especially since Cowen’s
disposition is so even keeled.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Diamond, you’re being too
critical,</span></i><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;"> I say to myself.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">The artist probably couldn’t capture her
spirit.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>And knowing how expensive
portraits are, I would have displayed mine, too.</i><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<br />
<div class="MsoBodyTextIndent" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Though, the contemporary decorating of the room gives me the
feeling that if she was the main influence in decorating, she was a modern
woman.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>She looks like a career
woman.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I wonder what, if any, was her
career.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Beyond the living room, I see the dining room where all the food
that was brought in was placed.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The
large dining room table was covered in a variety of wonderful smelling dishes
with a crystal chandelier hanging above it.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>I can’t see from where I stand any more of the room, but just beyond the
dining room, in a small alcove was a small library that housed floor-to-ceiling
bookcases.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I could also see a beautiful
mahogany roll-top desk.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>For some reason,
I got the impression that this is Cowen’s spot.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>I would examine it further, later.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">I wished I could go upstairs to get a feel for the rest of the
house, but that seems inappropriate, so I walk down the hallway into the modern
kitchen.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>There, Jackie is standing
intimately at Cowen ’s side, but I disregard this and enter the dining room
from here.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">From this angle, I see more pictures of Mrs. Riley.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I hoped at least that they were Cowen’s
choice to display them.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Otherwise, it
bordered on the excessive.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I could
easily see Jackie just replacing her picture in every spot without a hang-up.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I didn’t think it would happen, I just could
see it.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">While I stand at the table, I look for Mom’s food or mine.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It hasn’t been put out.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I turn around to question Jackie about it,
when she volunteers the answer.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Diamond, we already had so much food that I just kept yours
together for you to take back with you, if you don’t mind?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>We really appreciate you efforts,
though.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Isn’t that right Cowen?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Didn’t you say that you don’t know what you
are going to do with all this food?” she asked him sweetly.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“It’s nice of you to be concerned, Jackie, but there is no way I’m
going to let Diamond take her food back.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>For the next couple of days, I’ll be cared for.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Oh, you don’t have to worry about that at all, Cowen.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I’ll definitely make sure you’re cared for,”
Jackie says.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“You’ve been wonderful Jackie, but you don’t have to worry about
me.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I’ll be alright.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">I never felt intimidated or usurped by Jackie, regarding Cowen.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>He had a way of making me feel at ease.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>That is why I can leave them in the kitchen,
while I make myself a plate to take back to the living room.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Fortunate for me that the guys are here.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">I mingle with them a large percentage of the evening, but it was
getting late.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>So I leave before we could
finish talking. <o:p></o:p></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;"><a href="http://lilluna.com/funeral-potatoes/">http://lilluna.com/funeral-potatoes/</a></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;"><br /></span></div>
Lucretia McCloudhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07064997700656978645noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3766019299562717358.post-55279077675241380792015-06-09T07:17:00.001-07:002015-06-09T07:17:57.662-07:00Chapter Thirty-Nine...Is She On To Me?<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh7bH-DnWW69sqC1who5m5xSwySVnZZ4ZAMVHTDbTyR6mgW8_7e3AK5m3eGBTjN7XeFWbi9q_JpToHjTvyYmUaZNHMJKt5tLgkqno_iSAnCMBCvQwgXJn61i5tESDmsXkNkDdAlgIUqp5tk/s1600/8141265e603172012c17d5689bc8a380.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh7bH-DnWW69sqC1who5m5xSwySVnZZ4ZAMVHTDbTyR6mgW8_7e3AK5m3eGBTjN7XeFWbi9q_JpToHjTvyYmUaZNHMJKt5tLgkqno_iSAnCMBCvQwgXJn61i5tESDmsXkNkDdAlgIUqp5tk/s320/8141265e603172012c17d5689bc8a380.jpg" width="240" /></a></div>
<br />
<h1 style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;"><span style="font-size: small;">Chapter
Thirty-Nine<o:p></o:p></span></span></h1>
<br />
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</div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Scavenging through the refrigerator, I find chicken, olives and a
can of diet ice tea.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Grabbing a couple of
napkins, I head back to the table.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">I hear Vie running up the back porch steps; then she bursts
through the door, panting, “Did you hear the news?”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“No; what news?” I ask, though more intrigued with, <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">why were we added to her gossip drops? <o:p></o:p></i></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Mom looks only mildly curious, still slowly turning the pages of a
new boutique catalog.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Mrs. Riley killed herself?”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“What!” I shout turning towards Mom’s, “Diamond!” as she wipes
soda from her pages.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Soda? Is that all she can think
about when someone dies?</span></i><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;"> I wonder spinning back to Vie.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Vie, are you talking about Cowen’s wife?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>That Mrs. Riley?”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“One and the same.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Oh no; what happened?<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Oh, that’s horrible news,” Mom says glancing up, but still
thumbing through the pages, dabbing at wet spots with her napkin.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>“What happened?”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">*<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>“Man, Mom.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I can’t believe it; she committed
suicide.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>She took her own life?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Vie told Jackie that she was depressed and
all, but I didn’t think it was that bad; not that I knew anything about her,
really.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>That makes me feel worst.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It was like she didn’t exist; now she
actually doesn’t.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>He must feel
awful.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I know he does.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I would.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Well, it wasn’t like you had a lot of opportunities to talk to him
. . . right?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I mean, you mostly did your
work and he was gone a great deal of time?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>There was no time to get too personal, otherwise you would have told
me.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“No we didn’t get the chance to talk a lot, but we did work
together on the decorating project.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I
guess I had an opportunity to ask about her then, but I never even thought
to.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Now she’s dead.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It feels kind of awkward.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I don’t know what to say.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Well death and funerals are awkward.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>But you didn’t know.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I’m sure he doesn’t expect a lot from
you.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Seems to me that he’s been pretty private
about the whole affair anyway.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>You
didn’t know because he didn’t bring it to the office.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Yeah, you’re right.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>If he
wanted me to know, he would have said something.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>But now I wish I’ve had to opportunity to
meet her.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Why?”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“To see what type of woman Mr. Riley would marry.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Why would you want to know that?”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Oh, I don’t know.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Just
curious I guess,” I said dropping my head over my plate.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Shocked with the realization that I wondered
if she were anything like me.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">I’m also shocked that Mom and I are even discussing anything at
this length.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Matter-of-fact, this past
week her mood’s improved.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>She’s begun
playing the piano again, and she’s stopped the constant drinking.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>She’s even cooking again.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>So now I find it somewhat easy to talk to
her.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Plus, I’m pretty sure that night she said she wished I were dead
wasn’t directed at me.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>She was
sleepwalking in her nightmare.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“So when is the funeral?” Mom asks.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Friday,” I say while getting up.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Where are you going, honey?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>I’m enjoying this; I thought we would stay in and talk awhile.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It’s been ages since we’ve just sat around
and enjoyed each other’s company.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">What’s gotta into her</span></i><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“I’m about to run to the mall and pick up something for Mrs.
Riley’s funeral.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I didn’t know that I
would need any attire like that when I was in New York, so I didn’t bring
anything back.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Oh, honey, you don’t have to worry about that.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I have plenty of black dresses, unless you
just want to own your own.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Matter-of-fact, I have something that I know you’ll love.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Hold on a sec.”<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Mom hurries from the kitchen and comes back
with a fabulous simple black knit dress unlike anything I’ve seen.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">She says, “It’s a designer original.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoBodyTextIndent" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Mom, it’s beautiful.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I
can’t … you keep it.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Diamond don’t be foolish.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Actually, you can have it.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It has
a large enough hem so we get it ready for you, okay?”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“If you’re sure.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“I’m sure.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">I fall in love with it, not just because it’s beautiful, but also
because it’s the only dress that I can remember Mom giving me.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Yes, I would like to own my own dress, but I
definitely didn’t mind wearing this one.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>I thought that I would look great in it.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Diamond.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Why don’t you go
and pick up the car and drive it to the funeral?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The dealer finished it a few days ago
now.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>They had been dragging their feet,
but I had them put a rush on it.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>If I
had a man around, they wouldn’t delay the way they do when it’s a single
female.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">She was probably right.<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
<br />
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Sure Mom.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I’ll do that the
first thing tomorrow morning.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
Lucretia McCloudhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07064997700656978645noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3766019299562717358.post-67577397239167442412015-06-09T07:14:00.001-07:002015-06-09T07:14:11.261-07:00Chapter Thirty-Eight...Is She On To Me?<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Chapter Thirty-Eight<o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;"><br /></span></div>
</div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">So that’s what happened</span></i><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">That morning when Vie walked in with me, Cowen immediately called
me into his office.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I knew by the drag
to his face I wouldn’t like his words.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Diamond, would you shut the door behind you?”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Sure, Mr. Riley.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">After hanging up my coat on the coat tree, I took a seat in front
of the mahogany desk, wondering, “What’s wrong?” because Cowen’s face looked
exhausted, his tie loosened—which was definitely abnormal—and he wasn’t
clean-shaven.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>His unusual appearance
gave me the desire to reach across the desk and stroke all the worry lines from
his brow.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Diamond, you’ve been doing a fantastic job with the plans, but
I’m afraid that we’re going to have to put the plans aside for a while.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Do you mind taking back the receptionist desk
for a little while?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I’ve got a lot on my
mind, so I’m in no position to give the plans much thought.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“No.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Of course not, Mr.
Riley.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I don’t mind,” I said, lying,
wondering <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">what’s the problem</i>; but his
head in his hand told me that the discussion was closed.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">I walked around camouflaging dejection for a whole week, wondering
why Cowen took away my job of decorating the agency—<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">my only joy</i>.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoBodyTextIndent" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">If I hadn’t heard Jackie gripping to Vie about answering the phone
and re-filing files I would have thought that what Cowen said was legit, his
own initiation.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Though I found working
daily with him in the office somewhat distracting.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Sometimes, seated in the corner of his
office, I would look up to see him watching me, his eyes warm.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It felt wonderful.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I woke up in a hurry to get to the agency.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>So I thought that maybe he felt that we were
getting to close.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>So it came as a shock
today to hear Vie and Jackie discussing Mr. Riley’s wife.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">They were whispering, like always whispering together, but since I
was back at my desk next to Jackie’s, right next to me, I wondered, <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">did they want me to hear, or not?</i><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Vie said, propped on Jackie’s desk, “she suffers from depression?”
Jackie turned her head, her hand covering her mouth, but I heard, “It’s pretty
serious; that’s why he always looks like he has something on his mind.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>He worries about her.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I heard him talking on the phone about her.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">I thought, <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">that’s so sad
that he has to deal with that.</i><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>And I
wondered about her depression.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I thought
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">medicine could care for that</i>.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoBodyTextIndent" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">It wasn’t until later that I asked one of the guys that I found
out what was the true problem.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoBodyTextIndent" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Wow.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>So she’s mentally sick.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Is it genetics, stress, or what . . . I
wonder does he would want to talk about it?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>But how do I explain that I know?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>I’ve never discussed his wife before; do I start talking about her now?<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">I should’ve asked about her before now.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">Why
didn’t I?</i><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I find that the strangest
question of all.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Cowen’s words of praise had been a lifeboat to me drowning.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>When we discussed the agency, everything I
said and showed him he sincerely loved, expressing it in his eyes.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It made me want to do more.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Then suddenly when he pulled the plug, told
me that we wouldn’t be working together, it left me hurt, feeling rejected and
depressed.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Why?<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; tab-stops: .5in; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Actually, did I really want to
know?<o:p></o:p></span></i><br />
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;"><br /></span></i>
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;"><a href="http://flourishanyway.hubpages.com/hub/Frenemy-In-the-Workplace-5-Warning-Signs">http://flourishanyway.hubpages.com/hub/Frenemy-In-the-Workplace-5-Warning-Signs</a></span></i></div>
Lucretia McCloudhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07064997700656978645noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3766019299562717358.post-53112544176542065532015-06-09T07:04:00.000-07:002015-09-18T02:53:18.635-07:00Chapter Thirty-Seven...Is She On To Me?<br />
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;"><span style="font-size: small;">Chapter
Thirty-Seven</span></span></h1>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;"><o:p><br /></o:p></span>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Back so soon?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>What happened,
huh?” Vie says, turning in the passenger seat towards me, her body again in
denim jeans and jacket today, as I again drive us to work.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>“Can you really afford to stay here, just
drop everything in New York without getting kicked out or something?”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">For the moment I had fortunately forgotten her presence.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>But I don’t owe Vie any explanations for what
I do.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> <i>What does she do all day?</i></span><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>And after Friday’s humiliation she should be
happy I’m talking with her at all.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;"><i>I must have a soft spot for strays</i>, thinking of Emanon more so
than Vie.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I haven’t seen her since I got
back.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">I hope she’s okay.</i><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Vie, do you mind?” referring to her damp boots on the upholstery.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">The red convertible with black top is a beauty . . . with tan
interiors.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">What’s the matter with Vie?<o:p></o:p></i></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“What? . . . It’s a rental.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">What’s wrong with returning the
rental car like I found it?</span></i><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">--clean and in good condition.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">And she
knows the feet action bugs me.</i><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>But
she also knows I can’t fight with her and concentrate on getting to inside the
agency before it starts to rain again.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">And actually I’m just glad for
some company today,</span></i><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;"> even Vie.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Hey.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>So how long you
staying this time?”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">For the hundredth time, “Vie, I don’t know how long I’m staying—<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">no, for the thousandth time.</i><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Really.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>I don’t know.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“If you ask me, you might as well pack up your stuff in New York
and make mommy happy.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I mean, weren’t
you just outta here Friday and you already came running back.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Did I ask for her opinion?<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Vie, you wouldn’t like me to move here too?” I ask all innocent,
glancing at her quickly, yet concentrating on the fast moving traffic.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“You know what I want.”<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Yes I do; for me to go back to
New York and take you with me.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span></i><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">At least I
admire her honesty.<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><o:p></o:p></i></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Diamond.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Is your mother
the only reason you’re staying?”<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>She
looks at me straight on.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>“What about the
famous Mr. Riley?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>He’s hot and he could
be your type.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Old and serious.” <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">I almost choke at the wheel.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“What? . . . How can you say that? . . . And why do you think you
know my type?”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">The name Sky Blue springs to my mind.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I wonder, <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">what
would she think about him?</i><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Though Cowen is wonderful.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>He definitely was a good sport about Friday.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>And his vibrancy was contagious; you were
just swept along with it.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The agency
needs him.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">I ignore her question with my own, “What do you think, Vie?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Would you like working at the agency?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I could train you for my position.”<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I do feel it’s becoming a little too
dangerous to stay on.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Naw.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I’ve got to keep my
options open.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>If I change my mind, I’ll
let you know.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>So.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>How was New York?” Vie asks, as we get closer
to the agency.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Too short,</span></i><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;"> is what I
want to shout, but I say, “Oh, it was good; but with Mom’s accident. . .” <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I leave the sentence dangling, knowing that
Vie really didn’t care.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Yeah, I know. . . Diamond. . . About New York.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Why did you really go back?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>There’s nobody there that you like?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>No investments?”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">I laugh, “Investments?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Like
what?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>A boyfriend?”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Yeah . . . someone special.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Someone you look forward to seeing.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">As if I’d tell you</span></i><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Look at you,” she continues.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>“I don’t want to give it to you, but the guys like you.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Don’t tell me that someone hasn’t tapped
that,” she finishes cocking the ringed eyebrow at my lap.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Shut up Vie!” I say disgusted, cringing, wishing to cover
myself.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>“Have some class.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Gawd,” I say rolling my eyes.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>“Anyway . . . I’ve got friends.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>That’s all I need right now; I’ve got things
to do.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I’m too young to get tied
down.”<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Sky again comes to mind, <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">but
would I discuss him with her?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I think
not.</i><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Plus, I don’t really know him,
though the discovery might be stimulating.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">In any event with Mom’s arm in a cast, she can’t really begin; so,
I’m not going anywhere for a little while.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>And she has me over an emotional barrel; so a love life right now is out
of the question.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>But I decide to bait
Vie a bit.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Vie, I don’t think I’ll be at the agency much longer and I don’t
want Mr. Riley to become dependent on me. . . Do you think Mom would like
working here?”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Smiling she looks at me and says, “I think she’ll love it,” as we
pull into the parking lot.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Maybe she will,</span></i><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;"> I think,
facing the agency’s brick exterior.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">I try to match it—the brick front—with a determined; “Here we go,”
only looking forward to the idea of decorating discussions in Cowen’s office,
exiting the car.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Yes, here we go,” says Vie, already at the door.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>“Let our workday begin.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Our workday?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
Lucretia McCloudhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07064997700656978645noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3766019299562717358.post-64780290588905699632015-06-05T14:16:00.001-07:002015-09-17T07:39:35.792-07:00Chapter Thirty-Six...Is She On To Me?<br />
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Chapter Thirty-Six<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<b><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi_UyBAeapZOwCV56dslUviU_RqylDvWWl3CFt3Nrl5k0JeXlVMDoZmSoiDK8EjnbJtlRissGgcCFBh88MoghOoqIkwpxo-PTNYfoqWxjFkRkNDt0UKbwGS6WCEsHFe6abIPBk4FYH1odlD/s1600/a10909ad4ab5b165459b8a87e22f6af6+%25281%2529.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi_UyBAeapZOwCV56dslUviU_RqylDvWWl3CFt3Nrl5k0JeXlVMDoZmSoiDK8EjnbJtlRissGgcCFBh88MoghOoqIkwpxo-PTNYfoqWxjFkRkNDt0UKbwGS6WCEsHFe6abIPBk4FYH1odlD/s320/a10909ad4ab5b165459b8a87e22f6af6+%25281%2529.jpg" width="213" /></a></span></b></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">While Mom slept, I slipped out of the house to go on a searching
mission.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I needed to make contact with
Madame.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I couldn’t stay here any longer
without letting her know of my presence in Chicago.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">After arriving at her fabulous apartment on the Magnificent Mile,
the Desk Attendant I persuade to allow me to just go straight up without an
announcement.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>This I managed, based on
his wrong conclusion that I was one of her constant stream of young visitors;
though he mentioned that they were <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">usually</i>
male.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I know I should have, but for some
reason, I had no desire to correct his misinterpretation.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Maybe on the
way out</span></i><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">, I rationalized.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Upon reaching the thirtieth floor, I braced myself for
whatever.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I felt neither anxiety nor
anger.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>But, by the expression on
Madame’s face when she opens the door, I think: <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">She feels only anger</i>.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Somehow I knew you would just show up here, uninvited.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>But, since you are here, the news must be
good.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>So then this visit should not take
too long.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The condensed version please.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I would invite you in, but I have company.”</span><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-font-kerning: 0pt; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Her manner swiped away all intentions of lying.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>And actually I decide, <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">the truth is better</i>.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>So,
standing in the hallway I explain.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“No Madame.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It wasn’t a success.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Yes, I did find him, but he thinks I’m
trash.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Actually he thinks you and
Crystal are trash too.”<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>That bit of
information, while lifting my spirits, inspired her further anger.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Oh, he does; does he?”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Yes.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>He said ‘trash begets
trash.’<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Just what does he mean by that,
Madame?” I ask, enjoying, at least this bit of conversation.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Why didn’t you ask him?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Surely, you are not here as if I owe you anything, are you?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>After all I’ve done for you. . . Do you think
you could have lived as well as you did without me?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Notice, your mother’s life is nothing in
comparison.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>She has never even left the
city.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>And, if you did find him, that means
you have visited some interesting places.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Saw a bit more of life than you would have by staying here.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">I have to agree there.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">Still. . .</i><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Thank you.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I have enjoyed
my life.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>That is why I plan on returning
to it tomorrow.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I just stopped by
because I don’t understand what this was all about.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I have the feeling that you knew things would
fall apart.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Why did I lie?<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“No.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>There is where you are
wrong.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I thought you would be
successful.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>You were always a bright
child.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I had hopes for you to be able to
make it.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>All my life I’ve struggled to
make sure that we had a roof over our heads.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>At times, by any means necessary.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>I’ve succeeded.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>But I had no
intention of forever carrying you girls.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>You needed to be self-sufficient.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Unfortunately, Crystal is not.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Her every move is dependent upon a man.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>I tried to show her otherwise, but you see how that turned out. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Anyway, I am actually sorry to see that you
have failed.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Hopefully, you have not
gotten yourself evicted.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“No!<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Of course not.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Why would you think that?”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“I didn’t.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I just hoped you
hadn’t.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The apartment has been mine
since the ‘80’s,’ even though it has changed hands.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I’ve heard that the value of it has
increased.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Unfortunately, my sister
almost lost it when she allowed her unruly charge to live there.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>That is also why I sent you to live
there.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Let the new owners see that they
did not make a mistake in allowing us to maintain occupancy.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“No wonder. . .”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“As long as we maintain a good working relationship with them, the
apartment can still be ours at a reasonable rate.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>And you must admit that the quality cannot be
compared to any other.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Especially at
that cost.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">No.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>She had a point.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>My friends were amazed by my place.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Probably, why they were my friends</span></i><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Seneca, would have been icing on the cake.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>An opportunity to show your mom that you can
succeed without dependency on a man; yet, still have one.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“But how would she have known?”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“You would have kept him a secret?”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Madame must have forgotten that Mom and I hadn’t spoken before in
ten years.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">Did she really think that I would reappear just to spite her? . . . Was
that what she had hoped?<o:p></o:p></i></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Somehow I think Madame’s explanation is much too simple. . . <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">But how do I get at the truth?</i><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Madame, Crystal thinks that you hate her.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>If I would’ve got back with Seneca, don’t you
think that would have just validated her opinion?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Do you think that she would’ve learned a
lesson?”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“What are you saying? . . . Crystal knows I love her.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I do not NEED to say it!<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Just like I do not NEED to say it to
you.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>My actions over the years have
shown it.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>That is what’s wrong with
young people.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Always wanting more.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Never appreciative of what they have.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I did not have.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I MADE my way.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I DID NOT have the backing of any man to
support me.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>But I made it and will
continue to do so.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“But the house, Madame.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Where did the house come from?”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Just what are you asking?”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Crystal showed me pictures of when she was young and it looks
like the same house I grew up in.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>She
said you hated her because you felt she was responsible for her father’s
death.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“And she was!<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>If she was an
obedient little girl he would still be alive . . . then I would have married
him.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Instead he died without us having
any security!<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Just what was I supposed
to do?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Who would’ve looked favorably
upon a black woman with a white child?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I
was on my own.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I left your great-aunt,
aunt, behind in New York to keep the rat-infested apartment, while I traveled
here to be nurse-maid to an ailing woman!<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>I couldn’t live on the premises, so I lived close.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>But she died and I had a child.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">What do you think would have happened if I were not an intelligent
woman?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Do you think that I would still
have a house, this place <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">and</i> an
apartment without any money?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>One must
use their brain to make it, young lady.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Beauty is fine, an asset; but it fades fast.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>In the end, without brains you’re lost. . .
Now if you will excuse me, your lesson is over for the day.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>In the future, I would prefer you call me
before just showing up.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">With that dismissal, I exit the building thinking . . . <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">so Madame did hate Crystal</i>.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Suddenly, I feel sorry for Mom. . . And extremely guilty.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">*<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Diamond, I think I’m ready now.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">I pause mid-chew, the last bite of toast scraping the roof of my
mouth.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Ready? . . .
For what?<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Looking across its grainy surface at Mom, my eyes glued to her
face, waiting apprehensive for the explanation, my tongue toying with the abrasion.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Seated at the kitchen table, the sun tries to force its presence
despite thick clouds.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>That’s sort of how
I feel this morning with Mom’s reappearance to the breakfast scene—strained
cheer amidst gloom.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Through necessity I
got reacquainted with isolated meals.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Now she sits across from me sipping a cup of tea—without addictives I
presume, like this ritual had never stopped.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“I’m sorry Mom, what are you saying?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>My mind was somewhere else.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Maybe she
didn’t say what I think she said.<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
<br />
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“I can take that job off your hands now, Diamond.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I’m sorry I didn’t step in sooner,” she
continues placing the cup daintily in its saucer on the tabletop.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">I think, <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">really?</i>
shocked, but more irritated by her faint smile and brown eyes gazing steadily
at me.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>No.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The news doesn’t thrill me.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
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<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Why now?</span></i><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;"> I want to
ask, at the same time wondering: <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">what’s
the matter with me?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Why am I
overreacting?<o:p></o:p></i></span></div>
<br />
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<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Or am I?</span></i><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">What I think I resent is her snapping her little fingers and
expecting everything to fall into place; especially when I practically begged
her to step in weeks ago.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“But what about your accident? . . . You’re not well yet.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Oh, it hurts a little, but you’ve been so good to me, that I’m
sure it won’t give me any problems.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I’ll
take it slow.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">But I just can’t leave now.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Cowen gave me an assignment; one that I liked.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I love the direction in which he’s taking the
agency, so I want the responsibility of redecorating the office. I take that
seriously; how your establishment looks can make or break your business.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It’s the least I can do, especially with my
previous behavior and all the negative insinuations regarding my capabilities
in the office.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Now Mom wants to take the job.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>I’m going to need a little time to digest; I have to introduce the idea
to Cowen.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Sure Mom.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I’ll start
working on the transition right away.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Funny.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Before I left I
wanted to dump the job right into her lap and now. . . .<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“So, Diamond.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>How do you
think this will work?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Should I review
the forms and things again, or are you doing something else?”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Oh, we’ll go over the forms again.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Those are pretty necessary.”<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>And I’m not sure about my giving up the
decorating--.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
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<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">But I did
take on this job for her, didn’t I?<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
Lucretia McCloudhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07064997700656978645noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3766019299562717358.post-31045308494767511662015-06-05T14:10:00.000-07:002015-06-05T14:10:12.683-07:00Chapter Thirty-Five...Is She On To Me?<br />
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Chapter Thirty-Five<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg1A6p7_MTymQjJ1VHAIHKkpidJDlpvzb-iQnY39pKC5r1MptC9LwcgC7B8u3B5s-JB4rBc_jN5dX-qAumwh6_en2m-dmKuM-gVFRCfpTTL_2w4PBk2cz1fFxlvZD7rYhEMXbqMPIbpc_B6/s1600/fc2537dc2471975f4c9dde16087ab6ef.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg1A6p7_MTymQjJ1VHAIHKkpidJDlpvzb-iQnY39pKC5r1MptC9LwcgC7B8u3B5s-JB4rBc_jN5dX-qAumwh6_en2m-dmKuM-gVFRCfpTTL_2w4PBk2cz1fFxlvZD7rYhEMXbqMPIbpc_B6/s320/fc2537dc2471975f4c9dde16087ab6ef.jpg" width="211" /></a></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Morning came too soon; brought with it an extreme headache—<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">probably the subconscious dread of coming
back to Mom’s house and life for me</i>.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>After showering, I try to maximum my moments by first calling for a cab,
giving myself fifteen minutes to walk down to Gracie’s cafe to grab coffee and
a bagel on-the-run. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Racing through the lobby, I catch sight of Prudence chatting
happily with some young people in the lobby.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>I hear her, “Yes, getting ready for work,” before she sees me.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Her eyes seem to ask, “Leaving already?” as I nod quickly with a
shrug of my shoulders.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I motion and
mouth a sincere, “I’ll call you when I get back,” as I continue towards the
door.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I’m envious of the leisurely pace
of window shoppers, book browses—new and used—etc.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">That
used to be my routine,</i> I remember.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">When I arrive back to the hotel, I see the back of a taxi before
my building.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Rushing back inside, I say
good-bye to the new gentleman at the desk, grab my duffel bag, which I pulled
out to retrieve my few things from Chicago, then leave; remembering; <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">that’s right!<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I never received my luggage from the airport.<o:p></o:p></i></span></div>
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<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Darn it!</span></i><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I break a nail on the cab door, slamming it
before punching the numbers of the airport, while watching the early
risers—joggers and dog-walkers—still on hold.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>The driver peels off for LaGuardia making me feel like I’m suddenly in
charge of the war on terrorism.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Careening down the BQE—Brooklyn Queens Expressway—in the taxi felt
like a racecar simulator, speeding, veering swiftly—right/left, then braking to
near standstills amidst a barrage of horn honking.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Funny, I’m not even terrified.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Though I do tap on the divider.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Sir, it’s okay; I’m in no hurry.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>My plane doesn’t leave for another two hours,” I try to say
nonchalantly.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Yes Miss,” he responded, but didn’t slow down.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Saint Michaels Cemetery flashed by on my left at breakneck speed,
the landmark proclaiming, “Ten minutes to the airport,” since traffic today is
no problem.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Still on hold, I contend instead with the jostling and veering.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">After arriving at the airport, the driver rushes around to open my
door, but I’m already out.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I ask, “Were
you trying to terrorize me?” <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“No Miss!<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I show you I got
skills.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I get you here safely.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">And he did, though ordinarily I probably would have jokingly
responded, “Thank you for helping me realize how much I value life.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>One day I will be able to afford a personal
driver and he won’t terrorize me.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Today I just paid him; yet he keeps standing before me.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“That’s not enough?” I ask, since he continues to look at the
money in his hand.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>”Miss Sexy Sax?” he
asks with a wink, reaching into his top pocket of his plaid shirt to hand me
his card.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>“You are de lady that plays in
the subway, yes?”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">I say, “I do play in the subway, but I don’t call myself ‘Miss Sexy
Sax.’”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“No?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>You should.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Everyone else does. . . When you play again?
. . . Soon?”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Spring,” I say, pleased.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Good.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>This ride on
me.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>One day I work for you.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Well maybe you will.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Thank
you.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
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<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">My bright
spot in an otherwise dreary day,</span></i><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;"> I think as he drove off.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">The flight and taxi ride to Mom’s house goes smoothly, though Mom
stayed on my mind.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Somehow I can’t help
feeling this is really no accident.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">*<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Hey, I made it back,” I call from the living room.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">I hear her slight voice from her bedroom, “Honey, I’m here in
here.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Dropping my bags by the door, I head to her room. The darkness in
the room caused by the drawn deep green velour drapes, still bars the true pale
green color of the walls from recognition.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>However, the mosquito net hanging delicately from an arch in the ceiling
plays tricks with my eyes, in that it presents Mom as an unearthly hazy
creature, one on the verge of expiration.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">At her bedside, I pull back the netting; asking “What happened,
Mom?”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Mom is propped up in bed among many pillows.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>She looks ashen.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Placed snuggly against the pale green and
cream comforter is Mom’s arm in a sling.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“It’s not much, honey.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I
had a little accident and my arm is sprung.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>That’s all.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>They’re working on
the car.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It’s a little dented up.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I’ve arranged for you to pick up a rental
tomorrow.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Mom, how did it happen?”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Well.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Friday night was a
little icy, so I hit a slick spot.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I was
fortunate after hitting a tree.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“You hit a tree?”<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Suddenly
I feel horrible.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>“You could have been
killed?”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“But I wasn’t.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Don’t worry.
. . Was your trip nice?”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Yes, Mom.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It was--.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Good.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>If you want
something to eat, I have some leftovers in the refrigerator.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Would you mind heating me something up too?”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Sure, Mom.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>No problem.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">She looks so peaked that I think: <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">we’ll talk details later</i>.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>But
come to think about it, <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">what details
could I have?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>About my flights?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Is that what she means?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I didn’t have time for anything else.<o:p></o:p></i></span></div>
<br />
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Before leaving the room, I had noticed that around Mom, spread out
on the coverlet, are pictures.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>They even
overflowed from another floral hatbox jammed with pictures.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Pictures
now?<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
<br />
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Earlier, I wanted this moment, a bonding, to go home with some
semblance of kinship.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>To tell Madame it
was a success; that her words, “she causes death to everything” weren’t
true.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>But now a numbness washes over
me.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I feel like a tube, a hollow dark
cylinder in which I’ve somehow manage to fall into, spiraling down into myself;
freefalling.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>But strangely enough it
doesn’t scare me.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Though, the tears are present,
ready to flow, they only request a release.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Maybe a cleansing.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Nothing more. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Mom interrupts my thoughts with, “I’ve been wanting to show you
these for years,” not even noticing my nonchalance.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>She pushes the box towards me across the bed.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>She had taken out a few, also placing them
before me.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">I guess
she’s not that hungry after all,</span></i><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;"> I think, leaning to glance down
at some black and white snapshots of a little girl who resembled me at about
six years of age, except for the hair.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>The little girl wore hers braided, straight, whereas mine grew wild,
uncontrollable, which I hated.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The girl
held the hand of a striking woman that looked like a younger version of Madame,
both solemn.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Know who that is,” Mom asks, sitting up to peer.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“You?” I ask, not really caring.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Yes and Madame,” she says, slumping back.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">After a moment, I notice that they’re standing in front of this
same house.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">This</i> catches my attention.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">That’s
strange.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Mom and I grew up in the same
house or is there another one similar?<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">I perch on the edge of the bed and wait patiently for Mom to
explain her reason for bringing out the photos.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>She then proceeds to hand me photographs of her at different stages of
her life, though none of them seemed to go past the age of sixteen, and none in
which she smiles.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“What do you think?” asked Mom.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
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<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">What am I to
think?</span></i><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The pictures told me
nothing, except that she and Madame were always unhappy.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>But I say, “We look more alike then.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Yes, but did you notice anything else?”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Not caring for the guessing game I say, “Only that you and
grandmother didn’t smile a lot.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">I didn’t
mention the house because I feel it’s too late</span></i><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">She must have sensed it, because with her good arm she swooped up
the pictures, put them back in the box and pushed the lid on it.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>She looked as if she were considering
something before she spoke again. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“No we didn’t smile a lot.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>There wasn’t much to smile about. . . You knew of course, that your
grandfather died when I was a little child didn’t you?”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Yes, Madame mentioned it briefly.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>She said it was a freak accident.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>He slipped and fell and broke his back.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>He didn’t die instantly.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>She
nursed him for months until he just gave up living,” I say my voice flat.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Did she mention anything, else?”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Only that she really loved him and how wonderful he had been to
her the eight years they’d been married.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>She said, ‘she couldn’t have asked for a better life.’”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">While I talked Mom started crying.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>She reached into her robe pocket and took out some tissue.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>After blowing her nose, Mom said, “Diamond,
Madame hated me.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>“No she didn’t,” I say
after she finishes.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>“She spoke of you
often, mostly in regrets but never with hatred.”<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I didn’t want to lie, <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">but what else could I say?</i><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>This could go on all night<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Her eyes widen in surprise, as she says, “But that can’t be true.
. . Why didn’t she ever call?”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">I ask, “Why didn’t you?”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“I couldn’t,” she says with bitterness.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>“She blamed me for my own father’s
death.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>They were my toys he tripped
over.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>She said it was my fault.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“But, Mom.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>You were just a
child.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Those kind of accidents happen. .
. It was terrible, but what could you do?” I ask ready to leave the room.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I’ve had enough of this conversation.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Well she did.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>She blamed
me.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>That’s why we were so unhappy.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Mom, come on.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>There must
be a misunderstanding.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>She couldn’t
really blame you.” <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>But I knew she
did.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Yet I believe that this conversation
is not about that.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I stand up, hopefully
an indication that this topic is over.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Mom
seems to be trying to solicit sympathy from me, but right now I can’t produce
any.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
Lucretia McCloudhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07064997700656978645noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3766019299562717358.post-77998263495347208332015-06-05T06:46:00.000-07:002015-06-05T06:46:50.551-07:00Chapter Thirty-Four...Is She On To Me?<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<b>Chapter Thirty-Four</b></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj9I-SuIqKb7jZpSTGoaVE92hkVJa3P9waGJWZUF8NV2jYZNojnRiT_VcvbUnuYwTW3vmjYHO5Ia5uT2seMDcu8vmqRrHAyxM3OO6CPkO1NZ8jr75hnMmoMCGKoHls262oHnafBAVp25mTI/s1600/512cc1a09a2781a04df91c7585114a0a.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj9I-SuIqKb7jZpSTGoaVE92hkVJa3P9waGJWZUF8NV2jYZNojnRiT_VcvbUnuYwTW3vmjYHO5Ia5uT2seMDcu8vmqRrHAyxM3OO6CPkO1NZ8jr75hnMmoMCGKoHls262oHnafBAVp25mTI/s320/512cc1a09a2781a04df91c7585114a0a.jpg" width="240" /></a></div>
</div>
<br />
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">My fingers lingering on the smooth metal handle of Prudence’s
door, I glance down abstractly noting my untied bootlace through eyes blurred
by her sincere interest in me.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Treading carefully down the hall, I find myself accepting the
warmth of her concern with a partial smile; thinking, <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">she’s kind, though mistaken.</i><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>I’m certain, Ms. Nobles shouldn’t worry about me, though she probably
feels she warrants her vested interest.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>That one night in particular only senility would erase, <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">if then,</i> I think, though I’m convinced
that Prudence isn’t inclined in that direction.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Anyway, that night finding Seneca, our last conversation—between
he and I—left me incoherent, a limp and emotional mess outside this building, I
recall after closing my apartment door.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>It caused both doorman and lobby attendant to attribute my loose footing
to a drunken stupor.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">I appreciated her personal interest and their kindness, she
afterwards ensuring that I wanted for nothing in the way of emotional
support.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>She and her friends would drop
off flowers and cards and ring my phone showing me the value of good neighbors.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">The only thing is: <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">I am
grateful; but I’ve haven’t actually invited her into my life and my personal
business.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I am an adult; so am I not
qualified in making some serious decisions? . . . Haven’t I been doing that all
along?<o:p></o:p></i></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">And anyway I
had only one drink, </span></i><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">I recollect, making certain that the running
water for my bubble bath doesn’t scald.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Stripping, I let my body slide down the back of the porcelain tub,
totally, hoping to submerge some of the sketchy constantly resurfacing
memories.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>But I can’t.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>His words, “What kind of sick chick are
you?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Is this a game?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>A game for you too?”<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>He paused, his eyes suddenly sorrowful as he
ended with, “You were the one good thing that came out of that time period; the
only thing I didn’t regret.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I had high
hopes for you, Diamond, but I guess genetics; both your mother’s and
grandmother’s are just too strong.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">In my mind those words translated, “Garbage begets garbage.”<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The insinuation singes even now.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>“Garbage.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Trash.”<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The terms tore at me;
tear at me.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>A whip slashing my pride,
its tip nicking my heart.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Many years of
doctoring the hurt from abandonment, building my self-esteem, then one moment
ripped away my self-respect.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Nothing
touched the self-hatred I felt that night.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">I fled.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I remember banging
my knee against the corner on the office door, seeing bright flashing lights,
when the close pounding heaviness from a man’s pursuit absolved all thought of
pain.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">My breath burning my throat, I stumbled through the tables, the
nearing exit my aim, not knowing which man gained in quick chase.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Then, I felt strong fingers gripping my shoulder, screaming,
Seneca! before his deep, “Diamond, stop--,” was cut short; his hand sliding off
my skin.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Free, I reached the street, a
taxicab lingering due to that night’s session.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>I yanked open the door, begging the driver to speed off, turning to see
Seneca and the young man in battle.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">The water turned lukewarm as the bubbles disintegrate.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">What time is
it?</span></i><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;"> I wonder;
feeling nauseated.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">The bathroom clock reads: <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">Nine
thirty?</i><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">No wonder I feel sick—refusing to attribute any of my discomfort
to the recent memory.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">I am starving.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I haven’t eaten all day</i>.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Climbing out, I don a robe headed for the kitchen, slowing down to
tour the apartment.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I had missed my wingchair
at the end of the hall.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>And low and
behold, my philodendron survived; she flourished beautifully—<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">Oh</i>.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">I had forgotten that I asked a housekeeper to take care of the
plant, until I saw it.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>And the place
smelled great; all in direct conflict with Mom’s place—<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">even though that house is still special to me.</i><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It seems an eternity since I’ve been inside
these walls.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Dragging my hand along the
windowsills of the tall arched windows I loved, I gazed out onto Manhattan,
stroking the silk drapes, which add elegance to my eclectic style, until I
reached my French doors leading onto the patio.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">I retrieved my celebration
bottle of champagne from when Nanette offered me my first big account,
figuring, <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">I might as well open it now,
since I’ve lost the account</i>.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Before
clearing the glass, I make myself a BLT sandwich, which I eat while sipping the
reminder champagne before the living room’s fireplace.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">I’m home in
my beautiful home,</span></i><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;"> I think, since it’s been a taxing day.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">I see the blinking answer machine, but don’t want to be disturbed
right now.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Everyone’s heard my message;
though I’d better make a new one stating: I’m back.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">But I block out work, which reminds me of Nanette’s anger.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Instead I sit reliving a couple of emotions
I’d experienced today—the foreign, though exhilarating ones involving Sky.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>After thoughts about Cowen and reminders
about Seneca, Sky’s attentiveness built me up.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">After a while I feel that I can deal with Nanette.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I decide; <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">I
won’t give up that easy.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I’ll just march
into her apartment tomorrow with a whole slew of ideas.<o:p></o:p></i></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“The luggage!”<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I’ve got to
call the airport.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Before calling I listen to my messages.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The first voice, sounds <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">like Mom?</i><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>An animated Mom
using the word, <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">“accident?”</i><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">An
accident?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span></i><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">I replay the
message.<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><o:p></o:p></i></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Diamond, honey.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I’ve been
in an accident.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Can you please come
straight home?”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Home?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I can’t believe this; Mom I am home.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I just got here.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">This was the first time in a while that I felt partially myself; <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">I’m not wanted there; and she wants me to
come rushing back?<o:p></o:p></i></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">The message was recorded at two o’clock and I haven’t received
another from her.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Plus, it didn’t sound
as if she’d called from the hospital, <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">so
she must be all right</i>.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">I sit awhile regretting the fact that I hadn’t told her I wasn’t
coming back.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Now it seems sort of a mean
trick to pull.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">But I don’t
want to go back,</span></i><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;"> I whine, childish.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>With Mom and her wish that I were dead and
Vie’s and Jackie’s antics there was nothing for me there.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It took them to help me realize that I love
my life here.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">And what
about Sky tomorrow? . . . </span></i><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">And shopping for Nanette’s redemption?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><o:p></o:p></i></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">I feel bad for Mom, but for myself too.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">To turn
right around and go back? . . . Is she serious? . . . Why does she think I
would want to? . . . And what happened? . . . How did Mom have an accident? </i>suddenly
remembering that I had gotten the car towed.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Instead of savoring the rest of the evening, I give the airlines a
call to get set up for the earliest possible flight tomorrow.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I’m going to have to put on plans for Nanette
and Sky on hold for a minute.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">I grab a wine glass filling it with a couple of cubes of ice and
more champagne not caring if this is the way it’s done.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Then I light a set of candles, placing them
on the small bistro table on the patio, though the wind keeps blowing them out despite
the hurricane glass.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>So I turn on the
gas fireplace instead, settling on the sofa between the set of French doors in
the living room.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">I watched the many lights of Manhattan through the glass doors,
planning on enjoying my own bed—<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">at least
tonight</i>--without sags or needing to become a contortionist.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Matter-of-fact, I’m planning on enjoying this
whole evening.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Funny</span></i><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The only consolation to going back was
Emanon.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>An inspirational cat.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">I’ve got to
think up a suitable name</span></i><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;"> for her.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
Lucretia McCloudhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07064997700656978645noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3766019299562717358.post-16496402650460141012015-06-05T06:44:00.000-07:002015-09-15T02:14:21.377-07:00Chapter Thirty-Three...Is She On To Me?<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<b>Chapter Thirty-Three</b><br />
<b><br /></b>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Fumbling with my keys, I ask the front desk attendant about my
mail while out of the corners of my eyes I see Mrs. Nobles, true to word,
waiting on the sofa.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Patiently?<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
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<i><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Who knows,</span></i><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;"> I almost sigh, remembering
Prudence’s bat senses.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Ms. Duprey, we’ve sent most of your mail to your room
already.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>You just have a few catalogs
that came in today.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>If you can wait a
second I’ll get them for you.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Sure.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>And thank-you,” I
say, watching him bend to gather my things from a folder in the drawer beside
him.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Still I refuse to turn around and
face Prudence, peeved; <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">what right does
she have to interfere in my life?</i><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I
restrain myself from beating a pattern on the granite desktop.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I can imagine her perched in pristine
regality on the edge of the sofa, the same sofa I laid, sprawled across,
obviously a complete spectacle late one evening, months ago now.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Remembering I think, <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">she’s
probably disappointed in me.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Especially
with the way I’m dressed.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I bet she
thought I already passed this stage;</i> I smirk inwardly.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">That’s
what she gets; she doesn’t know or own me, ruining my evening,</i> I gripe,
collecting my packages from the hands of the attendant.<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><o:p></o:p></i></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Ms. Nobles, are you alright?”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">The concern in both voice and face of the attendant spins me to
Prudence tilting sideways on the sofa.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">I drop my packages back onto the counter before rushing, along
with the door attendant, to her side.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“I’m okay,” she says, sitting upright, then readjusting her jacket
after her deep nod.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>“It’s just been a
long tiring trip.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“I believe you,” the deskman says, leaning over her, after he
secured the desk.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>“I’m really sorry to
hear about your grandsons,” he continues his voice low.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Thank-you, William.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“What happened?” asks the young door attendant, to the facial
dismay of William.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“It’s alright,” Prudence says with a faint smile.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>“I can talk about it.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>But first, what’s your name.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I don’t think I’ve had the pleasure of
meeting you,” she says in her southern drawl.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Paul.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Paul Long.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Well, nice to meet you Paul.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>And this young lady standing before me is my neighbor, Diamond Duprey.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">After our greetings, she tells about the accidental drowning of
one of her grandsons—the well-behaved one, and the drug related death of the
other, both funerals held together.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">And she’s sitting here concerned about me?</i>
I wonder amazed, watching her take hold of the walkers’ handles, struggling to
rise with her severe rheumatoid-arthritic hands.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Gripping her arm, I try to pull, but she gently shakes off my
hand, saying, “Thank you, honey; I’d love your help.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>But you know, this week everyone’s handled me
with kid gloves.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Now I’m home.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I need to do this myself,” she says still
struggling.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>“Just give me a second.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The hardest part is standing up, but after
that I’m homeward bound,” she ends with a big grin.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>“But stay close; I just may need you.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Just not this time.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Okay?”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">I smiled, staying close,
remembering that I practically lifted her with ease despite her solid
looks.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">She’s lost weight</i>.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Usually prepared for cold, the wool suit under a black wool cape
with a colorful silk scarf tossed jauntily around her shoulders gave her
deceptive bulk.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">But her hair</i>—stylishly short and gray—<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">is uncovered,</i> I note, then realizing; <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">oh, the scarf around her shoulders is actually for her hair.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>That’s more like her, </i>I acknowledge,
smiling into watery gray eyes.<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><o:p></o:p></i></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">I touch her hand—its skin covered with brown age spots and her
thin shriveled fingers wearing beautiful pearl and diamond rings, surprised at
the softness, her warm smile disappearing as she moves her walker towards the
glass doors.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Paul follows with my
packages.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Our slow pace allowed me to think back to Ms. Nobles rendition of
that night not long ago.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Her version,
since I couldn’t remember mines went this way: She said she came in late—<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">again from out-of-town, </i>finding me on
the sofa, because the young night desk attendant didn’t know what to do with
me.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The young man had been waiting for
security or management to deal with me.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>But Prudence volunteered to escort me upstairs, with the help of two
sturdy fellows, I being dead weight.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">So there she was, a woman with rheumatoid arthritis, and a walker,
taking responsibility for a mature businesswoman, myself; delirious.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>They got me into the elevator and into my
apartment.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>She actually stayed with me
until I slept—this stranger.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I remember
waking on the sofa to her in my wing-backed chair.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Later, she filled me in with more details.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Actually, someone found me on the front step,
outside the hotel, recognized me; then walked me into the lobby.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>There was where she found me.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>She vouched for my character and told the building
overseer that she would talk with me, because she believed that this was an
isolated event.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">I relive that embarrassment, wondering; <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">how can I stay upset with her?</i><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Her “Diamond, honey, I’ve missed seeing you.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>If you’ve got a minute, how about telling me
what you’ve been doing over a cup of tea.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>You got time for the old lady?” brings me back, standing outside the
elevator.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Sure,” I say, sneaking a glance at my watch.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">It’s
only eight o’clock.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Still early.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>If the plants haven’t died by now, they won’t.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></i>“Sure, I’ve got more than a minute.”<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><o:p></o:p></i></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Holding open the door for her and Paul, I look around the inner
and outer lobby realizing; <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">I really
missed this place</i>.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The Italian
design is a far cry from the decay and dampness of Mom’s place.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>And here there’s a continuous flow of
residents and guests—always an air of excited activity.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">Everyone
here on the go</i>.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Mrs. Nobles makes it though the glass door, while I push the
elevator button as she begins to tell me about Virginia where her son and
daughter-in-law live.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>When we reach the
tenth floor she fumbles for the keys to her apartment, but grins at me.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Have you been doing any reading?”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Reading?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Oh.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Her magazines</span></i><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“No, Ms. Nobles.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I’ve been
working two jobs, and I have missed them, but. . .”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“You will.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I know.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I’ll give you the latest ones before you
go.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Anyway, did I ever tell you about
the time my son wanted to buy his first car?”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“No.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I don’t think you
have.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Well, come on in and I’ll tell you.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Before entering her place I give Paul the keys to place my things
in my room across the hall, asking him to, “Just leave the door unlocked and
the keys on the hallway table, would you, Paul?”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“No, problem.” He answers, lobbing off.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Tall Paul;</span></i><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;"> I grin.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">After helping Prudence remove her coat, I place it in her hallway
closet, but before removing mine I remember my outfit—<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">Mrs. Nobles won’t approve</i>.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">She observed my hesitation and laughs her tinselly laugh.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>“It’s okay, honey.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I’ve already seen it.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Relax, while I put on the tea.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Embarrassed, I obey, then glance around her small studio
apartment, impressed with how neat everything is.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Her style resembled those of my classmate’s
grandmothers, the classic grandmother style—chintz-covered sofas and loveseats,
with crocheted throws and dollies everywhere.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>I smile.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Knick-knack heaven.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">But upon closer examination, I notice that’s she’s collected items
from all over the world—Russian dolls, exquisitely carved wooden boxes—<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">from Africa?</i> Unique colorful glass—<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">from Italy?</i>—enclosed behind a large
glass breakfront.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">I think; <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">I’ve got to ask her
about where she’s been</i>. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">There’s also a strong smell of peppermint, probably because of her
tea.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Over the rattle of pots and the
sound of running water, Mrs. Nobles goes on to tell her story.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“My son was a very good boy, never got into any trouble.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>So my husband Nathaniel and I decided to
allow him to purchase an automobile when he reached the age of seventeen—his
very own car.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>He was so excited because
he had been saving his money from back-breaking odd-jobs for some time.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">I settled back against the small round pillows, smiling as she
worked.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>This might be awhile.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">She continued, “Bobby—Robert was his real name, but we called him
Bobby.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Bobby worried us every day about
that car; but we told him to take his time.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>His money was going nowhere, so there was no need to rush.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>But you know young people—always in a
hurry.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">So Nathaniel and I told him to go and take a look around.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>When he found something he liked we would go
and look at it together.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>But mind you,
we didn’t just send him on his way without some things to consider.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>No, that wouldn’t be right since young people
can be so impressionable.”<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Again she smiled.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“We knew Bobby was familiar with cars, because Nathaniel, his
father and my husband, owned a couple of them over a period of time and Bobby
would work on them with him.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>But
sometimes, you know. . .”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">The teakettle starts to whistle.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Honey, would you pour the tea for us.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>That’s a dear,” she said as I went over to
the stove.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>“Everything’s right
there.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Just bring the whole tray over.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">I did and went on to pour while she talked.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Thank-you, honey. . . Now where was I?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Oh. . . Like I said before he saved his
money, so we told him to be very careful because he may never have a lump sum
like that again.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Nathaniel told him,
‘Don’t waste it on a lemon.’ <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">So Bobby went out on his own and fell in love with a yellow
convertible.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>A Buick, I think.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I don’t know.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>But, a yellow convertible.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>They
saw him coming.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">He was so excited, so pleased and confident in his judgment that
he forgot what we told him.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Did he wait
for us to inspect the car?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">No.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">He bought it right then and there.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>He brought it home without so much as a thorough check of the insides;
he was so taken with the outside.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>That
car made one ride onto our property and sat beautiful in our driveway for many
years after that.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Useless.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Savings wasted.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Now he did buy another car, a good one.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>But the feeling is never the same.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>If he would’ve just thought it through, his
first experience purchasing a car—after much time spent saving—could’ve been a
pleasure.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The car could’ve been both
beautiful and trustworthy.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Not a lemon.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Mrs. Nobles’ eyes twinkle, “get the point” over her cup and
saucer.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>She pauses and after a moment
says, “Drink up, honey, before it gets cold.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">After allowing me the opportunity for her story to sink in Mrs.
Nobles’ asks, “So, where did you go?”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">After updating her on my time away, I notice that her head starts
to droop occasionally, so I get up to leave.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>The movement jars her.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“I’m sorry, honey.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It’s
been a long day, but I’ve really enjoyed your visit.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>You must come again.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Soon.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Let me know how things are working out with your mom.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Thank-you.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I will.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">As I turn to leave she says in a voice wide awake, “I don’t like
his eyes.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">What? . . .
Whose?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Oh.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>She must mean Sky’s.<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Turning around, I respond, “But I love his eyes.” <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Come here,” she commands.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>So I walk over to her shriveling frame in the wingchair.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Bend down.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">I do.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">She touches my cheek, her smile serious, sad, and says, “Diamond,
let me tell you what you remind me of lately.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>A puppy chasing her tail.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Occasionally, you’ll yelp, but round-n-round you go in this vicious
circle.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I worry about you, Diamond.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I want you to recognize that circles are
stagnant; they go nowhere; they’re counterproductive.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>So open your eyes Honey.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Focus.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">I drop my eyes.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>She gently
grabs hold of my chin, forcing, then locking my gaze, continuing.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>“Your eyes are beautiful, Diamond, but
blind.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Don’t be blind.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>You’ve got so much to offer.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Promise me you won’t throw it all away.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“I won’t,” I promise standing and walking past a mirror on my way
to the door.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>After a brief glimpse I
find myself wondering if Sky thinks my eyes are beautiful too.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“And by-the-way,” her tired voice causes me to stop.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>“You’ve put on a little weight haven’t you?”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Ms. Nobles,” I say, staring, surprised.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Who wants to
hear that?<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“It looks good on you,” she continues.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>“The next clothe size will look wonderful on
you,” she finishes with a gleam in her eyes.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Before closing the door, as I turn for one last glance, I see her
head already resting peacefully on her chest, deciding; <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">nodding off in her chair is probably her routine</i>.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<br />Lucretia McCloudhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07064997700656978645noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3766019299562717358.post-35542360399314320102015-06-04T06:19:00.000-07:002015-06-04T06:19:14.817-07:00Chapter Thirty-Two...Is She On To Me?<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi9DRgt35j4iuAsvDvCGFzH4NCbQ9-a7vv-QPROYHfxBHGpbhIKcbDNIpZh8jErhLm60NyT-qtYh0zfiJwF2v0F4yR3icQnndwXLDZvQUn6axCBUM5ntcGLDftTNkjVUdt-sqrUP0OSrIdw/s1600/524f4266d9fa9dd0d5d2b6754f25f729.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi9DRgt35j4iuAsvDvCGFzH4NCbQ9-a7vv-QPROYHfxBHGpbhIKcbDNIpZh8jErhLm60NyT-qtYh0zfiJwF2v0F4yR3icQnndwXLDZvQUn6axCBUM5ntcGLDftTNkjVUdt-sqrUP0OSrIdw/s320/524f4266d9fa9dd0d5d2b6754f25f729.jpg" width="250" /></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Chapter Thirty-Two<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Fulton Ferry.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>My pier.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I’m so glad to be back—the dock an anesthetic
to sooth any inner beast.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>But tonight,
instead of sitting near the barge, I detour to sit beneath trees close to the
restaurant’s entrance.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I find a dark,
secluded spot, probably not smart, especially in my state, but what the
heck.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I’ll be careful, while enjoying
the mysterious allure of the East River and Manhattan through the lighted
branches.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Loving the solitude, I promise: <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">I won’t take this for granted,</i> thinking maybe I had, when a blast
of cold air causes me to choke inducing another coughing fit.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Quickly unzipping my bag I rummage inside and
withdraw the cough syrup.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">Those were the last two bottles,</i> I
remember regarding the airport store which provided my supply.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I swallow repeatedly coating a raw throat as
I rethink the last couple of weeks.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">I wonder, <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">what progress I
did I make?</i><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">The obvious answer, <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">none
that I could see. </i><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Failing Madame
first with Seneca; then Mom, since we aren’t any closer.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">I can’t
convince Madame this way</i>.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Pulling my
leather coat tighter, I glance down at myself, underneath the dim lights of the
yellow bulbs threaded through the trees, reminded; <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">I never changed</i>.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The black
wool pants suit still packed in my piece of carry on from this morning,
forgetting to change in haste.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Mr. Riley</span></i><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>My face I feel flush with thoughts of him
bringing back my embarrassment.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">But, he was wonderful,</i> I thought causing
a heat to spread through me.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">After a couple of minutes, I watch a few romantic couples who
somehow slipped onto benches opposite me.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Suddenly out of place I stoop to grab my bag.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Hello, again,” the voice familiar bolts me upright.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Squinting up into the lamplight, I try to recognize the man
standing in front of me.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Oh!<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The tweed-coat stranger</span></i><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I feel as if my smile will connect in the
back of my head, wondering, <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">why is he
causing my heart to race?</i><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Hello again,” he says in his beautiful warm voice, a question in
his eyes.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Yes, I’m
very happy to see you</span></i><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Hello yourself,” I say with more confidence, yet feeling silly
not knowing his name.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>“I remember your
face, but I never got your name.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>What is
it?”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Sky.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Sky Blue at your
service.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“You’re kidding.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Right? . .
. I mean . . . I love it, but did you change your name or something?”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Actually, I didn’t.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>My mother
felt pretty positive about me during her pregnancy, even though her boyfriend
left her.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>She felt like I was her blue
sky, especially since her last name was Blue.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>So there you have it.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Sky blue.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“I love it.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Sky.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Well nice to formally meet you, Sky.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I’m sorry that I didn’t recognize you that
last time.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Oh.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It’s okay under the
circumstances.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>You looked pretty
distraught.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I should have said who I was
right off the bat.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>But my vanity wants
to believe that I’m the kind of man women don’t forget,” he said laughing.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Though teasing, <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">he’s
probably right</i>.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Dark slacks and a
heavy gray sweater under his leather jacket—<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">he
makes quite an impression.</i><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Even his
smell you couldn’t forget—faint and familiar.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>He was definitely good-looking.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“You were my hero.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>How
could I forget you?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>You proved that
chivalry is not dead.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">He sits down beside me saying, “With a beautiful woman it’s <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">never</i> dead.”<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">His wonderful words don’t distract me from his habit of sitting
very close; though, <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">do I really want him
to move?</i> inhaling his woodsy scent.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">He continues, “I always seem to come across you when you’re
feeling down.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Are you okay?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Aren’t you happy?” he asks sounding
sincere.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>“You should be happy. . . What
do you think?” he concludes tilting his head.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>“Give me a chance; I’ll make you happy.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Wow</span></i><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>With anyone else that line would be corny;
but wouldn’t I like him to try? though I don’t answer.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Instead I ask; smiling, “So, Sky.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>What do you do?”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“You didn’t answer my question, but I’ll get back to it. . . I’m a
journalist.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>At least, that’s my
attempt.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Why I happened to be at the
club that night?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I wanted to do a short
article on jazz for a college course, so I wanted to interview the band, when I
saw you.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>A beautiful woman in
distress.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I was sorry that you needed my
help, yet more than happy to oblige. . . But, mystery woman, you’re very hard
to keep up with.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Where have you been
hiding?”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Finding him easy to talk with, I explained, “I went on a
mini-vacation.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I just needed to get
away.”<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Why? . . . Oh!<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I guess I’m
prying.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I’m sorry; I didn’t mean
to.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It’s just . . . well, I want to get
to know you better.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Though that
shouldn’t be difficult.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I kind of feel
as if I know you already.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Do you?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span></i><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">This seems impossible.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>A handsome hunk saves me twice and <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">I question getting to know him better? </i>while
something causes me to realize how dark the area has gotten.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">Maybe
the trees.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Maybe I should be heading
home.<o:p></o:p></i></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Standing up I thank him again wanting something more, but
thinking; <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">maybe it’s not a good idea.<o:p></o:p></i></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Again, you don’t answer me.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Why?”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Yes.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Why?<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Finally I come up with it; my perfect safe answer.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>“Why don’t you walk me home; you can get to
know me as we walk.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>How’s that?”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Now we’re talking.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">I grab hold of his arm, his arms strong through his dark leather
jacket, though mainly to steady myself.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>It seems that every time he’s around I’m dizzy.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>An unexpected moan escaped me.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>However I manage to stabilize myself, while
he takes my bags.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Are you alright?”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Yes.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Yes, I think so.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It’s just I’ve been running around since
early this morning.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I flew in from
Chicago, but I went to work this morning; my car got towed and I don’t think my
Mom is feeling well.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Plus I didn’t eat.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>So it’s probably the stress of everything,” I
explain as we exit our secluded spot.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“If your mother is sick in Chicago, why are you here?”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Wow!<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I wasn’t prepared for that;</span></i><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;"> I think
glancing up at him.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Well, she’s not extremely sick.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>And this is just a quickie necessity trip for my job.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I’m a dawning designer.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Fashion,” I say dropping his arm, but picking
up my pace.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>“I must eat.” <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“And a saxophonist.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Wow.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Talented.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>So.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>You going to be here tomorrow?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Maybe you can eat with me.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>How
about lunch?” he asks hooking my arm through his again.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Inwardly skipping, I contain my smile, angling my head to look
past him up at the stars.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I finally say,
“I think I’d like that.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Well onto Columbia Heights, walking separate but close, we slowly
stroll the promenade towards the hotel falling into a comfortable silence,
while watching boats along the river.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Every few steps my arm brushes his.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>This small gesture makes me catch my breath; tosses me into
light-headedness.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I wonder, <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">is it just me?</i><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">I sneak a quick glance up at him and find him looking down at me.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Again breathing, actually parting my lips to exhale, I thrill to
the irregularity of his breathe, finding his eyes not exactly on my face.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Following his gaze, I watch the front of my
fitted white shirt rise and fall rapidly.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>I raise my eyes drawn first to the strong line of his jaw, but resting
on his soft mouth.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Suddenly I tremble,
oblivious of any others strolling along this same path, the wind casting me a
whiff of new leather.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">How my legs managed to carry me to the hotel’s portico I’m
clueless.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>My immediate concern?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">How do
I invite him up without raising any eyebrows among my neighbors?</i><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Four years I’ve lived here and I’ve never
brought a single man into my apartment.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Never even gave it much thought.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>But now I’m torn.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>More than
anything I want this man upstairs, but I don’t want to give these really
religious people the wrong impression of me.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Standing facing him, our eyes level with me two steps above him, I
gaze at the slight hollow at the base of his throat.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I don’t/can’t move.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Sky tilts his head; catches my eyes; asks, “Do you have some
coffee?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I would love a cup.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Yes!<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Yes I should invite
him up for coffee.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>That’s perfect, my
body still not moving.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It knows; it’ll
never work, though I find myself staring at his chest.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>From me the small voice whispers, “Why don’t
we just stand here a second.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I haven’t
been up to my apartment yet.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I need to
see it first,” desire designing a plan.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“So you want me to stand here and just look at you for a
while?”<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">I blink confused as he continues, “The pleasure is all mine.”<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>He leans past me placing his arm against the
hotel.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The tiny brush against my face
lights a fire, the intensity of his stare raging the embers.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Needing to strip, my brain blurred knowledge:
late October, Indian summer, a street crowded with window-shoppers, used
bookstore browsers or people just sitting, eating or talking at the sidewalk
cafés, while restaurants interiors house people enjoying their cozy
warmth.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">Okay</i>.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">Cliché</i>; but I fought screaming, “Forget my neighbors;” thinking:
Tonight is for us, as his eyes travel me beginning with my face.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The journey takes in the length of my body.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Tightening my hands into fists in my pants pockets, I watched his
pleasure increase, surprising myself with my boldness.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>His faltered breathing gave me power.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Taking an exaggerated breathe, I removed a
hand to touch his face.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Instead, I reach
behind me and take his hand.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>No longer
concerned.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>My fingers entwine with his;
gazes not broken, I back up drawing him with me, not hearing outside sounds
with my heart a raging ocean; thundering.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Pounding—“Diamond!”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">What?! . . .
Who!<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Swinging around, I twist to a cold shocking douse of
Prudence.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Prudence Nobles leaning
heavily on her walker.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Lord no! </span></i><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">I
cringe.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">Of all the wet blankets</i>.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Her sharp pronunciation of my name forcefully killed any desire I
felt.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Here I stand now erect, cursing
her timing, but managing, “Oh hi, Mrs. Nobles.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">While I look at Prudence, she’s staring at Sky with that direct
piercing stare.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I felt she wanted him to
explain himself, but Sky’s gaze is just as unrelenting.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Even though his arm is still propped against
the hotel’s wall, his other hand clenches and unclenches tightly.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I also notice him gritting his teeth.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Mrs. Noble’s eyes shift to me and back to Sky.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“How have you been Diamond?” she asks me her eyes not leaving
him.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>“I’ve missed seeing you.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Is everything all right?”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">I myself wish that Mrs. Nobles would just disappear, but I answer
her.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>“Everything’s fine.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Thank you for asking.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Mrs. Nobles continues, “I’ve been wanting to talk to you, Diamond;
so when you finish here I’ll be waiting inside.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<i><span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Inside?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Waiting?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Why?<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">I want to shout, “No!<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I’m
grown and I’ve been on my own for four years.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>I can make my own decisions.”<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>But
I don’t.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I sneak a quick peek at Sky and
he’s looking at me as if to say, “Yes.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Tell her.”<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Instead, I say,
“Okay.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Give me a few minutes.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Sure.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Take your time,” she
said; but I knew she meant, “Rap it up.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Quickly.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">All of this couldn’t have taken more than a couple of minutes, but
the downshifting of my emotions takes forever.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Then I notice a woman escorting Mrs. Nobles.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>She holds the door while Prudence slowly
pulls herself along.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">When I turn back Sky looks furious.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Who was that?” he asks.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Actually I sympathize with his anger, because we were reprimanded
like children caught playing “naughty doctor.”<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">She turned the fire hose on us!</i><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>That would’ve been fun if we wanted the hose.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">I answer him, “That’s my neighbor Mrs. Nobles.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Neighbor?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Not
grandmother?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Godmother?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Older aunt?”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“No.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>None of those.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“So why--?”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“It’s hard to explain, but I will . . . Just not tonight.”<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I smile.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>“How about me explaining tomorrow?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Are we still on for lunch or even dinner?”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">His whole countenance lightens up.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>“Most definitely.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>What time shall
I pick you up, Madame?”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Funny he should call me that.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“How about five?”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">“Five it is.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri Light",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">As he turns to leave he lets his arm drop lightly along my arm and
I almost forget Mrs. Nobles.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>He leaves
me hungry for tomorrow.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<br />Lucretia McCloudhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07064997700656978645noreply@blogger.com0